The days have past. The external cuts have healed but the same cannot be said for the internal.

Arthur was released from prison the day after Michael. Himself being covered in bruises and cuts. Tommy's been running round like a mad man. Polly is heart broken. Ada went back to London. For once it seem that the only sane one at the time was John.

After leaving the prison with Michael we walked. No place to go or time to be there. We walked around for what seemed like hours. No words being spoken. Just the sound of pebbles under our feet and Michael's lungs breathing out smoke. As we walked our hands remained entangled. Our fingers weaved like a basket. I never thought to break the hold unless prompted to. I can tell this is what he needed.

Time and silence.

It was easy to tell his mind was going a million miles per hour while our feet did the opposite. I would glance over from time to time. The profile of his face almost becoming my new favorite view. I would turn away when I found myself getting lost in the damages that ensued. My eyes tracing over the bloody lines and caked on grime.

When my feet begin to ache I make the quiet suggestion of stopping off at the Garrison. I get a curt nod as a response before we redirect ourselves down Main Street.

The doors are pushed open to reveal the quiet pub. Since it's well into the afternoon the morning crowd has left for work only leaving the one or two lads who normally are normally past out on the tables. I go sit at one of the tables but am jostled back by the boy to my left.

"We'll go in the private room."

You would normally protest saying how that's the room for the Shelby family's private affairs but you can't seem to object to the boy at the moment.

Michael opens the door for me gesturing to go first. In doing so the contact you two have been sharing for so long is lost. I wait for Micheal to come in and make himself comfortable before opening the window that connects the nook to the bar.

"Hey Harry?"

The bartender quickly saunter over as if was Tommy standing in my place.

"Hey there Kenzie. Something you need?"

Well that's a loaded bloody question.

"Yes could I have a pint of mild as well as a small amount of vodka, water and a rag." After listing of the items I turn my back to rest against the wall, my view turning to Michael once more.

He seems to be sat in his own world. Eyes focused on the top of the table in front of him. Hand drawing back from his lips to release smoke. Must of been his fifth or sixth cigarette in the last hour. I can't find myself to judge or care.

"Here you are. Kenz. Anything else?"

Turning back I find a tray with all my requested items. "Quite alright. Thanks Harry." I went to place my payment on the counter but a protest was quickly heard.

"No, no, no, it's on the house."

Well I guess that's what happens when you walk into the pub with one of the owners relatives. I have the man a tight lipped smile before balancing the tray on my hand using the other the close the window doors. Spinning around I place the tray on the table which gains Micheal's attention. I take the beer pint off the tray and place it in front of him before walking around the table to situate myself

next to the boy.

Our thighs brush as I adjust myself against the padded seat I had only found myself on once before.

"Hi."

The greeting is quiet. Almost a whisper. If I wasn't as close I might have missed it. The first word to come out of his mouth since he had spoken to his mother. He himself had shifted to have his arm around the part of the back of the seat that I sat upon. It was a warm greeting. No undertones of sadness of malice.

"Hi yourself."

I let out what I thought to be a witty reply. He seemed to think so to as he let out a light laugh. I reached forward to grab the rag before dipping it in the small glass of water. Michael's eyes followed my actions.

"Is it alright if I clean you up a bit?"

My words were whispered as I didn't want to disrupt the peacefulness we established. His face was only a few inches from mine. He nodded before turning his head to release the smoke he inhaled away from me. With his head turned my hands quickly reached up with the cloth and light dabbed over the left side of his face. I knew doing this would not clean him completely but it would help. I needed it to help.

I needed to help him.

This went on for some time. I would ring out the rag before re wetting it. Michael would alternate between his cigarette and sipping his brew. When the water in the cup has turned a murky brown color I knew I did all I could as of now. My hand remained lightly over his split lip. Trying not to hurt him even further.

"There. It's like your a new man."

After saying those words a realized how true they were. After what happened he's a new man. "It would seem like I am."

I froze at his reply. He knows it. I know it. The boy I showed around Small Heath for the first time a few weeks ago has been replaced by the man sitting in front of me.

As I brought my hand down, finally done with cleaning him up, his hand quickly shit out and grasped my wrist. It remained there between the two of us. Just under our chins. It wasn't a harsh or tight grip, just there to hold me in place.

"Why did you come?"

"What?"

"Why did you come this morning. To see me as I got out?"

His eyes were searching for answers . Looking all over my face to find them.

"We'll I needed to be there for Pol—"

"No cut the shit. You weren't there for her. If you were, you wouldn't have left with me."

It was true. I wanted myself to believe I was there to support the woman who was always there to support me in my time of need but that wasn't true. I needed to see with my own eyes what was done to Michael. I needed to know if he was okay.

"I - I just needed to see you."

"Why?"

"Why does it matter?"

He wasn't letting this go. And he wasn't letting me off the hook that way either.

"Because I need to know."

"You need to know what?!"

My voice was begging to grow louder. The serenity that we were once surrounded by had been broken. The distance between us seemed to grow smaller. I could smell the mix of smoke and mild ale on his breath. The grip he had on my wrist began to tighten as I tried to untangle myself from him.

