Filler: First Lullaby (Saisho no komori-uta)

(note: It is a filler, part of the memory of both of them. It will be well connected with the rest of the story

Timeline: approximately 20 years ago from the present timeline)


"The ones that love us, never really leave us, and you can find them... in here"- ~Sirius Black~

The air seemed quite cold tonight… the natural warmth that she felt near her chest wasn't there. She could feel her sleep was driving away, a flapping noise like agitated bird's wings can be heard and it was growing slowly and steadily

And with that gust of wind slamming on her window, her trance was completely gone.

'Ryu… move a bit… I have to close the window, it's raining….'

But she was alone in her bed…. Ryu was not there….where was he? Like the reflex action she tried to glance back at the wall where she hung the paper cutting, but it was gone! There was no ceiling fan, her bed was wider and her pillow fluffier…. What was happening? Even in the moist darkness with the instrumental of rain she could see everything clearly. Her window…. Her window was bigger and lined with white brocade curtains instead of linen…. The furnishing was exquisite yet simple…. This was definitely not her room.

Outrageous, she tried to jump from her bed, but anticipating the height of the bed wrong, she fell on the floor, with her head being bowed at the front. The thing that came after that was even more astonishing…..

She had long black wavy locks of hair…. Symmetrical and possibly cut in layers….

She straightened up, and stood…. Her feet were clean and translucent, not spotty or scarred, and so was her hand, she was wearing a frilly white lace nighty and her chest was twice as bigger than her real, underplayed, petite, gamine chest. She felt her face next…. No, it does feel like her face… what was happening…

Knock knock…. Someone was at the door…. 'Coming….' Said Yu, but her voice was more pitched than usual. She didn't wanted to answer the person outside the door, but the owner of the body had something else in her mind.

As if her body wasn't her own, she opened the door and greeted an old man that was standing outside her door; he had a familiar face but Yu didn't recognised where she had seen it, but regardless, she greeted him as 'Is something wrong Mr. Wammy, it's two in the morning….'

'I am sorry Mamoru for disturbing your sleep…. But I had no choice whatsoever, '

What did he just said?

Mamoru?

'Mamoru' is usually a masculine name and is not commonly used as a girl's name in Japan…. Could this be….

'I know it was absolutely rude of me to wake you up in the ungodly hour, but you have to-' Mr. Wammy said while he straightened his glasses.

'Not that…. I was just….' She tried to change the topic 'I was wondering what could possibly trouble Mr. Wammy to wake me up…. Is everything all right? Nothing… bad I presume?'

'Yes… and no… but it is as much troubling as a bad news would' Mr Wammy regretted and seeing her quizzical expression he said 'you see Roger had turned up from the main office and with a new…. Admission. It has been two hours since we tried to ease up the kid, but he doesn't seem to be opening up and he refused anything I had gave him…. Toys, stories, petting…' He huffed 'I think we are in need of a female assistance here…. I think we in our suits and attires are too intimidating for him, would you come downstairs and take a good look at him?' Although the tone seemed to be humble, it was a concealed order.

'You don't have to request me Mr. Wammy, I will surely meet him… just give me some moments. I will meet you downstairs….' The girl bowed then shut the door.

What just happened, who was she…? It seemed like she was in someone else's body, but the sense that she is into someone's body was there…. Mirror…. She needed a mirror, she needed to see who was she… a demonic curiosity was eating her up and there! She found the mirror, in the bathroom in her room…. And her reflection startled her….

It was Yu, who she saw in her mirror, only with long wavy black hair brushing her waist and some strands fell over her perky and beautifully round breast…. She was a little taller and her hands were bigger…. But the only feature that explained everything to her was the stormy grey eyes….

Oka-san? Is that you

Yu traced her face over and over with her long hands…. It was her first time meeting her mother… she always knew she had her father's dark deep-set eyes…. How old is she? 16 like Yu? No…. may be a little older… 18 will be the perfect age…. The more she looked at the mirror the more she grew emotional. So her mother was an orphan? Poor her…. But the environment of the orphan home seems very warm and friendly.

