Chapter 6: Playing Coy

Anakin could not believe his luck. He must be dreaming and as he adjusted the luggage in his hands he gave himself a slight pinch. That hurt. I cannot believe this is happening; Anakin thought to himself. It took every ounce of control that he possessed to keep him from leaping for joy as they made their way towards the refugee transport. Now more than ever it was important for him to appear professional. He desperately wanted to make an impression on Padmé.

Anakin was relieved that Obi-Wan had refrained from delivering one of his signature full-blown lectures before allowing Anakin to leave with the senator. That would have been the worst thing his mentor could have done and Anakin would have been tempted to never forgive Obi-Wan. It had amused him to see that Padmé received the same treatment from her handmaiden. It had never occurred to Anakin that the senator would ever do anything to warrant a lecture about her safety. Perhaps he should have known better.

Lyyr's behavior puzzled him, but then again Lyyr had always managed to puzzle him at times. He had thought that she would have greeted him with more enthusiasm after ten years apart. Granted she had seemed preoccupied at the time and it took her a moment before she recognized him, but still it was a lackluster reunion. Nothing at all like the reunion he had imagined. Just like his reunion with Padmé had not gone according to his imaginings.

On principle Anakin tried not to dwell on any predicaments Lyyr could (and would) present. His sister was a difficult woman to get to know – let alone try to understand – Anakin was well aware of that and he did not envy Obi-Wan that aspect of his mission. Sometimes he believed that he only understood Lyyr as well as he did because she allowed him too, he doubted that she would ever cease to surprise him.

He spared a brief moment of thought to wonder how Lyyr and Obi-Wan would get along. Anakin knew that Obi-Wan wanted to befriend Lyyr. There were a variety of reason's why Obi-Wan was so interested in becoming friends, Anakin knew (or at lest thought he knew) all of them. It made since that sense Lyyr was Anakin's family that Obi-Wan would want to at least be on friendly terms with her. But the older Jedi was convinced that he was the only person who could give Lyyr an accurate impression of her parents, particularly her father. Moreover, he was stuck on the idea that he owed Lyyr an apology.

Anakin did not see how or why Obi-Wan would need to apologize to his sister. Yet he knew that his mentor was convinced he had to because of how often Obi-Wan had mentioned it to Anakin. If Anakin had paid any kind of attention to anyone else's feelings other than his own in the past few years; he would have realized that Obi-Wan mentioned Lyyr just as often as Anakin mentioned Padmé. Even as the thought occurred to him Anakin dismissed it as ridiculous. Obi-Wan cannot possible think of Lyyr like I do of Padmé. Anakin thought in utter disbelief. Quickly he dismissed it from his mind. He did not want to waste his time musing about Lyyr and Obi-Wan, not when he had been granted basically unlimited access to Padmé. At that mental reminder he focused on the woman sitting across from him.

"I look forward to seeing Naboo again," Anakin said trying to start a conversation. "I've thought about it every day since I left. It's by far the most beautiful place I've ever seen..," he floundered then loosing his nerve when she did not make an immediate response.

"It may not be as you remember it, time changes perception." She finally answered. Anakin sensed that in some way she was trying to discourage him, warn him of something.

"Sometimes it does," he responded to that unspoken challenge, "sometimes for the better."

"It must be difficult having sworn your life to the Jedi," she said. Anakin stiffened at that almost interrupting her but at the last second he decided to hear her out. "Not being able to visit the places you like or do the things you like…"

"Or be with the people I love," Anakin interjected deciding not to play coy.

"Are you allowed to love? I thought it was forbidden for a Jedi," Padmé challenged.

"Attachment is forbidden, possession is forbidden," Anakin clarified. "Compassion, which I would define as an unconditional love, is central to a Jedi's life. One might even say that we are encouraged to love."

"You have changed so much."

"You haven't changed a bit, you are exactly the way I remember you in my dreams," he blurted without thinking. Then tried to laugh it off even as he ducked his head to hide his blushing; he hoped he had not just made a fool out of himself. She was kind enough to laugh along with him, at least that's what he thought she was doing and he wasn't about to question it.


Obi-Wan was left without answers, at least none to his original questions, as Jocasta Nu went on to assist others. He turned to Lyyr and with a slight jerk of his head motioned for her to follow him. He waited until they were out of the Archives before saying anything to Lyyr.

"I apologize for Master Nu's behavior," Obi-Wan began after subconsciously clearing his throat. He would have continued to say more but she interrupted him changing what he assumed the course of the conversation would become.

"If anyone owes me an apology it is Master Nu herself."

"I had thought and Master Windu gave me the impression that the Archivist often welcomed your help."

"She did," Lyyr acknowledged. "At least until I made the unfortunate mistake of correcting her during one of her classes. To compound my mistake it was done in front of an audience of Jedi Master's searching for their perspective padawans."

"That was not wisely done."

"It was done without thinking," Lyyr admitted. "I apologized at the first chance I had but apparently that was not enough."

"That still gives her no right to use your mother's transgressions in an attempt to shame you." To his surprise Lyyr laughed at that. It was a bitter laugh which surprised him even more.

"What a polite way to tell me she preferred I did not exist."

