Dissonance
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Dissidia: Final Fantasy and all associated characters are property of Square Enix. This is a nonprofit work.
A/N: Inspired by Chaos's dream in Shade Impulse. I finally finished the game, and like many others, found the storyline wanting. Therefore, onwards with the story!
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"To the Avatar of Chaos: Greetings from the Ordered Lands and thank you for your kind letter. It was quite the pleasant surprise, as I hope this correspondence becomes the first step in reaching a mutual accord of real peace. It is for this reason that I send you this lily. If it pleases you, plant it in a garden of your choosing, somewhere where the sight of it puts your soul at ease. Your peer in the stewardship of the Gods, the Avatar of Cosmos."
Silence fell in the throne room of Chaos, broken only by the soft rustle of Sephiroth refolding the parchment and tucking it back into its envelope. In the Throne, Chaos delicately turned the white lily over and over in two of his four hands. His fingers were so massive that the lily stem seemed like a hair between them and the bloom itself was like a star against his hoary black palms. Garland stood at his side, and though his face was obscured by his helm, Sephiroth could almost see the dismay beaming out of his visor.
"There is no bulb," said Chaos finally, lifting the flower and inspecting it at eye level. "How am I to plant this?"
"My lord, you are not serious!" Garland exclaimed, deeply aghast.
"It is unlike anything we have in our own lands," said Chaos contemplatively. "How simple and elegant."
Garland began vibrating with rage. Sephiroth could hear the fine rasp of his plate mail as he shook with suppressed fury. Knowing Garland's foul temper, Sephiroth knew the Heir wanted nothing more than to rip the flower out of Chaos's hands and crush beneath his foot. But of course, even Garland would not dare do such a thing to Chaos.
"Be that as it may," said Garland through gritted teeth. "My lord, you must not keep this. Earlier, when I spoke to you of my concerns about Mateus and-"
"Peace, Garland," said Chaos. He traced the sinuous curve of the lily with one massive talon. "Mateus is all bark and no bite."
"On the contrary, my lord-"
"You doubt my power, Garland?"
"My lord, your power has never been in doubt," said Garland in a voice of forced calm. "But if you appear to be so taken with Cosmos, then the others will take it for weakness. You are the Avatar of the God of Chaos, but there is no reason to purposely forment rebellion in your stronghold!"
"Rebellion?" Chaos turned and looked at Garland, his ember-like eyes smoldering. "I am not some mortal king, ruling at the sufferance of the populace and disposed of with a sword to the neck. The generals can do nothing to me, and do nothing that I do not allow. This barking that so worries you is but meaningless noise that is stilled with a hard slap to the muzzle."
Chaos rose. He was monstrously tall, taller than Exdeath, and the massive proportions of the throne room seemed to shrink to fit him. Garland seemed to shrivel, armor and all. Sephiroth certainly felt like disappearing into a corner. Anger seemed to boil over Chaos's skin as he loomed over Garland.
"When last we spoke on this topic, I said this conversation was finished," said Chaos. "Yet you disobey me and disturb me with this meaningless anxiety again."
"I am allowed to say such things," said Garland, and his voice was surprisingly strong. "I am your successor. If not me, who else?"
"You have already voiced your concerns," said Chaos. his eyes narrowing. "And my patience wears thin. Garland, leave us."
Us? Sephiroth realized with a sinking feeling that Chaos was not using the royal (divine?) "we". Garland realized the same thing and stood for a hair a moment, so angry that Sephiroth could feel it slapping against his skin. In a screech of twisting metal and a heavy snap of the cape, Garland whipped around and stalked noisily from the room. Chaos folded all four of his arms and glowered.
"Hmph," he said finally and went back to the Throne. As he sprawled in the ominous chair, Chaos directed his gaze at Sepihroth and said, "Well, this demands some sort of reply, does it not?"
"I...suppose it does..." said Sephiroth cautiously.
"How do you believe we should proceed?"
Why was Chaos asking him? Sephiroth was a novice when it came to courtship. The one time he'd been in a relationship, he had been the one pursued. He hadn't met anyone he'd wanted to chase, either.
"Well, she did send a gift," said Sephiroth finally.
Chaos nodded. "Yes, she did." His voice turned wistful, or so it seemed. "Did you see her?"
"Yes."
"How did she fare?"
"She seemed well enough," said Sephiroth. "She handles her Champions with blithe grace and assurance. They all feel a great deal of loyalty and affection for her."
"That is well," said Chaos. "And how did they react to your presence?"
"Predictably," said Sephiroth. "But Cosmos seemed to approve of my purpose in coming, so I should encounter little difficulty."
"Ah," said Chaos. "And one more thing..."
"Yes, my lord?"
"You have been touched by Cosmos," said Chaos, steepling two of his hands. His eyes narrowed. "Why?"
