[Onyx's Note:: I hope you're enjoying the story^_^ I am...and it's been slightly theraputic, you might say. Especially now... I've had a death in the family, as of last night...and I'm struggling to cope with it. And in my way of mourning, I'm writing...continuing this story. Hopefully it'll be nice and twisted and won't get too weird for anyone. On that note, I want to say thank you again for everyone who's been following along. And as always, please...enjoy!]
*Back to the Present*
Onyx holds back the sob that's lodged itself in the back of her throat at the memory of that night… Emotions shared…truths brought to light… The thing she really is…a Slayer… And that truth died the day she felt Dean's life slip into the void. She's connected to both Winchesters you see… She can sense their mood swings and sometimes their thoughts… So when Dean was attacked by Lilith's pet Hellhound…she felt that pain before his heart stopped. Onyx felt Dean slip away from her while she was outside helping Bobby with the sprinkler system.
She felt a part of herself literally die…taken with Dean's last breath.
Onyx pushes her memories from her mind and remembers why she's going back to memory lane… Sam's presence…knowing he, himself would never hurt her on his own…wanting so badly to feel safe again and feel him wrap himself around her… But after last night, after what he did…what he almost…
She shivers and clenches her eyes shut.
His scent alone, one that she's always lavished in, making her feel completely and utterly safe… Is now flashing red on her inner radar. It sparks a wave of fear to swim through her blood, causing icy fingers of anxiety to slide the length of her spine.
Sam inches into the dark room and notices that for a moment it seems as though she's shaking… He tries to focus on her, trying desperately not to startle her as he closes the door behind him and starts towards the bed.
Onyx can feel him approaching her…she even hears the very faint click of the door closing into its frame. She finds herself silencing her breath, listening to the fabric of his clothes brushing up against the mattress. He's so careful, so quiet…afraid to wake her.
She feels her chest ache, torn between the sheer terror of what he's capable of doing to her…what he was going to do to her…but for some reason all she wants to do is feel him wrap himself around her, holding her in his arms.
The knight in shinning armor can't be the savior and the villain. It's one or the other…no shades of gray. Her brain screams into itself…confliction barely describing the chaos slamming her senses. She needs to feel safe again, needs him more than anything else in this fucked up existence…
But what has he done to her since Dean was taken out of their lives? Abandoned her, cheated on her and when she finally decides to face him, she's forced to stop him from drinking himself into a permanent coma… Watching over him as he slept… Crying silently in the dark as he tossed and turned on that cheap motel bed…the one now soaked in her blood…
Anger begins to rear its destructive head causing a small fire to spill through her tired veins. Nasty images begin to dance through her mind as she thinks about how easily it could've been to strangle him as he slept. How perfect it would've been to tie him up, leave him there, hunt down Ruby and bring her back… Have him watch as she used Ruby's demon killing blade to cut the life out of her corpse. How simple it would have been…
If she truly went flip side, that is…
He can sense she's conscious of him as he finally climbs onto the mattress and lies facing her, behind her. The bed makes a soft creak of protest as his weight settles against the old springs, but she doesn't react. Sam feels a large wave of guilt press against his chest as Onyx curls her body into a fetal position. He knows the pain he's put her through…and there's no excuse for any of it. Especially the part where he slept with Ruby… God what the hell was he thinking? He wasn't…he was drinking, not dealing with Dean's death. He'd pushed Onyx away and ended up being tracked down by Ruby…
Something about that doesn't sit right with him. But he lets it go…as soon as Onyx's rough whisper of a voice catches his attention.
"I don't hate you…" Is all she can say as she clutches the pillow and cringes at the pain that's slowly fading from her face. It's now being replaced with a strange pulsing, meaning her adrenaline is causing her body to heal at a very fast rate…faster than usual.
