Chapter Seven Take it All
Artie was blissfully sound asleep having found just the right spot in the bed. So soundly in fact, that he was already dreaming. Which would explain why he called out 'Oh Vanessa!' when he first felt what he thought was her touch. Boy, doctors really do know just where to touch you.
If Karen had been listening or paying attention on any level, she might have already gotten a clue. But she was boldly going where no IRS agent had gone before and as she did with Helena, she was forging ahead. This is why it took her all the way up to Artie's beard to figure out that she wasn't in bed with Pete.
The rest of the household simultaneously woke up to screeching, yelling and noise that made each of them grab for their weapons. Except HG who instinctively grabbed for Myka. Waking up in the pitch dark to loud noises was still an issue for Helena. Myka grabbed for her gun in her left hand without ever taking her right arm from around HG. She made a mental note of how HG seemed to be shaking.
"It's OK, Helena," was all Myka said softly while at the same time training her ear on the hallway and aiming her gun at the door.
Myka only let go when Helena moved to get up. The two agents stood in the doorway and watched a scantily clad Karen running into HG's room yelling, "Oh my gawd, oh my gawd!" Myka wanted to withdraw back into her room to save Pete the embarrassment. But instead, they heard Pete's voice coming from the other end of the hallway.
"Karen? What's wrong? Oh geez, I fell asleep," he said as he went to HG's bedroom door.
"Well if Mr. Lattimer was there…," Helena said slowly looking at the guest bedroom.
"Then who is in there?" Myka finished her thought looking at the Pete's room.
The two women jumped when Artie came out of Pete's room standing there in red plaid pajamas and trying to get his glasses on his head.
"What the …. Who the …. ?" Artie was saying and both Myka and Helena tried to pull back into the room but now Artie was in front of them.
"Did you see….?" he asked and neither of them said anything. Myka bit her lip really hard and Helena looked around anywhere but Artie's eyes.
"Apparently, there was a misunderstanding ….," Artie was saying but Myka was so afraid he would try to explain it. It was hard enough for her to see her boss in his pajamas although Helena would point out later, it could have been worse. Much worse.
Helena retreated first and Myka slowly backed into the room, telling Artie …"Let's all go back to sleep." She wanted to add – 'and erase this from our memories.'
"I dare say Agent Carson will be leaving tomorrow now for certain," Helena whispered in a sing song voice to Myka when they got back in bed.
"I think I'm going to be sick," Myka said unable to process all that had just happened. "Poor Pete," she said thinking of her partner. Now it was HG who put her arm around Myka who had trouble getting the image of a disheveled Artie out of her mind.
"This is one mess I will rather enjoy watching Mrs. Frederic clean up," Helena said out loud.
"Oh, Helena – what are we going to do tomorrow morning at breakfast? I mean, how are we going to face Artie?" Myka worried.
"Myka darling, we've done nothing wrong. We are not the ones who should be worried about the dawn breaking. I dare say, except for Leena and Claudia, we are the only ones who should be looking forward to tomorrow's events," HG said thinking of how easy it was going to be to get rid of Karen now.
Pete had knocked on HG's door and entered even before Karen said come in. He was so annoyed at himself for falling asleep. He had just put his head down, waiting for some time to pass for Artie to fall asleep but he went unconscious. The next thing he knew, he was waking up to screeching and Artie yelling. He honestly thought, 'what did HG do now?' when he heard Artie's voice but couldn't place the screeching sound. Even he knew the Brit would never shriek. Cruse maybe, yell even - but never shriek.
"Karen, I am so sorry. I fell asleep," Pete said as he held onto her shoulders.
"Oh Pete, I am so embarrassed. I thought it was you," she started.
"OK, well sure it's my bedroom, right? So, you went in and saw that it wasn't me?" Pete said hopefully.
"The lights were out," she said.
"So you called my name?" Pete asked slowly starting to feel his flesh crawl.
"Pete, I grabbed him….there!" Karen blurted out - loudly.
"Oh-my-God," Myka moaned and buried her head under the pillow when she overhead that loud confession coming from the other side of the wall. But Helena found the whole thing very funny and burst into laughter. Myka pulled her down so they wouldn't overhear her.
