"You know, this is the worst fake ID I have ever seen." Andy said, glancing over the small, laminated piece of card. "You know you made yourself 68?" Brian snorted and read it over his shoulder.
"I know, I know. I goofed it."
"What do you need a fake ID for?" Andy asked.
"So I can vote." Brian said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Andrew rolled his eyes but kept on looking through his wallet.
"You wanna see what's in my bag?" Allison blurted out. Both boys looked at her, then each other, before holding their hands up simultaneously and simply saying "no" and going back to what they were doing. Allison stared at them, completely offended, before taking her bag and turning it upside down, dumping the contents on the chair between her and Brian. The boys were stunned to see an array of items. Paper, pencils, a scarf, Benders switchblade, a comb, two pairs of pastel blue underwear, some cash, socks, a lock and a large amount of tampons.
"Holy shit." Andy said, leaning over Brian to look at everything. "What is that stuff?"
"Do you always carry this much shit in your bag?" Brian asked. Allison nodded.
"Yeah. I always carry this much shit in my bag." She flipped her hair from her eyes. "You never know when you may have to jam." Brian carefully picked up a tampon that had fallen into his lap and placed it down with the others.
"Are you gonna be like, a shopping bag lady?" He asked rather rudely. "You know like, sit in alleyways, and like talk to buildings and wear men's shoes, that kind of thing?" Allison's eyes were trained on him.
"I'll do what I have to do." She said quietly.
"Why do you have to do anything?" Brian asked.
"My home life, is unsatisfying." She stated.
"So you're saying you'd subject yourself to the violent dangers, of these Chicago streets, because your home life is unsatisfying?" Brian clearly didn't understand and Allison was getting more agitated by the second. He didn't understand.
"I don't have to run away and live in the street." She protested. "I can run away and-and I can go to the ocean, I can go to the country, I can go to the mountains! I could go to Israel, Africa, Afghanistan!" She was so passionate about the subject of running away. She just wanted to be somewhere she felt comfortable, like she belonged there. Anyway but Shermer, Illinois. Anywhere was better than here, nowhere. Brian looked at Allison's tear filled eyes and merely rolled over towards Andy, who had been sat quietly in the corner with Brian's wallet still in his hand.
"Andy, you wanna get in on this?" He asked. Andrew looked between the two of them, confused. He clearly hadn't been listening. "Alison here says she wants to run away because her home life is unsatisfying." Andy looked up at her, blinking, and thought for a moment.
"Well, everyone's home life is unsatisfying." He said quietly, not wanting to upset her anymore. She just stared into his eyes, trying not to freak out over the fact Brian was basically mocking her. Andy stared right back. "If it wasn't, people would live with their parents forever."
"Yeah yeah, I understand." Brian said. "But I think her's goes beyond what, you know, guys like you and me consider normal unsatisfying." Andy fidgeted in his seat, feeling Allison's gaze start to unsettle him, especially since Brian wasn't doing a very good job of being nice towards her. He was a dick when he was high.
"Never mind. Forget it. Everything's cool." Allison said sharply, getting both boys attention again. She started packing all of her things into her bag as Andy leant forward, curious as to why she'd react like that.
"What's the deal?" He asked sincerely but she aggressively shook her head at him.
"No. There's no deal, sporto." Andy flinched. "Forget it, and leave me alone."
"Wait a minute. You're carrying all that crap around in your purse, either you really wanna run away. Or you want people to think you wanna run away." Andrew said, starting to get annoyed himself at her tone. He never meant any harm, he was genuinely concerned. But this girl was hell bent on pulling people in and pushing them out the moment they started to get somewhere.
"Eat. Shit." Allison spat and rushed off to the desk across from them, leaving her bag behind and leaning over the counter, her head down and her hair cascading over it. She didn't want any of them to see her upset. She was too embarrassed already.
"The girl is an island in herself." Brian said before rifling through her things that were still dumped out next to him. Andrew stood up and threw Brian's Wallet at him before storming off to talk to Allison, fed up with him once again. He quietly stood opposite her, leaning against the desk and watching as she brought her head up to glare at him. Her eyes were red and brimming with tears and his heart clenched in his chest. He did this, partially. He made this girl feel bad. But there was something he was missing, and for some reason he was determined to find out what it was.
"Hi." He said, almost ashamed that he had to come up here and talk to her after how he acted. "You wanna talk?"
"No." Allison replied almost instantly.
"Why not?" He asked. After a long pause, Allison moved closer.
"Go away." Andy shrugged at her.
"Where do you want me to go?"
