Once

Once

A.N. Thanks to all my reviewers!! You guys are so amazing!!

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The Gryffindor common room was for once deserted, and as Brooke climbed her way through the large portrait hole, she couldn't be happier.

She was exhausted.

No more late night study sessions with Hermione.

When she had agreed to study with the bushy hair Gryffindor, she never believed they would be up past four in the morning. Brooke had fallen asleep the second her head hit her pillow, only to be awakened 3 hours later to begin the week of finals before Christmas break.

As she pulled herself up the stairs to the dormitory, she was for once grateful for the quiet. No small talk or rapid fire questions. Just quiet, and the safety of her own bed.

Her bad was quickly tossed to the floor, robe flying over the window seat, and she spun on her heel until she fell backwards onto the bed. She sighed, stretching her arms high over her head before letting them drop to her pillow.

Which felt satiny smooth.

A familiar scent teased her nostrils, and Brooke pushed herself up onto her elbows, craning her neck to peer at her coverlet.

None of the golden sheets could he seen beneath the sea of red silk. Roses, she thought, smiling. Cedric.

At least a hundred roses covered every square inch of her bed, their red silk petals brushing against her skin as she moved. A quiet laugh escaped her lips as her fingers reached for the note on her pillow.

Dearest Brooke—

I called on the house elves for a favor. There's a rose for every moment I thought of you this morning. By Christmas, I'll be able to deliver them to you personally. Their beauty pales in comparison to yours.

Yours, now and always,

Cedric

Brooke's fingertips traced across his neat penmanship, smile widening at his signature.

Soon, he would be her Cedric. All hers.

A thought suddenly crossed her mind, and she reached for the quill and parchment at her bedside. She flung herself down into the sea of roses, giggling softly as she inhaled their sweet aroma. HER Cedric…

She sighed happily as she penned the letter to her brother, finally telling of the boy that had captured her heart.

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The Owlery was at the top of one of Hogwarts' tallest towers. Brooke's legs protested as she climbed the many stairs, but she trudged on, the letter to Aidan in her hand.

She was smiling.

She wanted to get it sent right away, even now anticipating his response.

She'd asked his permission to invite Cedric for Christmas. His parents, as well, of course. If she could keep the fact that she and Cedric were more intimate than she had led on a secret, things would go much easier for everyone.

Her smile widened as she imagined Christmas with Cedric. Aidan would love him—after playing the overprotective big brother card, of course. They'd stay up late Christmas Eve watching It's a Wonderful Life. They'd wake up early Christmas morning and open presents, and everyone would laugh at the gag gifts she and Aidan exchanged every year. Though it didn't snow in Las Vegas, they'd still frolic together outside before heading in for Christmas dinner, where it would be painstakingly obvious to their families that they truly loved each other, and they'd offer their congratulations.

Brooke skipped to the top of the stairs. She practically twirled around, giddy as she was with her imaginings, before turning the corner—

And coming face to face with Cho Chang.

The breath left Brooke's chest as she met the gaze she had been avoiding guiltily for the past month. The girl's face smiled in kindness, and the guilt hit Brooke harder.

"Hello, Brooke," Cho said, her voice thick with her Scottish accent.

Brooke forced an uncomfortable smile. "Hey, Cho," she said, trying to calm her racing pulse. Please don't let her see she begged. "Sending a letter home?"

Cho smiled and shook her head, long black hair falling over her shoulder. "No…I come up here to think now and then."

Brooke nodded, still deeply uncomfortable. "Yeah. Well…I won't keep you."

She went to step around her, but the Ravenclaw held out a hand to stop her.

"Wait, please," she said. Brooke stopped. "Would you mind…I mean, could I ask you something?"

Brooke hesitated. "Sure…"

Cho shuffled her feet slightly as she crossed her arms over her chest. "You know Cedric, right? Cedric Diggory?"

Panic gripped Brooke's heart, and she felt the color slowly drain from her face. No, she can't know—we've been so careful! She nodded, unsure of herself to speak.

"Do you like him?"

Brooke's heart raced in panic. "Y-yes. Sure," she said, willing her voice not to shake. "Why?"

Cho's smile suddenly fell, and she shrugged. "I'm just trying to make sense of my feelings for him. We've been together for almost six months, and I'm starting to think there's more to my feelings than just like."

Brooke frowned. "You mean love?"

Cho laughed, and Brooke's stomach sank. That's the way she laughed around Cedric.

"I don't know…maybe. I mean, we fight all the time, but the truth is, I've never had more fun. I love just being with him…I'm starting to think that maybe I do…love him." A look of worry suddenly crossed her flawless face. "But lately I've felt like he's pulling away from me. Like it's going to be over any moment, and he's just waiting for the best way to tell me so." Her dark eyes watered as she spoke, and Brooke could see the insecurity in them. "Maybe he thinks I don't feel as strongly for him as he does for me? Do you think if I told him, it'd make things better?"

Brooke stared at the girl, heart breaking and mind racing. She wanted to scream at her, not it won't. he doesn't love you—just let him go. Let him be happy.

But her upbringing held her back, and suddenly all of Aidan's advice came screaming back at her. Don't deceive. Don't lie. Don't cheat.

Her heart sank when she realized she'd done all three. Aidan would be ashamed.

While she had been deliriously happy the past month, Cho had been miserable, her heart breaking at the thought that she was losing Cedric.

She'd made herself believe it was better for Cedric to continue the charade with Cho. To keep up appearances so the transition would be easier.

Now she realized she'd just been telling herself these things to make herself feel better.

Staring at Cho Chang now, Brooke realized that what she had told Cedric a month ago was true: Everyone gets hurt.