"Helena! Please don't make this any worse than it is," Myka pleaded.
"Myka, where do you think she grabbed...…," but Myka didn't let the Brit finish her question.
She pushed the pillow over her mouth and pulled her down further into the bed. This made Helena laugh even more and now she was hysterical. The more Myka tried to keep her quiet, the harder it was for HG to control herself. When she finally stopped laughing, Myka let her go.
"Behave Helena," Myka said feeling embarrassed by the whole thing.
"Was it his foot?" Helena said and started to laugh all over again.
"You are incorrigible!" Myka said but had to laugh at how funny Helena found all of this.
"Is that Helena?" Karen asked when she heard the muffled sounds through the wall.
'Yeah, I'm not gonna hear the end of this,' Pete thought. "Well the screaming did wake everyone up," Pete said.
"Oh, this is so embarrassing, Pete. I feel terrible," Karen said and sunk into his chest. It was only then did he realize she was wearing so little red.
"Wow, were you wearing this when you…?" Pete asked absentmindedly. As if she had time to change?
Karen was too upset to answer. She didn't want to talk about it anymore. She wanted to forget all about it. And she knew the perfect thing to take her mind off of it. She reached up and grabbed Pete and kissed him almost as hard as she had Helena. She suddenly was glad to know that the walls were so thin between the rooms. If she couldn't have Helena G. Wells yet, she would make sure she would hear just what she was missing.
What Karen didn't realize was that nothing could distract Helena just then. She was nestled next to her partner, having exhausted herself from laughing and the late hour. She was blissfully unaware of any goings on in her room. Which was a good thing or she might have ordered them both out of her bed.
Claudia had heard the noise but as soon as she saw Karen running from the room, she started to close the door. Then she heard Artie's voice and saw Pete at the other end of the hallway. She closed her door completely, jumped back into her bed and pulled the covers all the way up. She put in her ear buds from her IPod and blasted Coldplay in her ears. She remained in that fetal position all night. Thankfully, Leena was a sound sleeper and was joyfully spared the commotion. Although the auras the next morning would confuse the hell out of her.
Artie collapsed back on the bed. He was in the biggest shock of all. He had just found the right spot and had fallen asleep. He had done his deep breathing exercises that Vanessa had shown him to relax before drifting off. He was thinking of how he hadn't seen Vanessa in some time and perhaps she would visit soon. These are the thoughts that floated around in his consciousness as he listened to the rain on the windows. A short time later, he started to dream that Vanessa did show up at the B&B. She had stopped by to see him and told him she had to drive through that storm because she just couldn't keep her mind on anything else. He expressed his delight and told her he often spent hours at the Warehouse thinking about her. That's when she lunged towards him right in the hallway, with the agents all upstairs and kissed him on the lips …. And apparently manhandled him… because that is what he felt. But even in his dream state, he was shocked at how aggressive the good Doctor was. After grabbing him, she moved her hands slowly up his body until she caressed his face. Then the screaming started. He was so startled – his dream turning into a nightmare. It didn't sound anything like Vanessa and yet it was right in his ear. He grabbed the person and opened his eyes but it was pitch black. He could tell that the woman was smaller than Vanessa and thought for a second it might be an animal because the screech was so high. Still caught between being asleep and awake, the only thing Artie could think of was to silence her. But she broke from his grasp and ran. He got up on the other side of the bed and ran out to the hallway. All he saw was the sight of a sparsely dressed woman running into HG's room. Then he saw Myka and HG - and the expressions on their faces said it all. Next he saw Pete rush from the guest room to HG's room and it came back to him.
But it was the look on Myka's face that upset him the most. He wanted to profess his innocence in all of this but when he looked at Myka, he couldn't form sentences. What was that on her face? Embarrassment? Shock? Disapproval? It was dark but even in the dim light of the hallway, he could see how uncomfortable Myka was. He retreated to Pete's room and lay down but never did fall back to sleep. He lay there listening to the rain beat down against the windows.
