After a long time! Welcome back to Rain of Despair! ^^ And yeah, I'll take my chance to plug in my new Durarara Shizaya fics! Itazura no Inutachi and Whistling Dolls are both Supernatural and Romance genres. The former one is a Shizaya/Mikida fic which features probably Japanese and western demons. The latter one is a VIS (Vorona-Izaya-Shizuo) fic and also features nightmares plus cheating and anything connected. Please read and review for both fics. ^^ And of course, don't forget to read and review Rain of Despair as well!

Somehow got tired of Izaya so I brought to you Shizuo! (Shizuo: Shini.) A chapter longer than usual… (Still struggling about the nicknames… but I'll do something about it.) Yeah, I have to admit I have not only read/watch only up to volume three of the light novels so I still don't have any idea about anybody else. But I'm on a serious catch-up session so… ^^

Disclaimer: I do not own DRRR! But a download of Volume 4 and 5. Soon, I'll have my hands on the other volumes till the tenth one.

Warning: Yaoi, gore, horror, violence, and fancies! And yeah, their attitudes are starting to deviate. XD (Izaya: Not just now, Rei-chan.)

Rain of Despair

"Even though you're the biggest psycho I've known, deep down you're still human."

"Stop struggling like Izaya, little miss."

"No will do, baby. I will kill that man. He doesn't have the right to cut through you… no one does."

"If only he just love me back…"

"I'm sorry…"

Rain of Despair

One nightmare after another… and all I get are shaky legs…

The cold night breeze whistles as the two guys stare at each other's eyes… after those words seem to stop the time. Shizuo then looks away from him and then he murmurs, "I just had a feeling that the fucking ghost said something bad to you. It's not like I care that much but…" The brunet's grip tightens some more and then Shizuo already reacts, "Oi, flea, you're—" He then notices something dripping from above… it cannot be the rain since the skies are all clear. He looks up at Izaya's face again… only to see him crying without a sound. Tears are flowing down from his eyes as his gaze gets fixed on the ground. Shizuo frowns and then he gets off from Izaya who just lets his arm slide off. The blond grasps at his arm and he speaks despite the giddiness he is suffering from, "Oi, Izaya. Why are you crying?"

He then moves to wipe off his tears and talks like he is grinning like how he used to, "I was just remembering about something. I'm… going to be okay. That's… that's…" Shizuo then walks ahead and looks back at him, "Are you heading to my house again? I don't think—" He then shoots his hand at his head and then his body gives in to the call of lightheadedness. His eyes blink multiple times, becoming more and more blurred in every blink. Soon, he loses consciousness and collapses yet again… feeling someone catching him. Izaya then brings him down at the ground and looks around to find a way to carry the unconscious tall guy. Soon, he just wraps his jacket around him and sighs, "You're amusing and troublesome at the same time."

He tries to carry Shizuo back to his house… enduring the weight he has to deal with. He reaches the destination and brings Shizuo down at the floor. He then prepares a futon and rolls Shizuo to lie down at it. He huffs and takes everything he needs to treat the wounds he did give to the blond. However, he hesitates to move and just stares at the blond's resting face… a peaceful sight he has never seen for quite some time. He then touches Shizuo's cheek and bends down to lay his head at the blond's chest. He closes his eyes and then he smiles as he feels the same radiating warmth. But the event last night still haunts his mind… and so his grip at Shizuo's shirt tightens, "I wonder if you mean it."

"Izaya." He twitches and then he lifts his head up to turn to his back… seeing Mama-san sitting patiently at the corner. He frowns at her and then she whispers, "Let go of him. He has left you. Let's go home now." Izaya then lays his head back at Shizuo's chest and speaks loudly, "I am not going home… or whatever shit." The mother ghost then stands up and walks to him slowly, "Let's… go… home…" Izaya lifts his face and then he frowns at her, "If you force your daughter to let go of someone she adores, that'll make you the worst mother ever!" She stops and then screams until she collapses and disappears with her cries, "IZAYAAAAAAA, I will be back… let's go home SOOOOOOON." Izaya sighs and leans his chin at his palm and swings the knife around his finger, "I can't believe I have to 'be' a daughter to make her go away."

