Disclaimer: Stephenie Myer and associates own all Twilight characters/etc. I just want to play with them for a while and give them something new to do.


Chapter 7

(EPOV)

I was slightly awoken as Alice slid off the couch and covered me up, but I was too exhausted to move. Even as she began cleaning my room I could barely focus long enough to form a coherent thought, much less tell her to stop picking up after me like I was a child even though I was more than gracious for her help. I fell in and out of sleep as she worked and only feeling slightly guilty about letting her continue cleaning. It wasn't until I heard her cursing and stomping that I actually opened my eyes wide enough to see that my journal had hit her face. Instantly tensing I waited to see if she'd open it, and relief flooded through me when she just set it aside.

My journal and all of its contents were not something I ever wanted to show anyone. The weakness I poured into the pages served to keep me from going insane with grief and falling into a deep and noticeable depression. The truth is, I refused to let her go. Trying to forget her was like trying to forget how to breathe. She was my best friend and I was honestly in love with her. I always had been. Eleven years of separation hadn't changed that one bit.

I filled the pages of my ever expanding 'diary' with memories, hopes, nightmares and dreams of her. Rarely was there a page that wasn't dedicated to her. It probably seems completely crazy to have a book full of thoughts about one person, but it was those thoughts that kept me hoping she'd come back someday. The first day of high school was the day I'd been dreading would come for years.

I opened my eyes again as I heard a sharp intake of breath from Alice. As I moved my head as quietly as I could to get a better look at the source of her shock, I realized what she was holding and what had fallen out of it. I was royally fucked now. If I revealed that I was awake I was bound to face the Spanish Inquisition and possibly have my head ripped off because I would refuse to answer her questions: not a good idea. But if I just lay here and let her into my personal world maybe she would be able to forgive me. Maybe she would see what has been plaguing me for the past three years: not great, but definitely better than plan A.

So here's the 50:50 of why Alice might kick my ass even when she reads my journal: I have pictures of Marie. Not just pictures from when we were kids. I mean I have pictures of her from the first four years she'd been gone. And I never shared them with Alice.

The day school started back again after Marie had been taken away I begged Carlisle to take me over to Charlie's house. Seeing how upset Alice and I had been over the months since our best friend's removal he agreed and even suggested that we bring Alice. I don't know why but I asked him to keep it a secret. I told him that Alice going over there would probably upset Charlie even more since she slept over there on a regular basis growing up.

The first visit was hard. Charlie actually cried in front of me, apologizing the whole time of course. We talked about Marie for about an hour before he suddenly stood up and walked in to the kitchen. He came back with a sad look on his face and handed me and envelope. "Pick one," was all he said. Inside the envelope were several pictures of Marie. I carefully looked at each and every one before selecting one where she look most like the happy girl she was when we were hanging out. I hugged Charlie as tight as I could and thanked him profusely for the gift he'd just given me. He promised that I could have one every time she sent them, which she'd promised him she'd do by the first of every school year.

For four years I spent the afternoon with Charlie after the first day of school reading the letters she'd sent and looking through pictures. Freshman year it all changed. There were no pictures. School had even started a week late due to building renovations. In my mind it could only mean that she wasn't coming back. And with that realization, my world came crashing down around me. I gave up on everything. My heart froze over and my smile never fully came back.

I noticed the tears streaming down my cheeks and went to wipe them, forgetting that I had company. I looked over to see Alice staring at me with a look of hurt, relief, anger, and love but most of all understanding. She now knew what had really happened, and she seemed sympathetic.

What a relief.

(BPOV)

Being with Alice almost made it feel like I'd never left. She accepted me with open arms despite my complete silence for seven years. It was too hard to deal with being ripped away from home when as it was without having to hear how much I was missing from so far away. I'd begged Renee to let me come back and visit, but her refusal was solid.

I got home before Charlie even though we'd been at the beach till dusk. I began making dinner for him as a surprise. I put it in the oven and ran upstairs to shower and change. I was brushing my hair when I noticed a box wrapped up like a present, hideous bow and all, sitting on my desk. I quickly tore open the paper and peered inside. Nestled in the stuffing was a delicate silver ring. As I lifted it out of the box, tears began streaming down my face. I recognized the claddagh design instantly and looked inside the band for any engravings. Sure enough 'Always' was written inside. Edward had given me the ring for my tenth birthday and I had never taken it off till the day I left. Renee had practically ripped it off my finger and threw it at Charlie. I quickly looked around for a card or note of some sort that I might have missed and found a piece of the wrapping paper that had writing on it. I recognized Charlie's messy scrawl. 'Just be you baby girl,' was all it said.

Charlie came home and thanked me for the dinner before settling down in front of the TV to watch the game. His wink and glance at my left hand was enough for me to know he understood how grateful I was to have my ring back.

After cleaning the kitchen back up and finishing my homework I grabbed my iPod and went to bed. It had been a long day and I had a feeling tomorrow was going to be even harder.