Artie was the only one already awake when the blasted alarm clock went off at four AM. Helena heard it and then the smashing sound of someone trying to hit it and knocking it off the night table. Myka moaned next to her and she coaxed her to return to sleep. HG felt sorry for Pete but couldn't get the smile off her face when she thought about her assistant waking up to that noise. She drifted back to sleep too and missed the second round of lovemaking going on in her room.
Helena woke up two hours later happy to find that she was still right next to Myka. She could hear water running in her shower and then realized she would eventually have to go back into that room to get her clothes. 'Maybe they can just seal it up,' she thought to herself. When she heard more doors open, she nudged Myka softly to wake up. Helena was a bit anxious for breakfast but as soon as Myka opened her eyes, she wanted nothing to do with getting up.
"We really should get dressed, Myka. We can't stay up here forever," HG said to her.
"No, I think we can. And today is the perfect time to do it," Myka said unable to let go of her pillow.
Helena had trouble understanding Myka's dilemma. For HG, it was a perfect scenario. Artie would be reticent at the meeting this morning. Pete would more than likely be in a great mood. And she could sit back and watch Mrs. Frederic fire Karen. Then she would be left to act surprised and wish her all the best of luck in her future endeavors as she helped her pack.
"Myka, can you go into my room to get my clothes?" HG asked when Myka got up.
"You don't want to go into your own room?" Myka asked.
"Well, actually I don't think I ever want to go back into my room now that you mention it," HG said out loud. "But I do not wish to run into Agent Carson. It might prove awkward for the young woman."
"And it won't be awkward if it's me?" Myka asked not wanting to go in there either.
"Well, you're not her boss. She might be less embarrassed with you," HG suggested. Myka didn't agree but she did know HG needed her clothes.
Myka got up and dressed and then tiptoed over to HG's door and knocked. When Claudia called out to her from her doorway, Myka jumped and clutched her heart.
"Myka!" Claudia whispered loudly.
"Geez, Claud – your scared me half to death!" Myka said.
"After last night, you're lucky you weren't turned into a pillar of salt dude," Claudia said.
"Just stop," Myka said because she did not want to discuss it. "Where is everyone?"
"Well, let's see. Agent Red Lace and Pete are downstairs and Tiger is still in his room," Claudia reported, ironically calling him the same name as Karen.
"Help me get HG's clothes," Myka said mostly because she didn't want to be alone in case Artie came out.
"You're getting her clothes? And Karen is pouring her tea? Some life HG's got since she came into money," Claudia mused.
"Stop and help me," Myka said because there was no time for fooling.
Claudia joined Myka in the Brit's room and quickly grabbed some clothes she could change into. Myka noticed that some of the desk drawers were ajar. Helena never left her desk drawers opened. Myka got a weird feeling about that. But she didn't want to run into Artie so she hurried and went back into her room with Claudia.
"Here you go, your Highness," Claudia said. "Straight from the den of iniquity."
"That's not funny!" Helena said as she took her clothes and went into Myka's bathroom to change.
"What do we do now? All march down together?" Claudia asked Myka who was still biting her lip when she thought about it.
"I don't know. I guess we could. I mean – we should just act like everything is ok, right?" Myka asked hoping that was right.
"Yeah," Claudia said because she shared Myka's discomfort about all of this. Seeing Artie in his pajamas would have been bad enough but seeing Karen running from his room was akin to walking in on your parents doing it.
"OK, Ladies! Shall we go to breakfast? I'm famished," HG said in contrast to her friends.
Myka knew she couldn't stay upstairs all day and she didn't want to be left behind so when Helena and Claudia started to make their way downstairs, she followed. Actually, she rushed ahead to be in between them – just in case Artie came out of Pete's room.
"Good morning," HG said to Pete and Karen who were sitting with Leena at the table.
"Good morning, Helena. I trust you slept well?" Karen said and HG noticed there wasn't an ounce of hesitation in her voice.
"Yes, and you?" HG shot back.
"Not so much," Karen countered and smiled at Pete who only slightly blushed at the admission.
"Hey guys," he said to include Myka and Claudia.
"Hey," Claudia said and sat down and grabbed a bagel to shove in her mouth so no further talking would be necessary.