He then stares at Shizuo once again and then he sighs with a smile. He straightens up and starts treating the blond's wounds… licking his lips at the thought of stripping Shizuo while he's asleep. However, beneath those malicious grins, a confused heart tries to brace itself in the torturous turn out of events. As he silently works on the wounds, his mind is running around for answers… answers as to why Shizuo still talks the way he does as if last night has never happened. Izaya finishes wrapping the blond's wounds in bandages and so he covers Shizuo with the blankets. However, he stares at the blond again, "You said I don't deserve to be love and you don't love me. But why do you still act like you're concerned?" He then lies down next to Shizuo to share the blanket and futon. He leans his back against Shizuo's side, "Oyasuminasai… Shizu-chan."

Rain of Despair

Rei Haruno —Sakura no Imooto

Chapter 7: Confessions

Tick. Tock. Tick. The sound clicking of the clock awakens Izaya from his slumber and then he turns to his side to not see anyone beside him. He then gets up and then he hears someone speaks, "Ohayoo." Izaya turns to where the kitchen is and then finds Shizuo cooking what smells like a soup. He has his pants and a blue shirt on which fails to hide the bandages running at his neck and arms. Izaya then remains sitting at the futon and then he hesitates to talk to him… maybe Shizuo probably remembers the incident at the park soon enough. The blond then lays another bowl of soup at the table and sits down before it, "Oi. Don't just sit there. Come here." Izaya gets up and goes to his side, "Looks like you're feeling much better."

"Uh. Though my head still hurts." Shizuo whispers and then Izaya starts feasting on the soup… only opening a topic that he does not really like to talk about, "Shizu-chan, can I ask you something?" The blond hums a 'yes' and then the brunet gulps in his hesitation. Shizuo looks at him and then he asks, "What's wrong, you flea? You're acting weird again." Izaya smirks and then he glares at the innocent soup, "You're the one acting weirder. You talk like you never…" The blond glares at him and grinds his teeth, "That's why I already said 'I'm sorry'." Izaya sighs and leans backwards with his arms at the support, "Back in the park, one night ago, did you mean what you said?"

"What park?" Shizuo answers seconds after and then Izaya laughs out so hard, "You got'ta be fucking kidding me, right!?" The blond answers again and the brunet keeps on laughing out loud, "What park?" Shizuo then reaches his temper and flips the table towards Izaya but the slippery flea manages to dodge the planned smashing. He then covers his mouth and chuckles again with Shizuo raging as he inquires about that 'fucking park' Izaya is asking about, "IIIIIIZAAAAAYAAAAA! What happened at that park!?" Izaya waves his hand and then tries to speak despite the mix emotions of a little joy and humiliation at his face, "F-Forget it. I'll just remake the highlight for you." He then straightens and Shizuo brings down the table he is about to throw at the flea… only to watch the flea prance towards him. Izaya holds the blond's shoulders again and nears his face, "You haven't answered me yet."

"…" Shizuo looks away with a blush and then Izaya let goes of him and heads out of Shizuo's house, "Let's just meet later." The blond then grabs the table to swing it to hit Izaya's head, "Oi, oi, oi! We're not yet finished talking yet." Izaya holds his head and then he speaks without looking at the blond, "Let's just talk about it again later, Shizu-chan. Don't worry, I'm all good." The blond walks to him and then he grabs Izaya's shoulder, "I don't know how you trick people… because you're a terrible liar. Tell me, what happened there." Izaya then wears his normal cunning eyes and smiles at Shizuo… before completely running off. The blond squints at the brunet's behavior and then he scratches his head, "That fucking flea."

Shizuo then twitches as he remembers about his job to do… how many days have he been not reporting to his boss? He then tries to look for his phone… only to find it nowhere… making him curse under his breath. Beep. Beep. Beep. A phone rings and then he looks for it… only to find Izaya's cellphone inside the jacket that he failed to bring with him. He checks the brunet's phone and reads a message from Namie, 'Izaya, where are you? Your sisters are getting worried. And the things you've ordered have arrived. I'm charging everything to your account! How dare you use my name in the order slip!?' Shizuo raises a brow and pockets the phone anyway. He then changes to his bartender uniform and goes out… "I need to find Tom."

