I'd say poor Anders, but I'm still angry about the ending of DA2 and how dare he spoil the wonderful personality he had in Awakening? Oh well. ./endrant. Enjoy!
Ch. 7, in which Isabela teases, Orsino sighs, Anders confesses, and Hawke falls asleep.
"What, not going to see the First Enchanter tonight?" Varric sat down across the table in the common room at the Hanged Man with a grin, and Lise blinked at him, then raised an eyebrow.
"Why, should I be? Is there an occasion I missed? Is there a reason I can't just come and see my friends when I want to?"
"Oh, come on, Hawke. You've been spending half your time up in the Gallows, and the other half of the time he's become a fixture in your study."
She sighed. "And what, I'm not allowed to have any friends who aren't you guys? Give me a break. You and Fenris visit as much as he does!"
"Yes, beautiful, but I'm me. That doesn't count. And Fenris happens to be sleeping with your servant." The dwarf chuckled, flagging down Edwina and ordering an ale for each of them.
Hawke grimaced at him. "Thanks for that mental image, Varric. I really didn't need to think about Fenris and Orana."
"Oooooh, tight leather and silver tattoos, nom. I'll think about that any time. Why are we giving Hawke hell? What did I miss?" Isabela sauntered up to the table with a bottle of whiskey in one hand and a pack of cards in the other.
Varric gave her a conspiratorial grin. "Well, Rivaini, it just so happens that Hawke has a new friend that Anders doesn't seem to approve of."
The pirate scoffed. "Anders doesn't approve of a lot of things, so that doesn't mean much. And that stick-up-the-arse spirit is even worse."
"Yes, but this happens to be the First Enchanter."
Isabela grinned slowly. "Ooooh, Hawke. I never pegged you as one who went for men in power. I figured you'd like to be the one calling the shots." She winked, and Lise threw up her hands, though she blushed.
"There is nothing between Orsino and me! Maker! He's a good friend and sometimes it's nice to have an adult conversation, you know! Plus, the rest of you are horrible at chess." Varric and Isabela laughed as Hawke rolled her eyes at them over the rim of her mug.
Just then, Fenris came walking up. He put a hand on the back of her chair. "Alright, why is it 'bait Hawke' night?"
"We're just giving her hell about the First Enchanter, elf."
Fenris rolled his eyes, taking a seat next to Lise. "Why? He's respectable and pleasant enough, I suppose."
Everyone turned to look at him, and Isabela's mouth actually hung open.
"Who are you and what have you done with Broody?" Varric pretended to faint.
Fenris shrugged, taking the bottle of wine Edwina brought over. "Hawke asked me to get to know him, so I have. He's a mage, and he'll probably turn into an abomination some day and kill us all, but until then I have no complaints with his manners."
Isabela shook her head. "You were so much sexier when you were angsty." Fenris rolled his eyes again, and she sat down beside Varric. "All right, people. Let's have a hand before the other elf and the angry, glowy thing get here."
An hour later, Anders and Merrill had joined the group. Anders sat down next to Lise, and as they were in the middle of a hand, sat his chin on her shoulder and tried to give her advice about which cards to play. She finally shoved him away. "Anders, you're cheating. And if I take your advice, I'll lose."
Varric and Isabela exchanged looks where Hawke couldn't see them, as Anders then proceeded to pout at her. She sighed. "You don't even like dogs, Anders, so stop trying to give me the puppy eyes. They don't work." Then, across the table to Varric. "And what are the two of you whispering about?" The dwarf and the pirate exchanged glances and then laughed. Lise sighed. "I have a feeling I'm going to get trounced tonight, and badly."
The evening was winding down to a close when an exhausted-looking Aveline, still in Guard-Captain regalia, came in and sat down at the end of the table. "Maker, what a week."
Fenris slid his bottle over and she took it with a nod of thanks. "They had us surrounding the Gallows for the last three days while the templars did a thorough search of every common area inside the buildings. The only places they weren't allowed to go were the mages' quarters, except for the apprentice barracks which have folks in and out of them every few weeks anyhow."
Anders gripped the table, angrily. "What in Thedas makes them think they have the right-" he gritted his teeth. "What were they looking for, conspiracies? Hidden bombs?'
Lise looked at him. "Can you stop thinking about terrorism for a moment?" He glared back at her. "This actually had nothing to do with the mages inside the tower. Apparently that fringe group is still trying to break Feynriel out of the Gallows and Meredith was afraid that there was a hidden passage they might be able to use."
Anders had opened his mouth to sneer at Meredith's name, but he blanched at her last remark. She shook her head. "They won't find it, Anders. Don't worry."