"Good morning," Myka said and poured coffee and took it so quickly that she burned her lip.
"Is Mrs. Frederic here yet?" Helena asked Leena because she was certain the Sage would be there.
"Oh I doubt she'll make it here this morning," Leena said. "The roads are in bad shape from here to the Interstate."
"I doubt washed out roads will keep her from coming today," HG said to no one in particular.
"Helena, if you have a few minutes, could I speak to you in private?" Karen asked and HG was out of her seat. 'She wants to quit in dignity. Good for her,' HG thought.
"Of course, Agent Carson. It would be my pleasure," the Brit said sincerely.
Helena walked with a sprint in her step because this was going to be wonderful. 'How should I react when she says she can't stay? Should I act surprised? Regretful? Collapse with grief?' were just some of the thoughts that floated in the Brit's head and confirmed that, indeed, she had a great sense of humor. Karen noticed the smile; no it was more of a smirk on Helena's face. 'Surely she does not think I am embarrassed by last night's events?' the young woman thought. Helena led her into the office off of the main hallway. It would afford them the privacy Karen asked for and HG would still hear when Mrs. Frederic arrived through the front door.
"Helena, I have really enjoyed working with you since yesterday," Karen started. "I admire what you're trying to do with your money," she added and HG smiled. "But it has occurred to me that your desire to help people could be a full time job and as you know, I have a job already."
"Well, I understand…," HG said but Karen cut her off.
"No, Helena I'm pretty sure you don't," Karen said and HG detected a change in her tone.
"I understand that you can't do both jobs and want to leave. I thank you for what little service you provided," Helena said because now she was losing patience. 'Just quit already!' she thought.
"Helena, you and I are going to continue to work together," the younger woman smiled sinisterly.
"Pardon me?" HG asked perplexed.
"I have decided that, for now I should return to the main office but I can still help you out," Karen said plainly.
"No, I do believe that I will require someone who can devote more time ..," HG started but again the girl cut her off.
"You won't need anyone to handle that, Helena because you're going to send the money to me," Karen said.
"And how will you distribute it from there?" HG asked trying to point out the fault with her plan.
"The only person I am going to distribute the proceeds to is - myself," Karen said as if it were a fool proof plan.
"Are you insane, woman?" HG said getting up from her seat. "Why would I do that?"
"Because Agent Wells, I have discovered that you are a very wealthy woman and I intend to make that work for me," the blonde said so calmly that HG was waiting for the joke.
"Are you attempting in your feeble state of mind to extract monetary compensation from me without any merit or grounds? You are insane," HG said.
"Is that smart talk for blackmail? Yes, now sit down," Karen said boldly.
"Madam, I am going to say this once. I will crush you! I will allow you your delusional plot to extort and still live if you take your belongings out of my room and leave right now. If you insist on staying, I will personally see to it that your life is a living hell. You don't know me, Agent Carson. I am quite capable of doing just that before I finish my tea," Helena fumed.
"Oh but I do know you, Helena. Let me explain what I know," Karen said and Helena stood there. Most people would at the very least have become rattled from her threats but this woman was impervious.
"Here are some of my choices that I considered, Helena," the agent said. "I rip my clothes right now, pull you down on me and scream. Your friends rush in and see you on top of me. I've already told Pete that you approached me yesterday…," she started but HG started towards her. She pulled out her gun. "Sit down Helena. I'm not going to do that," Karen said keeping a distance between them.
"You're pulling a gun on me in my own home?" HG said incredulously.
"I'm always prepared," was the response. "Anyway, that story might work but it would really put a damper on our relationship. And Helena," the woman said leaning closer to HG, "I do want us to have a relationship."
"You are crazy," HG said thinking if she could get closer to her, she would disarm her and break her arm!
"But then, Helena I found a more sure fire way to get your cooperation. Now I want you to listen to me very carefully because I'm only going to say this once," Karen said holding the gun on HG.
"I know your weakness, Helena G. Wells and that is why you're going to cooperate," Karen said with confidence.
"You have been with me twenty four hours and you know my weakness?" HG all but laughed.