"Why does she only blame your mother? Surely without Qui-Gon" – he began but was cut short when Lyyr unexpectedly grabbed his arm and dove into an alcove.

"Lyyr what the Force!" He exclaimed in surprise.

"Do not discuss the identity of my father in public." She ordered him; the tone in her voice making it clear that she would not tolerate any arguments.

"Why not? Do you want to ignore the fact that Qui-Gon is your father? Are you trying to deny your heritage?" Obi-Wan demanded enraged at the thought that she would renounce Qui-Gon.

"I am not denying anything." She snapped back. "It is not common knowledge that Qui-Gon is my father and I would like to keep it that way. What's more Master Yoda thought it best to leave Qui-Gon's involvement quite. Outside of the council and myself you and Anakin are the only ones who know." She explained her voice becoming dispassionate and her mannerism less animated. He sensed that she was trying to explain things in a rational manner.

"I don't understand, why wouldn't you want anyone to know?"

"So they can slander my father as well as my mother? It is all I can do not to lose my temper I come across them talking about Veira behind my back. As if that is not bad enough many don't bother to make an attempt at tact and discuss their disapproval of my mother in front of me. I could not bear to listen to them slander Qui-Gon."

Obi-Wan blinked at her rather owlishly. That had been the most impassioned speech he had heard her make since he found her with those smugglers. He was reminded of the old saying of 'still waters run deep' and in that moment he had a flash of insight into Lyyr's character. She went about gruff and aloof barely showing an ounce of emotion to cover how deeply she truly felt things. For a moment he wondered if her enforced separation from Anakin had affected her more deeply than she let on.

"I was not aware"…

"How could you have been? I have only seen you only a handful of times in the past ten years. What's more, you never stayed longer than necessary. Long enough to be patched up and receive the next assignment. How could you have heard let alone notice the insidious gossip."

"Enlighten me," he suggested. She shook her head in the negative. Obi-Wan felt a pang of concern for her and rested his hand on her shoulder in what he hoped was a comforting gesture. Her violet eyes soften for one moment becoming a deep shade of lavender.

"I am sorry Lyyr." That was the wrong thing to say for her eyes hardened into violet stones once more.

"You keep apologizing Obi-Wan when there is no need for you to," she informed him removing his hand from her shoulder. "Come if you wish to consult Master Yoda about our missing planet we should find him now." Lyyr said leaving the alcove.

Obi-Wan followed her and had walked about five feet before he realized that he had never mentioned his idea of consulting Master Yoda with Lyyr.


They found Yoda on the training veranda with a class of roughly twenty younglings. They all wore helmets with the visors down, obscuring their vision and in their hands were miniature lightsabers. Training droids danced in front of them occasionally firing a stunning bolt for the younglings to try and deflect. Lyyr smiled in memory of her first day at that particular exercise. She had managed to get more than one bolt to the arse that day.

Obi-Wan entered the veranda apologizing to Yoda for interrupting his class. Lyyr followed at a more discreet distance. A few of the children nodded at Lyyr in greeting. She returned their greeting with a soft smile and a nod of her own. Lyyr made a point of interacting with any and all of the younglings whenever she encountered them. As a result she had quickly become a favorite amongst them and more often than not younglings sought her out.

"Lost a planet, Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing…how embarrassing," Lyyr chuckled along with the children at that, "an interesting puzzle. Gather, younglings, around the map reader. Clear your minds and find Obi-Wan's wayward planet, we will."

Obi-Wan activated the map reader then stepped into the display until he was at the point they expected Kamino to be.

"This is where it ought to be…but it isn't. Gravity is pulling all the stars in this area inward to this spot."

"Most interesting, gravity's silhouette remains, but the star and all its planets have disappeared. How can this be? An answer? A thought? Anyone?"

Lyyr waited with baited breath to see who would provide the answer she was beginning to suspect. Eventually one of the children raised his hand and Master Yoda gave him permission to speak.

"Master? Because someone erased it from the archive memory," Yoda chuckled at that and Lyyr smiled encouragingly at the youngling.

"Truly wonderful, the mind of a child is. The padwan is right, go to the center of gravity's pull and find your planet you will."

That was the end of his class he left with Obi-Wan and Lyyr joined them. They were alone in an adjoining room before Obi-Wan spoke up once more.

"Who could have erased information from the archives?"

"Dangerous and disturbing this puzzle is," Yoda replied with a frown. "Only a Jedi could have erased those files; but who and why, harder to answer. Meditate on this, I will. May the Force be with you."

Obi-Wan bowed in acceptance of Yoda's decision. Father now is your chance, she sent out to the lingering spirit in hope that he would use this opportunity to make contact with Yoda. Thinking they had been dismissed Obi-Wan left and Lyyr moved to follow but Yoda stopped her.

"Great pain I sense in you," he stated bluntly regarding her calmly with those green eyes.

"Master?"

"Play coy with me, you will not. Control your feelings, is what you should do."

"I have control Master Yoda."

"If true that is, then let go of the pain you would."

"Master I appreciate your concern but it is unnecessary." Lyyr told him shortly giving him a brief respectful bow before leaving.

Yoda watched her go, shaking her head before sighing.

"To proud is she," he murmured to himself.

"Prideful she may be, but arrogant she is not."