Rain of Despair

The streets of Ikebukuro seem to be unchanged yet Shizuo does not really feel good at all. Izaya's odd behavior about that park incident is still bothering him… but there's no way he can gather data from someone else. Then he stumbles upon the park… where a lot have been passing by. He tuts again and then a woman goes to bug him for a moment, "Haro! Are you looking for something? Why don't you try writing it here? It might help you find what you are looking for." She smiles at him and then he takes on the offer and writes on her sketch board, "I just hope that can help." He then leaves and the woman checks what he has written… 'My fucking phone and my memories about that fucking park someone important is niggled about.' She then looks back at the man who is barely at her view and smiles, "Just put your heart in finding them, Bartender-san."

Shizuo walks around the city some more… only to feel rushing attacks from behind. He blocks the first set and the two figures keep on attacking only to get countered by Shizuo. He grabs their ankles and raise them foot first, "What the fuck is your problem?" Mairu then protests to be released as Kururi holds down her loose shirt, "Shizuo-san, let us go." Shizuo drops them down and then they get up with Mairu huffing at the blond, "Shizuo-san! You're the most despicable ever!" Kururi nods and then he scratches his head, "What did I do?" The two look at each other and then Kururi answers, "Last night, Izaya-nii-san is very mad. Namie-san said that you dumped him." Mairu then nods strongly… Shizuo squints and leans nearer the youngest Orihara seconds later, "Wait… what?"

"I said Namie-san—" Shizuo shushes her with hand gestures and looks around, "Let's talk somewhere else. Where do you want to eat at least?" The girls look at each other and then Mairu raises her hands with Kururi raising just one and not yelling with her sister, "Where we want to eat? Russia Sushi!" Shizuo scratches his head and leads the girls towards the Russia Sushi… while Kururi gives him what he needs, "Here, Shizuo-san. We found that lying around at the streets." Mairu then giggles naughtily and the blond takes it, "You found my phone. Thank you." He then checks his phone… still bothered by that cellphone chain hanging at the side. He pockets the phone and speaks, "Looks like I'm going to hear a lot from these girls."

They reach Russia Sushi and then Shizuo has to treat them with some orders… so that they won't stop talking about that night they keep on mentioning. However, Shizuo is getting bewildered with everything they are saying… talking about Izaya crying non-stop even to the extent of bathing under the white rain. He can barely eat with the Orihara sisters' wild imagination and how someone named Erika Karisawa has influenced an idea on them that the two are having a relationship or in love at least. 'Erika Karisawa? Who the fuck is that? But she seems to know the two of us personally… I should probably start memorizing names.' But the cutest thing Kururi and Mairu enjoys as they story-tell is… that utter blush on Shizuo's face.

"We also gave him the pair chain of the one we gave you, Shizuo-san." Mairu speaks with excitement and then Kururi smiles as she finishes her order of sushi, "He seems to be so happy about it. Well, until the night after that." The two look at each other and they seem to be planning of something. Mairu then giggles and she happily speaks, "And like other pair chains that she is selling, there are words written in the shirts. And the one written in the Shizuo-san chain is…" They then speak with actions corresponding for each word: first word is where their fingers at their chest, second is where their pairs of hands form a heart symbol, and the third is where they thrust the hearts forward, "I. LOVE. IZAYA!" The blond twitches again and then nearly flips the table in madness if only he does not want to hurt the girls, "Who is that fucking Erika Karisawa? I'm going to kill her."

"Hm? Why, Shizuo-san?" Kururi stares at Shizuo's angry form where his hand is holding his forehead and his teeth grinding, "Don't you love Izaya-nii-san?" The question suddenly dishevels the blond and then Mairu joins the torturous inquisition, "Right, Shizuo-san. Don't you? Because we're pretty sure Iza-nii won't be reacting like that if he hasn't been showing you some hints at all." The blond's grip at his chopsticks tightens and eventually breaks it… sending chills to the sisters. Mairu then hugs Kururi in fear and she chuckles a stutter, "O-Or maybe we're j-just taking things too far now, neh, Shizuo-san?" The blond then calms down and speaks as the two girls stop talking, "Stop forcing things on us." And then Simon comes to the side to serve their teas, "Please enjoy the tea, yo. And yes, Shizuo." The blond looks at their Russian friend and then he talks with his weird Japanese, "Izaya seems to be acting weird yesterday. He talks a lot about you."