"You're not as smart as you think you are, Helena," Karen said getting annoyed that Helena was not taking her seriously.
"Oh I highly doubt that madam. In fact, that is the most insane thing you have said!" HG protested.
"Sit down for this part, Helena please," Karen said waving the gun to do so. Helena sat back down on the couch trying to formulate her plan.
"Your weakness is Myka Bering," Karen said smugly with the couch between them. "Ah ah ah, " she warned Helena when she sprung from the couch.
"If you even touch one hair on her head, I promise you….," HG started but it only made Karen smile more.
"Thank you for confirming that for me, Helena. How sweet," the younger woman said and now HG was losing it.
"Listen, I wouldn't hurt Myka. I'm a sworn agent of the United States. But I am an IRS agent, Helena and making people's lives a living hell is what I do for a living," Karen said trying not to trip over her words.
"So you're threatening to audit Myka? Oh, excuse me Agent Carson but you've picked the wrong person. Myka is the most scrupulous person you will ever find. You'll not uncover even a mathematical error on her tax returns," HG all but laughed.
"Thank you for clearing that up, too Helena. But I feared as much so I did a little digging. It would seem that while Myka Bering might be good at her taxes, her parents are not," Karen said with too much confidence.
"So help me God …," HG said getting out of her seat.
"Helena, God will not help you when you're up against us," Karen said. "Now if you don't sit down I will put this plan into action so fast, Myka's parents will be in trouble before you have time to get back to the dining room," Karen snapped.
Helena decided the woman could very much be insane and she better listen. She did not want any harm coming to Myka's parents.
"I have several files on the Bering's and their little book store. Now, even if their daughter crossed her t's and dotted her i's - it seems her father has not been so careful. I noticed some deductions that he has been taking all these many years in error. They've gone unnoticed but I have put his name on a list and if anything does not go my way, his name goes up that list to the number one spot. An investigation by the IRS can be messy and take a very long time," Karen laid out her threat.
"I will give them the money," Helena said quickly.
"Yeah, well I know you're loaded but I think the investigation could take its toll on the Bering's," Karen said.
"What do you want from me?" Helena finally asked.
"Well, for starters – I want the fifteen thousand a month," Karen said.
"And the IRS won't think it's unusual that an agent has that kind of money?" HG asked.
"Helena, the mere fact that we know where to look for it, means we know where to put it," Karen said slyly.
"Fine, take the money. But you must guarantee me you will do nothing to the Bering's or so help me…," Helena said.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Karen said boldly. "Helena, calm down. You'll get that guarantee but I want more."
"Agent Carson, I do not understand why you're doing this but I don't care. But I will personally see to your demise…," HG started.
"Oh how noble of you Helena. So protective of Agent Bering. Is she your lover?" the blonde asked and Helena jumped to her feet again.
"Helena, one call is all I have to make. In fact, if I don't return to work, it is the first file they will look at. Now I am done being nice to you. Make arrangements for that money to be sent to me. I will tell you what else I want," Karen said anger in her voice. "Now sit down!"
"What else could you possibly want? My other money is tied up in the estate, I cannot get it," HG said to the agent as she retook her seat.
"Oh, Helena. I don't need more of your money just yet. No, what I want is you, Helena. There is so much to you – the money, the mystery, that accent. There for the taking. And I intend to take it all," Karen said staring at Helena up and down. "You will personally visit me when I say and we will spend quality time together," the blonde said. "Now after last night, I think my leaving today will be welcomed by all. But I do not want your boss checking on me so you make sure you tell her everything is OK, Helena."
The woman walked behind the couch where Helena was sitting lost in her thoughts about what to do.
"It won't be all bad, Helena. I can promise you that," Karen said as she slid her hand along HG's jaw. Helena instinctively grabbed for it and held it tightly.
"The Bering's are getting on in years, are they not?" she asked and HG immediately let go of her hand.
"That's better, Helena," the woman purred in her ear and the pain rose in Helena's chest.
This character in no way represents what IRS Agents are really like and is totally a rogue. And I'm not just saying that cause it's tax season :-)
