CH. 7: The Fluttershy Effect

"Great," I thought to myself as I found myself barreling at mach, holy fucking fast down a dirt road lined with trees, bushes, and lush grass, "I get to make a new random friend due to the fact I was overpowered by three little fillies...Man I am soooooo chain-smoking when I get back to the Apple's farm. "So where are we headed again?!" I yelled over the wind and squeaks coming from the cart and scooter wheel's. "To Fluttershy's!" Cried Applebloom and Sweetie Belle. "Sounds like a very...Timid pony?" I responded mildly, dear God is everyone's name here so damn wierd?...Then again I just call myself V so I guess it could be worse. My thoughts were interrupted by the giggles of the two fillies, "I wouldn't call her timid." Said Sweetie, "Yeah," interrupted Applebloom, "Shes just shy and quiet!" "Thats...Thats what timid means Applebloom." I said rubbing my hooves against my temple. "Ohhhhhhhh well why didn't y'all say that then?" She queried. "Nevermind." I replied, "How far are we from her place anyway?" "Probably a few more seconds at the rate Scootaloo is going." Sweetie Belle said mulling it over. I then noticed both of them immediately gripping the sides of the cart tightly and before I had a chance to respond I found myself flying though the air. "SHIIIIIIIITTTTT!" Was all I could manage as I landed head first into a chicken coop. "Oh my gosh V! Guess we shoulda told ya that Scootaloo was stopping." Said a concerned Applebloom, "Ughhhhhhhh" I responded. Aside from a bump, feathers in the mouth and what I guessed was chicken shit I was ok. "Dear God that sucked." I said. Just then I heard something approaching from the side of the coop.
I was greeted with the most pissed off bunny rabbit I've ever seen and being mollywhopped by the carrot it was carrying. "Ow! The fuck?!"
I cried as the Bugs Bunny on 'roids continued to assault me, throwing an occasional karate kick that would put Chuck Norris to shame. "Oh my!" Came a weak whisper cry of surprise. "Angel I'm sure he didn't mean to wake you from your nap please stop!" The yellow pony continued to squeak timidly. After a furry haymaker I finally kicked myself back into Jarhead destroy mode and put the white ball of cuteness in a headlock, "Naptime asshole I said as I got my hold in." Seconds later the rabid wabbit was lights out, "Ok" I said getting up and dusting myself off.
The shocked Pegasus before me who I assumed was Fluttershy immediately rushed to the asshole rabbit, "Angel! Oh my goodness! Are you okay?"
"He'll be fine in a few minutes." I said rubbing my jacked up jaw, "It's just a blood choke." Fluttershy shot up with a look of waaaaaaay to pissed off and near tears she then proceeded to grab my hoof and threw me across her yard, "FUUUUCCKK!" I screamed as I landed on the ground. "Okay I think im good on flying today." I thought. "Oh my! I'm sorry I don't know what came over me!" She said helping me up, "Its alright," I said, "Your not the first one to assault me today." "And I doubt It'll be the last time knowing my apparent lack of luck" I thought. "Girls help me get your friend inside the house."
"Gotcha Fluttershy!" The fillies replied as they helped me inside her cottage. "Quaint" I smiled to her, a slight blush told me the V charm wasn't TOTALLY ineffective. They set me out on a couch as Fluttershy began to instruct the girls on how to milk cows, and Scootaloo asking what an udder was.
After leading the fillies outside she came back into the cottage and went to her kitchen returning not a minute later with an icepack. "Here you go this should help with the swelling." She said as she hoofed off the cold pack. "Thanks" I said as I took it from her and applied it gingerly to my swelled head. "Man if my guys could see me now, getting my ass handed to me by a rabbit wouldnt bode well for me." I thought somberly. Noticing the face I was making Fluttershy addressed it as much as I thought someone with a name like Fluttershy would, she fidgeted, tried to make eye contact, and finally said softly, "Um are you alright?" "Oh yeah im just upset I broke your coop door." I lied smiling meekly for added effect. "Oh well its fine im sure I can get it fixed when I get some free time." She said. "Really?" I asked, "Considering all these animals you got here I doubt you're gonna have any free time soon, especially with those three." I said gesturing a hoof outside towards the fillies manhandling a cows udders. "In fact," I added springing off the couch with such apparent quickness I must have scared her, as she yelped and fell out of the chair she was on. "Uhhhhh you good?" I asked. "I'm fine." She replied in a small heap. "Hmm well I can't leave you like that." I said. So, being no slouch to extra weight,
I Fireman...er Firepony carried her outside to the coop. By this time the fillies were being chased by about two cows, so I knew I wouldn't have a lot of time to fix the door until I'd have to rescue the three. "Wow your sure pretty strong for a little colt." Replied a surprised Fluttershy as I slung her softly to the ground. "Uh im not a colt, I'm just partly grown." I said as I began looking at the hinges and getting the tools out of my 'borrowed' belt.
"Oh I'm sorry I just assumed you were a school friend of the girls." Said, what I could assume to be, an embarrassed Fluttershy. "Damn," I thought, "My Dad was right my stature could get me carded at a library for a Dr. Seuss book. "Nope its been awhile since I've been to school." I laughed. After some small talk, fixing the door, and an epic battle between me and a small herd of cows, and a ferret, for some reason, we were back in Fluttershy's cottage drinking tea, though I'd prefer some coffee, and scolding the girls. "..And that's why you shouldn't milk a bull." Finished Fluttershy, "Ohhhhhhhh."
Came the fillies' reply. "Well girls I'd say it's about time to go home, it's getting late." Said Fluttershy, putting down her cup. "Awwwwwww come on!" Said Scootaloo "Yeah we just got here!" Said Sweetie Belle. I was then expecting Applebloom to respond but found her konked out on the couch in a little ball. "Huh," I thought, "Hard to imagine she's a serious pain in the ass when she's asleep." "You know what you two it is getting late, how about we get going home? And before you argue I'll show you how to get that scooter of yours to move even faster if we get a move on." I smiled widely. "Really?!" Said a hyped Scootaloo, "Even faster than Rainbow Dash?!" "...What? Is that like another brand of scooter or something?" I replied definitely looking more clueless than usual. "You never heard of Dash?!" The two fillies exclaimed. "Wait!" said Sweetie Belle apparently getting an idea, "We could bring Dash over to Applebloom's tomorrow so we can really test out how fast it can go!" "Perfect!" A high hooving Scootaloo said. "Cool" I said just wanting to get back before AJ started worrying about her sister, and MAYBE getting a cig or two in with some food...Hell maybe some apple flavored liquor or hooch...Huh what would a drunk horse look like anyway? Well as long as their not like that drunk camel back in Delaram I should be good. "Well girls, V, have a safe trip back." Waved a smiling Fluttershy, "And thanks for fixing the chicken coop!" "No prob Fluttershy!" I said as I loaded Applebloom into the cart and then realized what kind of ride I was about to experience AGAIN. "Oh fucking ass tits." I said as I gripped the cart, Scootaloo once again hauled Kenyan rivaling speed down the road.

WOOOW ITS BEEN A BIT SINCE MY LAST UPDATE! BUT TRAINING IS SLOWING DOWN SO EXPECT MORE UPDATES. HOPE YALL ARE ENJOYING THIS CUZ I KNOW I AM :D IF NOT LEMME KNOW HOW TO BETTER MYSELF! OH AND I TOPPED 200 VIEWS AND THIS IS THE LONGEST CHAPTER TO DATE! READ REVIEW AND FOLLOW!