"Go, away!" The two stared each other down, Andy's jaw clenching in anger whilst Allison's lip started to quiver. Eventually, Andrew pushed himself away from the desk and turned his back on her, slowly walking away to sit on his own. That's when a spark of courage ran through Allison's veins and she got up to walk after him, holding the desk for support as if at any moment she would tumble to the floor. "You have problems!" She said loudly and Andy spun around to face her, face already pink from how angry he was starting to get.
"Oh, I have problems?" He retorted.
"You do everything everybody tells you to do, THAT is a problem!" Allison cried, flinging her arm out dramatically. Andrew nodded, grinding his teeth.
"Okay fine, but I didn't dump my purse out on the couch and invite people into my problems!" Allison's mouth fell open, no longer knowing how else to respond to him. Andy took a few steps forward, closing the tension filled gap between them. "Did I?" He asked. As he stood there, watching her expression change slowly from anger to fear to sadness, his own face began to soften. "So what's wrong?" His voice was quieter this time, more sincere, and Allison almost told him everything. Almost. "What is it? Is it bad?" Allison looked away and Andy let out a sigh. "Real bad? Parents?" At that she looked back at him, but he was already looking down at his feet and leaning his back on the desk. After a moment of contemplation, Andrew gazed up at her again.
"Yeah." Her voice cracked as she nodded. Andy's heart was pounding.
"What do they do to you?" He whispered.
"They ignore me." Allison breathed out. Andrew could only nod whilst trying to blink back tears.
"Yeah. Yeah."
Bender and Molly were upstairs, Bender leaning against a pillar and Molly lying on her side looking up at him. They had moved once Claire decided to touch up her makeup and Brian had gone off to finish his lunch, suddenly feeling really hungry. Molly watched as Allison and Andy spoke to one another and she tried to read their lips, curious as to what they were saying.
"What do you think they're talking about?" She asked. Bender barely glanced in their direction before turning his attention back to his box of matches.
"Sex, maybe." He joked, earning a look fro Molly. "What? Sporto's clearly into the crazies."
"Don't call her that." Molly insisted, flicking his ankle. "She's not crazy."
"You would know?" He smirked. Molly just shook her head. She watched Andy lean against the desk and continuously gaze at Allison and she wondered if he had known anything about her until today. Who she was, her name, her classes. Probably not. None of them really knew each other until then. She had seen Claire around the school with her posse of friends, and sometimes saw Brian and his friends in the computer lab. She had once spoken to Andy during History, but that was only to ask if he had a spare pencil. One of her band mates knew some of Bender's friends and she had occasionally seen them hang around the bar they played at most weekends, and she had seen Allison sat on the bleachers drawing or just sat there, watching everyone. A part of her felt bad for never getting to know her, seeing as she didn't seem to have any other friends, Molly could have taken her under her wing. But she was so used to being a loner that making friends hadn't been in her mind since Freshman year.
"Where did Vernon put you, anyway?" Molly asked. Bender didn't reply. "You crawled through the ceiling," she laughed, still surprised that Vernon hadn't seen the missing tile yet, "it must have been pretty bad."
"Some closet." He said. "It was cramped, I needed to stretch my legs."
"So go out the front door?"
"It was locked." Molly propped herself up on elbows.
"Vernon locked the door?" She asked. Bender looked up at her.
"Is there a problem with an adult abusing his power over his students?" He joked. Molly didn't laugh but instead scoffed at him and lied down properly, resting one arm on her stomach whilst putting the other behind her head. Bender watched her cross one leg over the other and wished he didn't have the urge to run his fingers absentmindedly over her thighs.
"He's such a...you know that he...ugh!" She kicked her heel against the carpet and Bender tried to hide his smile behind his shaggy hair. "He can't really think he can get away with that, can he? I mean, what teacher does that to a kid. Just locks them in a closet for 4 hours. Prick."
"Does it look like I'm in a closet?" Bender asked. Molly looked over at him. "No. So stop freaking." He went back to lighting matches and stubbing them out onto the pillar, leaving tiny burn marks on the crisp white paint. "Why do you keep sticking up for me, anyway?"
Molly shrugged. "It's the right thing to do?"
"They don't think it's the right thing to do." He nodded at everyone downstairs. "In fact, they'd rather watch me go down than walk out of here unscathed."
"They aren't that bad-"
"Maybe your precious Johnson isn't." Bender bit back, sarcasm dripping from his voce. "But Clarke wanted me to drop dead the moment I walked in here." Molly bit her lip.
"He's not mine." She said softly. Bender's head snapped towards her.
