Note: this is the wrap up of the story. Pay attention. This is going to explain everything that happened during Mardi Gras. The truth... As told by Nekozawa-senpai.
The Night the Host Club Attended Mardi Gras
Part Seven: Nekozawa
"Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai did what?" everyone asked together.
"Married, you heard me right. After Honey ate some hash cupcakes and kicked some Rastafarian ass, they stumbled into a bar. Mori got drunk, and in total irrationality confessed his love to Honey and the two got married."
"I didn't think that was legal in America," says Hikaru.
I smile to myself. Maybe I'm lying, maybe I'm not? I feel so bad (in a good way). Yes, I will admit that Honey did kick some Rastafarian ass, but he didn't I know how Mori feels about his little friend. I thought I would exploit it, in case he feels like confessing.
"Aren't we going to watch the DVD?" Kaoru asks.
"Oh this. No, it's just a copy of Braveheart I'm loaning it to Kyoya," says Nekozawa, "I am the only eye witness to last night's events."
"How did Kyoya lose his pants?" Tamaki asks.
This is my favorite story. Of course it makes me gain a lot of respect for Kyoya because of it.
"Apparently, Tamaki was drunk and Kyoya was trying to walk him back to the hotel, when they were stopped. A hooker propositioned them. When Kyoya told her you two were underage she walked away disappointed. That's when the drunk idiot got the idea to chase after her. It lead to a scuffle in an alley involving large Americans. Kyoya, being a hot young sober Japanese boy, was pushed against a wall. The men were about to do the unthinkable to him when Tamaki stumbled over and pulled Kyoya's pants down, thinking it was a joke. Kyoya was released by the guy so he could chase Tamaki. Kyoya lost his pants in the process. I found them and picked them up. Then the two of you managed to get here and that's all I know."
Kyoya stared chainsaws at Tamaki. Tamaki turned white and slithered to the floor in fear.
"How did Haru-chan end up in jail?" Honey asks.
He takes a bite of a cake. Mori pats his head lovingly. He's such a dope. Why doesn't he just tell Honey how he feels? It's getting a bit tedious.
"She stole coffee from a market, plain and simple."
"Why would she get arrested for that?" Tamaki asks.
"Because she had a water pistol, the store clerk thought it was a real gun. Those two idiots put on their loving brother act to get out of trouble, too bad they were so wasted they don't remember making out."
"WE MADE OUT!" the twins shout.
They glare at each other then shrug it off.
"Why did she steal coffee?" Mori asks.
"Because those two wanted coffee and wasted all their money on alcohol. She stole a surplus of coffee for them."
"That's where the coffee came from," Hikaru states while rubbing his chin.
"What about Renge?" Kyoya asks.
"She just partied too hard. Poor girl."
"Hold on a minute, did Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai really get married?" Kaoru asks.
Mori blushes dark red.
"Takashi, are we married?" Honey asks.
"No."
Honey continues to stare into Mori's eyes. I wait. Is he going to tell him? He should tell him. He should definitely tell him.
"I love you too, Takashi," Honey says.
Mori kisses the top of Honey's head, smiling and blushing. He doesn't say anything.
"It's about damn time," says Kyoya and the twins.
Tamaki sits in the corner poking his index fingers together and looking exceedingly confused.
Well, that's what happened last night at Mardi Gras. I think we learned a valuable lesson. Alcohol and pretty rich boys don't mix.
