Mira: Welcome to another installment of MAD Academy!
Lane: Today is our Ed's wonderful birthday!
Envy: Of course you don't know the EXACT date so…
Mira& Lane: SHH!
Ed: Mira and Lane do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.
Al: I'm really starting to like you guys. Haha.
MAD Academy
A Collaborative Project by:
Mira Hinder and Lane Render
A Fullmetal Alchemist
Crack / Alternate Universe Fanime
Mira's POV
Ed's Birthday: The Elric's House
Al let us into the house when we knocked, "Brother's still asleep…"
"Well that won't do!" Lane pointed a finger in the air in a triumphant way, "Mira go wake him up."
"Why do I always have to do your dirty work?" I complained, half-jokingly.
She pushed me forwards into the house and I tripped all over myself, nearly falling over the arm of the couch where Ed lay sleeping. I peered at his sleeping form; his hair, un-tucked from his usual braid was piled into disarray around his head and he was snoring softly, "H-Hey Alphonse?" I caught his little brother's eyes.
"Yeah?" Al, unlike Ed, was showered and dressed.
"Does he always sleep with his stomach out?"
"Yeah," he laughed, "Old habits I think."
I looked back to Ed. It felt just pain wrong to even consider waking him up. He slept like a baby.
…
So instead I started cooking food.
It was pretty early in the morning, so I wasn't surprised that I soon had a little crowd at the table in the kitchen. I looked over at the four of them and just laughed, "Hungry much?"
They all nodded in unison and grinned at me.
Ed's POV
I woke to the smell of bacon. Great way to start my morning. Food.
I smiled to myself and stretched before sitting up, loving the way I could finally feel all the muscles in my body again. Don't get me wrong. Automail was cool and all, but being able to feel with all four of my limbs just feels so much better.
I scratched the back of my head and made my way into the kitchen in just boxers and a tee shirt, like always.
"Brother, go put on some pants," Al told me as Lane and Mira both took one look at me and started giggling.
I immediately ran to my room to find a pair of pants.
…
Lane's POV
We all sat around the Elrics' kitchen table stuffing our faces with the massive amount of food that Mira and I had cooked up (she had started the cooking but of course I joined in.) I had hardly any patience with cooking when I was hungry.
"So," Ed started, and everyone looked up from their plates, "Why are you guys even here?"
"Whaaaa-?" I half-shouted, "Are you serious Ed? It's your birthday! What would a birthday be without you're friends invading your house really early in the morning."
"Oh," he blinked. "I forgot."
"WHHAAA-?" Wrath and I chorused. "YOU FORGOT YOUR OWN BIRTHDAY!"
"Um, yeah? Relax, would you?"
"I can't!" I shouted. "You forgot you're birthday! PREPARE YOURSELF FOR FUN TIMES!"
He leaned over to Mira and I heard him mutter, "Should I be afraid?"
"THAT"S IT! WE'RE GOING OUTSIDE AND PLAYING IN THE SNOW LIKE WE'RE FIVE AND YOU'RE GONNA ENJOY IT DAMMIT BECAUSE IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!"
"She get's hyper when she gets up early," Mira told him.
"Al! Ed!"
"YES!" they both shouted in unison, looking slightly afraid.
"Prepare yourselves! Get dressed!"
"Yes ma'am!" They both ran off down the hallway.
"Wear your new hat Al!" Envy called down the hallway.
"Of course!" I heard Al call back.
…
Ed's POV
I stepped into the front yard and blocked my eyes from the blinding reflection of the snow. Mira, Lane, Envy, and Wrath were already outside. Al ran past me and jumped off of our front steps, laughing like a little kid.
I realized that it's been forever since he's been able to see snow in his normal body. He must be really happy.
I was too busy smiling to myself to see the snowball before it hit my face, "ENVY!" I shouted.
"This time it wasn't me!" he pointed over at Mira, who had a snowball in each hand, grinning from ear to ear.