"Because I need to know if you feel the same way. Alright."

Everything stops. My arm stills, no longer trying to get out of his grip. I could even say my heart stoped for a moment. Maybe even my breathing.

The same way.

What way was that exactly. The way you feel when you see him enter the same room as you. The way you feel when you just do happen to brush up against him. Or even the way you felt not even five minutes ago when you had to clean him. Rid him from the damages that were afflicted upon him. The way you feel when your hands are interlocked. Like nothing can hurt you.

I realize this is the first time I allow myself to feel these things. They're coming to the surface after being buried deep down. I'm not sure why but you know they have been.

"McKenzie."

His free hand comes to caress my left cheek. I close my eyes as I lean closer to the warmth.

"I know you feel it too. Please just tell me you do."

I open my eyes to find his looking right back. Staring full of what looks like hope.

I don't respond. Not verbally at least. My forehead leans forward to connect with his own. His grip loosening on my wrist so that are palms meet.

"I'm scared."

There's the truth.

The truth I've been hiding from even myself. As these feelings began to blossom I duh them so deep that they had been lost. I've never felt this way before. And that scared me.

"So you feel it to then?"

I can only nod as a small tear falls from my eye. I'm so overwhelmed with the new emotions taking over.

It's not love.

Not yet at least. There's so many things that need to be discovered before it can be love. But what it is, is a deep admiration. A joyous feeling.

"Yes."

That's all he needs to hear.

His hands quickly move to the back of my neck and My head is thrusted forward. We're now connected by the warmth of each others lips. Before I know what I'm doing my hands place themselves on the tops of his shoulders. We're separated before I can truly even realize what was happening. Heavy breathing coming from him and me.

My forehead still leaning against his own. A smile dawns his feature now creating a small one to over me too.

"I've been wanting to do that for a while."

You lean back, separating yourself to fully see the figure in front of you.

"Then why didn't you?"

It's a bold statement. Causing you both to laugh. He doesn't respond. Just keep his sights on you for a few moments more.

"Let's get you home, yeah?"

So that all leads us on to where we are today.

Currently I'm sitting in "Michael's office" which is really Tommy's but Michael has s desk there. He's on the phone with someone who has called seemingly looking for the middle Shelby.

"No I'm afraid Mr. Shelby is in London, he can't be reached.— he won't be back today, he's at the races."

I watched the interaction from where I sat perched on the corner of Michael's desk.

Since the events that transpired those days ago, him and I have been nearly inseparable. Whether he's with me in the shop or I'm with him in the office we always find ourselves drifting towards one another.

Polly enters the room with a basket in her hands. Most likely items to help Michael. I give the woman a smile and she quickly returns it with an almost knowing look.

I made it a duty to seek out the woman the next day following the events at the prison. I wanted her to know I never meant her harm and she was someone I truly respect and care for.

"Oh silly girl. Of course I know that. You think I'd be mad because you weren't there to dry my eyes. You were there for him and that's so much more than I could have ever asked for."

We ended the discussion with a hug and a promise to sit down with each other for tea soon.

The woman made her way over to her son and adjusted his collar as he finished the call. "I'm going to the station—."

Before Pol could finished the stubborn boy made his way over to his own desk. As he past I made sure to dig my shoe into his leg with a look that said 'really?'.

He ignored it before taken off his coat and putting on the back of his chair. Before he sat down he placed his hand on my knee slightly rubbing his thumb.

Damn him.

He knows I can't be annoyed with him for long. Nothing was official between us. We weren't courting or dating or boyfriend and girlfriend.

We were just us. And I was more than happy with that. We hadn't exercised much proof of this though. Only subtle touches here or there. Normally it being him who orchestrated them. No kisses have been exchanged since the first. The pace that things were going were nice and sweet.

That being said Polly seems like she's ready to start organizing the wedding. We've said nothing to her of our circumstance but she has the mothering instinct. She also has caught a bit of our endearing actions.

Michael ignores her as she starts unloading her goods. He focuses on the book of numbers in front of him. I remain concentrated on the skirt in my lap that I've been hemming. It's none of my business what goes on between a son and mother.

"What's that?"

I peer up to see Michael sat back in his chair gesturing to an object Polly has just placed upon the desk. I look over to see three very large rolled up stacks of paper. I think we both know what it is but are in too much shock to believe it.

"That money's yours."

She grabs a roll and uses it to point at Michael.

"You take the money, you get s train, you start a new life in London. I don't want to see you here when I get back."

My breath gets caught in my throat. The skirt as well as my needle and thread drop off my lap to the floor before I can notice.

I watch as Michael just sits there staring at the cash placed in front of him while he dabs of the end of his cigarette

"If I get back."

Polly throws her rag back into the basket.

"Everything's and If in the Birmingham life. You can write some days and visit on Holy days. But I want you to wash this city out your hair and clothes. It's what I should've done at the start. Now I've got business to attend to."

She fidgets with the book firmly grasp in her hand. She moves around the desk to stand behind Michael and places her hand atop his shoulder.