Touched? When? Sephiroth thought for a moment. "Oh," he said suddenly. "She touched me with the Scepter of Order."
"Why?"
Sephiroth shrugged. "To extract a promise from me," said Sephiroth. "That I would not cause trouble while in her lands."
"That is reasonable," said Chaos, nodding.
"It was somewhat painful," said Sephiroth, and Chaos frowned. "That, I did not expect. Is the Scepter a weapon against the denizens of Chaos?"
"Normally, no," said Chaos. "The Scepter of Order merely returns things to their original state, but as you may recall, I took something from you when you entered my service."
Sephiroth felt a cold chill run down his spine. "So the Scepter returned it, then?"
Chaos studied him for a long moment. "In a fashion," he said finally. "You were not fully restored, so there is still some protection for you. But what I took is returning, slowly."
Sephiroth began to feel a little ill. Chaos apparently noticed.
"You are stronger than you were," said Chaos in what might have been a kindly tone. "Your apprehension is understandable, but in truth, I believe you have nothing to fear. You will not succumb to madness again."
As this was coming from the God of Madness, Sephiroth felt somewhat reassured. But he still felt uncomfortable.
"Should I leave you to contemplate your reply, my lord?"
Chaos drummed his fingers on the armrest of the Throne. "I suppose," he said. "It has been a while since you've tended to your demesne. I will summon you when I have need of you."
"Yes, my lord," said Sephiroth. He saluted and left the Throne room. Unsurprisingly Garland was waiting for him outside, and Sephiroth sidestepped the angry swipe the armored man took at his throat. He almost drew the Masamune for self defense, but remembered that in the Black Palace, only Chaos and Garland were allowed to be armed.
"I thought you were taking care of the problem," Garland snarled.
"I never said anything of the sort," said Sephiroth. Garland struck at him again, but he was too slow-Sephiroth sidestepped him easily and at once had the open hallway at his back. Garland spun around as Sephiroth began to walk down the hall, pointedly ignoring him.
"Don't you walk away from me!"
Sephiroth sensed the strike before it came and sidestepped again as Garland's bizarre chain-sword shot through the place he'd been standing. He ducked as Garland wrenched the sword to one side and made the heavy bladed chain slice to the side. As the sword began to snap back to Garland, Sephiroth stood up and caught the end of it, hooking his hand in the dull part where one section of the sword reached the other. The sword rattled and strained as it tried to return to its original shape.
"It appears you misunderstand my position in the Black Palace," said Sephiroth as mildly as he could. Garland snarled as he tried to wrench his sword back, but Sephiroth just tightened his grip and the stretched-out chain sword just rattled uselessly between them. "I am neither Governor nor General. I have no need of your favor or approval. The only one I answer to is Chaos, and since it seems he's put out with you, I doubt he'd mind if I knocked your tin-clad self around the Black Palace a few times."
"You dare to presume-"
"Who is handling a sensitive matter for Chaos? And who was forcefully dismissed from the Throne Room?"
Garland yanked on his sword again, but this time Sephiroth let go, and the heavy sword almost knocked Garland over as it snapped back to him with too much force. Sephiroth considered dashing up to the man and kicking him in the face for the hell of it, but he had the hall at his back and no real inclination to annoy the one who would one day assume ultimate power. So he thought of his demesne, sadly untended for far too long, and winked out of Garland's reach. He didn't always have to manifest his wing to access the power; in fact, it was quicker not to. By the time Garland recovered, Sephiroth was long gone.
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Cloud had never really thought much about getting his first kiss. He supposed that when it happened, it would just happen. He would meet someone he liked, they'd hit it off, and then there would be lip contact. Oh, he didn't think it would be magical or have sparks or great fountains of passion or anything like that. Mouths would touch, and whatever happened next would happen.
Sometimes he imagined kissing people. Actually, when he wasn't doing anything in particular, he daydreamed about it rather often. Not because he longed for it, it was just simply something that hadn't happened yet. Sex hadn't happened yet either, or a committed relationship, or even a change in hairstyle. When nothing was definite, it was all open to possibility and imagination.
But that had all changed today. A mixture of embarrassment, indignity, and pure confusion prickled uncomfortably in Cloud's chest as he and the other Knights trudged from the lake to the White Palace. The others were probably feeling similar emotions, but not for the same reasons. They were feeling like they'd failed, letting Sephiroth get away so easily. Cloud, on the other hand...
Well, he always thought his first kiss would be something he would actually participate in. As in, want in the first place.
His neck hurt a bit-Sephiroth had immensely strong hands, and Cloud was pretty sure the man could have broken his head off if he'd just squeezed a bit harder. And being pressed up against him was like hugging a warm marble pillar, albeit one that smelled like leather and something weird. And getting kissed by him, well...