"How do you know?" He scowled.
"Because apparently there was a fire in that room – out of control experiment or something like that – and Orsino personally oversaw the installation of a new statue of Andraste over the burned place so as to hide the damage. And strangely enough, the statue just so happens to be hollow, and there just so happens to be room behind it. It's a tight fit, and there's no way the templars could have found it." She smirked.
At the other end of the table, Aveline was pretending to be very interested in a story Fenris was telling her so as to not 'hear' the conversation between Hawke and Anders.
Anders' eyes widened, and he looked livid. "How did he even find out?"
"I didn't tell him, if that's what you're trying to say. He's not an idiot, you know. When he mentioned it to me, I asked him if there was any way he could keep it hidden."
"Well, there goes that, then. The mage underground is ruined – there's no way I'm going to stick my peoples' necks out like that. If he knows, it's lost."
"For fade's sake, Anders! Stop being an ass! 'Your people'? He's one of your people! Orsino is on your side, you know? You could do worse than to trust him."
Anders pushed himself away from the table and stalked off.
"Well, that was awkward," Varric said.
Aveline rolled her eyes. "That man is going to break some day."
"He needs to get laid, if you ask me. It certainly made Fenris relax." Isabela looked at Hawke. "You two are angry at each other enough that I bet the sex would be great."
Fenris scowled. "That's not even funny, Isabela."
Lise looked daggers at her friend. "It's certainly not."
The Guard-Captain cleared her throat, changing the subject. "I can't stay any longer – I'm about to drop. But I figured you'd like to know, Hawke, that the curfew in the Gallows is lifted and you can go visit again."
Varric turned to Hawke with a slow grin. "Just wanted to see us, eh?"
She turned bright red. "I did! I would have been here anyway; it's been over a week since I last visited!"
"Sure, sure. You keep telling yourself that." The dwarf laughed and slid her winnings across the table as she got up to go.
"If you guys keep it up, the only people I'll invite to Midwinter will be Aveline, Merrill, and Fenris."
"So you're still having it? You're not going to host some fancy society party?" Isabela looked disgruntled.
Lise laughed. "Sorry I couldn't invite most of you to Sebastian's party, but honestly - I shouldn't have even been there except that I was the host. And you didn't miss anything. No one was that attractive, and there was an under-abundance of alcohol."
The pirate scoffed. "Never mind then. You nobles are boring."
"You know that's not true, Izzy. But yes, I am holding Midwinter like usual. Do you think I'd miss it? I'll get everyone more information once I've talked it over with mother – I'm sure she'll want to do something a little fancier this year."
As she put on her cloak and scarf, Fenris got up. "I'm calling it a night, too. Have a good one, everyone. I'll walk you home, Hawke." She nodded, waved to the group, and the two stepped out into the cold night.
Days were short now, and when she sniffed at the moonlight she could smell a hint of snow. "Wouldn't it be wonderful to have a white Midwinter?"
Fenris gave a non-committal grunt, turning his own dark cloak up further around his ears.
"You don't say."
He shrugged. "It's cold, and it's wet. It rarely snowed in Minrathous, and never in Seheron."
They walked for a while in companionable silence. Then, as they reached the stairs into Hightown, she pushed back her hood, turning to look at him. "Thanks, Fen."
"About?" He paused, one hand on the railing.
"Orsino. What you said back there. I knew you'd been making an effort to come over when you knew he'd be there, but I didn't realize it had done any good."
Fenris shrugged again. "It has and it hasn't, Hawke. I'd still rather he be out of your life, part and parcel. But I can see that you care about him, and I also realize that even with him gone, Anders and Merrill would still be here. Orsino's a damn sight more reliable than they are. I'm not going to say he's sane, necessarily, but if you have to spend time with a mage, I'd rather it be him. Anders is growing more and more unstable."
She nodded, her eyes dark and worried. "I've noticed that. We fight so much these days... I don't even know why. I mean, yes, it's the mages. It's his damn refusal to bend in the slightest – he goes out of his way to pick fights. But I see the look in his eyes, and I think even he doesn't want to be as contrary as he is." She sighed. "And the worst part is, I don't know if there's any way to make it any better."
Fenris gave her a level look. "When the dog becomes mad, the only thing to be done is put it out of its misery."
Hawke frowned deeply. "Don't say that again, Fen. He's a living, thinking man, and he's not crazy. He can control this, I know he can. He just needs to learn how. He's my friend, and I'll stand by him unless there's just no other options." She shook her head. "I don't- I don't want to talk about this. It's bad enough that I dread him coming to visit because I don't want to deal with his snarkiness towards Orsino. I don't want to think about the possibility of things getting worse."
