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Chapter 7
CRUEL IRONY
Atem pressed the down button for the elevator and stepped back.
His hand automatically worked its way between the opened slit of his bag to finger the thick brown envelope. He'd been doing that all day, much to his annoyance. Just as his mother had said, he'd found the envelope in his mail the next day. She'd only given him one day's warning and that rankled.
The elevator dinged open, and he stepped in.
He still hadn't opened the envelope yet, though. He wasn't sure if he ever would. He sighed now and unclenched his jaw. He'd been doing that all day, too. Sighing, clenching his jaw. Devlin had told him he looked like a love-struck fool, and insisted that Atem could confide in him about any romantic issues. Atem had reacted with the only kind of logic the situation warranted: he'd given Devlin a sound whack over the head with the largest folder at his disposal while managing to make it look like an accident.
Another ding. He stepped out of the elevator and made his way out of the building. The temperature was far too warm for his liking. He raked a hand through his hair.
Actually, Devlin's comment had made him consider what he was exactly, if not love-struck. He knew he wasn't, but he was definitely struckby something, that was certain.
A pair of large violet-flecked eyes flashed in his mind. They'd taken permanent residence in the back of his mind without his permission. The expression on the boy's face from that night had been niggling at his mind. Shock, bewilderment, maybe a little hurt, he wasn't sure. Those large eyes could definitely do the wounded thing well, that was for sure. Atem squashed down a groan. He still didn't know exactly why it bothered him whether the boy had been hurt by what he did.
And what had he done, anyway? Enjoyed himself that was all.
No. It wasn't all, if he was honest with himself. It wasn't all by a long shot. He'd wanted to hurt the boy, he knew. He'd wanted to see the look of bewilderment in those eyes. Wanted to chase the boy away. Show the boy, show himself, that the boy didn't affect him so.
Instead, if the last few weeks were anything to go by, his plan had backfired.
"Yugi!"
He stiffened at the sound of the name, only stumbling a little, and kept his gaze straight ahead. The boy must be nearby he concluded. It took all his energy not to turn around and sweep the area until he found those large eyes and narrow shoulders.
"Yug!" The sound came from his right. He stalked determinedly into the cafe and glared at the line leading up to the counter.
He crossed his arms, foot tapping against the wooden floor. The line moved a little. He uncrossed his arms, only to find his hand inching towards the bag again. His fingers slid over the bump of the envelope, gripped it, then pulled it out of the bag. It seemed to burn in his hands.
"Atem Sennen" the address began. 'Sennen' was his mother's surname. He had always used it, and he had never been curious about the name of whichever man had fathered him. And now this envelope was trying to answer that question. A question he had never even thought to ask. Never cared to ask. He clenched his teeth, and shoved the envelope back in angrily. He hated being forced into things.
"Can I get you anything?"
He looked up, still glaring.
The girl looked alarmed, and followed her question with a high-pitched "Sir?"
"A frappuchino, thanks," he bit out, as calmly as he could manage. Which, going by the girl's demeanour, wasn't that calm.
The girl breathed the required amount nervously, holding the cup over the counter.
Atem dug in the side pocket of his bag for coins. He hadn't closed the main opening he realized. Maybe the envelope would do him a favour and fall out of his bag when he wasn't looking.
He handed over the coins and exited the cafe with his drink. He heard a shuffling to his left. A boy was jogging away from the cafe, a tall boy with short hair. Atem recognised him as one of Yugi's friend from that night at the bar. He turned around to yell "And for God's sake, take care of yourself. You look like hell!" before jogging off once more.
Again, Atem resisted the urge to scan the area for that familiar figure his mind had apparently grown fond of. He couldn't help wondering why it was that Yugi had to take care of himself. Was the boy ill? The friend had been grinning a little, but his tone suggested that he was half-serious. Why did the boy look like hell? Realizing he was frowning, Atem shook his head in an attempt to clear his mind.
His feet automatically took him to his favourite spot. It wasn't one that was known to many people, and even those who knew it didn't seem to like it, favouring the more sun-lit places. But he found that the privacy of the quiet, almost hidden spot behind the library suited him completely, and he relished the solitude it offered him.
He dropped onto the bench with a sigh and took a sip of his drink. Though the area was much more sheltered from the sun, the warmth of the summer air was still present and the cold drink was blissful.
He took another sip then placed the cup down on the bench next to him. He leaned back, resting his arms on the back of the bench. It was good to be alone again. At least, now he could be haunted by his clamorous thoughts in peace. Thoughts of envelopes, aggravating mothers, and large violet-flecked eyes. The eyes, especially.
"Ugh!" He groaned into the silence and tossed his head back, expelling a large sigh.
His mind always managed to find an excuse to dwell on the boy. Atem didn't know why Yugi was still in his head. It had been a good three weeks or so since he'd last seen the boy. Or since the boy had last seen him, he thought with exasperation.
That night was so vivid in Atem's mind.
He had been so hungry for Seto and then seeing the boy at the bar had dampened that hunger. Then he'd been hungry for Seto to dispel the boy from his mind. And the boy's widened eyes later that night had only served to make Atem angrier. He'd been doing his best to forget the boy and the boy had only made it more difficult. It wasn't something he was accustomed to.
So Atem had viciously shoved his pleasure in the boy's face, in the hopes that it would make him disappear. And the boy had disappeared.
But not from his mind, he thought bitterly, another sigh escaping him now. He took another sip from his drink, then placed the cup down and leaned back, lettings his limbs sag.
A scuffling to his right made his ears prickle. A figure hovered in the corner of his vision, and Atem lolled his head to the side.
His insides stilled. It was the boy.