"I do love you Michael."

He waits a moment before responding.

"I love you too. You'll miss your train."

As the woman I've known to be a second mom goes to leave I can't find myself to look at her. There's an anger that swells in me. I know it shouldn't but it does. She a mother that wants the best for her child and while I understand that, in this moment I hate he for it.

She comes and stands before me but I refuse to lift my head. Still staring at the bundle of cloth that now lies on the wood floor.

A hand is placed over my own that are placed in the lap. I then realize how they are no longer still but have a slight shake. My eyes remain locked. Her hand simply gives my a tight squeeze then is gone. Her heels echo throughout the hall.

The silence feels like the loudest thing I've ever heard.

"Are you going to go?"

My heart breaks as I ask the question but it needs to be done.

I finally lift my head to look at him. My questions hangs in the air without an answer for some time. It's unnerving honestly. Feels like my heart has dropped into my stomach.

"Do you think I should?"

I have to think over his question. One side of me wants to scream at him, hit him for even asking that question. But the other knows Polly is right. If I truly care about the man who sits in front of me I have to want what's best for him.

"I want what's best for you."

Michael shifts in his seat seeming annoyed at my respond.

"But-"

He stops moving to look at me properly.

"I also want to be selfish and have you do what's best for me. And that would be for you to stay right here and for me to stay right here and for us to stay. Together."

I comes out like vomit before I could suppress it. My own selfish wants and needs. How pathetic. Not everything developed around you,McKenzie. This is his life we're talking about.

"Come 'ere."

His hands reaches out and grabs my leg pulling me off his desk. He hands joins my and before I can ask he pulls me down onto his lap.

I'll admit I'm a bit awkward at first but he hand reaches behind my back before situating it's self on my hip. He shifts back so he flush against the back of his chair. My head resting just between his neck and shoulder, legs across his lap.

I let out a comfortable sigh. We've never done this before but it feels like home.

My eyes glance down as my hand plays with his own. Poking and playing with each others fingers.

"I had made up my mind before she even left the room." His words are whispered gently in my ear as we both rest peacefully.

"Do we have to say goodbye?"

His first response was to place his lips against my head. His actions cause my nerves to erupt.

This is it. He's leaving. He's going to go off to London and start his life. Leaving his mother behind, his uncles behind, Small Heath behind and me behind.

"Not when we've only just said hello."

A small sob breaks through.

I bury my head deeper in his neck to try and hide my emotions. The tears would've flown either way. But thank god it's this way.

"Shh love. Relax. Take a rest, yeah? I'll be here when you wake."

Those are the only words I needed to here before I allow myself to pass out from the emotional exhaustion.

-/;/—-/::/-/

Whack

The noise wakes Michael and I abruptly. My hands quickly raise to my eyes and try to run the sleep out of them.

"Polly and I had a bet."

The source of the noise is Tommy who is sauntering back into his office. I sit up to allow Michael to stretch while I do the same before standing. Michael follows in suit letting out a sleepy groan as he gets to his feet.

The noise created makes me release a small laugh. He rubs his face before giving me a sleepy smile. We both move to follow Tommy who is in his office room.

"One of us bet you'd take the money and go. And one of us bet you'd still be here.

You stand by the offices entryway as Michael steps further in. You watch as the boy you know stands with his hands in his pockets listening to his uncle.

"She wants me to stay."

I agree with the statement. If Polly truly wanted Michael gone, he would be gone.

"Now which she are you refereeing to?"

I drop my head as a blush creeps up my neck. It's no secret now, especially considering how Tommy just walked in on the two is us.

I look up to find Michael's as well as Tommy's gaze on me as I'm still perched in the doorway.

"Mm. You know something Michael? What Polly wants will always be a mystery to me."

The two men gather around the desk as Tommy puts down the glasses and bottle he's just collected from his cabinet.

"Get in here Kenz."

I automatically listen to gangsters words. Gently falling in behind. I come up next to Michael who's standing cross from Tommy, who pouring drinks for us all. I decide to sit in the chair in front of the desk watching the two's exchange.

The man to my right places both of his fist on his uncles desk before leaning over slightly.

"I've decided.

I want to make real money.

With you."

Both men grasp their glasses before raising them high. A silent cheer said between them before they down the amber liquid.

I don't move. I can't move. I feel like I'm frozen to this very chair. My breathing has nulled.

Both men sit after. Tommy leans back in his big leather chair before releasing a grand sigh. A sigh that tells me a weights been lifted from him.

My hand that's been gripping the wood beneath me has been gently peeled away replaced with the warmth I know.

"I've got some ideas, Michael.

For the future of the company.

And also I'm planning on getting married."

I lean forward grabbing the drink set in front of me before tossing it back. The burning of the liquid coursing through me.

I let out a deep but silent breath looking at who I sit with now.

Not one but two gangsters.

I glance to my right to find him looking right back at me. As if he knows.

He's never looked so at peace before. Almost like this is what he was made to do. My hand is given a gentle squeeze before he himself leans back looking satisfied.

It's in this moment I come to realize there's no going back.

My life will never be the same.