"Right, and Claire isn't a virgin."
"Will you stop being such an ass? For once, could you just keep your shitty opinions to yourself." She didn't mean to sound so harsh, but seeing Claire squirm under his scrutiny was still imprinted in her memory.
"Feisty." Bender replied. "Bet Bri will love that." Molly pushed herself up onto her palms and kicked out her foot to strike Benders leg, but didn't expect him to grab her ankle just before it made contact with his thigh. She gasped under her breath as the two held eye contact for a long time. Bender eventually shoved her leg to the ground, causing her to stumble onto her side. "Don't even try it."
"Or what, you gonna hit me?" Molly challenged. Something was screaming in her head to stop, to just lie back down and forget this conversation ever happened, but something about John made her want to argue back. To stand up for herself. And it scared her yet excited her all at once.
"You're boring me Foster, go back to the whole 'quiet girl in the corner' act for me, would you?" John taunted and Molly pulled herself to her knees.
"My god, you're infuriating." She scoffed. "You really think being a giant dick will get you through life? Get you a girl? A good job?"
"I don't need any of those things to be happy, you know." He bit back. "I just need to do what I gotta do, and that's that."
"And that's what, exactly? Making everyone feel like total shit for being themselves?"
"What do you care? You're just like the rest of them, too ignorant to see the real world for what it is." John leant forward and threw the match box to the side. "You're in your own little bubble of hypocrisy and you can't even see it."
"What the hell are you talking about?" Molly demanded.
"You make the dweeb feel like he's nothing to you! He wants to be something but you keep pushing him away, and for what, to get to me? Well you can forget it, Foster. I'm not interested." John folded his arms and sat back as Molly's face flushed red. "Oh go ahead, yell, scream, cry, whatever. Don't bother wasting my time like Brian wastes his on you."
"Fuck you!" Molly didn't realise her hand flew out to slap him until she felt Bender's strong hand wrap around her wrist only a few inches from his cheek. Her eyes were blurry with tears but she could see that her hands were trembling and that John had a look of surprise on his face, clearly not expecting her to try and hit him. Suddenly, he dragged her forward by her arm and she gasped as she was pulled into his lap. Her other arm grabbing his shoulder to steady herself as her torso fell between his legs, resting against his chest. His gaze softened after a few quiet seconds and she noticed his adam's apple bob up and down as he gulped.
"Thought I told you not to try it." He whispered. Molly was locked onto his eyes as if she was hypnotised and could barely even blink. They were such a pretty shade of brown, almost gold under the fluorescent lighting.
"I thought I told you not to be an ass." She whispered back. Instead of getting angry, Bender smiled. The most genuine smile he had given her so far.
"Touche." His grip on her wrist loosened and he carefully pulled her closer to him. Molly didn't dare breath as his thumb hooked under her chin, stroking the soft skin, before his gaze slid down to her lips. "Did you really hate what I did under the table?" He asked. Molly paused then nodded her head.
"No." She said with a smirk at the same time and Bender's eyes brightened.
"Thought as much. I felt you trembling."
"Would you quit it?" She asked, yet her soft voice didn't match her rude words. Bender just chuckled.
"Trust me, the world would be a lot more boring if I quit it."
"My life would be easier." Molly teased and Bender gently reached out, an action that was completely foreign to him, to tuck a stray piece of hair from Molly's face behind her ear.
"I'd still find a way to bother you." He said. "I saw you, remember." She rolled her eyes.
"I smoke, big deal." She replied.
"That's not what I meant." John said. Molly blinked up at him.
"Then what did you mean?" She asked him quietly, and in that moment John tried desperately not to kiss her.
"That I-"
"Please, get a room you two." They both turned to see Claire making her way up the steps, Andy, Brian and Allison close behind her. Allison gave Molly a small smile as she sat beside Bender, tucking her knees under her chin. Andrew looked slightly disgusted but didn't say a word, sitting diagonally to where Claire now was, stretching her legs and sitting up right against the pillar opposite Bender and Molly. Brian was the last to be seated, trying to hide his uncomfortable expression at the sight of Molly and John by hanging his head and sitting beside Andy. Molly quickly got up and went back to sitting next to John, not realising until a few minutes later, with Claire and Andrew talking about something she had no interest in, that Bender's knee was grazing hers.
"What would I do for a million bucks?" Andrew asked, directing the question to Claire. He thought for a moment and rubbed his forearm before smiling. "I guess I'd uh...I'd do as little as I had to." Claire rolled her eyes.
