Thank you all again, so much for reading and following and reviewing. I am loving writing this story and I'm so happy that people are enjoying reading it. I've listed the songs I've mentioned throughout this story so far at the end of this chapter (mostly because they're so good.) I don't own glee or the characters in this story.
Ch.7 Anyone Who Had a Heart
Finn was walking home quickly. He glanced around a lot, with his hands shoved deep into his pockets. He didn't have the protection of Kurt's car today. Kurt had rushed off to Dalton, to see Blaine in a concert and all Finn could think about was how badly he wished it was him. Finn's piece of junk car had broken down a couple of months ago, but he still hadn't gotten around to getting to the garage to fix it. Burt had offered to have a look, but Finn declined, he liked doing it himself, but he kicked himself now for not letting Burt help him. As he was walking, a car pulled up alongside him, and he was fully prepared to have to take a slushie to the face or even a couple of punches.
Finn heard the electric windows lower and tightened his body.
"Want a ride?" Quinn's voice emerged from inside the car. Finn unclenched his body and turned around.
"Thanks, but I'm almost home." He said a little awkwardly, pointing towards the direction of his house. He only had a couple more blocks to walk and he would be there.
"Get in." Quinn said, sternly. Finn did as he was told. He sat low in the passenger seat so Quinn could see all of her mirrors properly.
They shared a little small talk for a few minutes about regionals until they pulled up outside of Finn's house. The ride had been pretty pointless, but he liked talking to Quinn and she had been a good friend to him. Finn was just about to swing the door open when Quinn spoke up to stop him.
"Finn…I wanted to talk to you about something." She said, her hands falling from the steering wheel and into her lap. Finn closed the door and sat back in his seat again, looking at her with a reassuring smile on his face.
"I know you're having a hard time at school..." She paused, drawing in breath and Finn looked at her now with his eyebrows knitted in confusion.
"…and I think, considering our past, you and I should maybe get back together."
Before the party that was everything Finn wanted. Sam and Quinn had broken up, and Finn wanted a chance to be with her, but then everything with Blaine meant it didn't work out. Finn was speechless. He tried to form a sentence that would say no, but also make it clear that it wasn't because he had feelings for Blaine, or that he didn't like Quinn.
"I mean, you loved the way I sang in Glee today." She said, twisting her body to look at him. "Not that it was at you of course." She began to feel a little flustered. "I just think that if we got back together, we could both benefit from it."
Finn slowly nodded. "Can I get back to you on this?" He said, looking around the car a little to avoid Quinn's eyes.
She stared at him for a moment longer, and then her face switched from serious to a friendly smile. "Sure." She nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow."
He nodded back and got out of the car and walked slowly towards his house, feeling utterly confused about what had just happened, and what he needed to do about it.
Kurt arrived at Dalton a little after six. He followed a couple, who he assumed were someone's parents as they got out of their huge Hummer and went into the building. Kurt had never really been to Dalton before so had no idea where he was going. When they reached the auditorium, there was a boy in Dalton uniform sitting at a desk.
"Kurt Hummel?" Kurt said after the other two people had given their names and entered the double doors to take their seats.
"Oh, you must be Blaine's better half." The slender boy smiled at him. Kurt nodded and smiled back, a little confusion on his face. Oh God, was he meant to know this guy? Was tonight going to be full of people he'd vaguely met wearing Dalton uniforms, but couldn't put a name to? He couldn't pretend he knew all of them, but would it be rude to ask their names? He just stood, smiling, for moment.
"Sorry, I'm Sebastian, Blaine's roommate." He held out a hand to shake, and Kurt obliged.
It clicked in Kurt's mind and he remembered, 'Bas' as Blaine called him.
"Oh! Of course!" Kurt responded. "I'm sorry, I'm a little bad with names and faces and… well everything really." He said, half laughing.
Sebastian smiled warmly at him.
"Here, you're the last to arrive, I'll show you to your seat." He led Kurt to a seat in the aisle.
"Thank you so much." Kurt whispered, trying not to disturb the rest of the people in there. Blaine had said it would be small and intimate, in reality, the auditorium was packed. It was like going to an actual concert, not just a warm-up for a show choir competition. The lights went down and Kurt beamed when his boyfriend bounded on stage to sing. All through-out the performance, Kurt made mental notes to relay to Blaine, but most of the time, he just stared open mouthed at his boyfriend and how amazing he looked and how talented he was.
