Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of House. But could someone rent them for me for my birthday? Plzthnx.

Four years later marked Zoe's first dance recital. James had put her into dance classes, just like he'd promised that he would. She was in ballet as well as tap, and she'd asked her Uncle James if he'd put her in ballroom when she was older. He promised to pay for lessons for her twelfth birthday.

As it was, she was eight and standing backstage waiting for her class to be called to the stage. She was very nervous, even though both Mom and Daddy had promised that she'd be the best dancer out there. She knew that Uncle James and Aunt Lisa were in the audience, and she hoped that Brian wasn't with them. Brian was still a butthead.

One of the dance instructors came back and got her class, leading them to the stage. Zoe nibbled on her bottom lip nervously, a habit she'd picked up from her mother, and got in line. What if she lost her balance and fell over? Or, even worse, what if stupid Susie got out of step again and knocked her over? She hated Susie. Susie thought she was perfect, but she was a dreadful dancer.

Before she knew it, there was no more time to consider stupid Susie. The music started and it was time to pirouette onto the stage. Zoe took a deep breath before her turn and let it out as she danced onto the stage.

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In the audience, Allison took hold of Greg's hand and squeezed, tears in her eyes as their daughter came on the stage. "Look how beautiful she is," she whispered, leaning into his side.

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and watched as Zoe nailed every single one of the dance steps. She was gifted and there was no doubt about it. He hoped that she'd stick with the arts and keep her nose out of medicine; the last thing he wanted to do was open a family practice. Not to mention the fact that her name would get her everywhere in the medical world. She should have to work a bit for whatever it was she wanted so that she fully understood the value of it.

Allison smiled as the dancers took their bows, running off the stage. "Greg," she said softly. "She was perfect."

"She's always perfect," he said with a smirk. "Can we go get her and leave now?"

Allison snorted. "No. She's got another dance."

"How the hell many classes did Jim put her in?" he asked through clenched teeth. He'd be lying if he said he actually enjoyed being here. He loved seeing Zoe perform; it was the other dancers he could do without.

"Just two," she responded with a laugh. She took his hand and caressed it with the pad of her thumb. "She just has one more, Greg. It's the first one after intermission?"

"Well how far away is intermission?"

Allison checked her program and grinned. "Seven dances."

Greg groaned and dropped his head onto the back of the chair.

James, who was sitting directly behind Greg, leaned forward with a smirk. "Bored?"

"Beyond belief."

Lisa rolled her eyes. "Shut up; both of you," she snapped, pulling James back into his seat. "House, if you keep your patience, I'll give you two weeks off clinic."

"Ooh, she's bargaining with me," Greg said with a smirk. "If I keep complaining?"

"Two extra hours per day," she warned.

He frowned and sat up, watching as a new batch of dancers made their way onto the stage. Life sucked hard core right about now.

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After the recital, Greg and Allison took Zoe out for a celebratory dinner. They even treated for Lisa, James, and Brian, too. All four of the adults complimented Zoe on how wonderfully she'd done, and James and Greg went to sit in a booth across from Allison, Lisa, and the kids.

Brian sneered at Zoe once everyone was done giving their compliments. "I think you looked like a pirouetting pansy up there," he said haughtily.

Lisa looked at her son in surprise. "Brian!" she scolded.

Zoe frowned at him. "What do you know about dancing? All you can do is trip all over the place."

Allison gave Zoe a disapproving look. "Zoe Cameron, that's quite enough."

Brian glared at Zoe. "I might be clumsy, but at least I don't need a math tutor."

"I don't need a math tutor!" Zoe exclaimed, standing up. "My tutor is for advanced math, you butthead!"

The mothers of the two warring children tried to stop them from fighting, but to no avail. The two simply continued, despite any efforts on their mothers' parts.

"But you still need him, don't you?"

"Shut up, Brian. At least my parents are married. Do you even know which last name you're supposed to have?" she asked with a sneer.

Greg's jaw dropped and he glared intensely at Zoe. "Zoe Cameron House," he said, his voice low and angry. "Get your snotty little ass over here." When Zoe simply stared at her father with wide eyes instead of moving, he frowned. "Now."

Zoe's lip started to quiver as she dragged her feet on her way to the booth that her father was sitting in. When she stood directly in front of him, Greg took hold of her shoulders. "You owe Brian an apology."

"I-I don't!" she exclaimed, obviously fearful of more scolding from her father. "He insulted me."

"He insulted your intelligence," Greg said angrily. He was upset that Zoe would strike so low and he was even more upset at the distressed look that Lisa and James got when the words had left her lips. "You don't insult his family. Ever. Do you understand?"

"But he-!"

"Do you understand?" he growled.

"Yes," Zoe whispered, looking down at the ground.

"You go apologize," he ordered. "To Brian and to Aunt Lisa and Uncle James."

Zoe shuffled her feet on the floor and sniffled as she tried to hold back tears. "I'm sorry Uncle James," she whispered.

"So they can hear you," Greg said, a warning tone in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Uncle James," she said, her voice stronger, but her face still turned downward.

"Thank you, Zoe."

