CHAPTER 6

LAUGHING STOCK

The herd continued walking down the path, heading off to find Brooke as they followed Buck wherever he went. Crash and Eddie were walking in the back and shuddering at the thought of the beast Buck had mentioned earlier.

"Do you think the beast will find Brooke?" Crash asked.

"Or more importantly...us?" Eddie asked.

"Rudy?" Buck gave them a look. "Are you joking? He's relentless. He knows all, sees all, eats all." He smiled. "So that's a yes." Everyone gave him a look from behind him. Buck turned around to see a gigantic butterfly staring at him. "Hey, get off my lawn! Go on! Shoo!" The butterfly got the message and flew off. Everyone had a shocking expression on their faces. "I knew that guy when he was a caterpillar. You know, before he came out."

"Do you live down here all on your own?" Crash asked.

"With no rules to follow and no responsibilities to take care of?" Eddie asked.

"Not a one," Buck said, "No limits. No dependents. It's incredible. It's the best life a single guy can have."

"Did you here that, Crash?" Eddie said.

"Yeah," Crash said, "This is our kind of place."

"Can we live here, Diego?"

"I don't know," Shira said, "It doesn't sound like a good idea living around that guy."

"Hello?" Buck said, talking through a rock, "No, I can't talk right now. I'm trying to help recover a dead sloth." He stuck his knife in a tree. "They're following me. I know. They think I'm crazy." He looked over back at the herd. "Oh, we're going into the Chasm of Death. I'm gonna lose you." He shook his head and turned away. "Yeah, I love you, too. Okay, goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye." He threw the rock on the ground and grabbed his knife. "Okay, follow me."

"That'll be you two in three weeks," Shira said, walking away.

"If you didn't have mood swings, we would tell you off," Eddie said.

"Yeah, right. Like you would do that even if I wasn't having mood swings."

The herd kept walking until the reached a cavern that was filled with green gas. Everybody figured they were standing in front of the Chasm of Death.

"So why do they call it the Chasm of Death?" Eddie asked.

"Well, we tried calling it 'Big Smelly Crack', but that just made everybody giggle," Buck said.

"So now what?" Manny asked.

Buck answered his question by cutting a vine and bringing out a pulley system made of leaves and bones. He stepped up to Ellie and Shira. "Madames."

"She can go first," Shira said.

"Oh, how nice of you(!)" Ellie said sarcastically.

Shira rolled her eyes. "No problem(!)"

"Oh, what's rule number one?" Buck asked.

Crash thought about it a moment and raised his hand. "I know! I know!"

"Don't say it. So who will go first? The mammoth or the pregnant saber?"

"I'll go with my husband," Shira said.

Ellie sighed. "I'll go."

"Be careful, Ellie," Manny said.

"I will." Ellie climbed inside, hearing the creaking noise under her feet.

Buck got everything situated. "Now look forward...back straight...oh, and breath in the toxic fumes, you'll probably die."

"Toxic fumes?" Ellie asked.

"Just another day in paradise."

"Wait," Shira said, but Buck had already cut the vine.

Ellie held in her breath and Buck shouted, "Geronimo!" Out of sight they went. Everyone waited for a moment until the pulley system came back without Ellie or Buck.

"You okay, Ellie?" Manny shouted.

"You have to try this," Ellie shouted back.

"Okay, who's next?" Buck asked.

"I'll go next," Manny said. He climbed inside as Buck pulled him to the other side. He made it there safe and sound, standing right next to his wife.

Buck looked out at the other. "Okay, you four. Climb in. There should be plenty of room and hopefully carry your weight." They all climbed in the pulley and waited for Buck to get them to the other side. When they made it to the center of the chasm, the vine got stuck and the weight was slowing everything down. Buck chuckled nervously. "No worries. Just some technical difficulties. Keep holding it in, boys and preggers."

Shira and Diego did their best to keep their breath in. Crash and Eddie were having trouble keeping it in and they ended up not being able to hold their breath anymore. Eddie ended up letting it out first. " I can't take it anymore."

Crash gasped. "He's breathing it." He gasped again. "And now I'm breathing it." They started choking on the toxic air around them. Crash was surprised when he saw that he was still alive. "Hey, we're not dead." He said this in a high pitched voice as if he were inside a helium balloon.

Eddie noticed this and also added in a high pitched voice, "You sound ridiculous."

"Me? You should hear you." They both started laughing their heads off. Crash got his brother together in a huddle. "Okay, okay, and a one, and a two, and..." They both started singing. "Christmas, Christmas time is here!"

"Stop!" Shira exclaimed, keeping her breath held in, "Are you crazy?"

Diego actually breathed in the toxic fumes. "That's not poison." He said this in a high pitched voice as well. When he heard what he sounded like, he started laughing. His brothers laughed along with him.

Buck stood on the vine in the exit of the chasm. "Stop laughing! All of you!"

"Stop laughing! All of you!" Shira mocked in a high pitched voice. She stuck out her head. "What's rule number one?" She started laughing her head off as well as the others.

Buck sighed. Ellie walked over to the weasel. "They're just laughing. What's so bad about that?"

"They died laughing!" Buck said, horrified. He pointed down inside the chasm. Manny and Ellie gasped when they saw the remains of dinosaurs with laughter on their faces.