Afterwards, Kurt was quickly re-introduced to most of the warblers and then they bundled into Kurt's car to go and get food. Blaine was on a high from his performance, talking quickly and shuffling around as Kurt drove them to a diner a few blocks away.
When they arrived they went into the 50's style place that Blaine loved so much. He went there fairly often with friends or if his parents or brother came for a quick visit, and his gelled hair and bow-ties always made him fit in like a piece of 50's memorabilia. The waitresses knew him quite well, they were on first name terms, so when he held the door open for Kurt, and was greeted by Patricia with a wide grin and "Hey Blaine- sweety!" Kurt was sort of surprised.
"You come here a lot?" Kurt asked through the side of his mouth as they sat in a booth and took their jackets off.
"Yes, probably once a week." Blaine replied, folding his jacket in half and placing it down gently beside him. "The milkshakes are the best." He smiled at his boyfriend.
"What did you think of the performance anyway?" Blaine put his elbows on the table and placed his hands under his chin.
"You were great." Kurt smiled. "You guys are so infectious."
Patricia walked over and stood by the table. "How are you sweety? Been anywhere nice?" She gently placed her hand on Blaine's shoulder.
"I was singing at my school. Regionals is soon." He looked up at her and she nodded knowingly.
"I remember you saying. How did it go?" She asked, smiling at him. Blaine pointed to Kurt.
"I guess it's best to ask someone who saw it. This is my boyfriend, Kurt."
She turned her head to smile at Kurt and he smiled bashfully back.
"He was great, really great." Blaine reached across the table to hold Kurt's hand.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, cutie!" Patricia was one of the most genuinely enthusiastic people Kurt had ever met. But something about her made him feel uneasy. It wasn't the way she looked, her auburn hair and blue eyes actually made her look quite beautiful. Maybe he was a little intimidated by how well she knew Blaine, but Kurt didn't know her. He'd never mentioned this place before, but if he came here once a week, surely it would have popped up in conversation.
"And Blaine, I'm glad it went so well. I'll have to come and see you perform sometime. Anyway, I won't interrupt you anymore. What can I get you kids?" She slipped a small pad and pen out of the front of her apron.
"I'll just have a burger and strawberry shake please." Blaine looked up at her and smiled sweetly.
"Me too." Kurt said when she looked at him.
"Great. Shouldn't be long." She looked at them both again, smiling and walked away.
"So, what was your favourite song?" Blaine asked, fiddling with Kurt's fingers.
"Oh I think my favourites are the upbeat ones, like Pink and the Boyband ones."
"I'm sorry…" Blaine gave a shy smile. "I don't want to bore you by talking about it. How are your regional practices going?" Blaine asked feeling a little deflated that Kurt wasn't feeling as enthusiastic as he was. He put it down to the high of performing and listened to Kurt talk about his solo and who else had performed. He complimented Kurt in the right places, saying he was sure he was a shoe-in for a solo. He knew all of the songs Kurt mentioned, apart from the one Quinn and Santana performed.
"How does that one go?" He interjected, forcing Kurt to a sing a couple of lines to jog his memory.
"Oh I love that one. Although I don't think I've ever heard Quinn sing a solo." Blaine took a gulp of his milkshake.
"It was very good. Someone else liked it a lot too." Kurt said as Patricia approached and placed their plates down.
Blaine looked up at her. "Wonderful. Thank you." He smiled and she winked at him and walked away. He looked back to Kurt and continued their conversation.
"I'm sure Mr Schuester liked it, but I doubt it was as good as you."
"Oh no, I meant Finn. I think something might be going on between them." Kurt raised his eyebrows.
Blaine's heart dropped into his feet. He made a surprised like noise, nodding and trying hard to swallow the bite of food clinging to his dry throat.
"That's great." Blaine said when he finally managed to speak.
"I know…" Kurt smiled. "I'm glad he's moving on. He's had a hard time…with all of this." Kurt shook his head a little, but then a smile quickly reappeared on his face. "I watched Coco before Chanel last night."
Blaine let his boyfriend talk, explaining the ins and outs of the movie and then changing the subject to other things. Blaine ate a little more of his food amongst nodding and smiling and answering and asking questions, but most of it was just spread around the plate.