I just stared at her for a second then grinned, "It's so on, Hinder!"
"Come and get it, Elric!"
I jumped off the steps and scooped up some snow in my hands. I threw it and Lane, because she's her, managed to walk right in front of Mira and receive a snowball in the face.
"EDWARD!" Lane grabbed a hunk of snow and chucked it at me. Her aim was off to the left and it smacked Al in the chest.
"Brother, I think it's time for war," Al said calmly beside me.
"I agree."
Lane and Mira look terrified when we turned to them, armed with snow.
"I'm on their side!" Envy called to the girl, running to us.
Lane shouted, "You traitor!" while Mira quickly grabbed Wrath and held him possessively.
Lane's POV
Mira and I ended up standing in front of Wrath as human shields as he built our fort. But it was worth it, because Wrath made awesome forts quickly. I got too nitpicky about them when I made them and Mira just kinda…sucked.
Envy was on the same mission on the boys side. Al was huffing, little puffs of condensed breath coming from his mouth, his nose and cheeks bright red. I smacked him in the face.
Ed had a shit-eating grin as he dodged on of Mira's snowballs, hitting both of us in the stomach with snowballs of his own.
This war went on for quite a bit before Mira and I looked at each other and nodded before popping up from behind our shelter and yelling, "WE SURRENDER!"
"WIMPS!" Envy called from behind their shelter.
"IT'S COLD!"
"YOU'RE SUCH GIRLS!" Ed yelled.
"WHATEVER!" we ran inside under a torrent of snowballs from Envy and the Elrics.
"Alright!" Mira said breathlessly, pulling off her mittens. "Time to back a cake."
. . .
The house smelt delicious. And we didn't use box stuff, we made our own cake. And our own frosting. Mira handed me an icing pipe from inside her back and I set to work putting the finishing touches on the cake. Peeking up from the counter I pulled back the curtain a bit to see the boys chucking the snow at each other. Envy had gone to Wrath's team, and the two pairs of brothers were in a full out war, the sun setting behind them.
Just as I finished piping and sticking the candles in, I heard the door open. Mira got them out of their coats and shoes and ushered them into the living room. I lit each candle and shouted, "Turn off the lights!"
I walked out with the cake.
"Awesome!" Ed said, taking a look at the cake.
Self satisfied, I thought, 'Fucking right, it's awesome.' I had covered the whole chocolate cake in white vanilla icing, piping the little ridges around the bottom and again all around the top of the cake.
He then noticed what the red icing on top said, 'Happy Birthday, Shortie.' He shouted, "I'm not-!"
Mira and I cut him off, beginning to sing "Happy Birthday to You" and the boys followed our lead, drowning Ed out.
"Now make a wish!" Mira urged him on.
Ed's POV
What to wish for? Wishes were dumb I knew that much and I could just blow out the candles pretending I had made one, but it got me thinking. For years if I could just wish for something and have it, it would have been an obvious choice. A few months ago I would have just wished to go home with Al.
But now. I could still make a choice to just leave and not be hurt too bad. I hadn't known any of them for long enough. And the doppelganger thing was seriously creepy. But I was happy. And they made me laugh. And I could seriously see them being some seriously good friends in the long run. We could make a good life here, Al and I.
I shook off these weird thoughts as I blew out the candle and Lane handed me the knife saying, "You've gotta make the first cut! But, after that, I don't trust you with it."
. . .
I followed Mira into the kitchen after she announced she was going to make hot chocolate. Wrath shoved me out of the way and grabbed onto the back of her shirt, "Mira could I have mine first?" he tugged on her shirt and smiled sweetly up at her.
"Of course, Wrath honey," she smiled at him and filled a teapot that she found in one of the cabinets with water. I hung back by the archway that led into the kitchen while Wrath left the room and started to think of her voice. I haven't heard her sing much since that first time. I was tempted to ask her to…
She turned and sat up on the counter next to the stove. Noticing I was there, she smiled.
