1"WOOHOO!"

This was truly Kenny's lucky day. Not only did he score an easy hundred bucks out of Token, but the flowers he was planning to buy with it were on sale. Kenny browsed around the small flower shop a while, trying to determine what sort of bouquet Bebe might like. He had originally planned to go with the typical choice of roses, but some asshole had already snatched up the last one before he had gotten there.

Kenny finally came to the realistic conclusion that Bebe would like any kind of flowers he picked out for her. It was the thought that counted after all. What kind of girl receives flowers from a guy, on a non-holiday no less, and then complains that they aren't the right type? This actually made Kenny's task even harder. Being heterosexual, he knew absolutely nothing about what constituted good flowers. Bebe appreciating anything he picked out didn't do anything to narrow down the selection process. Kenny decided to just close his eyes and point to a bouquet. He'd go with that one. How romantic.

As he opened his eyes to view his selection, he smiled. His luck had increased yet again. His finger had picked a flower identified by its label as goldenrod. The petals were yellow, just like Bebe's hair. Kenny envisioned himself pointing that out to her when he gave her the bouquet in school tomorrow. Damn he was smooth. He grabbed the goldenrod bouquet and headed for the counter.

"God dammit, these aren't the right flowers! Do you speak English asshole?!"

Kenny's eyes widened. Wow, this really was his lucky day. Cartman was at the front of the store, raising hell about something or other. Kenny hadn't gotten around to talking to him on Wendy's behalf yet. Now he could get that out of the way while buying Bebe's gift. Two birds with one stone. Kenny was tempted to pinch himself again.

He got in line right behind the fat boy. "Hey dude" he said to get Cartman's attention.

"Not now Kenny," Cartman replied. He was still dealing with the guy behind the counter.

"Sir I'm sorry, but our store just doesn't carry black roses. Do you want the regular ones or not?"

Cartman rudely snatched the flowers from the employee's hand. He glared at the man's nametag. His name was Steve.

"That's fahn. You just made my list, Steve!"

"I'm terrified" Steve replied sarcastically. "Cash or charge?"

Cartman smirked. "Cash"

Slowly Cartman dug through his wallet, trying to "find" wherever he had put his money. Once "found" he began slapping one-dollar bills down on the counter top, despite visibly having larger amounts of money inside his wallet. He counted the money out dollar by dollar as the line behind him grew longer and more hostile. Cartman looked up at Steve. Steve was annoyed. Cartman's revenge had been achieved, and faster than usual.

Seeing that this was going to take a while, Kenny tried speaking again. "Why are you getting roses?"

"I'm trying to get a date to the dance since your ghetto trash sister has no taste in men."

"Fuck you!"

Steve interrupted. "Sir, there's a line. If you'd like to maybe step to the side so I can help the next person-"

"Actually Steve, I'm having a conversation with the next person," Cartman pointed out with disdain in his voice. "It's not our fault your crappy little store only has one register."

Steve could only sigh in response. Victorious once again, Cartman turned his attention back to Kenny.

"Who're you buying a faggy bouquet for?"

"Bebe"

Cartman scoffed. "Pussy"

Kenny shrugged his shoulders. "I am what I eat. Who are your flowers for?"

"That goth chick, Henrietta."

Kenny raised his eyebrow. "Really?"

"I wanted black roses, but this lame-ass store doesn't carry them," Cartman complained.

Seeing an opening for a logical segue into the topic he needed to cover, Kenny said "Hey, if Henrietta says no, what about Wendy?"

"Wendy?" Cartman questioned. "Why Wendy?"

It was a good question. Of all the girls Kenny could've mentioned, why her? Kenny thought fast.

"Um, well, you're always saying what a ho she is. Maybe she'd be your ho."

The smile Cartman got from messing with Steve disappeared instantly. His head and eyes dropped sadly toward the floor.

"I can't ask her dude."

"Why not?"

Cartman's eyes narrowed as he looked back at his blonde friend. "Because" he said with rapidly vanishing patience. "What do you care anyway? You're trying to get with her best friend aren't you?"

"Well yeah-"

"Then shut up already, god. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some flower petals to paint black."

Cartman plunked down his last dollar and left the store, much to Steve's delight. Kenny purchased his flowers and left as well, walking toward home. He was sure he didn't get enough of an answer to satisfy Wendy, but at least he could go back to her with something. He had legitimately tried to get Cartman to talk, and now he was off the hook. His only obligations left were to talk to his sister about Token, and give Bebe her flowers. Maybe it was coincidence, or maybe some deserved good luck had finally come his way. Either way, things were looking up for Kenny McCormick.

At least until that drunk driver's car got onto the sidewalk.

As the life faded from his body under the tires of the vehicle, one thought came to Kenny's mind.

"Luck of the Irish my ass."

To Be Continued