She turned and went back to the table she'd been sitting at with her mother, Aunt Lisa, and Brian. "I'm sorry, Aunt Lisa," she said.

"Apology accepted."

And then, Zoe met Brian's gaze and her eyes narrowed. "I'm not sorry, Brian," she said angrily, running to the bathroom after she'd exacted her revenge.

Allison stared after her daughter, stunned, before turning to Lisa. "I am so sorry…" she started.

Lisa held up her hand. "She's eight," she pointed out. "We were snotty at eight, too."

With a sigh, Allison excused herself from the group and went to retrieve Zoe from the bathroom. Greg looked at James, taken aback by his daughter's actions. "She doesn't normally act like that… She's been odd lately," he said quietly.

James frowned. "Maybe she's entering puberty?" he suggested.

Greg rolled his eyes. "She's eight, Jim. The chances of her going into puberty this young are slim to none."

Lisa leaned toward the two men from her table. "Jim's right," she told Greg. "She's not too young to start showing signs of puberty."

"I know she isn't," Greg said with a frown. "I'm saying the chances are slim. She's just overexcited from her recital and taking it out in a negative way. I won't let her play piano when we get home and she'll feel bad about it and then really apologize and mean it." He popped a fry into his mouth.

James sighed. "When was her last doctor's appointment?"

Greg rolled his eyes. "Jim, I know how to take care of my kid."

"You don't know, do you?" Lisa asked with a sly smirk.

"No clue. Allison keeps track of them. If she is going into puberty, there really isn't anything a doctor can do about it," he snarked.

Suddenly, Brian spoke up. "Mom?" he asked quietly.

Lisa turned to him. "Yeah, honey?"

"What's puberty?"

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When they arrived home, Zoe went straight to her room. Allison sat on the couch, rubbing her eyes, and Greg sat next to her. He cleared his throat uncomfortably, drawing Allison's attention to him. She quirked an eyebrow to ask, without words, what was going on.

"James mentioned that Zoe might be going into puberty."

Allison's eyes widened. "God, I hope not," she groaned, cuddling into his side. "The last thing I want to do is give her a sex talk."

"She'll be nine in two weeks," he murmured quietly. "I can't help but wonder if they were right."

As if on cue, Zoe came running into the living room, tears in her eyes. "I'm dying!" she exclaimed hysterically. "I'm bleeding from down there and I'm dying!"

Greg snorted and covered it with a cough, and Allison sighed, holding her arms out to her distressed daughter. "Come here, sweetie. You're not dying."

Zoe climbed into her mother's lap and tried to stop her tears. "But there's blood and I can't put a Band-Aid over it or I won't be able to pee," she sniffled.

"Honey…" Allison said with a small laugh. "It's normal to bleed from your vagina once every month. That's called your menstrual cycle, or your period. It means that your body is getting ready to make babies."

"I don't want babies!" Zoe exclaimed tearfully.

"You don't have to have them," Greg cut in, patting her head to calm her. "It's just your body telling you that it will be ready to soon."

"But … if it's ready … won't it make them?"

"Uh…" Greg looked at Allison for help. Allison smirked and sat back, letting Greg explain. Damn it all. "Well… You, ah… Um…"

"Daddy?" Zoe sniffled. "Don't you know?"

Greg laughed uncomfortably. "Yes, I know. It's… Okay. You have to have a boy to make a baby."

Zoe's eyes widened. "I saw Brian tonight! Am I gonna have a baby?" she asked fearfully.

Allison covered her face to try and hide her laughter. "No, Zoe," she said with a giggle. She took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Boys have something called a penis. Women have a vagina. When a man and a woman fall in love and get married, they can have a baby because of the way the penis and the vagina work together."

"But Uncle James and Aunt Lisa aren't married," Zoe said, confused. "So how did they have a baby?"

"Uh…" Allison stumbled, not sure if her daughter was ready to hear the specifics of sex. "Well…" She looked to Greg for help.

He cleared his throat and looked around the room. After locating a small vase, he brought it over to the table and grabbed a magazine that was sitting close by, rolling it up. "When a man and a woman fall in love, they have sex," he told Zoe. "That means that the man puts his penis in the woman's vagina. That's what makes a baby."

Zoe frowned. "That's weird," she said frankly. "How does that work?" Now that she knew she wasn't dying, she was curious about this whole making babies thing.

Greg couldn't believe he was about to do this, but he struggled with his own embarrassment about explaining this to his daughter and trudged forth. "The penis and the vagina fit together like puzzle pieces," he explained.

"It goes inside?" she asked, eyes wide.

"It goes inside," he confirmed, placing the rolled-up magazine into the vase. "Does that explain it?"

Zoe nodded, looking curiously at the magazine in the vase. "So … how do I stop the blood?"

"You don't," Allison said, rubbing Zoe's back. "Come on. I'll show you what to do." She took Zoe's hand and led her to the bathroom.

Greg watched as his wife and his daughter disappeared before dropping his head back and letting out a groan. This wasn't fatherhood; it was insanity.

Author's Note: I know that nine might seem young to start a period, and I wanted to address that. I was nine when I started; some women just start young like that.