I tried to manage a smile back, but I obviously failed.
"Something wrong?" she beckoned for me to come closer to her.
I stepped forward, "Nah. Just thinkin'…"
"About what?" she asked.
I diverted the conversation off of my weird thought, "I guess about my wish."
"What about it?"
"I didn't make one…" I mumbled, "I was going to wish for," I paused and fixed my speech before I spilled about wanting to get Al's body back before now, "a way to get back home. But…"
"But..?" she nodded, trying to get me to speak.
"I feel like I'm starting to feel fine where I'm at."
Mira's POV
I grinned without meaning to, "Well that's good. At least you're getting comfortable with all the cra—"
"HEY MIRA! ED! QUIT MAKING BABIES IN THERE AND FINISH WITH THE HOT CHOCOLATE!"
Ed and I gave one another awkward looks. Then we turned our heads toward the living room and yelled, "SHUT UP AND GO MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND ENVY!"
"WILL DO!" he cackled and I heard Lane squeak followed by a thud.
Al and Wrath came into the kitchen and sat at the table without a word.
…
Al's POV
Once we made sure Lane and Envy weren't doing anything inappropriate in the living room (a.k.a Mira went in there and threatened to hose them off if they didn't stop contaminating the couch with their love germs) we all sat on the floor around the coffee table and sipped hot chocolate.
Mira suddenly perked up like she remembered something big, "Where's your guys' dad?"
"Work," Ed answered without flinching, unlike me. I figured I looked like a deer in headlights.
"Oh," she nodded, like that made sense. Before she could ask anything else her phone rang. She jumped up and fished it out of her pocket. Not even bothering to look at the caller ID, she picked up, "Hello?" she paused for a short second, "Hey bro."
Lane and Envy smirked at one another and nodded.
"Yeah I'm fine. Hey listen do you think I cou—"
Lane moaned very loudly. I blushed.
Mira glared down at Lane, "It's nothing. As I was saying I was wo—"
Envy made a moaning sound as well.
Mira smacked him on the back of the head, "I was wondering if I could st—"
Lane and Envy both made a really inappropriate noise together and then Envy said, "Hey Mira, come back," in a very dirty tone of voice.
Mira, Ed, and I all stared open-mouthed at him.
"Nevermind…" Mira hung up the phone after a quick goodbye and went to jump on Envy, "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
"It wasn't just me!" he insisted, backing up and laughing really hard.
"Yeah! But she knows karate! I know I can take you out easy!"
. . .
After the swift punishment of Lane and Envy, we all wandered into the living room with our hot chocolate.
"And now it's time for Ed's birthday present!" Mira cheered.
Envy and Lane come up behind the couch where Ed was sitting, picking up a huge sack together and dumping a ridiculous amount of chocolate over his head.
"Oh, I am so happy with you people right now," Ed said, grinning.
"Guys," I said, "not trying to ruin the good times or anything, but it's like midnight." I pointed toward a clock on our wall.
Lane proceeded to fake cry, "Why, are you kicking us out?" She hide her face in Envy's shoulder wailing, "He doesn't love us anymore!"
"I only meant, aren't your parents gonna get worried."
"I told mom not to expect us home. I generally tell her that whenever we go out," Envy stated.
Lane snorted. "Mother dearest doesn't give a fuck," she made a displeased face. That was definitely going to be a story sometime in the future. And I had a feeling it wouldn't be a pleasant one.
"Jake probably won't care, as long as Envy and Lane don't make sex noises or shout anything about drugs when I call him again," Mira told us.
"So basically," Lane said, "we're not leaving unless you kick us out."
Brother and I shrugged at each other. "You can stay," we chorused.
"ESP, they haz it," Lane whispered loudly in Envy's ear.
