The Sixth Year: Chapter Seven
Despite Gin's earlier rude and drunken behavior, she surprises Claire and Gretchen by delivering them to a well prepared bungalow perched near the base of the temple. The small structure is quaint, but private, and is made of the same wood as the trees of the forest. It is scented by some flower that Gretchen cannot place, bouquets of which have been delicately arranged in ornamental vases, scattered about the room. And, best of all, a steaming, hot tub has been made ready. Gretchen's eyes fall upon it with lustful abandon.
With Hiro still standing beside her, Gin bows to the two girls and bids them farewell. Then she and Hiro leave them for the night, shutting the double-framed doors behind them.
Claire smiles at her girlfriend, seeing the excitement on her face.
"You can have it first," she tells Gretchen, prodding her forward gently. "Go ahead."
"Really?" asks Gretchen. "You don't mind?"
"Really," promises Claire, giving her another push. "I can wait."
Gretchen grins from ear to ear and begins tearing off her clothing with gleeful abandon. Claire looks away, blushing.
"What's wrong?" Gretchen laughs, taking off the last article. "Don't you want to ..."
Looking up, she sees that Claire is not only blushing, but frowning as well. Gretchen stops mid-sentence and steps carefully into the tub, watching Claire closely.
"Are you all right, Claire?" she asks, once settled into the water.
"Yeah, I'm ... fine," replies Claire, still turned away. "I just ... didn't think I should ... I mean ..."
"I don't mind if you look at me," says Gretchen, speaking softly. "If that's what you're worried about. I mean, if you're thinking about what happened ... you shouldn't."
"How can I not?" Claire asks, her voice cracking a little on the words. "How can you not?"
Gretchen pauses, biting down on her bottom lip. "Elle wasn't there, Claire," she finally says, "not for me, anyway. Not in my mind."
Claire takes a deep breath and finally turns around. "But she was there, Gretchen. I can never forget that. I can never forget what she made me do ... I can never forgive myself for it either."
Gretchen starts to stand up out of instinct, to go to Claire and comfort her, but thinks better of it when Claire's eyes dart away again. She sinks back into the tub and sighs, trying to think of what to say to make this better.
"Claire," she finally says after a long pause, "come here. Please?"
Claire's eyes grow wide with surprise, but she inches closer anyway, making sure to avoid looking anywhere lower than Gretchen's own eyes. Gretchen reaches out her hand and takes Claire's, and the warmth of it spreads up Claire's arm reassuringly, relaxing her into near submission.
"Get in the tub with me," Gretchen pleads, her voice soft and low.
"No," replies Claire immediately, laughing nervously. "I can't."
"Yes, you can," insists Gretchen, keeping her voice calm. "We don't have to do anything. Just ... get in. Trust me, Claire. Don't you trust me?"
"Of course I trust you, Gretch," Claire promises. "I just ..."
"Get in," Gretchen says again, giving her hand a delicate pull. "Please? I promise you can trust me."
Claire pauses, then finally lets go of Gretchen's hand to pull her own shirt off. Gretchen watches, but tries not to smile.
"I'm not sure I can do this," admits Claire, standing topless and afraid. "I can still feel her watching us."
"No one is watching but me," reminds Gretchen. "And, I'm not going to hurt you. No one is ever going to hurt you again, Claire. I promise."
Claire smiles then, but it is not without lingering doubt. Nonetheless, she removes the rest of her clothing and steps into the water, still keeping her eyes firmly locked on Gretchen's.
"Okay," she says, breathing in the steam. "What now?"
"Now we take a bath," says Gretchen, reaching for the soap.
Claire reaches out and touches her arm suddenly, causing her to freeze mid-reach. "Wait," she tells Gretchen, her smile slowly warming. "Can we ... try something else first?"
Gretchen drops her hand from the soap dish and gives Claire a look of wonder. "Sure. Anything."
"Could you just ... hold me?"
"Of course," Gretchen immediately replies.
Claire turns around and snuggles into her open arms, her back pressed against Gretchen's front, and leans her head lovingly against her shoulder. In return, Gretchen wraps her arms around Claire's middle, careful not to brush against anything that might still be off limits, and kisses her forehead gently.
"Mmm ..." Claire sighs, "This is nice."
"Good," replies Gretchen. "I'm glad you're not mad at me for pulling you in here."
"You make me feel really safe," whispers Claire.
"You are safe," Gretchen promises, giving her forehead another kiss.
"Are you sure? You don't think Elle could find us here?"
"I don't think anyone could find us here," insists Gretchen.
"She really wants this baby," says Claire.
"Shh ..." soothes Gretchen, smoothing back Claire's hair. "Don't think about that. We'll figure it all out later, I promise. Just relax for now, okay? You deserve it."
Claire looks up into her eyes. "I don't deserve you, Gretchen. I really, really don't."
