A/N: I know, I know, I KNOW. I've been a bad writer. So sorry I haven't updated, but new job and other life stuff just made it impossible. But I'm back, and in addition to this I have the next two updates almost finished. So I promise it won't be so long a wait... It's Christmas, after all.
They both knew the danger that could be caused by an emotionally disturbed woman grieving such a terrible loss. Olivia didn't even want to know about "incident" the guard mentioned. She'd have to ask, but she had a feeling that it would only make things worse. Her mind was racing.
"Liv," Ed said again. He was worried that she was about to hyperventilate.
She didn't look at him or respond. She just sank to her knees and heaved a quiet sob.
"Liv, look at me." He repeated as he dropped to her level and put his hands on her shoulders. "We're going to find them."
Her mind heard his words, but they were lost in a jumble of fear and self-recrimination. This was not a good situation. She'd dealt with plenty of grieving parents in her career, and she knew how badly this could end.
"Madam," Officer Bernard interrupted. "I have notified my commander of the situation, officers are already on the way to her house. There is no reason to expect she will be…" he didn't want to over-promise since he didn't know the state of the potential kidnapper. "I am sure they will be fine."
"What about her car?" Ed asked. He didn't know if French procedure was the same as NYPD, but he wanted to know everything they were doing. He needed to know they were doing everything they could.
"Yes, her car. We also will have her picture to every metro stop, airport, bus station in the city," he said. "Do you have current pictures of your children? We want to put out an Alert Enlèvement, just in case."
Ed had pictures of the kids in his phone, but he was worried about leaving Liv's side to retrieve them. She flinched when the officer mentioned "Alert Enlèvement", the French version of an "Amber Alert". She only knew that because she'd attended an international trafficking forum a couple years ago.
Olivia was still silent, still on her knees. She'd sat back on her feet and dropped her head to her hands. She was mumbling something that none of the men could make out.
"Liv, I'm going to find a couple pictures of the kids for the police." He said. "But I'm not going anywhere."
He stood slowly. He kept one hand on her shoulder and with the other fished his phone from his pocket. He quickly found a couple pictures of the kids at the park the day before and texted them to the number Officer Bernard gave him.
The police and guards quickly jumped into action to get the photos out to the appropriate people. Ed immediately dropped down next to his wife. She was softly crying and still muttering something.
"Liv, it's going to be okay." He said, rubbing her back. "They're going to find them, and everything's going to be okay."
"You don't know that," she said turning her head just slightly. "You can't promise me that."
"I know it in my heart," Ed said, and he meant it. He had a strong feeling that it was going to be okay. "Of course, I can't promise, but we have to believe and hope for the best."
She shook her head. He dipped his head so he could see her face. "We need to just focus on working with these guys to find them."
"I know," she said again chastising herself, this time for falling apart. But she couldn't seem to shake the guilt.
"What is it?" he asked. "What aren't you saying?"
"This is all my fault," she said so quietly he wasn't sure he'd heard her correctly.
He looked around the room quickly. All of the police and guards had run off to carry out their various tasks. The only one left besides the two of them was the computer tech who'd shown them the videos. The tech caught Ed's eye and nodded toward the door, presumably indicating that's where Bernard went. Ed nodded back, silently asking the tech to leave and give him a minute alone with Olivia. The man complied and gave a sympathetic smile before whispering something in French.
As soon as they were alone, Ed put his hands under Olivia's elbows and pulled her to her feet. She didn't want to be comforted, but she was too upset to resist his embrace.
"It's my fault," she said again. "I should have had a better hold on them. I should have…"
"Stop it," Ed said. "This is not your fault. It was just an accident."
"If I'd been holding their hands," she continued, ignoring him. "I should have insisted on holding their hands." She kept berating herself, but her voice was getting so faint he couldn't even make out what she was saying.
"Olivia," he said more firmly. "I said stop it. Now."
She quit talking, but she refused to look at him. He didn't want to push her too hard, but they needed to keep it together until they found the kids. If she wanted to beat herself up with guilt, he could talk her out of it later, but right now he needed his badass Benson wife to show up and help him and the cops find their kids.
