A/N: Being on a roll is always a positive thing. Haha! I'm actually going to update this story twice in the same week! I'm completely speechless with myself (pats herself on the back).
Here's the next installment for you. It's kind of psychotic and sweet, as is usually the case with Gaara.
I think the reason why I manage to capture his character is because I have a mini Shukaku living inside me… (ignores weird glances from readers). Hehe. I have a really nasty temper and when I get angry, well, let's just say it's not a pretty sight and the people in the immediate vicinity are in danger of being victims of vicious verbal onslaughts (my vocabulary is extremely creative when I'm angered). Therefore, I completely relate to our tanuki-possesed Kazekage in the moments when he 'loses it'. Hehehe. But don't worry, apart from this small quirk in my personality, I'm really one of the friendliest people in the world; if left alone in an empty room, I would probably strike up a conversation with the wall! XD
But enough babble, let's get this thing going!
Summary: While suffering from a paranoia attack, Gaara decides, as he is wont to do, that Sakura is the cause of it all. Thankfully, after a while of angry accusations, he realizes that in the end, it's really all in his head.
The cold desert night gripped the quiet village as the clear dark sky revealed thousands of bright stars as far as the eye could see. As it was usual, even during the daytime, very few people dared to challenge the elements of the harsh desert and only a handful of brave souls were seen outside on the streets, hastily making their way towards their respective destinations.
Among these few scurrying travelers, a lone dark figure could be seen making its way calmly through the shadowed night, walking at a moderate pace and seemingly unaffected by the freezing temperature. Lost in thought, Suna's Kazekage, his trademark gourd strapped to his back, let his feet lead him to his home while his mind concentrated completely on other matters.
The council was being difficult again and Gaara wasn't about to budge in his decision. This was why this afternoon's meeting had culminated disastrously and they were no closer to solving the issue they were facing. Due to some necessary diplomatic procedures, a shinobi team needed to be sent to the Thunder Country in an effort to negotiate a free trade treaty and Suna needed leverage for the terms to shift more in their favor. Therefore, they needed to offer something unique… something none of the other countries had.
That was when a retarded member of his council came up with the bright idea of sending Sakura along with the shinobi team.
Gaara gave him 3 seconds to explain himself before he would send him flying out the window.
As the council discussed the idea, all of them were completely convinced that the pink haired medic was the solution to their problems. She could go to the Thunder Country and offer her medic services on their behalf for a short period of time; with her diversity of skills and amazing knowledge, they would be able to sign the treaty without further complications. It was a stroke of genius and would save all of them precious time, since they really needed to concentrate on other matters and there were many other things to take care of and…
The Kazekage fell into a full temper tantrum right about then.
Insulting the very much questioned intelligence harbored in their diminutive brains, he let them know, in utmost terms, that the proposition they had just come up with was absolutely out of the question. Gaara didn't give a shit if he was disrespecting them with his shouting as he pointedly reminded them that Sakura was not a Suna shinobi. Her village was Konoha and she didn't have the obligation to go on any missions on Suna's behalf and would only do so if she wanted to.
In that instant, another council member implied that, due to her personal relationship with the Kazekage, the pink haired kunoichi would have no qualms about doing him a personal favor, especially when it was for the good of his village.
That was when the sand threw all of them out of the council room.
Gaara's angry shouting echoed throughout the whole building as all of Suna's committee members ran for cover. How could they even think that he would exploit his relationship with Sakura in such a way? How could they even conceive the thought of using his lover as an 'easy way out' of this problem? How could they even imply that she leave his side to go on a stupid mission which had nothing to do with her in the first place?
From where he was standing in the middle of the meeting room, the Kazekage ordered the scattered members of his council not to bother him with their presence until they came up with a solution which didn't involve the participation of a shinobi from a foreign village. Didn't Suna possess qualified ninjas of its own? Did they always have to depend on their allies to help them?