"That's boring." She said. Neither of them seemed to notice the other four kids tired expressions. Bender was staring into space, Brian was yawning, Allison was looking at her jagged nails, and Molly was almost falling asleep, her head lolling off of her outstretched palm and her eyes drooping shut every few seconds. She could kill for a bed right now, or at least a pillow to rest her head on. John's shoulder looked comfortable enough…Molly shook her head and sat up straighter, trying to hide her pink cheeks.
"Well, how else am I supposed to answer?" Andy asked. Claire laughed.
"The idea is to like search your mind for the absolute limit." She explained. "Like um...would you drive to school naked?" Andrew burst into a fit of giggles, imagining the insane, and totally extreme, situation of having to get into his old man's pick up truck and drive around without a care in the world that if anyone happened to look through his window, they'd be met with a stark naked Andrew Clarke; wrestling champion turned nudist.
"Um, uh, would I have to get out of the car?" He asked.
"Of course." Allison watched the two of them, not sure whether to join in or not. She still didn't feel all that welcome, but it's not like they were telling her to leave.
"In the Spring? Or Winter?"
"Doesn't matter. Spring."
"In the front of the school, or the back of the school?" John could imagine himself literally anywhere else but that library. His bedroom, the bleachers, the bar, christ, even Australia. He would be happier across the word than here listening to these two. But he couldn't go anywhere else, he had to stay here in this boring library. Molly was staring at him, so he stared right back.
"Either one." Brian checked his watch and sighed. Still way too long until he had to go home.
"Yes." Andrew said after a pause and Claire stared at him in shock but he shrugged.
"I'd do that." Allison spoke up, earning everyone's attention, even Bender and Molly turned to look at her. "I'll do anything sexual, and I don't need a million dollars to do it either." Claire frowned at her.
"You're lying." She stated. Molly raised her eyebrow at the two of them but Allison stood her ground.
"I already have." She said. "I've done just about everything there is, except a few things that are illegal." Andrew was smiling at her and Molly watched him through narrow eyes. What was he suddenly so happy about? Brian sat up so his back was against the railing and licked his lips, clearly trying to process what he was hearing. Bender just looked on. Allison leant forward towards Claire and smirked, her eyes filled with mischief. "I'm a nymphomaniac." She said slyly.
Claire still looked unimpressed. "Lie." She said simply, looking away. Brian stared at Allison in complete disbelief.
"Are your parents aware of this?" He asked. Allison shrugged.
"The only person I told was my shrink." She said glumly, as if ashamed to admit she saw someone. Molly suddenly got flashbacks to seeing her therapist years ago, having to sit there feeling judged and analysed just because she felt sad sometimes. It was horrible, but it did seem to help her in the long run.
"What did he do when you told him?" Andrew asked, curiously. Allison grinned.
"He nailed me." Molly snorted and Bender's eyes flickered down to her. She bit her lip. Andrew gulped and looked away whilst Brian started smiling to himself. Pervert, Molly thought to herself and smirked at him. Claire on the other hand looked disgusted.
"Very nice." She drawled.
"I don't think, that from a legal standpoint, what he did can be construed as rape because I paid him." Allison said softly. That just set Claire off even more, her nose turning up and her mouth morphed into a grimace.
"He's an adult!" She spat.
"Yeah." Allison replied. "He's married too." Molly laughed again and Brian and Bender joined in, leaving Andrew to both look and feel uncomfortable and Claire to shudder in her seat.
"Ugh! Do you have any idea how completely gross that is?" She asked.
"For the first few times-"
"First few times?!" Claire exclaimed. "You mean you did it more than once?!"
"Sure." Allison nodded.
"Are you crazy?" Claire demanded.
"Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing a shrink." Brian said as if it was obvious. Molly reached over to flick his knee.
"Stop calling her crazy. Leave her be." She said. Brian fidgeted a little under her gaze. Claire shook her head at all of them.
"Have you ever done it?" Allison asked slowly, leaning forward again to get a good look at Claire's shocked face, clearly not expecting the attention to suddenly be directed at her. Claire paused as everyone's eyes were trained on her and looked away.
"I don't even have a psychiatrist." She said.
"Have you ever done it with a normal person, is what she means." Molly explained. Claire pursed her lips and Molly could instantly tell where this was going. She looked scared, scared to admit whatever the truth was.
"Didn't we already cover this?" Claire asked Bender, who had been silent throughout the entire conversation.
"You never answered the question." He replied.
"Look, I'm not gonna discuss my private life with total strangers." Claire stated.
