Chapter Seven
Shock doesn't even start to describe what hits me. Or everyone sitting with me. But then there is such a huge cheer that I jump. I feel everyone patting me on the back, halfway hugging me. It's chaos. I hear random phrases break out over the noise.
"That's my sister," Toby says before hugging me.
"Knew you had it in you!" Miriam cheers happily.
"I can only imagine the looks on all the faces of all the other people," Roger says with a laugh.
"They'll be so curious as to what you showed them," Nymal says.
"Talk about a star!" Frandle says.
"I always knew I had a good district!" Deidra says, clearly happy for the good publicity this will make for her.
But after everyone takes a moment to freak out, we settle down just long enough to see the rest of the scores. Ten receives a six and a three. Eleven gets an eight and a five, which throws everyone. Usually kids from these outer districts are lucky to get a six or seven. But Three of us have just blown that out of the water. And then we're thrown again when Ash from Twelve gets and eight also, but aren't surprised when the girl only gets a four.
Caesar Flicker wraps up but none of us listen. We're freaking out about our scores. No one can fully get how I pulled a ten. A ten! The excitement builds in me as I feel overwhelmed with this news. I could stand a chance. Sponsors would see that ten and now think about trusting in me. Maybe I could win this thing..!
We celebrate for the rest of the evening before bed. We snack on chocolates and pastries for dessert, drinking a wonderful drink they call hot chocolate. It's delicious and I drink four cups before I finally get to bed. At first, I just lay there, thinking about how wonderful this day has been. A ten! I can't believe I got a ten! What a wonderful thing! I settle into happy dreams about things with a ten in them.
When I wake, it's to Deidra summoning me to get up and get ready for a big day. That's right. We start getting ready for our interviews today. Tomorrow is when they take place. It's the last chance to secure sponsors and it's the first time the whole entirety of Panem will really get to know each and every one of us.
I quickly shower and dress into a floral dress I find. I'm happy for dresses, because they are my preference if I'm not doing much. Then I make my way out for breakfast, where everyone else is already seated. I sit down and eat sufficiently. Everyone is quiet for a while until Roger finishes and turns his attention to Toby and me.
"Alright, you two. We'll split you up today. Toby, you're going to start with me, Nymal, and Miriam. We're going to pick and polish your approach for the interview. Then you'll go spend some time with Deidra. Truely, you're going to be switched. Mainly because we'd like to know Toby's first before we tackle yours. We'll have four hours for each, and an hour in between for lunch. Sound good?" Toby and I nod, though I'm not sure what could take four hours with Deidra.
I quickly find out. She first has me practice walking in heels with a large, extremely heavy gown on. It takes an hour to do this, because my biggest problem is staying balanced and not lifting the skirt above my ankles. Then the rest of the time is practicing talking, siting up straight, how precisely to sit. Little details that need to be practiced. But by the end, Deidra is smiling. "You'll so look the part!"
We settle down for lunch, then, and eat. It's a quiet affair, but not a tense one. I feel hollow on the inside, so I easily choke down two whole plates of food and several glasses of that wonderful hot chocolate. But then it's time to go talk with the mentors for whichever approach we're going for.
They sit in a half circle in front of me in a small room I've never been in, despite it being on our floor. They all are looking at me, thinking. Finally, Nymal decides to speak out loud. "You definitely look vulnerable. You look like easy prey. You won't be on most of the tributes' radar, especially the Careers. But everyone will have noticed your ten, and they will either know, expect, or wonder. What earned you that ten, no one but us and the Gamemakers know. It's an advantage for you, but at the same time, vulnerable might not be the best approach."
I nod. This is true. But no one says anything else. My mind is going for a while, too, when I get an idea. "Well, what if we combined two traits?"
Miriam smiles. "What's your idea?"
"Well, I look vulnerable. Maybe I should still act vulnerable. With the way I speak or address things. Be sweet. Innocent. Fragile. You know, play the look. But really, I can play one other role too."
The mentors are looking at me curiously. Obviously they get the first part and seem to like it. But they don't see the connection. But I only smile until someone speaks. And it's Roger. "What else could possibly work with vulnerable?"