"I need you with me on this."
She sniffled and tried to take a more steady breath. He breathed with her, slow and deep trying to get her to calm herself even just a little.
"We need to be helping the police. We know what we've taught the kids. We know best how they might react."
She nodded continuing to avoid his eyes, but was feeling a bit more steady on her feet. He knew she was avoiding him. That she wasn't letting go of the misplaced guilt.
"I can't tell you how to feel, but I need you. The kids need you," he said.
She knew he was right. She'd spent her entire career putting her own feelings aside to deal with the facts of a case. Her breath caught in her throat at the thought of her kids as a case. It took everything in her not to automatically fear the worst.
"It's been just over an hour," Ed said as if reading her thoughts. "There is no indication that this woman means any harm. Noah and Nicole won't go just anywhere with a stranger. They know to call 112 in an emergency."
She finally looked at him. She wanted to see the reassurance in his eyes that he carried in his voice. It wasn't quite there, but he returned her gaze with resolve. She knew he'd go through hell or high-water to get their kids back. She knew she'd do the same. And because of that, she began to feel the hope he was trying to give her.
Ed was almost in awe as he watched the shift happen. The moment Olivia went from desperate to determined. The moment her hope was rekindled and her fear momentarily pushed aside. He'd seen her pull herself together during a tough case or a difficult interview with a victim, but to watch her steel herself against her motherly panic was painful.
"Okay?" Ed was hesitant. He didn't want to move too quickly and risk losing the ground they'd just gained, but they didn't have a lot of time. In a situation like this every minute counted and could be the difference between finding them or… He couldn't even complete the thought.
"Okay," she answered and took a deep breath. Her thoughts weren't much different from his, but she wasn't going to waste anymore time.
"Let's go find Bernard," he said ushering her toward the door of the security office. "I want to talk to his Captain."
"Noah," Nicole whispered as she knocked on the door where he'd been changing into dry clothes. She had made quick work of changing her shirt. She didn't want to be left alone in a stranger's house for any longer than necessary.
He called for her to come in, so she turned the knob. Noah had already gotten out of his wet clothes and had a t-shirt on.
"You okay," he said as he pulled a sweatshirt over his head, concern evident in his voice. As soon as he was situated he looked at her. He laughed a little.
The shirt she was wearing hung almost to her knees and the sleeves were bunched all the way up her arms. She frowned.
"I'm sorry, it just looks like you're wearing mom's clothes or something," he said. "But are you warmed up?"
"Yeah," she ignored his amusement. She was too nervous to care if he made fun of her.
He wasn't really trying to pick on her. He was trying to joke with her a little, so she'd forget how scared she was. Realizing it wasn't going to work, he switched gears.
"Okay, let's go call the police. Maybe Amelia knows how to call mom's phone, too."
Noah knew that there was something about his parents phones that didn't work while they were in France, but he didn't know if that meant they couldn't call them at all. He thought maybe he'd seen them send text messages. He and his sister knew both of their parents' phone numbers, and he kicked himself for just now thinking of that.
"You remember mom's phone number, right?" Noah asked as he started out of the bedroom.
"Yeah," she said with a nod.
"And 112," he said. "That's like 911 for France."
She nodded again.
"If anything happens, you find a phone or the police or another grown up, and you call 112 then call mom, okay?"
She stopped dead in her tracks before they got out of the room. "What's going to happen?"
"Nothing's going to happen," he said. "Just in case, I want to make sure you remember."
"Remember what?" Amelia said startling them by suddenly appearing in the door way.
"Our mom's phone number," Noah answered truthfully. He hoped his voice didn't sound like he was scared. Nicole scooted closer to him and grabbed the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He was starting to feel overwhelmed with the responsibility of taking care of them both.
"Oh, of course," Amelia said sweetly. "I made us some hot chocolate. Why don't we sit down and have some while we wait."
Something didn't seem right to the kids. Amelia was supposed to be taking them to the police not making hot cocoa.
"I think we should just go on to the police station," Noah said pulling Nicole's hand into his and taking a step toward the door.
The woman didn't move to let them pass. "I already called the police. They'll be here any minute."