Sam's swallows the hard lump of resentment at how broken she sounds and replies, "I'm sorry." His voice a soft sound that if she wasn't right in front of him, wouldn't have heard it. "You know I'd never hurt you…"
Onyx clenches her eyes shut, takes a deep, shaky breath and lets it out slowly. She opens her eyes and peers into the darkness, fighting an inner battle over her very strained emotions. "Don't, Sam…" She begins to say, her voice a little stronger, "just…let it go."
His brow furrows at her words when a small wave of dread washes over him. The feeling that she's finally shut herself off from him. "Not after what happened, I can't." He replies and curls up directly behind her and feels his heart break when she trembles when he very tentatively wraps himself protectively around her. Sam doesn't back off because her right hand takes a hold of his and clutches it against her chest, right above her heart.
"I know you'd never hurt me…physically." She mutters with a cold edge to her voice and begins to squeeze down on his much bigger hand and doesn't realize she's close to crushing the very delicate bones with her strength. She hears him let out a shocked grunt at the sudden pressure. "Sorry, I'm a little out of it." She lies and tries to remind herself that she needs to pay attention to what she's doing or she'll end up severely hurting him.
…Or maybe that's exactly what he deserves…a little piece of pissed off Slayer to remind him who he's really dealing with. Dean knew, before he died…and he never told Sammy. Never warned him of how incredibly dangerous Onyx would become if she was ever forced off the edge.
Onyx had told Dean the story of the two original Slayers… And that Faith was the dark shadow of Buffy, (whom even to this day, had never really become friends with her because Buffy had seen Onyx as another Faith…if not worse) and that in a worst case scenario, any Slayer could turn dark side because in every Slayer was a hint of Demon blood.
Which was another reason why Onyx had felt a connection with Sammy in the first place. They were both carrying something from birth that would always have them labeled as 'Freaks'. And even now, she can feel that instinctive yearning to be close to him because their souls understand each other.
But in the case of This broken hearted woman… The anger out weighs the instinct. The mind fills the heart with hate and swells the blood with liquid fire, singeing the veins, forcing the body to heal, the adrenaline to rise… The rage to awaken. Bringing the darker side of the Slayer to the surface.
Sam let's out another soft grunt at the incredible pressure she has on his much larger hand…and this time, she doesn't let up, but instead…keeps squeezing until a hiss of pain echoes from his bruised lips. "Onyx, let up!" He exclaims into the consuming darkness and hears a very soft chuckling as her body begins to shake.
The pain no longer restraining her, confining her to remain in one place, she turns her body towards him. "Get out." Her voice is a controlled growl of warning as he pulls his now pulsing hand protectively against his body. She doesn't want this… She can't have her rage consume her.
She'd never be able to live with herself if she hurt him. Twisted? You have no idea…
"Wait…what?" Sam mutters in question, slightly confused at her sudden burst of strength. She shouldn't be able to move like that…not with the way he'd…
She grits her teeth and feels the pressure rising against her ribcage. Not a good sign. "I said… Get. Out." Onyx repeats herself, slowly this time, hoping that by just the sound of her voice, he'll get the point. "Please Sammy, I don't want to hurt you."
He furrows his brow, unable to see her face in the darkness, needing so badly to see what's going in her beautiful eyes. "You're serious…" Sam rumbles in a low voice, weary of the weird waves of energy that's pooling from her body.
She nods and realizes he can't see her. "I'm dead serious. If you don't leave, I will hurt you." Onyx explains in a cold voice, trying so desperately to keep the animalistic growl from reaching her lips. "There's something about me you don't know…and I'd rather you never find out."
Thoroughly unnerved at this point, Sam tries to understand what she just said and feels a pulse of pain sweep from his fingertips up to his elbow, reminding him of how easily it was for her to damn near crush the intricate bones in his hand. "What are you keeping from me, Onyx?" His voice is a low rumble, carefully empty as it dances into the charged air.