"Is that the way kisses are supposed to be?" Cloud rubbed his mouth. His lips felt bruised, like Sephiroth had headbutted him wth his teeth or something. And the inside of his mouth just felt slimy, because somehow Sephiroth had managed to get his tongue in there. "I don't see what's supposed to be pleasant about this."
At least when Tidus had given him air underneath the lake, his little brother hadn't been so forceful.
"What are you doing, Cloud?"
Cloud glanced at the speaker. It was Firion, who gestured at his mouth.
"Oh," said Cloud, dropping his hand. "Nothing."
"Was he a good kisser?" Asked Firion, smirking a little.
"I don't know," said Cloud, shrugging. As such, he missed the spasm of fury that shook Luc's body hard enough to make his gauntlets rattle, though the Champions flanking Luc each took a step to the side.
"Well, did you like it?"
"No."
"Then he wasn't a good kisser."
That made sense. And that should have been the end of it, except...
"That sucks, dude." Tidus, of course. When Cloud simply shrugged, he just HAD to add, "Your first kiss should be a hot girl."
"Firwhanow?" Bartz popped up from behind Cloud, his eyes wide with shock. "What? What? What?"
"Thanks, Tidus," Cloud grumbled. TIdus laughed nervously, and sensing a more receptive target, Bartz changed focus.
"Cloud's never been kissed at ALL?"
"It's not that big a deal," Cloud said loudly.
"It kinda is!" Said Bartz. Fortunately, he seemed more shocked than gleeful. "I mean, you're not exactly bad on the eyes, so-"
"I haven't found anybody I've wanted to kiss," said Cloud, looking at him in annoyance. "Is that so strange?"
"Well..." Bartz opened his mouth, closed it, thought about it, and finally shrugged. "I guess not. Still..."
"Still what?"
"I'm a year younger than you are, and I've kissed LOTS of girls," said Bartz, all but exploding with it.
"Why is that something to be proud of?"
"Because I'm popular with ladies?" Bartz waggled his brows in a way he must have learned from Zidane.
"But how do the girls feel about the fact you've kissed lots of girls?"
"It's not like I'm cheating on anyone," said Bartz, though he sounded just a trifle uncomfortable. "It's just kissing,"
"Right," said Cloud. "It's just kissing."
"But it's fun!"
"It's not fun if you don't want it." Cloud pointed at his mouth. "Case in point; this was not fun."
"But that was kissing a man," said Bartz.
"Hey," said Firion, Cecil, and Shantotto.
Bartz and the other squires stared a bit at that. "Cecil, aren't you married?" Tidus asked finally.
"I had other lovers before I married," said Cecil.
"But... You're married to a woman."
"Yes, I am."
"But..."
Firion and Cecil exchanged looks and laughed. "Ah, the folly of youth," said Cecil, chuckling. "Just because the heart lies in one direction one time doesn't mean that it can't settle somewhere else."
"You're attracted to someONE, after all," said Firion. "Depending how strongly you're attracted to certain parts of their body, you're gay, straight, or bisexual. Seems a bit arbitrary."
Bartz, Tidus, Zidane, and Squall looked very confused. Cloud privately saw the sense of what Firion and Cecil were saying, and wondered what that said about him. Firion was gay as the day as long, but Cecil apparently swung both ways. Which one was Cloud?
"Well... I don't think I've ever been attracted to a man before... Or a woman, for that matter."
Did that mean there was something wrong with him? Cloud honestly didn't know, and he wasn't really that surprised. Up until the age of ten, he hadn't exactly had the most normal upbringing, and even after Luc had saved him, Squall, and Tidus from a life of slavery or worse, life hadn't been... Well, what it was supposed to be for a child. And Luc only been 19 when he'd taken on three young boys, and not at all prepared to teach them much of anything except how not to get kidnapped again. And that had been a great gift, the greatest. But now...
"I don't know who to talk to about this. Or... Anything, really."
During the whole talk about kissing and sexuality, Luc hadn't turned around once. But Cecil and Firion had shown they were open to discussion and some imparting of wisdom. Maybe sometime in the future...
"When things actually change, I'll talk to them."
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A/N: I find it impossible to write more than one Sephiroth at a time. Either I write PYLO Sephiroth, Unlikely Partnership Sephiroth, or Dissonance Sephiroth. They all act different, which makes things somewhat confusing for me. It's like seeing black, warmer black, and cooler black. You can guess which one is which.
And yes, Cecil is married to Rosa. I don't know enough of him to feel comfortable bucking canon, but at the same time, feel that he may be gay. And anyway, bisexual means just that: you are not gay/straight who occasionally likes members of the opposite/same gender. You are attracted to people regardless of gender. Also, just like straight people can get gay crushes, gay people can get straight crushes too. Not saying that Rosa is a straight cruch, but really-sexuality is an interesting, fluid thing. Even with men, and arguably, ESPECIALLY with fictional men :D