Noah didn't know if he trusted this woman anymore. Something about her voice had changed since they got to the apartment.
"I think I should call the police and talk to them. I can give them my mom's phone number." He tried to sound like his dad when he was laying down the law. Steady voice, no anger, no fear. He was scared that he was failing.
"How about you wait right here, and I'll go get the drinks and the phone?" Amelia said as she started backing out of the room with her hand on the doorknob.
Noah stepped forward pulling Nicole along with him. Before they could get to the door, Amelia quickly moved into the hallway and pulled the door closed. Noah quickly reached for the handle, but he heard a click just as he grabbed the knob.
Captain Roussel ushered Ed and Olivia into his office. It had taken some convincing to get Olivia to leave the train station, but all evidence pointed to the kids having left. Officer Bernard had made the convincing argument by pointing out that they'd have access to many more resources at the police station.
Roussel offered the couple coffee but was turned down. He motioned for another officer to bring some coffee anyway. Ed started peppering the Captain with questions. Olivia had her arms crossed over her chest but stood so she was touching Ed's shoulder almost leaning on him.
"Please, sit," the Captain said and motioned toward a worn leather couch to their left.
Olivia stiffened. She didn't want to sit in another police captain's office and discuss her missing children. Ed put an arm around her shoulders and with a light squeeze encouraged her to comply. They weren't in the U.S. There wasn't anyone they could call to pull rank. They needed to play nice.
She took a sharp breath and followed Ed's lead. When Roussel started rehashing the facts they knew so far, it took everything in her not to rush to the bin in the corner and throw up. Her babies were with a strange, possibly emotionally disturbed woman in a foreign country. She could feel herself starting to hyperventilate again.
Ed felt his wife start to tremble and shot a glance at her. She was breathing through pursed lips. It was a method she'd learned after Lewis to cope with sudden anxiety attacks. He could tell she was struggling to regulate.
While the French Captain continued to tell them about French procedure and protocol, Ed listened. He tightened his grip on Liv's shoulders and once again encouraged her to breathe with him. Deep breaths. Together.
Olivia fought to focus on the Captain's words, and she felt the panic start to subside. Ed gave her another squeeze. She blew out a breath, pushed her shoulders back and lifted her head to join the conversation.
The trio starting discussing next steps. It was so hard for two trained NYPD cops to just sit in a police station and wait. It went against everything instinct they had as cops, as parents.
"Noah?" Nicole said, her bottom lip starting to quiver. "What's happening? Why did she lock us in here"
"I don't know," he said honestly. The apartment had old fashioned doors with key locks. Amelia must have had a key with her. Noah didn't understand how she'd tricked them, but it hadn't even occurred to him that she would do this.
Nicole was starting to cry. Noah wanted to cry with her, but he had to be the big brother and get them away from this woman. He started looking around the room. There wasn't a phone or a computer. Then he saw the window and the fire escape outside.
"Come on," he said and pulled Nicole with him over to the window. He didn't know how long Amelia would be gone. He tried to push the window up, but it wouldn't budge.
Noah ran his fingers along the sides and bottom of the window looking for a latch. He found nothing. He wasn't tall enough to see if there was a lock at the top.
"Get me that chair," he told Nicole. She was reluctant to leave his side.
"Now, Nicole," he said harshly. "We don't have much time."
Tears were still running down her cheeks, but she did what her brother told her to do. Seconds later she rolled the desk chair to the window and tried to hold it still while he climbed on.
"Got it," he said with relief as he found the latch and unlocked it. He hopped off the chair and easily pushed the window open. It was a little heavy and wouldn't stay open on its own.
"Where are we going to go?" Nicole said as Noah looked for something to prop the window.
"I don't know, but we need to get out of here and away from this lady," he answered. He raised an eyebrow when he spotted a pair of ice skates. Maybe the blade would be strong enough to hold the window open.
Within a few minutes, Nicole was shivering on the fire escape waiting for Noah to climb out. The ice skate worked to hold the window open, and it had been easy enough for little Nicole to squeeze through, but Noah was having a hard time getting through the small space.
