Kiss My Eyes
Briar Elwood
A/N: Don't own Hate Me by Blue October.
SPOILERS FOR LINE IN THE SAND.
Chapter VI
Hate Me
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
"Vala?" Sam asked, knocking on the ex-con's door. "Vala, are you all right?"
It was silent before the door creaked open a fraction. Sam could see Vala's grey eye peeking out at the colonel, watery and red. After making sure Sam was alone, the former thief opened the door farther to let Sam in, and scuttled to the side, hiding in the shadows. Sam frowned, flicking on the light before shutting the door behind her. Vala squawked, grabbing a blanket from her bed and throwing it over her head.
"It's too bright," she whined. Sam frowned, snatching the blanket away.
"Vala, this isn't healthy," she reprimanded. "It's afternoon, you can't spend day after day hiding from the world in the darkness of your quarters!"
"Actually," Vala grumbled brightly, grabbing at the blanket unsuccessfully, "I can."
Sam kept a firm hold on the blanket, glaring. "Vala. We need your help."
"I don't see why we're looking for him!" Vala exclaimed suddenly. "He's a traitor, let him go elope with my daughter!"
"Vala, we can't!" Sam argued. "We either have to get him back or…get rid of him."
"Then get rid of him!" Vala screeched. "And don't try to be nice about it, I know what it means! Same as exterminate, execute, assassinate, dispose of; they all mean kill!!"
Sam took a step towards her, holding out a hand to comfort her. "Vala—"
"No!" Her eyes wild, Vala thrust Sam's hand away, whirling around to the wall, slamming her fists into it. Suddenly losing enthusiasm, her shoulders fell and she slumped against the wall. Sam stared at her, surprised, watching as Vala shuddered, suppressing a sob.
"Vala…." The colonel walked closer, cautiously reaching a hand out to touch the former space pirate's shoulder. She flinched slightly, but didn't push her away, and Sam gently nudged her so Vala was facing the colonel. In the brief moment before Vala sunk into Sam's arms, Sam saw the distinctive shine of tears on Vala's face.
"I hate him," Vala chocked, clutching Sam's arms like they were her only chance of survival.
"If you did," Sam pointed out softly, "you wouldn't be this upset."
A huff of breath left Vala's mouth in a pathetic attempt to laugh.
"I love him," she admitted quietly. "I always knew he'd never love me back but some part of me…"
"Always hoped," Sam finished for her. "I know what you mean."
Vala looked up to stare into Sam's comforting blue eyes, smiling weakly. "Thanks."
Sam smiled back. "Hey. Us girls need to stick together to band against the forces of boyish evil."
So I'll drive so ------ far away
"Doctor!" Tomin stopped. "Uh…Jackson. Daniel." He smiled awkwardly. "I'm not quite sure how to address you."
Daniel looked up from his meditation, a slight smiled on his lips as well. "Daniel's fine. I'm not exactly a fan of being all high and mighty."
"Too humble for that?" Tomin joked. Daniel's lips twitched.
"Sure."
Tomin sat across from Daniel, eyeing the Orici's lover, smiled fading. "Most would be happy in your position."
Daniel raised an eyebrow. "I though we established I'm too humble—"
Tomin shook his head. "I mean, to share the Orici's bed."
Daniel's eyes widened slightly and he winced. I…I am happy…"
"But not completely," Tomin pushed. Daniel's embarrassment snapped to a glare.
"I though I was supposed to be treated with respect," he bit angrily. Tomin dropped his eyes.
"Sorry, sir," he mumbled. "I will accept my punishment."
Daniel softened, sighing. "Tomin…." He closed his eyes in frustration at himself. "I read the files of the missions I was gone for when I was at the base," he started. Tomin looked up again, unsure of where Daniel was going with this. "Heard you actually stood up to a Prior and almost was executed for it."
Tomin smiled wryly, remembering. "It was only by the mercy of the Orici that I'm still here," Tomin told Daniel. "I did not go unpunished. I've been set back in my place."
Daniel met the man's gaze, face set as stone. "Don't let them do that to you, Tomin. And if you really don't have the courage, at least don't crawl before me. It's uncomfortable."
Tomin almost looked away, ashamed, but Daniel's order was against that, so he stared back into the other man's eyes, afraid to break the silence. Finally, Daniel dropped his stare, speaking.
"You think I am unhappy," he stated. "Why?"
"The only time you smile is when you're with the Orici," Tomin explained. "When she is not, there is a cloud in your eyes, as if you are no longer here, but in another time…when you were happier."
"Maybe I am simply longing for Adria," Daniel suggested, an unconvincing smile playing on his lips.
"Maybe," Tomin agreed, "but I don't think so."
Daniel didn't answer, staring at his knees. Tomin watched as the cloud he had mentioned appeared, turning Daniel's piercing blue eyes to a dull, almost grey color. Realizing suddenly what he was doing, Daniel shook his head, smiling wryly. When he was at home, he daydreamed of Adria, when he was with Adria he daydreamed of home.
"Tell me what Vala was like when you first me her," he said. Tomin frowned. Daniel was trying to make it seem like he was changing the subject but Tomin wasn't entirely positive he was...
Tomin shrugged. "She was nice. Very much an individual, though. She seemed weak, at times. But at others, extremely strong." He smiled, remembering. "Almost as if she was constantly going through her monthly cycle."
Daniel smiled as well. "I don't think she ever became an adult emotionally."
Tomin frowned. "I'm sure she has," he argued. "I think she simply doesn't want to. I'm guessing she got a taste of that one time, decided she didn't like it, and so she tries to act like it never happened."
"Qe'tesh," Daniel mumbled, recognizing the truth in Tomin's words. Tomin frowned, confused.
"What's that?"
Daniel shook his head. "A while ago, before I met her, Vala was a host to one of the Goa'uld. The Goa'uld's name was Qe'tesh. I'm betting that's the time she got a taste of the nastiness of adulthood."
Tomin nodded. "That would make sense." A comfortable silence settled between the two men. Daniel stared at his knees, unaware of Tomin's concerned gaze on him.
"You miss her, don't you?" Tomin asked suddenly. Daniel's head jolted up.
"I miss all of them," he defended himself quietly. The silence resumed. "Do you miss her?" Daniel asked. Tomin smiled.
"Who wouldn't?"
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry
A/N: And it's starting to slow because I'm at a really good point in Origin and am totally focusing on that...
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