"It's kind of a double edged sword, isn't it?" Allison said. Molly let her legs stretch out in front of her, no longer letting them touch Bender's leg. She noticed him shift against the pillar at the loss of contact and she felt her heart speed up.
"What is?" She asked.
"Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. But if you say you have, you're a slut." Allison explained. Molly quickly looked away at the mention of the word slut. She hated it, hated it with everything she had, because she had been called it so many times in the past. "It's a trap." Allison continued, "you want too, and you can't. And when you do, you wish you didn't, right?"
"Wrong." Claire remarked, shaking her head.
"Or, are you a tease?" Allison questioned. Silence.
"She's a tease." Andrew said. Molly scoffed.
"Oh sure, why don't you just forget it?" Claire folded her arms with a huff.
"You're a tease and you know it, all girls are teases."
"Nice generalising there." Molly commented and Andrew gave her a look. "You don't know how many girls are teases, not for sure."
"I can make a rough guess." He said.
"You're only a tease if what she does gets you hot." Bender added in and both Claire and Molly looked up at him. He only looked back at Molly. Brian swallowed the lump in his throat across from them, watching as Molly shifted around, moving to lean on her left palm instead of her right. She was getting uncomfortable, he could tell. He didn't blame her.
"I don't do anything!" Claire snapped, having enough of all the judging.
"That's why, you're a tease." Allison grinned. Claire turned all of her attention onto her.
"Okay, well let me ask you a few questions." She said. Allison laughed at her.
"I already told you everything!" She said but Claire had already had enough.
"No. Doesn't it bother you to sleep around without being in love, I mean don't you want any respect?" Bender's head shot up and, to Brian's surprise and disappointment, so did Molly's. Neither of the really knew it, but they both had some pretty questionable histories. The two hadn't heard anyone judge somebody for sleeping around, with the exception of Molly's mother who was a little too conservative for Molly's liking.
"I don't screw to get respect, that's the difference between you and me." Allison replied.
"It's not the only difference I hope." Claire turned her nose up at her and Molly practically snarled.
"So what if people sleep around?" Molly spat at her, earning her a startled expression in return. "Who are you to judge, anyway? It's not your life."
"I'm saying what I think, there's nothing wrong with that either." Claire defended herself. "I don't see why you'd be with more than one person."
"Just face it, you're a tease." Bender said slowly, clearly bored of the conversation already.
"I'm not a tease!"
"Sure you are." He said. "Sex is your weapon, you said so yourself. You use it to get respect." Claire was baffled for a second but shook her head.
"No, I never said that, she twisted my words around!"
"What do you use it for then?" Molly asked, leaning back so her spine was against John's leg. The two felt powerful, both feeling like they had to not only defend each other, but themselves. Who cares what they did in their private time? They didn't deserve to get judged by some prim and proper little girl.
"I don't use it, period!" Claire insisted, but John was clearly only just starting to have fun with this.
"Oh are you, medically frigid or is it psychological?" He teased. Claire shook her head again, closing her eyes in order to calm herself down.
"I didn't mean it that way! You guys are putting words into my mouth!" She whined.
"Well, if you just answered the question." Bender stated.
Molly started to realise where the conversation was about to head. She shared a look with Allison as the other boys started to take an interest.
"Why don't you just answer the question?" Brian asked.
"Come on, be honest." Andy chimed in.
"It's no big deal," Bender said slyly. "Just answer it."
"Yeah, answer."
"Come on, answer the question Claire."
"Be honest with us."
"Talk to us!" As the boys started rallying behind one another, each of the girls shared scared looks. Claire looked ready to burst into tears and Molly started to feel bad about raising her voice. She tried to motion to Bender and Brian and Andy but they all ignored her. Allison started to look guilty herself. Eventually, Claire snapped.
"No! I never did it!" She shouted. Everyone went quiet. Molly was glaring at all the boys whilst Claire turned her head so no one could see her eyes fill with tears. She didn't want to admit that, not to them, total strangers who had judged her, bullied her...she hated them. She hated the situation and all she wanted was to go home and cry into her Dad's arms.
"I never did it either." Allison said quietly. Everyone stared at her and Claire's face was livid. "I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar." Brian stared at her in shock as Claire's cheeks flared a bright red.
"You are such a bitch!" She spat, her words laced with venom. "You did that on purpose just to fuck me over!"
"I would do it though." Allison said to the group, ignoring Claire's harsh words. "If you love someone it's okay." Her eyes met with Andrew's as she said that, whereas Molly didn't know whether to lock eyes with Brian or John. Either way, they both stared at her. If you love someone it's okay.
