I had never felt so apathetic in all of my life.
I couldn't tell anymore if I was sick or just lethargic. Everything was getting worse; with every minute that passed I was falling deeper and deeper into this void of regret and pain. I nearly had to lock myself up last night so that I wouldn't go out and kill anyone; the desire was overwhelming. Perhaps what The Grand Highblood said was right. Perhaps I am just created to cull, and that's why I want to so much. I've tried everything to keep myself from hurting others…I've even tried soper. I don't like how it makes me feel though…druggy and sick. For a short period it was the only way to motivate myself into getting up and facing life every day, but now I don't even do that. Pulling on a leather jacket that I had stolen from Cronus, I left my hive and shivered at the cold, violent wind. Winter was coming fast, it seemed. Time was moving faster than I was at this point. Trudging along, I pointlessly walked into the woods near my hive once more. I'm not sure why I always came here; I guess you could say that I could just lose myself in this place. To get lost in the maze of an endless forest, lost in a daze of beautiful memories;
If only I could keep just one of them, and trash the rest of them. It would be the moment I met…her. But then, I would never know of my sin, and therefore couldn't carry out my oath. Perhaps it was better to hurt than forget. Simple enough, don't you think, brother? I hadn't been watching where I was going, so lost in the dead thoughts in my head, and I tripped over a small log. Crashing to the ground, I didn't even try to catch myself. I just fell, and laid there for a moment in the decaying grass on my side. I just lay there, staring up at the clouds. What was the point in getting up? To go home, and then what? Be lethargic and go crazy? That didn't sound very enticing. Then again brother, what did, the voice said in my head, and I laughed. I could wait for something to happen; someone to walk by or come looking for me. That wasn't likely, I thought. I felt a mind close to me, coming towards me. Okay. I ignored it, closing my eyes, until suddenly my horn was ripped from the crevice in which I was trapped. With a strangled sound of pain I was dragged upwards into the face of a beast. This beast was the size of a denizen, and I just stared him in the face, suddenly a little scared. The beast was suddenly stricken with red and blue bolts, and it dropped me with a pained scream, falling to its death. I lay upon the ground, and after a moment the face of a Mituna was above me. "WH47 7H3 H311 4R3 Y0U D01NG, KUR10Z?!" Mituna dragged me to my feet a little too violently, but he couldn't help it. He was just a little messed up in the head. "7H47 M0N273R 41M027 KI113D Y0U, WH47 7H3 H311 I2 WR0NG W17H Y0U?" I shrugged, wanting to bite my lip.
I just didn't notice him.
Mituna sighed. "Y0U G0774 G37 Y0UR 2H17 70G37H3R, M4N. 4ND WH47 7H3 FUCK H4PP3N3D 70 Y0UR F4CE?" I shook my head as he let go of me. "47 13427 137 M3 W41K Y0U H0M3."
It's alright, Mituna. I should actually walk you home. How did you get out here?
He opened his mouth, but then stopped, looking a little confused.
Inhaling deeply, I took ahold of his arm and began leading him to his hive.
He was like a lost grub, sometimes.
