Chapter 6- This Bird is NOT the Word
After the butterfly flew away, Alice looked down at the mushroom we were sitting on. She then picked off two pieces of it, one from different sides of the mushroom.
"One side will make us-" she started, but then paused. She shrugged thoughtfully. "But which is which?"
My only worry was that this mushroom wasn't poisonous. And that Alice would actually use her head for once.
She then looked as though she were going to put the mushroom pieces down.
"After all that's happened, I-," she said to herself, "I wonder if I … I don't care."
Before I could stop her, Alice ate a huge chunk of one of the mushroom pieces. I began flailing my arms and making weird, breathy noises to contain my disbelief. After a while, I managed to blurt out, "ARE YOU CRAZY!"
"Pinocchio, please," she said annoyed. "I'm tired of being only three inches high-"
Then, before one could say, "You jinxed it,", Alice began to grow at a rapid rate. She soon got so big that her head was sticking out from the tops of the trees. I propelled myself up to her ginormous face.
"I told you so," I said snarkily, and then began sniggering. I was laughing so hard that I almost didn't notice Alice's hand trying to swat at me. I had to fly out of the way multiple times to avoid the blows. "Okay, okay! Geez!"
Then, there was a sudden screaming from above.
"A serpent!" the voice screeched. It was a bird with a pink bonnet and glasses, and she did not look happy. Apparently, Alice had grown so large that she accidentally got this bird's nest stuck in her hair. The bird then began to fly around, screaming about Alice being a serpent.
"Oh, but - please! Please!" Alice tried to reason with the bird, but that didn't work.
"Off with you!" the bird yelled. "Shoo! Shoo! Go away! SERPENT! SERPENT!"
"But I'm not a serpent!" Alice said.
The bird then stopped flying around in its frantic state.
"Indeed?" she said skeptically. "Then, just what are you?"
"I'm just a little girl."
"Little? LITTLE!" The bird began to laugh at Alice's statement.
"Well, I am! I - I mean, I was."
"Yeah, before you decided not to use your head again," I muttered. I then had to dodge another swat from Alice.
"And I suppose you don't eat eggs, either?" the bird asked angrily.
Please don't say yes, I begged silently. Please don't say yes.
"Yes, I do, but - but - but," Alice stammered, but the bird kept interrupting her. I was just about done with this girl
"I knew it!" the bird screeched. "I knew it! SERPENT! SERPEEEEEEEENT!" The bird then began to fly around Alice's head frantically. I had to get out of its way a couple of times to avoid collision with it.
"Oh, for goodness sake!" Alice yelled, just about having enough of this bird's crap. She then looked at both of the mushroom pieces that she still had in her hand thoughtfully. Her eyes then brightened. "And the other side will …." She then ate a piece from the other mushroom part that she had. Two seconds later, Alice began to shrink as fast as she had grown. I zoomed downward to meet up with her. And I honestly didn't even cared if the bird was okay or not.
When I found her, she had fallen on her butt, but was, thankfully, okay.
"Goodness," she breathed, getting up. "I wonder if I'll ever get the knack of it."
"How about this time you use your brain!" I said, pointing at my head.
Alice gave me a murderous look, but then went back to the mushrooms. She looked at them in silence for a few moments and then spoke.
"That's it!" she cried. "Pinocchio, get over here and lick this thing with me.
I gave Alice a look that was both disgusted and that said have-you-lost-your-mind.
"Just do it," she hissed.
Shrugging, I walked over to her.
"If I get sick, it's going to be your fault," I said moodily.
We both then licked the piece of mushroom. And, just like Mario, we both grew back to our regular size.
"There, that's much better," Alice said happily. She then eyed the mushrooms. "Hmm, better save these." She put the mushroom pieces in her apron pockets.
"Yeah, and you should probably stop ticking people off today," I said snarkily and began laughing. But then I felt a sudden pain in my nose and noticed that Alice was twisting it. I pulled away quickly. "Ow! My nose!" I had to hold my nose, making me yell in that type of voice that people make when they're holding their nose.
"'Ow, my nose,'" Alice mocked.
Now I was seething with anger. "You know, Alice," I said, "one of these days, I'm going to give you a wedgie and we're going to both be in trouble."
"How would I be in trouble?"
"Because you would be the one who would provoke me to do it!"
"Then I'll just twist your nose again."
"Stuck up!"
"Idiot!"
"Brat!"
"Moron!"
We continued to squabble as we walked deeper into the forest.
Author's Note:
Hi everyone. Sorry this one is so late. School, once again, got in the way. Enjoy and happy Thanksgiving