"What?" Shizuo squints and then Simon sits beside him as he distributes the teas to the girls, "Though I was not surprised that his head is spinning when it comes to you." The sisters giggle and then Simon holds the blond's shoulder down to stop him from destroying anything anymore. Mairu then raises her hand to take the attention of the waiter so that she could introduce themselves, "Hai! Hai! My name is Mairu and this is Kururi. Can we hear what Iza-nii said about Shizuo-san?" The big guy smiles and starts talking with the girls with Shizuo holding his head, refusing to listen to them anymore. Simon words then catches the blond's attention with his next lines, "And to be honest, Izaya's starting to get more and more open about what is going on in his mind. Though, it always has to be you, Shizuo."

"The hell." The blond whispers and then the big guy adds up, "I won't be really surprise if one day he'll yell out—" Mairu interrupts him with hand gestures and Kururi nods at the big guy… the girls repeats their same actions with Simon imitating them, "I. LOVE. SHIZUO!" The blond then slams his fist at the table that makes all dishes hop, "Shut up!" Mairu shrieks and then Simon catches all dishes that threaten to jump off the table. Kururi then cocks her head to the side, "Shizu-chan doesn't really like other people talking about loved ones." Shizuo then stands up and then he leaves with his hands at his pocket, "I'm going." The girls and the big guy watch him walk off and out the restaurant… until Kururi remembers, "Mairu, Shizuo-san hasn't paid yet."

Rain of Despair

"Yeah, right. Izaya doesn't have a source of income right now. But to take over my job for the mean time… he's actually acting strange." Shizuo whispers as he walks out of their boss' office. He then decides to have a more intensive search for Izaya upon learning that he is wasting time as Tom's bodyguard by then. He then starts running around to look faster… only to hear a weird voice in his head, "What? Why are you still going after her, Shizuo?" The blond stops for a while and then he turns around to see a semi-transparent image of a man at a distance. He is in corporate attire yet his face looks utterly maniacal which face is incomparable to all that Shizuo has ever seen.

The guy then starts walking towards him, "Izaya is not capable of loving you. Why are you still running after her? She doesn't deserve any kindness from you. I thought you wanted to kill her? Then why are you protecting her?" The blond glares at him and then he speaks with developing anger, "So you were the one who knocked me out yesterday. What do you want from me?" The man laughs and then the surroundings start to dim and turn black, "I want the girl, Shizuo. That amorous young lady I met that night. I want her… give her to me!" Shizuo glares some more and then he turns away, "I don't have time to get women for you. Just leave me alone." The man then speaks in a much horrible voice, "You are very strong, Shizuo. I also want that strength…"

Shizuo looks back and twitches as he sees the guy now right in front of him, "I want that strength! Let's break bones much easier and harder! I want to hear Anri-chan scream in so much pain! Her cute voice… her fragile body! I want to watch her crawl across the floor, crying for help and out of pain!" The blonde man then suddenly throws his fist towards the ghost's face yet his arm only goes through. The ghost then grabs his neck and then furious cuts mark along Shizuo's arm again, "Give me the girl!" The blonde then realizes that he isn't able to control his own arm anymore and he couldn't even grab the ghost's hands squeezing his neck, "F-Fuck you."

The ghost disappears and then Shizuo collapses to the floor… the wounds still bleeding on his arm. He takes a look at it and then he hears a flinch from behind. Shizuo looks at the alley connected to where he is… only to see Anri standing with frightened eyes. She is not in usual Raira uniform but he knows she is that girl Celty is friends with. She then braces herself as the blonde man stands up and walks towards her… his eyes still with pacification. She tightens her hold on her sling bag until Shizuo gets near enough… to ask, "Who are you again?" Anri twitches and then she loosens up a bit, "H-Heiwajima-san? It's A-Anri Sonohara." Shizuo then twitches as he hears her name… and then suddenly flings himself to the side before the weird whips breaks away from his wounds, "Shit."