"Why? Because you were forced to do something you never would have done on your own? That wasn't your fault, Claire ... you have to believe that."
"It's not just that," replies Claire. "It's something Elle said ... that I was just like her."
"That's crazy," Gretchen tells her. "You are nothing like that psychopath."
"Really? You sure about that?" asks Claire. "She told me if I would bring Stephanie to her, to replace you, that she would let you go."
"But ... you didn't."
"Only because she was lying," explains Claire. "I would have, if Elle had let me. I would have done anything to save you. I would have brought her anyone."
Gretchen takes a deep breath and pauses. "And ... that's supposed to make me love you less?" she finally replies.
"Gretchen, that makes me just as evil as her," Claire tries to point out.
"No," insists Gretchen. "No, it doesn't. It makes you human, Claire. It's a little extreme, I'll admit, but ... you just wanted to protect me. I would have done the same thing for you."
"You would have?"
"In a heartbeat."
Claire smiles, then pinches Gretchen playfully in her ribs. "Oh yeah? How would you have done that? Taken down Stephanie, I mean? With your incredibly awesome forensic skills?"
"Hey!" laughs Gretchen, tickling Claire right back. "Quit teasing me! You have no idea what I'm capable of anymore, Claire Bennet! I've been through Hiro Nakamura's school of martial arts, I'll have you know ..."
"Oh yeah?" giggles Claire, now fully engaged in a tickle fight. "You think you could take me on, Berg?"
Gretchen struggles under her probing fingers, laughing and squealing while trying to find Claire's next ticklish spot. "Only one way to find out!"
With water splashing, and laughter reaching a fever pitch, Gretchen grabs both her wrists and turns her over, pinning her against the tub. In doing so, her intention had been to dig her fingers into Claire's ribs and tickle the snot out of her. But, as their eyes meet, the laughter suddenly subsides ... and the only noise in Gretchen's ears is the sound of Claire's heavy breathing.
Claire stops struggling against her immediately, and searches her eyes. "Gretchen?" she says.
"Yes?" comes a throaty response.
"Kiss me."
"Are you sure?"
In response, Claire pulls one wrist free of her grasp and grabs the back of her head, pulling her into a passionate kiss. Gretchen moans and returns the kiss, letting go of her other wrist as well, in order to gently take hold of Claire's neck as it arches backwards.
But, just as suddenly, Claire pulls away again. She takes hold of the hand at her neck, keeping it there reassuringly, and looks into Gretchen's now hungry eyes.
"Wait," she breathes out. "I can't ..."
Trying hard not to show her disappointment, Gretchen leans back a little, giving her some space. "It's okay, Claire," she promises. "I understand." And then she leans back against the tub opposite her, sinking into the water as far as possible without drowning.
Claire crosses her arms over her chest self-consciously and bites down on her bottom lip. "I am so sorry," she tells Gretchen. "I didn't mean to ..."
"Honestly, baby, it's okay," soothes Gretchen, her eyes full of empathy. "I totally get it, okay? You don't have to apologize."
Claire smiles. "Did you just call me baby?" she asks, the smile growing.
Gretchen blushes and looks away. "Did I?" says she with a shy grin. "It just kind of ... popped out. I won't do it again. I mean, if it bothers you ..."
"No," insists Claire, her voice soft and low. "No, it's ... nice. I don't mind it at all."
With Claire's green eyes staring solidly into her own, Gretchen gets lost in them for just a moment ... or two. She isn't sure how much time passes, she only knows that she is suddenly aware that time has indeed been lost. The feeling makes her uneasy enough to clear her throat and break the stare, shifting her weight nervously in the process.
"Wou ... would you like me to get dressed?" she asks Claire.
"No," she answers, eyes now downcast. "You don't have to. But ... would you mind seeing if there's anything to eat in here? I'm kind of starving."
"Sure. Anything you want, Claire," replies Gretchen, lifting herself up and out of the tub, her wet, bare feet smacking against the polished wood floor.
Claire watches her as she slides across the floors, opening one cabinet after another, searching for food. She wasn't lying about training with Hiro. Claire can see that by the way her body's been sculpted; her muscles lean and hard now, and her movements as graceful as a dancer's. And, as she watches her, the thought occurs to her that Gretchen did all this work, not to look her best as most people would, but to save Claire's life.
She probably isn't even aware how great she looks, Claire thinks to herself. The thought probably hasn't even crossed her mind.
In a moment, Gretchen finally finds the dry goods, and grabs a box of japanese crackers. In a small icebox beneath the only sink in the room, she also finds a healthy looking chunk of cheese. She places both of these on a table that sits in the center of the room, then goes back to opening cabinets again, looking for a knife.