In a trance she got dressed, thinking about the unforgettable kindness and beauty of her mother….she hastily wrapped the blush-coloured dressing gown around her lying near the settee, and threw her dishevelled hair in a loose updo... as she descended down the stairs; she saw something black and furry peeking from the back of the couch. Like she is playing peek-a-boo she approached it slowly and silently, and finally saw a little boy in dull pink overcoat and white comforter, hugging himself on the couch, he had wild raven hair and deep-set eyes.

'Hello…' Mamoru (let's call her Mamoru from now on) said to him softly and he startled at her voice 'aren't you a little fuzzball….' She took her face closer to the little boy's face, which hid behind his pink sleeves and shook. Mamoru looked at him with strange eyes and then to Mr. Wammy.

'He's been like that ever since…..' he said, now sitting on the couch. Mamoru looked at the boy again, her hand went straight to the kid's fuzzy head and she slowly ruffled his hair, 'it's okay now…. You don't need to be scared…. ' but the kid did not seem to be convinced. Mamoru tried to lift his head from his arms; his lips looked chapped and shrivelled and his eyes looked droopy.

'Mr. Roger….' Mamoru slowly got up and raised her voice, as a man, younger to M. Wammy, came to her 'yes, Miss Yukimura….?'

'Do we have food in the store cupboard?'

'No…. Bob just threw everything away… I am afraid, we have nothing at the present.' Roger answered, and to reply him, Mamoru looked at him intensely; Yu could never think of exercising such authority over someone, she was an orphan, but she behaved like the lady of the household, and these men complied with her!

'Well, that's not very convincing….. Mr. Wammy-'Mamoru turned to the other man 'This kid is not being friendly not because he is scared but hungry, and it is making him cranky…' then she turned to the previous man 'Mr. Roger, at least go and warm up some milk for god's sake… we don't know when was the last time he had eaten, and bring the oatmeal cookies, Brioche I have kept in the larder …. First he will have some milk and then he is going to sleep in my room.'

She went to the kid and sat beside him, as now he was not hiding anymore n his sleeve, he was looking at Mamoru, who looked at him and smiled 'its okay….' And she hugged him softly, 'everything will be alright…..' then she fidgeted, 'you can understand me don't you?'

For the first time, the kid reacted to something, and nodded, to which Mamoru smiled. She took him up in her arms and giving the men an authoritative look she kissed the child's cheek and took him to the table…..

'What's your name sweetie?' Mamoru gently asked. But the child did not reply, but continued to stare at her with his dark, almost black, blue eyes with wide cornea, with confused and beautiful kind of appalled state. Oh, there is a sense of intellect in his eyes alright, and he is kinda handsome too…. If he were 18, I would already have fallen in love with him.

'Lawliet…..'

Lawliet?

Yu's heart pounded faster than the bullet train; Lawliet? Her mother is holding Lawliet, meaning L, in her arms?

'And apparently, that was his family name….' Roger said, as he put the glass of milk on the table 'He doesn't remember what his name was'

'He has amnesia?' Mamoru was incredulous, and as the kid in her arms was so startled at her, that she had to kiss him again and gently helped him drink the warm milk, blowing at the rim of the glass.

'Yes, I checked him myself….' Said Wammy, 'and apparently it is for a terrible shock or trauma.'

Mamoru looked at the child in her arms and her eyes moistened, perhaps he saw something hideous, or the death of his parents, poor him….

'Can you not blabber about these things in front of him?' Mamoru quietly, but firmly said, 'what is past is past…. The past did not do any good to him, but at present he is at Wammy's house, so from now on he will lead a new life…. And for that we need a new name for him….' Mamoru smiled at the kid, 'would you like a new name sweetie?'

The child nodded cutely, and Mamoru wiped the residual milk from his lips.

'As his last initial is with letter L, I suggest something with letter L too….' Mamoru said, 'anyone any ideas?'