It was mid-afternoon the next day before Lise finally got the last of the herbs and vegetables out of her garden, covering the rest so that it could go dormant in the cold ground. Now, the only things she'd have to tend to were the hardy winter-grasses and shrubs that she'd planted.
She was cleaning up, trying to go over a list of books she needed to return to Orsino that night when she heard Anders' voice downstairs. "Hawke? Hawke, are you home?"
Holding a towel, she went to the top of the stairs. "Anders? Is something wrong?"
He was standing in the foyer, patting Rufus absentmindedly, swinging a bag in the other hand. When she came into view, he smiled, looking a bit shame-faced, and held it up. "I wanted to come by and say I'm sorry. Maybe spend the evening together, talking. We haven't done that in a while."
Lise very carefully finished drying her hands, thinking. She was really looking forward to seeing Orsino tonight. It had been several days, and she... well, she missed him. Nothing strange about that.
But she didn't have the heart to say no to Anders. He was one of her oldest friends in Kirkwall, and it had been a while since they'd spent any time together, just talking. He looked like he was in a good enough mood, and perhaps with a pleasant enough night she'd be able to get him to relax a little. Stop being angry at every little thing. She sighed quietly, thinking a bit wistfully of chess and green eyes, then smiled at him.
"That sounds lovely, Anders. Make yourself at home in the study? I'll need to send out a few notes and then I'll be free for the rest of the evening. We can eat there, as mother won't be home until late."
The mage nodded. "How is Leandra?"
"Fine. She's become close friends with Flora Harriman since we cleared out that mess in their cellar. Poor girl feels absolutely distraught over what her mother did to Sebastian's family. I think mother's a sort of surrogate replacement to her." She sat down at her desk to pen a letter to Orsino.
Anders watched the pen scratch silently, then raised an eyebrow as she wrapped up a few books, a bottle of cider, and tied the note to the top. "Was I interrupting your evening?"
Lise smiled. "You were, but that's all right. We haven't spent time together in far too long – my plans will wait a bit." She went to the kitchen and, opening a side door, she whistled shrilly. Moments later, a small boy, no more than ten, came running up. "Messere Hawke?"
She gave him the parcel and some silver pieces. "Take this to the Gallows and deliver it to the First Enchanter, will you? If they won't let you in, give it to Knight-Captain Cullen – you can tell him that Serah Hawke sent it. And then make sure you get something warm to eat." She gave him a stern look. "Have you all found places to sleep now, out of the cold?"
The boy shrugged. "For th' most part, milady. Dorrie an' Cutter found a woman in Darktown who'll put 'em up if'n they sweep the passages. Rhodie's in with that Ferelden lady in Lowtown, but I don't know about Wasp or Jemmie."
"And you, Wolf?" She put a hand on her hip.
He shrugged again. "Reckon I can find somewhere t'sleep with this." He held up one of the silver pieces.
Lise shook her head. "Not good enough. You know that shed down in the bottom of the garden? It's empty and clean. I'll put some bedding in there – make sure you get Wasp and Jemmie and if they don't have anywhere to sleep, the three of you come back. That way the lot of you can come and go without giving Lady Leandra or Bodahn a heart attack."
The boy blinked up at her, and then grinned. "Thanks, messere!" He then ran off, quick as lightning, and she smiled.
"You'd make a good mother, Hawke." She turned to see Anders in the doorway, and shook her head, smiling. "No, I mean it."
"I wouldn't. I'm too fickle, too flighty, and too impulsive, and I can't even keep you lot in check. But thank you." She smiled at him. "Come on back to the study. You brought wine, didn't you?"
He grinned. "Guilty as accused, messere."
Orsino finished placing the pieces on the chessboard before the fire, next to the chairs they always used. He smiled down at the board – it was getting to be evening and Hawke should be along any time.
Just then, there was a knock at his door. He opened it, expecting Hawke, but instead found Ser Cullen, who handed him a wrapped bundle with a note attached. "Excuse my interruption, First Enchanter, but a young man just dropped this off for you. He says it's from Serah Hawke."
Orsino looked alarmed, taking the bundle. Cullen cleared his throat, embarrassed. "Do you mind if I watch you open it? If word gets back to the Knight-Commander that I passed you a wrapped bundle without first seeing what was inside..."