"Are you okay?" Kurt asked after finishing their food and noticing Blaine hadn't really eaten much.
"I'm great." Blaine forced a smile. "I'm just tired. It's been a long day."
"I call it PPCD, Post-Performance-Come-Down." Kurt smiled sympathetically and Blaine laughed a little.
"Let's get you home." Kurt paid their bill after shoving Blaine's wallet back into his pocket three times, and then drove him back to Dalton. They pulled into the stony driveway of Dalton, right outside the main entrance. Blaine had to be inside in 6 minutes, or he would get a disciplinary, and there was a teacher, lurking by the door, making sure everyone who had signed out for the evening was back.
"I guess you're staying at Dalton this weekend?" Kurt asked and Blaine nodded.
"How about I come to yours? What time does Glee end on Saturday?" Blaine asked, making a mental note of Kurt's 2PM response.
"I'll come over, we can watch a movie or something." Blaine undid his seatbelt and opened the car door before leaning over to give Kurt a kiss on the cheek. He got out and waved as Kurt pulled away, then ran to the door and set foot inside 30 seconds before the teacher slammed the door shut, forcing any late-comers to ring the bell.
Blaine trudged back up the grand staircase and began the fairly long walk to his dorm on the other side of school. He hated himself for feeling so hurt that Finn was moving on. It was none of his business anyway. Finn didn't want anything more to do with him and Kurt was happy so Blaine should be happy. But the thought of Quinn's hands running through Finn's hair made Blaine's stomach turn. He began to hum to himself as he speeded up his pace, trying to get thoughts of Finn out of his head. What he really needed was something to punch, to get rid of some of the aggression he felt about his entire situation, but the gym would be shut for the night. He bypassed his room and instead went to the common room. It was empty, he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep so he sat down, rested his head on the back of the low leather and stared at the ceiling. The room was dark, with only a small table lamp glowing in the corner. Blaine closed his eyes tight, willing the memories of that night with Finn to go away, but it didn't work. Finn's body had felt so heavy against mine, I couldn't catch my breath once we were on the bed, his hair was so soft but his arms were so strong. He was holding my body like he'd never let me go again. And those lips, those soft and gentle but fierce lips that touched mine and sparked something inside of me that I might never feel again. He had this look in his eyes that was hungry but so much more…caring. And now Quinn gets to look at those eyes. Quinn gets to brush her fingertips across those lips and down that neck. Blaine's head rolled to the side and his eyes stared out of the window, at the treetops illuminated by the moon.
He pulled his phone from his jeans pocket.
"Hey. Got home safe. See u this weekend I hope xxK" Blaine blinked hard, had it really been that long that he'd been sitting in here? He glanced at the clock on his phone and then on the wall. He had been thinking about Finn for two hours. It was midnight and he still felt wide-awake. He stared back down at his phone and flicked through his messages. He had kept some from Finn, under a different name, in the hopes that maybe he'd text him again, or just so he could read them when he felt like this.
"Everything reminds me of u. u looked great today btw. That thing u do with ur jeans is cute. F." That day they had been in the Lima Bean with a few other people. Blaine smiled whilst re-reading it. He remembered how Finn had had a sip of Rachel's coffee and made a grossed out face that day and he was wearing black jeans, but as usual he turned them up. He felt good that Finn had noticed.
"I just stood in dog poop. Hope ur day is better than mine. F." Texts like this always made Blaine laugh, Finn was so good at laughing at himself a little and it had cheered him up that day.
Blaine continued through the texts, smiling at each one. He began to feel a little drowsy, so pressed the buttons to lock the phone and stand up. As he was getting out of the chair his phone began to buzz. He looked down at the screen and his eyes widened. It was Finn. Finn was calling. He panicked and held the phone out, unsure what to do with it, relief swept over him when it stopped buzzing. To his horror it began again. He pressed the accept button and held it up to his face.
"Blaine?" He slumped backwards into the chair when he heard his voice. It had been a week, but he missed him so much.
"Hi." He spoke softly. The panic that had swept over him disappeared, and instead he felt that familiar warmth he had felt every time Finn phoned him and they had to whisper or speak quietly.
"Are you okay?" Finn said quickly, sounding slightly worried.
"I'm fine, why?" Blaine asked.
"You sent me a blank text. I thought something was wrong." Finn breathed.