She fights back the evil grin wanting to curl her bruised lips and decides to do the only thing that will stop this situation from escalating. In a speed too fast for anyone in her broken condition, she pushes the blankets down, jumps up onto her feet and leaps from her place on the bed, flies over Sam and lands quietly on her feet next to the door, turns the knob, opens the door and turns to look at his shocked expression when she flips the light switch on.
His confusion reaches a new high as he blinks back the slight sting of the light suddenly pooling in his eyes. He sits up and turns his body towards the door, where she's standing…and notices for the first time…how terrible the bruises look on her face.
Sam throws his legs off the edge of the mattress and goes to speak when he literally watches as the dark color of the bruises seem to…fade before his very eyes. It's a very slow process you see, but if you watch closely, you can see her face healing…
"Onyx? What are you…" Bobby's voice fades off when she gives him the full force of her angry gaze. He'd just been walking by her room when he heard movement inside and saw the door open and light pool out into the hallway. Now he's standing here, face calm, a slight raise in his brow at the difference of her condition. Girl should be stuck in that bed for the next Seventy Two hours… But here she is, her face already showing signs of healing that should take place a week from now.
"You're up…" Bobby says in his calm rumble of a voice and senses somethin' isn't right. He peers over to Sam who's sitting at the edge of the bed, cradling his right hand in his left with a worried look on his face. Bobby furrows his brow, "you uh…doin' alright over there, Sam?"
Sam swallows back another hard lump and averts his eyes from Bobby, "I'm fine Bobby…just, laid down wrong." He lies and gazes up at Onyx for a moment, telling Bobby what really happened.
"Is that right?" Bobby chimes thoughtfully and turns only his gaze to Onyx standing next to the door frame, her bruises appearing to lighten before his very eyes.
There's an uncomfortable silence in the air when Onyx stares down Bobby, as if trying to warn him that there's something very wrong with her and she's trying protect Sam from it.
They've always been able to do that, look at each other and know what was wrong without having to speak a word of it out loud.
"I'm hungry." Onyx says suddenly, her voice a hair away from sounding guttural when she walks past Bobby with a grace and speed no one in her condition should have, and vanishes down the hallway towards the old kitchen.
Sam finally gets to his feet and walks over to Bobby, who's also sharing the same odd expression. Sam says nothing, knowing that his surrogate father is still very angry with him at what he's done to Onyx to make her act like this…even if Bobby doesn't show it, Sammy can feel it.
"You hungry?" Bobby asks, keeping his eyes forward.
Sam nods and can't help but look and sound pitiful. "Yes, sir."
Bobby takes his hat off with his left hand and runs his right hand through his hair before replacing his hat back on his head and lets out a sigh. "C'mon then." He murmurs and adds, "make sure that Wildcat doesn't get too friendly with the kitchen knives."
Sam cracks a small smile and follows Bobby's lead down the hallway towards the kitchen, a part of him uneasy about Onyx…because of what she'd just done to him. At how easily she'd damn near crushed his hand. He can't seem to wrap his brain around it as they enter the kitchen and Onyx is standing near the fridge, making a sandwich at the counter.
He peers at her for a moment and forces his eyes somewhere else. Sam not only feels the guilt from what he's done to her, but for her sudden…change. He tries to understand it, tries to rationalize it…when Bobby gets his attention by handing him an ice pack.
"Here, before it starts swellin'." He mumbles and gives Sam his calculating gaze for a moment, watches Sam nod in understanding and wanders back over to Onyx who seems to still be makin' a sandwich.
"Make enough for everyone, or ya gonna hog that monster to yerself?" Bobby chimes in a lighter tone, hoping he can calm whatever violent storm is brewing inside her.
Not paying attention, her mind held in white noise, Onyx pauses and notices she's made three very large sandwiches and doesn't remember doing it. She blinks and places the last piece of bread on the last sandwich and rests her hands, palm flat against the cool tile of the counter.