'How about Leo, in Latin the Lion?' Mr. Wammy suggested,

'Too feral….. And doesn't suit him….'

'Leroy, the old French as King?' Roger suggested.

'mmm….. Better but kind of lacks the heart….'

'Liang, in Chinese Bright?'

'That's racist Mr. Wammy'

'What about Lorenzo? It sounds regal and it means Victory in Italian?'

'No…. reminds me of the murderer from the Spanish Tragedie' (note: The Spanish Tragedie is a play by Thomas Kyd in 16th c England)

A cold silence fell in the room, both Wammy and Roger had gave up on naming the kid, at the precise moment, Mamoru's eyes shined,

'Elijah (pronounced as: el-ee-ya)…. Hebrew for 'Jehovah is God'….. In short, El….' Mamoru whispered, 'this kid has clever and bright eyes and one day…. He will be looked for excellence, intelligence and justice….. He will be someone very special and famous.'

'Good call Miss Yukimura…..' Roger and Wammy smiled.

'Elijah….. 'El'…. from today, we'll call you El….. Elijah Lawliet…..'

But before Mamoru could see him in joy, the kid was fast asleep in her arms; she grasped him firmly and got up from her chair in the dressing gown, patting his back, she took him to her room; the child stirred.

'I am scared…..' he whispered and threw his arms around Mamoru's neck.

'It's okay El, you will be sleeping with me tonight…. There are a lot of toys and fluffy pillows, and a warm furry blanket-'

'Why did you call me L? Am I an alphabet?'

Mamoru stopped dead. She was turned down a bit, 'of course you aren't an alphabet! I called you E-L, "El" not "L" the letter' she replied irritably and looked at him from her shoulder, 'why? Don't you like it? It's short for Elijah, your new name. Every child in Wammy's house gets one when they arrive.'

'That's a weird name!' the child mumbled.

'What? Elijah is a perfectly normal name….It means God you know…. ' Mamoru pouted her lips, 'can't believe I am saying this-'

'But I like it!'

His complement made Mamoru blush. She was about to say something else too, but before that the child spoke.

'From today I will call you U….. Your name sounds with the letter U…. '

'No it doesn't….' Mamoru protested 'It sounds with "Y"…. Y-U-K-I-M-U-R-A…. Yukimura Mamoru… meaning "Protecting the Snow Village"'

A long silence is spread across the room.

'U, why a name is so important?' L asked from her arms.

'I don't know….' Mamoru answered him quietly, 'but I do think that when a child is given a name with a special meaning, at that moment with that name a purpose is given to the child…. You see, every person, no matter how small they are, has a purpose to fulfil in the world… it's like…' Mamoru sank deeper as the word 'purpose' might be too hard of a word for a little kid of barely eight to understand, 'it's like a job…. Name is like a job tag from the god that says what you will become when you grow up…. And that's why good name is very important'

'And did God tell you to give me that name?' L asked quietly.

'Maybe…. Because your name just popped in my mind…. It was God hinting what to name you. God is not someone you can touch or see, but he is out there, watching everything, listening to everything…. And because God was there, we found you…' Mamoru laid him in her bed gently and plopped his head gently to the soft pillow and started to pat him at the back. It was nearly 2:30 in the morning.

'U….'

'Yes…..'

'I can't sleep….'

Mamoru sat on her bed more determinedly and tucked her legs in the blanket, 'alright… I will sing for you….'

That exquisite melody….

That enriched Latin lyrics

Kyrie…. Ignis divine eleison….

Where did this came from in Yu's lips? How did she know it…. It was a mystery, a mystery she will never perhaps solve. Perhaps L would have no answer either. Was it dream, or a waking vision she didn't know. She never had such a feeling. But all she could see the poor child, parentless, wanting for affection and comfort. She had no mother, and having a father like that was next to none. She didn't know it was eternal or temporary, but one thing she knew: if this vision is true, then L and Yu are the same…. Alone, isolated and misunderstood. L suffered a fate which he didn't deserve neither did she…. And L was somewhere far, far away, where she will never meet him… even after death.