"I'm fine." Blaine shook his head. "How are you?"
Finn was quiet for a few moments.
"I hear you and Quinn are back together?" Blaine blurted out. "I'm glad for you. I hope you're happy together." That was the lie of the century. In reality Blaine hoped that they would be miserable together. He hoped whenever he told Quinn she was beautiful he was imagining saying it to Blaine, when he looked at Quinn's eyes, he wanted Finn to see his, and when she ran her fingers through his hair, Blaine hoped he felt him do it instead.
"What does it have to do with you anyway?" Finn hissed. There was a pause as Blaine tried to think of something to say. He was tempted to just hang up, but then he heard a sigh.
"I'm sorry." Finn said. "That wasn't cool…I shouldn't snap at you."
"It's okay. I'm sorry I asked." Blaine replied, rubbing his face. "How come you're still awake?" Blaine asked. He moved his body round and lay down on the sofa, curling into a ball and savouring the sound of Finn's voice and his breathing.
"I haven't been able to sleep much. I'm not dating Quinn by the way. She asked, but I'm going to say no. It wouldn't be fair on her."
"Why?" Blaine asked.
"…She only asked because she wants to protect me, she doesn't really like me." Finn replied.
"Protect you from what?" Blaine sort of knew the answer. Kurt had implied that people were giving Finn a hard time, but he didn't know it was really that bad.
"From the talk and insults, and the slushies and being pushed into lockers... " Finn replied, somewhat nonchalantly. It confused Blaine, Finn always stood up for his friends, so why wasn't he standing up for himself?
"Finn, you should tell someone this is happening." Blaine said in disbelief.
"I can't. Well I don't want to. I guess I deserve it." Finn said.
"What?" Blaine said, louder than he meant to.
"Maybe not deserve it, but it reminds me of you…I remember why they're pushing me into a locker and it makes me feel like it was worth it… it reminds me of what we had and that gives me strength." Finn took a slow steady breath. "I deserve it for letting you go, and hurting my brother."
"Why didn't you let me take any of the blame?" Blaine said sadly. He felt his eyes begin to sting with forming tears.
"I wanted to protect you." Finn's voice was getting quieter.
"I was scared you hated me…I thought you were sick of waiting." Blaine let out a small sob. Through all of this he hadn't really cried, but talking to Finn was stirring up so many emotions. He was surprised by that. He thought he had been fairly successful in convincing himself that everybody wanted this and it was for the best, but in reality it wasn't. He liked Kurt a lot, but he could never feel for him what Finn made him feel and that was so confusing and also made him feel heart-crushingly guilty.
"Never." Finn said sternly. "I could never hate you…If I could, I would do it all over again, but next time I'd be honest with you." Finn sighed. "I regret not telling you before you and Kurt had the chance to get together. Everything reminds me of you, Blaine. I just can't stop thinking about you. My head goes foggy and I can't hear anything around me when I start to think of you and that night and the way you smell and …" Finn trailed off.
Blaine's body melted into a heap. He didn't know what to feel, but it was like someone had taken all of the sadness out of his body and replaced it with goose-bumps and longing instead.
"You shouldn't be saying things like this." Blaine said, his breath hitching in his throat.
"Why? Who's going to stop me? You?" Finn said. Blaine could detect the frustration in his voice. "I know you love hearing me say these things, Blaine. And I know you want to say them yourself but you're scared and confused and you feel guilty, just like I do."
Blaine was silently chewing his bottom lip. Finn was right. He wanted to say something so badly, but the words wouldn't form from his head to his vocal chords.
"…say something." Finn breathed and waited.
"I think I love you." Blaine said, his voice slow and calculating. He felt fireworks explode between his ears and his heart pounded against his rib cage. It was exhilarating.
Ch 1 - Adele- Rolling in the Deep.
Ch 2. - James Blake- There's a Limit to Your Love
Ch.3 (I forgot to title this chapter *oops*) Beyonce- Irreplaceable
Toni Braxton- Un-Break my Heart
Ch. 4 - Nat King Cole- Let's Face the Music and Dance
Ch 5. The Four Tops - I'll be there
Ch.6. Jack's Mannequin- Dark Blue
James Morrison - The Pieces Don't Fit Anymore
Ch. 6. & 7. - Dionne Warwick- Anyone Who Had a Heart
Dionne Warwick- Anyone who had a heart