He'd hoisted himself halfway out but had no leverage because the space was small. He was about to drop back into the room and try a different approach when he heard the key in the lock of the door.
Back at the police station, Olivia felt a sudden sense of panic again. She tightened her grip on Ed's hand.
"You okay?"
She just looked at him.
"I know," he said. "I wish there was more we could do, too."
"I just," she began but trailed off.
"What is it?" He asked.
"Something feels wrong."
"You think the police are hiding something?" He said and squared his shoulders as if preparing to act.
"No, it's not that." She said with a shake of her head.
"Then what?"
"I don't know."
He pulled her closer to him and put his free hand on her knee. She grabbed his hand and held it so tight he almost asked her to ease up. Instead he just rubbed the side of her wrist with his thumb and prayed that her intuition was wrong.
"Down the stairs, Nicole, and hold on," Noah ordered. She shot him a look of protest. "Just go. I'm right behind you."
She reluctantly started down the first flight of the fire escape. Noah gave one last shove against the ledge and fell into a heap onto the cold, wet landing.
"No!" Shouted Amelia as she rushed to the window. "Where do you think you're going?"
Noah grabbed the window with one hand and shoved the ice skate back into the room with the other. Then he let the heavy window slam shut.
He jumped when Amelia's hand pounded against the now closed window. "Don't leave me again."
He saw Nicole was almost to the next landing and he jumped up and rushed after her. "Keep going, Nic!"
He quickly caught up to her. When they got to the last landing he realized there was a bit of a drop to the ground. It wasn't far for him, but it would be too much for Nicole.
"Let me go first," he instructed as he moved to climb down the more ladder-like rungs of the final few steps.
"I'm scared," she whimpered.
"I know," he said quickly. "But it's okay. I'll get down, and then I'll help you."
Noah struggled a little with the last few rungs because he had no where to put his feet. It took all of his strength to lower himself the short distance with just his arms, but his feet finally touched the ground.
"Come on, Nic." He encouraged immediately.
She didn't hesitate and started down the rungs. When her feet hit the last one she didn't know what to do. Noah gave her instructions and she was soon dropping down to the ground in his grasp.
"There's a church just at the end of the block. They can help," he said pointing ahead and started to turn his sister in the right direction.
Nicole didn't budge. "Come on," he said again. Then he looked down and saw that she was looking behind him. Dread filled Noah when he heard his sister scream. Then he felt Amelia's hand wrap around his arm.
"Run!" Noah yelled as he threw himself backwards knocking the woman to the ground. Unfortunately, he was dragged down, too, because the grip on his arm never let up.
Nicole stood frozen for a minute watching as her brother and the woman struggled. She didn't want to run away. She didn't want to be alone. She didn't want to leave Noah with this woman.
"Nicole!" Noah shouted at her. "Run to the church. You have to get away. It's our only chance."
He was just saying anything he could think to get her to get away. He didn't want to be separated from her, but if she could just make it to the end of the block to the church maybe someone would help her. He wasn't even thinking about himself at this exact moment. But he thought that Nicole getting away was the best chance for both of them.
Nicole was crying hard. She didn't know what to do. Amelia had a hold of Noah and was starting to drag them both to stand. Noah panicked. The time for one of them to get away was running out.
"I'll be okay. GO!"
Nicole saw the church. It wasn't far. Maybe she could get there. She started walking but kept looking back at Noah. She didn't want to leave, but he was yelling at her to run.
Amelia was back on her feet and started dragging Noah toward Nicole. He grabbed her hand with his and pulled her in the opposite direction giving Nicole one last command to run. HIs sister finally listened and took off running.
"Why did you try to run away?" Amelia cried. She started trying to pull Noah back toward the entrance to the apartment building. He resisted. The woman was hysterical, and he thought he might be able to get away from her, too.
He twisted and squirmed trying to wrench himself from her grip. She yanked his arm hard. The sudden action and the slippery sidewalk caused him to fall.
Noah wasn't prepared when his feet suddenly flew out from under him. Just before the back of his head smacked the concrete, he saw the blurry from of Nicole running up the steps of the church at the end of the block. That was the last thing he saw before his world went black.