I let myself laugh. "Well, I've already played this role too." Everyone continues to stare at me, so I just sigh and spit it out. "Fighter."
I see comprehension on their faces, but then confusion. Nymal is the one who addresses it. "Truely, you can't be vulnerable and a fighter."
I smile. "Sure I can. Everyone knows I'm vulnerable by size alone. I'm not strong. I'm from Nine, which means I've never really eaten well. And I have my brother. I'm vulnerable. But, that doesn't mean I'm not a fighter. Like I told you, I started fighting for my life since the day I was born. Maybe I'm a fighter in the sense that I have the most to lose, and I'm determined to fight."
I see understanding sink in. "So you're physically vulnerable, but internally, you're all fight?"
I nod. "And it's kind of true. If I get in a combat situation, I'm gone. They don't have to know about my knife throwing skills. I don't even want to let that be a dependency. I want people to know I'm quick, I'm smart, and I'm strong internally. That I won't let it get to my head. It goes both ways. When my name was drawn, people saw I was brave. That I took it. That even though my sister was killed, I wasn't going to give up yet. I'm not going to give up. But they saw the vulnerability when my brother's name was called. No one has to know that… that it's already been decided who we're trying to save. They just have to have one of my weaknesses. And they already have it. Might as well play on it."
They seem to digest this a little, but then they're nodding. Roger even chuckles. "You know, I like this approach. Basically, you're being you, minus the knives."
I nod. "Essentially, yes."
"Well good. That will make it harder for you to mess up and give you more of a chance to shine. The only big question is how will you sound?"
I know what he means, and it's a hard question. I think a while before nodding. "Sweet, of course. Play it like I'm innocent. Not so lethal. Pretend that all I have going for me is my will to survive."
Everyone chuckles, thinking this is good, but Roger shakes his head. "You need to throw in your temper. Somewhere."
I bite my lip. "Why?"
"Because temper will be a clue to why you scored high. And if you show temper, they know you did something gutsy. Tributes won't see this. They'll overlook you. And most mentors will too. But the sponsors? They'll see it. They like the drama and they'll be willing to invest in you. I want you to play sweet on everything, but one thing. You need to decide what your temper is focused on."
I think for a while, knowing that what set me off last time was the Gamemakers and knowing they were disregarding the tributes. I thought of all the starving kids who couldn't stand a chance. I thought of all the kids who depend on a good score for a chance to survive. I thought about how it's so easy for these kids to be murdered by the Careers, who always get the attention. But it's not until now that I realize that the one thing this is all connected to is Constance.
It hits me like a wall. Was I really that angry? Yes… I was. Because I thought about her and how she didn't get a good score. It didn't matter if she was one of the best interviewed tributes, because she was so easy to love. Everyone remembered her mediocre score. No sponsor would help a six over a nine or ten. And because of that, she died.
I look at Miriam, and I can see it in her eyes that she has just realized with me what my temper was sparked by. I look at Roger and Nymal and sigh. "Constance."
They seem to understand the whole meaning of this. How my sister, only twelve at the time, was the root to all my feelings about the Games. Why I needed to survive, so my parents didn't have to burry a third child. How my younger brothers and sisters couldn't lose a third sibling. Not when so many of them depended on our tesserae. How they'd all starve.
Roger draws this connection when I do. "I want you to make sure your family is talked about. And when you talk about them, show them fire. Show them anger. Show them that fighter. Any other time, I want you to be as vulnerable as a newborn babe in the middle of a lion's den. Don't show that fighter until your family is the center of it. If they ask about your family, don't let the fire come out until it's asked what they mean to you. Then let it consume you. Everyone will see it. And people will have a glimpse at what the fighter will look like when she's in the arena."
I nod, liking this idea. And I knew that this would be what worked. I'd be sweet, innocent, tiny, vulnerable Truely Stellar. All until they mentioned the value of my family. I'd make sure everyone knew that I wouldn't let them starve. I'd not let them be saddened by the loss of two children, two siblings in one Games. One of us was coming home. And I was going to try and make it me.
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