We all laughed
…
Mira's POV
We all managed to find more than enough pillows and blankets to make a comfy little nest on the living room floor. Lane and Envy curled up on the right side of the nest and they were mumbling to each other quietly. Wrath was sitting next to Alphonse grinning and talking to him. Ed and I were tossing some pillows into the nest, neither of us afraid to hit Lane and Envy.
I had changed into pajamas that my brother brought for Lane and me. During which time I had to promise him I wouldn't, "do anything stupid."
"You think you can get them to calm down?" Ed looked at me like, 'if they're hyper any longer I might just shoot them.'
I giggled at his face and then nodded, "Leave it to me."
I climbed into the spot beside Al and sighed at how soft the pile of blankets had made the floor. Then I started to sing:
"Waking up I see that everything is okay,
The first time in my life and now it's so great,
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed,
I think about the little things that make life great,
I wouldn't change a thing about it,
This is the best feeling."
Ed clicked the light off as everyone fell silent. I smiled to myself, feeling as if my voice was magical. I felt Ed come and sit next to me.
"This innocence is brilliant,
I hope that it will stay,
This moment is perfect,
Please don't go away,
I need you now,
And I'll hold on to it,
Don't you let it pass you by…"
I would have kept singing, if not for the yawn that escaped my lips.
Envy chuckled softly, "Someone's trying to tell us to get to bed."
"Nah. I think I almost put myself to sleep," I giggled.
There was the sound of shuffling as everyone got comfortable. I tried to not touch either of the Elrics, but it was hard. I was kinda sandwiched in between them. I kinda scooted towards Ed more. He was warmer.
"You should sing something else."
Ed's POV
I didn't exactly think before I spoke…
I heard Mira yawn from next to me, and, it seemed like she didn't even have to think about it, she started singing again:
"Could you whisper in my ear,
The things you wanna feel,
I'd give you anythin',
To feel it comin'."
Everyone was quiet again.
"Do you wake up on your own,
And wonder where you are,
You live with all your faults."
I could just make out the shape of everyone lying down.
"I wanna wake up where you are,
I won't say anything at all,
So why don't you slide…"
She trailed off.
"Looks like someone was enchanted by Mira's voice," Envy snickered again.
I didn't offer any response.
"It's fine Ed. As you can see, none of us can help but shut up when she opens her damn mouth."
"I love you too, Lane," Mira murmured.
There was a pause. Then Lane spoke:
"…The rest of that song makes me think of my parents."
"How so?" Al asked.
She paused and then said, "There's a verse that says, 'Don't you love the like you killed? The priest is on the phone. Your father hit the wall. Your ma disowned you'…"
"Oh…"
Lane's POV
Envy held me closer to him and I sighed. I figured I should explain to the Elrics what Mira, Envy and Wrath already knew. But I didn't, "It's alright," Envy murmured into my ear.
I relaxed. Yeah. From sexual best friends to caring couple. Who knew?
Yeah. It was pretty much lights out for me after that.
Envy's POV
"She asleep Envy?" Mira asked.
I pulled the blanket up over Lane's shoulders and kissed the top of her blonde head, "Yeah I think so."
She moved her head a little on my chest and the smell of vanilla filled my nose. Such a sweet smell…
"Envy are you smelling her or something?" Mira snickered.
"Pssh. No," I chuckled at her.
"Ah!" I heard Ed stifle a yell, "Mira your feet are cold!"
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to!" I heard a shuffling sound as she adjusted her position.
I snickered again. What a delightfully awkward pair. Yep. Still failing English.
All of a sudden Al started snoring softly.
"Awww, we bored him to sleep," I grinned.
Mira giggled, "Wrath? You still awake?"
Silence.
"Guess not."
With that we all fell silent and I drifted off to sleep.
Mira: Just saying, we all know they have Elric Telepathy.
Lane: Well duh!
Envy: So yeah. Me and Lane are going to use your bed tonight after you fall asleep, Shortie. –winks-
Ed: Oh no you're not!
Al: Please don't…
Mira: R&R people!