The First Enchanter sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Of course, Knight-Captain. I just appreciate that you gave it to me first." Cullen nodded, and Orsino unwrapped the books and bottle. He uncorked it. "Bodahn's cider. Would you like a mug?" He realized that this meant she was most likely not coming tonight, but tried his best to hide his disappointment before the templar.
Cullen shook his head, still looking embarrassed. "No, thank you, First Enchanter. I'm sorry to trouble you – I'll leave you to it, then. Have a good evening."
When the door closed, Orsino broke the seal on the letter.
"Dear friend," it read.
"Aveline told me yesterday – too late at night in my opinion – that the curfew was lifted, and I was delighted to hear it. I'm glad Meredith has calmed down a bit. I had every plan to come visit you tonight, no matter how busy you might be, but Anders came by and as we had a fight last night I felt it was more politic for me to stay and make it up with him. I feel a bit bad, as I've known him for years, but spend so little time with him now. I hope you are not too disappointed in me – even though we made no definite plans, I know. But I know you, and am sure you'll just spend your night engrossed in a book and forget all about me. Just know that I miss you horribly and that diamondback is no substitute for a good game of chess in front of the fire.
I will see you tomorrow, I hope, unless you send word that you will be too busy.
Yours affectionately, Elisebeth Hawke"
Orsino sat down in the chair he'd set aside for her and sighed, looking at the glasses laid out beside her favourite Orlesian wine. It wasn't the first time he'd felt a bit like an old fool, once he was gone and away from her company. But then he shook his head, and stood up, resolutely. "It's not even been a week – I can handle another day. It's not like I didn't spend every evening alone before we met; I've just grown used to the warmth of company. I'll take her advice and lose myself in a book – although I'm not going to just forget."
He rummaged through the pile she sent him and pulled one out, then put up the glasses, set the chessboard aside where it would not get knocked to the ground, and banked the fire. After a moment, he carefully folded the note and placed it in his desk; but before he locked the drawer he looked down and wondered, for the first time, just what Hawke and Anders' relationship was.
Several hours, two bottles of wine, and a good dinner later, the two friends sat on the divan in front of the fire. Both were more than a little tipsy.
"So what," asked Anders, gesturing with his glass, "is with the pile of urchins you've acquired?"
Lise blinked at him. "You mean Wolf and company?" She sat up, swearing. "I forgot to fix up the shed. Bodahn!"
"Messere?" The dwarf looked in at the study door.
"The shed. I told Wolf and-"
"It's already done, messere. I overheard you talking to the young man and figured you'd be busy with company."
"You're a lifesaver, Bodahn. Thank you."
"Will you need anything else?"
"No thank you. Anders will see himself out, eventually. Good night, Bodahn."
"Good night, messere."
She turned back to Anders, looking relieved. "Well, I was always having to send bloody notes – not really bloody, you know, although sometimes with what we get into..." she blinked again. "Anyway. I sent so many notes to you and Fen and Varric and Aveline and everyone else – at least Izzy and Varric live in the same damn place – that we found ourselves with a surplus of children who all wanted to run our errands and earn our coin. So instead, I've set them to just keeping their eyes and ears open around the city – little spies, if you will – and any time we're looking into something they usually manage to find me at least some information I can use. And they're still good for carrying your damn letters." She sank back against the divan, draining her glass. "Whoo. I think that's a bit of enough for me, or I'll never get out of bed tomorrow."
Anders smiled down at her. "It's been a while since we talked like this, hasn't it, Hawke?"
She returned the smile, looking up at him. "It has. It's good to see you smile, Anders. You don't do it enough."
His smile faded a little as he looked down into her bright green eyes, glittering in the firelight. Maker, but she was so beautiful... she was still looking up at him, and he leaned closer to her lips, beginning to close his eyes.
All of the sudden she pushed him away. "Careful, Anders. Don't fall asleep on me, it's far too warm in here and you're too heavy, and too drunk." She sat back carefully as he opened his eyes, confused. It was apparent that the moment was broken – or had only been in his mind.
He turned his head away, and spoke, a little bitterly. "The only reason I can smile is because you're by my side, Hawke. Sometimes I think that's the only thing that keeps me sane, keeps Justice in check. You mean so much more to me than I could ever say..."
She was silent, and he looked back at her in time to catch her as she slid along the back of the divan, fast asleep. He sighed, carefully setting her down to lie across the couch. Standing up, he looked down at her for a long while, then shook his head. "I love you, Hawke, but I'm not foolish enough to think you feel the same way. We may be friends, but I'm just an abomination, after all." Shrugging, he picked up the rest of the last bottle of wine and slipped out the back door to make his way home.
The characters all belong to Bioware, I just play with - and sometimes torment - them.