"Heiwajima-san? What's going on? Why are you—? AHH!" Anri screams with a duck to evade the lashing of the whips at her direction. She then circles around the struggling Shizuo to take out her Saika and prepare for battle, "Heiwajima-san! Why are you attacking me?" The blonde man then grasps at his own arm that seems to be yelling out for Anri's name, "Just… RUN!" And before Anri can even go away, another pair of black walls encloses the exits from the place… with Anri gasping at the sudden dimming of surroundings, "What's happening?" The blonde man then kneels to control the rampaging arm and whips, "These ghosts are really annoying." Then a woman emerges from the black wall where Shizuo and Anri are facing, "Shizuo-kun…" The girl tightens her hold on Saika as it whispers things to her again… about the woman who is standing at a distance.

The woman then reaches out her hands to Shizuo, "Shizuo-kun… come home with us." The blond then flinches and whispers in his confusion, "You're fucking kidding me, right? There's no way I'll go with you." He then stands up as he keeps the whips from moving but the woman walks closer, "But Izaya don't want to go because of you. Maybe… maybe if I can…" Her features then turn back to exactly what she looks like back in the elevator incident, "Drag you home, Izaya will come with me!" Shizuo then recognizes her as the Mama-san and then his arm starts to struggle yet again, "Fuck you and Izaya! I own this guy and I won't lose this strength!" The woman then rages some more, "Papa… why don't you just consider our happiness even just ONCE!"

"What is this?" Anri whispers and then the whips start rampaging again after getting out of Shizuo's control… attacking her and the mother all along. She then uses her sword to cut all emerging whips and the mother attack Shizuo directly… not caring if she gets pierced and crushed by thousand whips. The blond man then tries to withstand the blood loss while trying to regain control over his arm and dodging the mother's attacks in such a narrow place. And as he fights with both physical and mental factors, he can hear voices in his head… like children screaming in pain. His sight then starts to blur and dim much more yet he shouldn't give in to unconsciousness right then… "I might hurt Izaya again." But the pain he is suffering from starts to escalate… much more when he trips at an attack and the mother gets to wrap her tongue around him again, "Come home! Be a good son-in-law!"

"Arghh!" Shizuo groans aloud and then the mother starts crushing him… his bones roughly breaking at the tightening grip. Anri then tries to help him but the whips keep on bugging her, "Heiwajima-san!" She cuts all those which are approaching her and jumps to cut the tongue but the mother's hand stretches to get her ankle and dangle her at a high altitude, "You! Who are you? Don't you dare intervene!" She then screams as she gets vigorously wiggled by the mother's hand… yet she uses Saika to cut her hand off. The mother groans and she falls from a mid-air… only to be wrapped by the whips underneath. She struggles to get out of the developing cocoon… reaching her hand out to the now unconscious Shizuo, "Heiwajima-san!"

Amidst the dark void, a cry of agony haunts the blond's ears to his awakening. Shizuo groans softly and holds his head in pain. He looks around to see the surroundings devoid from light… as he lies on an invisible floor that seems to be extending endlessly. Shizuo stands up and then walks around as he suddenly sees a light to engulf him… leaving him to the lounge of an old house. He hisses in the tensed atmosphere and cold feeling embracing his body and calls out to whoever is there, "OI! Is somebody here?" He walks along the wooden floor covered by some kind of sticky liquid… only to find a girl lying around. Shizuo walks to her and stares at her to see if the girl is still alive. She looks like a primary schooler yet her body is twisted in many directions.

"Help me… somebody, help me…" Shizuo then looks at his side to see a woman covered in a black liquid…her hand reaching out to him as she tries to crawl. Despite the painful condition, she moves along with one of her arms heavily scraped and the other pulled to some joint-dislocating extent. She then keeps on calling for help… only to stop moving halfway towards Shizuo's place. The blond squints and then he walks along some more… finally finding a weird human image coiled up at a corner. It is translucent in color and it keeps on making agonizing cries of different voices. He walks up to it and kneels down, "Oi… what happened here?"

"Murder… killings…" It somewhat speaks… the blond swearing he hears a voice resembling Izaya's. Loud rattling sounds conquer the room and then Shizuo stands up… only to see Papa-san dragging a steel pipe across the furniture of the house. He is laughing maniacally and also stinking with the stench Shizuo hates the most… overdrinking. He then spits somewhere and cracks his fist, "You again?" The guy then laughs out some more at him, "Get out of my way! If you don't want to get hurt, Shizuo!" The blond smirks and then attacks the guy as he grabs the fridge which lies at the image's side, "I'll borrow this." He lashes out at the father with the fridge and then the ghost gets hit, his skull breaking at the hit. Shizuo even throws the fridge at him and they get sent out of the residence.