In the meantime, Claire steps out of the water and covers herself with a towel. Unnoticed by Gretchen, she sits down at the table, which requires sitting upon a mat on the floor. She watches her girlfriend closely, following her every move with renewed fascination. She wishes so badly that she could have followed Gretchen's lead in the tub ... if only she could shake the feeling of being watched. Then, suddenly, a panic seizes her.
What if I feel like this for the rest of my life?
Having finally found a knife, Gretchen spins around to find Claire crying uncontrollably beside the table.
"Claire?" she says, rushing to her side.
Gretchen sits the knife down and kneels beside her girlfriend, who immediately leans against her for comfort.
"I'm so sorry, Gretchen," she manages to say in between her tears. "I'm ruining everything."
"What? No, you're not. What are you talking about?"
"This. Us ..." she mumbles. "We're finally together again, and ... we're finally safe. But ... I can't stop ... remembering."
Gretchen puts an arm around her and smoothes her hair back. "Do you need to talk about it?" she asks calmly. "What she did to you?"
Claire rears back at this, regarding her as if she's gone insane. "No. No ... Gretchen, I don't ever want to talk about it."
"It's okay, Claire," Gretchen insists. "Heroes need help sometimes too, you know."
"That's not why I don't want to," explains Claire. "I just ... don't want you to know what happened to me in there."
"Why?"
"Because I don't ever want you to picture what I have to picture, okay?" she replies at once, sounding almost angry.
Seeing the hurt in Gretchen's eyes, she amends her attitude, reaching out to caress her bare shoulder. "It's not what I want you to think about when you're with me," Claire tries to explain. "I want you to think about good things ... like the night we had in Cuba."
"I already do, Claire," Gretchen promises, taking hold of her hand. "It's all I've thought about for over a year. But ... that doesn't mean I'm not willing to wait longer for another night like that. I would wait a lifetime for you."
Her tears all but gone for now, Claire smiles up at her warmly and squeezes her hand. "Well," she says, "I'll try not to make you wait that long."
"Good," replies Gretchen, returning the smile. "Now ... still hungry?"
"Famished."
"Awesome, cause I can do something about that," says Gretchen.
She slides around to the other side of the table and begins slicing cheese for Claire's crackers. Each time she cuts off a new slice, she places it delicately on a cracker and gives it to Claire.
"Aren't you going to have any?" Claire asks after the first few.
"I'm not really hungry," says Gretchen, still slicing.
Claire nibbles at her cracker, but can't keep her eyes off of Gretchen. "Are you okay?" she asks after a pause. "I mean ... you seem so calm for someone who ..."
Gretchen looks up, giving Claire a patient smile. "I'm fine. Don't worry about me, okay? Eat your crackers."
"But ... how can you be so ... unaffected? You were there too. Are you sure you don't need to talk about it?"
Gretchen sighs and puts down the knife, giving Claire an almost amused grin. "I can't explain it really, but ... I'm honestly okay. Something has ... changed in me. I feel really ... peaceful, actually. And whole."
Claire tilts her head, one eyebrow arched in skepticism.
"I told you I couldn't explain it," says Gretchen, going back to slicing cheese.
"Maybe it's this forest," offers Claire, her voice soft.
Gretchen feels Claire's fingers wrap around her own and looks up, dropping the knife again. "But ... I'm not a hero," she tells Claire in response.
"Yes you are, Gretch," Claire tells her, squeezing her hand. "You're my hero."
Gretchen feels her cheeks grow hot, and looks away shyly ... the warmth in Claire's eyes making her pulse race. "Stop it, now ..." she warns Claire. "You're going to give me a big head."
Suddenly, Claire stands up, tugging on Gretchen to do the same. "Come on ... I'm exhausted, aren't you?"
Gretchen allows her to pull her up, and immediately feels her legs wobble under her own fatigue.
Finally smiling, Claire leads her to a platform bed that lies hidden behind screens in another room, and pulls back the covers. Gretchen gets in ahead of her, then watches on as Claire finally drops the towel she's been wrapped up in.
"I still don't think I can ... you know," says Claire, standing naked beside the bed.
Gretchen sees the torment behind her eyes, and almost feels her heart break in two. She reaches a hand out to Claire, her own eyes full of reassurance.
"It's all right, Claire," she tells her. "Come lay beside me. You're safe here ..."
Claire takes her hand and slides in next to her, pulling in Gretchen's arm, so that is wrapped tight around her chest. "Just ... don't be surprised if I have nightmares," she says.
Gretchen kisses her forehead softly, brushing hair from her face. "I'll chase them away," she whispers. "I promise. Just close your eyes and think of Cuba ..."
Claire closes her eyes, omits a pleasant sigh ... then slowly drifts to sleep.
Gretchen, however, stays awake for much longer ... watching over her girlfriend ... and praying that she sleeps peacefully through the night.
*to be continued ...*