She forced a smile to her face. "Maybe," she whispered. "I guess you just have to follow your heart." Her own was breaking.

Cho smiled, sighing in relief. "Good…I just wanted to hear someone else say it." She regarded Brooke with a sincere gaze. "Thank you, Brooke…I've always known you'd be a good friend." She waved in farewell and quickly stepped around her to head down the stairwell.

Brooke's face crumbled the moment she left, no longer able to fight the tears. Cho's words felt like a knife to her already broken heart.

She sobbed brokenly for a long moment, her skin numb to the chilly air.

Finally, she pulled herself together. She ran her gloved fingers over her wet cheeks.

She knew what she had to do, and her heart broke with the reality of it. She folded the letter to Aidan in half, stuffing it in her back pocket, before making her way downstairs.

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Brooke trekked her way down the familiar path to the Quidditch field, hearbeat echoing louder in her ears with every step she took. Could she do this?

She pushed her way inside the stadium that was reserved for the Hufflepuffs. Cedric had set up one last secret night meeting "before it's for real." He'd said it with the most beautiful smile…She'd almost convinced herself to let things continue on the way they were.

But then she thought of Cho's hope-filled face that morning, and she knew that she could never live with breaking that expression. She knew she had to follow through with her plan.

Fighting against the tears that threatened to fill her eyes, she made her way inside.

Cedric leaned against his desk, a smile playing across his perfect lips, and Brooke's heart froze in her chest.

Two candles burned on the cloth covered desk, a bowl of cherries—her favorite—wedged between two goblets of butterbeer. Brooke shook her head as she walked slowly towards him, twisting the ring on her finger. "You shouldn't have done this, Cedric," she whispered brokenly.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "It wasn't any trouble," he said, taking her hand and pulling her closer.

"Cedric, wait," she said when he leaned his head towards hers. If he kissed her, she'd never be able to do this. He looked at her questioningly. "I have to talk to you about something." She looked at him, trying to calm herself.

Cedric frowned. "Brooke, you can talk to me about anything. What's wrong?"

She pulled her hand from his grasp, and clutched it to her chest, turning from his gaze. Maybe if she held her chest tight enough, she could keep her heart from breaking. She kept her back turned as she took a deep breath. "I can't do this anymore," she whispered.

Cedric was quiet only for a moment. "We won't have to much longer," he said.

Brooke closed her eyes at his voice, and opened them as she turned to him. "No," she said. "I can't do THIS anymore."

She watched his face as he took in her meaning, and her tears threatened to come forth at his expression.

"What do you mean?" he asked slowly, voice tinged with confused worry.

Brooke fought back her tears as she looked at him. "We've been fooling ourselves, Cedric," she said softly, willing her voice to stay steady. "Thinking that this was okay; that it was going to work…It's not. On both accounts, it's not. It's just…a waste of time."

Her lie hit Cedric hard, and her lips trembled as his face became pained. He took a step towards her. "Brooke, if this is about Cho—."

"It's not," she cut in. "This is about me…I'm just realizing that this can't work." She forced a smile as she shrugged. "You have to admit that it was doomed from the start, you know? No relationship can last on deception."

Cedric took two long strides towards her, never breaking eye contact.

"You don't mean this, Brooke," he said brokenly—almost desperately. "I know you—I know what you're doing." He grabbed her shoulders. "You're doing this for Cho—you're hurting yourself so you won't hurt her. You and your ridiculous compassion."

The tears slipped from her eyes now as Brooke shook her head. "I'm not, Cedric. I just…I can't lie to myself anymore." She drew a shaky breath. Please forgive me, Ced. "I can't tell myself that I feel something for you when I really don't."

Cedric dropped his hands as if she had burned him, pain flashing across his face. His mouth hung open in shock, face drained of color. He stared at her brokenly, and Brooke prayed that her legs would not buckle beneath her. Cedric's face slowly relaxed slightly, and he shook his head. "You don't…I don't believe you," he struggled. "You're lying, Brooke."

"I'm not," she rasped out.

He gripped her chin, jerking it up, forcing her to meet his eyes. "Fine, then tell me. I need to hear you say it. Look into my eyes and tell me you don't love me the way I love you."

Brooke stared at his pleading eyes, and felt her strength waver. She wanted to cry, to tell him yes. That she loved him more than anything in the world, and that she wanted nothing more than to be by his side for the rest of her life. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and lose herself in his kiss.

But she forced her thoughts away, choking down the sob in her throat. "I don't love you," she said strongly, staring directly into his eyes.

Cedric stepped back from her, his whole body radiating pain. He said nothing, just stared at her, eyes searching her face. He obviously didn't find what he wanted. He turned his back to her, bracing his hands against the desk.

Brooke stared at him, heartbroken. Her lips parted in a silent sob as the tears spilled down her cheeks. "I'm sorry, Cedric," she whispered. His hands clenched the edge of the desk, shoulders shaking in anger. "Bye," she said. She clutched a hand to her mouth before her sob could be heard and turned, running from the room. She heard a loud crash behind her, and she knew Cedric's romantic gesture now laid strewn about the room.

She didn't look back and she didn't stop running. She ran through the courtyard, up the brick path, all the way to the school. She felt her legs start to buckle, and she grasped onto the pillar next to her, sliding down to her knees as the sobs finally overtook her. Her body wracked with the sheer force of them, and she didn't care that they echoed brokenly against the stone walls.

She needed to hear them. She needed to hear the weight of what she had done. She needed to hear her heart breaking. She needed to hear it, so she would never make the same mistake again.

She would never fall in love again.

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….please don't kill me…it had to happen!! You don't understand now, but you will soon!! Or will you….??