Gaara's bellows were heard around a half a mile radius. Such insolence would eventually cost him, but at the moment, he was far from caring.
He locked himself in his office for the rest of the day, pouring over his work and trying to keep his anger in check. Mercifully, his tactics worked, since he had many reports to go over and he didn't even notice when darkness feel across his window. When he was interrupted by a soft knocking on the door, he realized his temper had abated significantly as he let the person outside enter.
It was one of his genins. The young girl came into his office shyly, carrying a tray of food for him.
"Haruno-san said you might be hungry," she said respectfully, "she sent this for you and wanted me to tell you that you shouldn't forget to eat, no matter how fascinating your work is."
The girl dropped her eyes to the floor in embarrassment, cheeks flushing slightly. She was standing here, in her leader's office and seemingly reproaching him working too much. It was completely unheard of. However, it had been none other than Haruno Sakura, the famously skilled medic, who had asked her for this personal favor… and you just didn't turn her down.
The sarcasm in his lover's statement echoed clearly in the young girl's words and Gaara found himself smirking, imagining the expression in her pretty face whenever she used irony to prove a point.
"Thank you," he said to the genin. "You can leave the tray here. And tell Haruno-san she shouldn't worry so much. You can go home now, Maiya."
Slightly surprised that he actually knew her name, the young girl smiled at him as she blushed. Bowing in respect, she made her way hurriedly out the door.
That had been a couple hours ago and he hadn't been able to completely finish going over his reports but he had decided it was definitely time to call it a day.
Hence, he found himself walking down the streets of his village at present, making his way home at a leisurely pace.
There was something in the back of his mind which was bothering him, but he couldn't quiet place it. True, that afternoon's outburst was still affecting his mood and whenever he thought about the council's impudence, his stomach would clench in anger all over again. Despite this fact, he was aware that there was something nagging at him which had nothing do with his earlier rage… or maybe it did.
As he was wont to do when confronted by an illusive thought, he breathed deeply, forcing himself into a state of calm. Making sure that Shukaku was locked away in the darkest recesses of his mind, he allowed himself to pinpoint the uncomfortable feeling he had been ignoring since he had hidden himself up in his office.
It didn't take long to for it to reach the surface.
His council thought he was getting weak. It was the only way to explain their reaction that afternoon. The suggestions they had offered concerning the free trade problem they were facing would never have surfaced before… they would have never dared to suggest such a mediocre solution, not when they knew that their lives would be in danger if they did so.
But today, all of the members of the council had actually spoken up against him without any evident qualms while they were doing so. They expressed no fear when speaking to him and they even went so far as to involve his lover in the situation.
This was a completely unprecedented event.
Gaara didn't know if having his committee members coming up to him and expressing themselves without any hesitation was a good thing or not. He was used to ruling with discipline and maybe with a little bit of fear; but fear meant respect, and he wouldn't have it any other way. Uncertain if this train of events was a positive one, the Kazekage was reluctant to change the way he had handled his political position, especially when things seemed to be changing in the way his subordinates were relating to him.
And the cause for this change was evident… it pointed directly to a single person. A person he had thrown a tantrum this very afternoon to defend.
Sakura
His relationship with her had affected him in all kinds of levels and had affected the way his people perceived him. Gaara was no longer the unapproachable monster he used to be, and even though they hadn't exactly warmed up to him, they weren't openly hostile towards him anymore. They had always kept a safe distance and the red head had been happy with that. He wasn't exactly comfortable with interpersonal relationships yet and secretly, he would sometimes panic when he was forced to relate to someone personally. A barrier would always be placed as protection, it was an unconscious self-defense mechanism he had instinctively created and his people respected it… they always knew it was there.
But when Sakura came along, they started to overstep that barrier. By seeing the way he was capable of relating to someone else, an inexplicable source of courage invaded his subordinates and they started to overstep their bonds… one of his assistants would always make a point of bringing him a cup of coffee in the morning, or his council members would greet him with genuine smiles when he walked by or the janitor who took care of his building would say a friendly 'good night' when it was time for him to go home.