"I uh…" She murmurs, trying to fight back the fog she's in when she gives Bobby her confused eyes. "Made enough for everyone." Onyx adds and notices the way Bobby's gaze holds a hint of worry to what's really goin' on in her head.
He studies her for a moment and gives her a wink before helping her by taking two of the sandwiches, one for Sam and one for himself…so she doesn't have to do it. "Here Sasquatch," Bobby calls over his shoulder and turns in time to have Sam walk over and retrieve the sandwich with his good hand.
Onyx turns and just for a moment, meets Sam's guilt filled gaze. In just seconds, a flash of a memory slams against her scull causing her to clench her eyes shut and turn away.
*Flash Back*
"Stop whining, it's distracting." Sam sneers, ignoring her pleas and continues to work in a methodical fashion, using as much force as he can muster to get her naked as quickly as possible. "And stop struggling, it'll just hurt more…" He says and pauses, leans down, grabs a fistful of her hair and jerks her face within kissing distance of his and snarls with a sadistic smile, "…or better yet, please do. The more it hurts, the harder I'll fuck you." His voice trails off as he looks into her wide eyes and abruptly lets go of her hair, letting her head plop back onto the mattress so he can finish disrobing her.* * *
Sam makes the mistake of getting past Bobby and tries to put a reassuring hand on her back when she spins around, a nasty steak knife held in a white knuckled grip and slashes at his chest, tearing a perfect horizontal line across his shirt…
"NO!" Onyx bellows and stops, realizing what she's done…
Sam jumps back at just the right moment to only feel the cold air wash over his untouched flesh from where she damned near cut him.
Her eyes are wide with enraged terror as the memory slowly vanishes from her mind, allowing her to see what she just nearly did. "Oh gods…" Onyx's voice flows from her lips as a tortured whisper as the knife drops to the ground with a slight clang. She quickly looks between Sam to Bobby and feels her blood run cold. It's not just the shock on Sam's face that hurts her…it's the shocked look on Bobby's generally calm features that tells her something is seriously wrong.
"I…" She stammers and takes a deep breath. "Take me to the panic room Bobby…I need to see something."
"Uh, sure…" Bobby replies quietly, his eyes weary. "Sam you stay here…"
Onyx interrupts, "No, I want him to come too."
"I don't think that's a very smart idea." Bobby explains and maneuvers himself between her and Sam.
She brings her hand up, and lets out a sigh. "I won't hurt him… I just… Need you," Onyx pauses and gives Bobby and Sam her pain filled gaze, "both of you… I can't explain it. Please?"
Sam and Bobby exchange a worried look but decide it best to just take her down there, together.
* * * *
She walks the stairs on careful footsteps, the aches and pains becoming less…fading with every breath she takes. She can feel a fearful twisting growing in her stomach as they near the anti-demon panic-room. If she's right, and hopes to the gods she isn't… Well, there's gonna be one helluva surprise when they get her to the door.
As they approach the bottom of the stairs, Bobby ushers Sam over to stand next to him as he opens the steel door.
"Your turn, darlin'." Bobby announces and motions to the open door way leading into the room.
Taking a deep breath, she begins the small trek from the bottom of the stairs towards the steel doorframe. As Onyx walks, dreading the horrible feeling running through her healing body, she hears a very faint voice whispering gleefully in the back of her head.
"Must suck…knowing you've lost control of that pathetic thing you call en existence. Oh and let's not forget how simple minded they've all been. Making plans, trying to…appease their little brains with some kind of established…order. But you've never been like them, have you? The true Freak you are nestled in that bag of flesh you call a body. Didn't tell'em why you couldn't stay in Sunnydale, did you? Shame, shame… What they'll see when you walk through that door…what you are… An uncontrolled chaos…like me."
The voice fades with a sickening giggle, causing a small jolt of pain to hit behind her left eye…just as she gets to the open doorway to the panic room…
…and screams.
*End Part Seven-Chapter One*