"It's envious…" Shizuo twitches and looks behind him to see the image turn into a more clear one… eventually recognizing the little girl as the Rain Todo Izaya is talking about. She then stares differently at the blond and speaks, "It's envious." The blond bends down a bit to get nearer the child, "Envious how? Believe me that strength is a curse." She then holds on to her own neck and tries to break it on her own, "Kagiri ran far away. He never looked back or even helped me. Was I that worthless… that even the man I thought who loved me left me to die?" Shizuo twitches some more and then he watches her break her own neck and fall down, bleeding some more at the floor, "I wonder… maybe we should really switch places." She then looks at Shizuo and reaches out her hands with a smile, "I would really love to be with you, Shizuo."

"What's going on?" Shizuo whispers and then her arms fall down to the floor and the place starts to get eaten by light. Shizuo then feels weak and then he collapses all along again. For seconds, his mind seems to stop thinking about anything else… but that one important person. Then wild shaking comes to him and so his mind comes back to control… starting with opening his eyes to see Anri's face looming at his view, "Heiwajima-san!" He then gets up and looks around, "Where are we?" She then sighs and then notices that the wounds on his arm are already gone, "At the same alley. Your wounds… they suddenly disappeared." The blond checks his arm and then she asks, "What was that earlier? They are both yelling about Orihara-san and family happiness. And they don't look seem to be… residents of the place as well."

"Sorry. But I can't just involve people with fuckers. Just don't talk about it with someone else… most likely to Celty. Never mention anything to Celty." Shizuo gets up on his own and Anri dusts herself and examines her own wounds. The man looks at her and then to the horizon of the alley. "I wonder… maybe we should really switch places. I would really love to be with you, Shizuo." He then holds his head in the developing headache… he's not really used in thinking too much about something. Shizuo then looks back at Anri and speaks, "You better go home for now and heal yourself." The highschooler nods and then she looks at him before she goes away, "Is everyone going to be alright?" Shizuo sighs and walks off while waving at her, "I don't know."

The blonde man then reaches his house and gets surprised by what he sees at the table… a freshly bought cake. He then looks around and finds someone browsing through his terebi, "Mah. Okaeri, Shizu-chan." He then walks to him and sits down next to Izaya, "Are you ready to talk now?" The brunet blushes and tosses the remote somewhere, "Somewhat. I met my sisters earlier and then they said they talked about it. My, my. That's a bit embarrassing." The brunet leans his chin at his palm which arm is atop a knee from the crossed legs, "Even Simon has to hear about it." The blond squints at him and then he stares at the terebi which is busy showing a commercial, "That stupid Papa-san is starting get in my veins. He's trying to take control over my body. Well, he somewhat found leisure in talking to you at the fucking park."

Izaya twitches and then he sighs… despite his curiosity, he does not want to talk about those events that have already happened. He then straightens and gets up to take the cake from the table, "Here. I just wanted to eat something… but let's share." They silently dig in the food as they attempt to put their attention to whatever the terebi is showing… only to realize that they should talk at least. Izaya's fork stays longer at his mouth longer as he thinks of something to say… but then Shizuo starts, "Rain Todo… she appeared before me again." The brunet twitches and then he looks at the blond who is still staring at the terebi, "She said something about switching places with someone… because she loves to be with me." Izaya's eyes widen and then he sighs, "Well, I did hear that from her as well. It's not like I would agree—"

Shizuo then pulls him closer to kiss Izaya's head… "I won't let her either. Because I love you, too."

End of Chapter 7

"What does Ryouka mean by… I'm not Rain? Perhaps you can tell me so I can really help you."

"Izaya… let us have a maiden's battle. For Shizuo's heart."

"Hm. Madoka Hasegawa, huh? She does have a load of debts."

"Tch. Here she comes again! Izaya, get them out of here!"

"I will be fine here. Don't have to worry about me, Mama-san."

Chapter 8: Protection

"I'm really sorry. Rain is really a bad girl."