Knowing it was completely ridiculous to worry about these small things, the Kazekage had let them slide. But they just kept happening and wouldn't go away. These were events Gaara had never experienced in his life and they disconcerted him to no end. He knew they were normal interactions which happened between normal people… but since when had he, Sabaku no Gaara, Shukaku's vessel, had ever been included in any type of normal interaction?
The answer was never, not even when he had been elected leader. These types of encounters unsettled him and when he was unsettled, he felt weak… and when he thought he was weak, he would get angry… extremely angry. That was the way he had always worked, ever since the day he was born and joined with the wretched demon living inside of him.
And his council knew this… they saw and tried to exploit that weakness. It was the only way to explain the events of their earlier meeting. Not for the first time, Gaara congratulated himself on the way he had handled the situation. It had been an efficient reminder of the way things truly were, so that they would never forget who he was.
'But didn't you want to end your loneliness?' a small voice inside his head said. Taken by surprise by the unexpected thought, the Kazekage stopped dead in his tracks in the middle of the street.
He immediately recognized the truth behind the statement, and memories of his desperate and miserable childhood came flooding back to him. It was true… throughout his life he had craved for the interaction he was now receiving; he had wanted to be treated precisely in this way and he would have given his life to achieve such acknowledgement from another person back then.
But the truth was that, when he did receive it, he was completely unprepared for it. It had been dropped unexpectedly on his lap and he had no idea what to do with it… no idea of how he should react, what things he should say, what gestures he should make. Whenever someone was friendly towards him, his first instinct was always to flee, to get the hell out of there… either that, or to wrap the person up in sand and end their existence for daring to come so close, for daring to defy his barriers.
To say that such vulnerability did not sit well with him with a complete and utter understatement. Sabaku no Gaara was anything but vulnerable and he defended himself with the weapon he knew best how to use…
Anger
And this moment in time was not an exception.
Just what the hell had Sakura done to him?
Who did she think she was, to come barging into his life and changing his world without his consent? Who gave her the authority to come over to his village and cause such commotion? He had been doing a great job as Kazekage before she got here… things were simple and straightforward. He ruled and his subordinates respected him by keeping their distance. It had been functioning perfectly until she decided to step in.
Bursting into motion once more, Gaara's now furious steps where completely at odds with the relaxing pace he had previously used. He would give her a piece of his mind before this night was over and things would be returning to the way he preferred. It was his village, his job and it was his decision to choose the best way to perform his duties.
As he walked, he thought more about the whole situation and realized the extent in which the pink haired medic had affected him. Not only had she changed his surroundings, she was starting to change him… to change the way he behaved towards others.
If he remembered correctly, he had called the young genin who had brought him food earlier this night by her name. Her name! And not only that, but he had acted in a completely paternal manner towards her by telling her she should go home and rest…
What the fuck had that been about?
Since when did he make a point of referring to his shinobi in such a personal manner? They were his ninja, the murderous tools with which he provided a better life for Suna. They were born with a single purpose, to serve their village and their leader with unconditional loyalty to provide a brighter future for the coming generations.
But then he had to behave all friendly towards the young girl… no wonder that others just like her were harassing him on the street!
The Kazekage had changed into a complete wuss and the word was spreading through the village like wildfire.
Growling at himself for his stupidity, he let his sand take him the rest of the way, its furious tendrils slashing out as he went.
He almost tore the door off its hinges. Walking at a brusque pace, he threw his gourd on the floor, making an awful racket. When he didn't see Sakura in the living room or in the kitchen, he stalked his way towards the bedroom, a deadly scowl on his face.
Turning to enter the open door, he took in a deep breath, the beginnings of an angry bellow working their way up his throat.
But he froze in his tracks, his words coming out in an unintelligible gurgle as he choked down his yell with a cough.