Yugi.
Atem hadn't realized until that moment just how badly he'd wanted to see the boy again.
He was standing a few feet away holding something in his hand, a bag over his shoulders, and that lip – that lip was caught between his teeth again.
Atem watched as the boy slowly made his way over to the bench, reluctance lacing every movement. He stayed ridiculously still, almost as if any sudden movements would make the boy disappear.
Yugi came closer, and Atem could easily see a small tongue peek out between the lips and wet them. He resolutely kept his own tongue trapped in his mouth.
"Sorry to interrupt, but you dropped this."
Atem tore his gaze away from the boy's eyes and peered down.
He wanted to scoff. The boy was holding an envelope, specifically the envelope. The one that had been plaguing him for nearly a week. He stared it at disbelievingly. So it had fallen out, he thought dryly. And now the boy was returning it to him.
Surely this qualified as a cruel irony.
Atem lifted his gaze back to the boy's to see nervousness and confusion there. Yugi's cheeks were flaming red and Atem wondered if the boy was remembering the last night their gazes had held.
"I'll just leave this here," the boy muttered, bending to place the envelope on the bench. He straightened, and after throwing another glance in Atem's direction, turned around, stumbling over his own feet in his haste to get away.
The haste irritated Atem. But it didn't irritate him nearly as much as the fact that his insides were protesting the boy's departure.
"Wait," he barked.
The boy stopped, and then turned halfway. His round eyes settled on Atem, sending a wave of satisfaction crashing over him that he decided to ignore.
"Why don't you join me?"
The boy's lips parted. He looked away, regarding the tree to his right, then turned around and slowly made his way back to the bench.
Atem plucked the envelope off the bench and shoved it in his bag. He twisted back around to see Yugi lowering himself gingerly onto the bench next to him. There was a good two feet between them and Yugi's stiffness was undeniable.
"I don't bite, for your information." Atem didn't know if he should be relieved by the fact that he didn't sound as irritated as he felt.
"Oh." The boy shot him a sidelong glance. "That's a relief," he muttered.
A laugh shot out of Atem, taking him by surprise.
Yugi shot him a small smile, and despite the uncertainty of it, Atem found his insides warming.
Their gazes held, and Atem watched in interest as a sliver of pink appeared across the boy's cheeks before Yugi turned away.
"This is a nice place," he remarked.
Atem nodded. "Yeah, not many people know it. It's handy for getting away."
"I'll bet," Yugi murmured, looking up at the overhanging trees, their branches swaying a little in the slight breeze. "I would love to have a spot like this, to escape from everything."
Atem peered at the boy sitting next to him. "You're kind of young to be shunning the world already, aren't you?"
"I'm not that young." Yugi turned to fix him with an indignant gaze that left Atem trying to fight back a smile. "Besides, privacy is a privilege everyone deserves, whatever their age."
Atem felt a corner of his mouth lift. "Touché," he murmured, his eyes on the boy's face. This time the boy didn't look away and Atem was able to see the dark circles under the boy's eyes, the tiredness that touched his features. Atem frowned. "You don't look so good."
"Huh?"
"You look tired," Atem explained, realizing that the niggling feeling was concern for the boy.
"Oh." Yugi blinked. "Yeah, I've just had a lot of work lately."
"But it's only a few weeks into uni – you've still got some time before midterms, don't you?"
"Right, I meant my job. I work at this gaming store in town."
Atem couldn't keep the frown off his face. "It seems as if they're overworking you. Don't they know you're a student as well?" He lifted his right leg onto the bench, shifting in order to face the boy properly.
Yugi blinked wide eyes up at him. "Yeah, they do . . ." he stared up at Atem with curiosity.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"So?" Atem leaned closer to the boy. "Why don't you tell them to back off?"
"I can't. I've . . ." the boy sighed and looked away, biting his lip again and Atem wished very much that he wouldn't. "I've just got this flatting situation – my flatmate bailed so I'm stuck trying to pay the rent every week, which means I really need the extra hours." Yugi shrugged, a noncommittal gesture, before turning his eyes back on Atem.
"Well, I hope you're taking care of yourself," Atem found himself murmuring.
Yugi blinked again, staring up at Atem with something like wonder. "Um . . . why?" he breathed.
"Because . . ." Their bodies swayed closer together. Or maybe it was just Atem's imagination. "I would hate to see you unwell."
The sparse sunlight filtering through the trees made Yugi's eyes shine a brighter violet than Atem had thought possible. It was the violet that dominated, not the grey, he realized. He hadn't known that violet could be so mesmerizing, that it could brim with such life, such warmth. He leaned in further.
"You would?" Yugi croaked at him.
"Of course," Atem breathed over Yugi's face, watching the boy's eyelids flutter a little. His lips itched for Yugi's.
"Why?" the boy asked again.
"Because – because I. . ." Care about you.
Atem blinked, his face inches away from Yugi's. He pulled back and stood up in a single motion, gulping down air. Raking a hand through his hair, he picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder, before fixing a smile on his face and turning to the boy.
Yugi's brow was wrinkled, and his lips parted as he stared up at him, and Atem was forced to concede that even 'confused' looked good on the boy.
"I've got to run, little Yugi, but I'm sure we'll see each other again."
Yugi sputtered, brows lifting. "Little?"
Atem laughed, winking, and reached out a finger to tap the boy's nose. He could see how his patronizing gestures were irritating the boy, but he only grinned before turning to stride away. 'Little' was exactly right, he thought to himself savagely as he rounded the corner, allowing the smile to slide off his lips. Yugi was far too young and the sooner Atem came to grips with the idea, the better.
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