"Stop laughing!" Manny shouted.

"You know what's so funny?" Shira asked, "We're trying to save Brooke and it seems as though we might end up not making it out of here alive." Everyone laughed with her.

"You know, Brooke's not too bad once you understand her better," Diego said, laughing.

"She's a bad example of this herd. She doesn't deserve to be a part of this herd. I shouldn't have come down here in the first place. This was worthless. This whole herd is worthless. It might just be better if we all split apart." They were silent for a moment until they started laughing again.

Buck had no choice but to go out there himself to try and get them out of there. Crash and Eddie saw him and started tickling him. Buck snapped. "Hey, stop that!" He gasped, covering his hands over his mouth. He looked at all of them. "Don't you see? You're all gonna die!" His voice became high pitched, too. Everyone laughed again and so did Buck.

Meanwhile, the mammoths were staring, shaking their heads. Ellie sighed. "We gotta do everything around here, don't we?"

Manny shook his head. "I'll handle this." Manny pulled the vine on the tree and pulled hard, ripping the tree from its roots and taking it down. It caused the pulley system to ride down from the midst of the chasm.

The others were still laughing their heads off. Including Crash and Eddie. Eddie was making a confession. "Sometimes, I wet my bed."

"Dude, sometimes I wet your bed," Crash said.

They were all still laughing as they were knocked out of the Chasm of Death. By then their voices were returning to normal. Even Shira was still laughing, but the cubs were kicking her insides, tickling her. She looked up to see Ellie giving her a stern look. She knew the fun time was over.

"I'm not sure how much of that you could hear." Shira cleared her throat.

"Oh, we heard all of it," Ellie firmly replied.

Shira eventually came to terms that she kind of screw up with the herd and was about to start when Ellie has had enough and refuses to acknowledge the sabre and instead said, "No, I don't want to hear your excuses anymore, Shira; I just want to know why don't you want anything to do with us anymore Shira, after all we've being through!"

"Ellie..." Shira started.

"I'm not done," Ellie sternly interrupted, "Even since you became pregnant and I'm still bless that you two are going to be parents, you want nothing to do with us. We want to help you give you and your baby a happier life in this herd and you shun us away like we're buzzers to you."

"I don't need help, Ellie. I'm a strong sabre and sabres can manage on their own even in a pack," Shira pointed out.

"What about me? I maybe strong but I was raised and cared by possums and I didn't shun them away," Diego added to Shira.

"You're a different case, honey," Shira said.

"Shira, I know you're strong, but I don't want you to do this alone," Ellie softly said.

"I don't want you or anyone of your help," Shira refused.

"Why? What are you worried about? What are you so afraid of?" Ellie demanded.

"I'm not afraid! I'm just sick of this! I'm sick of being here! I'm sick of having to go through all of this drama with you and I'm sick of you and Brooke ruining my life!" Shira angrily yelled.

"Shira!" Diego exclaimed.

"What?!" Shira yelled at Diego.

"Calm down...Please" Diego begged.

Shira knew screaming wasn't going to help the situation or even do good for her baby until she calms down before she realised what she had said, but was too late to take it back.

"You think...Brooke and I ruined your life?" Ellie asked, feeling hurt.

"I didn't mean it like that, I just..." Shira tried to reason with Ellie.

"It's OK...I get it...I guess we'll be families on our own," Ellie softly nodded.

"Ellie?" Manny said in confusion

"Ellie," Shira started.

"When we find Brooke...we'll leave you and Diego if that is what will make you happy and for your sake...you better hope Brooke is still alive or I will never forgive you..." Ellie sadly concluded and walks away with Manny.

"Ellie, I didn't mean it like that! Ellie!" Shira cried out but it was too late.

"I know you didn't mean it, sweetie" Diego tried to comfort Shira.

"Do you, Diego? Are you saying that to make feel better?" Shira sadly sighed.

"I understand this is hard right now with the baby on the way and Brooke in danger but we will fix this together, I promise," Diego vowed.

Shira then nuzzles Diego who nuzzles back with a lick to her face who then said, "We better get going"

"Wait, aren't we forgetting something?" Shira asked.

Soon they heard high pitched laughter from behind the Chasm of Death as they could hear Buck swinging over to them, laughing out loud, "Here Rudy, Rudy! I'm so lonely!"

Eddie looked at his brother with a weird look. "You wet my bed?"

"That was gas talk, dude," Crash said. The whole herd walked away from the Chasm of Death.

At that moment, Scratte was chasing after Scrat, who had her but in his paws. They ran through the vines, laughing and giggling like crazy before chasing each other again. Everyone has had enough laughter for one day.


WELL, HERE IT IS. THE NEXT CHAPTER TO ICE AGE SWITCHEROO. THE THIRD ONE.

I WOULD LIKE TO THANK A.G. WICKED ONCE AGAIN FOR HELPING WITH THIS CHAPTER. HIS IDEA CAME UP AFTER THEY ALL FINALLY GOT OUT OF THE CHASM OF DEATH.

WELL, I BETTER GET GOING. LOTS TO DO AND LITTLE TIME TO DO IT. BYE UNTIL THE NEXT UPDATE.

PLEASE REVIEW.