There she was on the bed, lying on her side facing the door. She was wearing her preferred tank top and boxer pajamas, an arm cradling her head while her other hand held a magazine loosely on the matress.
She was absolutely and utterly asleep, looking like a celestial being sent to share her grace with the lesser beings of this world.
Despite the din he had made on his way in, she hadn't stirred in the least. Gaara suddenly realized that she had probably tried to stay up and wait for him; the magazine explained as much, since the pink haired kunoichi usually tried to read to prevent herself from falling asleep, but this exercise would always have the opposite effect.
Before he could do anything, his heart clenched painfully with guilt. Here he was, about to pick a fight and yell at her, while she had been doing everything in her power to stay awake so she could spend a few extra moments with him before they went to bed.
He was an idiot… there was no doubt about that.
Anger completely deflating in a matter of 2.5 seconds, Gaara rubbed his face with his hands roughly. Irritation at his stupidity followed quickly, and he realized how utterly immature he had behaved.
None of the events which were taking place were Sakura's fault… in all honesty, instead of blaming her, he should've been thanking her. Even though he wasn't ready to open up to people, and he wasn't sure if he would ever be, deep inside he was aware that his subordinates' change in behavior towards him wasn't a bad thing. In fact, this change unlocked all types of possibilities in which he could improve his leadership, the only problem was that he wasn't sure if he could handle it at the moment.
During his childhood, he had suffered all types of abuses and there were certain things which were engraved too deeply in his soul for him to let go… at least for the time being. He was changing, yes, but he was far from being the most assertive person on the face of the planet. And if truth be told, he didn't want to become such a person, his personality spoke openly against it. The changes he had suffered were because he had let them happen and they did not make him weak. Just one thought of Naruto and the amazing strength he had gained by creating such bonds with other people was enough to assure Gaara of that.
He had been so eager to place the blame on someone so he could justify his apprehensiveness that he had failed to think rationally about the whole situation… as was usually the case.
Sighing, he finally willed himself to enter the room. He washed his teeth quickly and discarded his clothing, putting on the pair of sweat pants he usually slept in. Turning out all the lights, he found his way confidently towards the bed and snuggled against Sakura's back, hugging her from behind as he leaned in to kiss her cheek.
She stirred sleepily at the contact and opened her eyes slightly.
"Good, you're home," she said groggily.
He grunted in reply.
"You shouldn't stay out working so late… it's not good for you," she told him in the best scolding tone she could manage while being half asleep.
Smiling at the way her concern for him would always let itself show no matter the circumstance, he nuzzled her neck affectionately.
She turned round at that and hugged him back, tangling her legs with his. Burying her face in his throat, she was asleep even before she finished the action, her soft breaths caressing Gaara's skin.
As he let himself commence his deep meditation, the red head relished in the feeling of contentment permeating through him.
Who gave a shit if the people of his village thought he was weak. Who cared if they thought he was getting soft. Nothing in this world came even close to the feeling of having the woman you loved sleeping in your arms and no matter what taunts his subordinates or his council members threw at him, Gaara would fight them with his head held high and would not let them forget who he was.
He was the Kazekage and one of the most powerful shinobi in the world… and he had a woman to protect and to cherish, and this made him all the more powerful. There was nothing he couldn't overcome, not while she was by his side, and no matter what challenges awaited him in the future, he would meet them head on. Even if it meant greeting his assistants personally every morning or stopping to speak to the janitor for a few moments on his way out of the office… when the time came, he would be ready for them.
Looking down at his pink haired beauty one last time in the darkness, he caressed her cheek lovingly.
'I hope Maiya is sleeping just as well as she is' he thought offhandedly a moment before his mind lost contact with the world.
Wouldn't you just love to have such 'challenges' as Gaara has in your life? If I did, my life would be so much easier! XD Poor thing, they really are a big deal for him.
Hope you liked it! And don't worry, my mind will definitely come up with another vignette soon enough. Let me know what you think!
