A/N: Thank you so much for your reviews. skellingtonlover, xHouseLoverx, Aching Bones, bea.tricks, Tom's gg and everyone - i am so gratful fo your thoughts and input! It is great to see whether or not I'm getting my thoughts across!
Bigger chapter as a reward!
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Booth pushed the bag with his son's towel and clothes under the bleachers with his toe, turned to face the little boy and handed him a swimmer's float.
"There you go, bud, you're all set."
"Are you going to watch me, Daddy?"
"I'll be sat right here, Parker. I can see everything from here." The boy nodded and ran to the other side of the swimming pool where several other children were waiting.
Booth settled himself onto the bleachers. It was Saturday morning and Rebecca had arranged for Parker to take swimming lessons. He had insisted, vehemently, that he was quite capable of teaching Parker himself.
Rebecca had quietly suggested it would be good for Parker to learn the basics from a professional and when Booth had interrupted again, she had firmly told him that he could accompany Parker to the outdoor pool and watch his lessons from the side. He was then free to join Parker after his lesson to undo any bad habits the instructor had taught him.
Booth had seen Rebecca's decisive face before. He knew someone else who had one very similar. He also recognized that Rebecca had an ulterior motive and he understood, resignedly, that it wasn't a selfish reason.
He knew Parker had probably told her how tired and irritable he had been recently. On top of everything that had been before – the shooting, the faked death, the conclusion of the Gormogon investigation - he'd had to cancel the last two Saturdays because of new cases. And to top it all off on the previous Sunday night, one of his nights in the month to keep Parker 'til the week day and drop him off at school, he had fallen asleep late in the afternoon as they watched cartoons. He had woken to find his son gone. He'd run around the apartment shouting until he'd found Parker stood calmly in front of the bathroom mirror brushing his teeth, readying himself for bed.
A year ago, probably less, Rebecca would have reamed him out but she knew what was going on and why he was exhausted. Not that he'd told her, but the Gormogon case had been all over the TV and papers.
He hated that nickname even more now the press had got hold of it.
As the former lead investigating officer he'd been kept out of it, but the Jeffersonian had received a lot of bad press. A killer had hidden in their midst for months, aiding and abetting a serial murderer, who they just happened to be investigating. Evidence had been compromised and there were calls for a Judicial Review into how the Institute operated. Cam's job had been on the line and it wasn't clear yet if it was safe.
So he was grateful in many ways for Rebecca's understanding. He'd have been happier if he hadn't needed it, but their friendship had gotten better in the last year and so he was willing to take it.
Parker hadn't minded a bit that his dad had spent the best part of the afternoon snoring. He also appeared more than happy to have whatever it was Booth would have cooked for him replaced by take out pizza eaten picnic style on the floor of his bedroom in a makeshift tent made of a broomstick and sheets, hastily erected in apology.
Booth hadn't forgiven himself, even though he knew why it had happened. He was exhausted, frustrated and, for all intents and purposes, demoted.
Another agent had been put on the Gormogon case, and although they were letting Booth stay involved, he was pissed. He had fought the decision hard, knowing they really had no grounds, other than compassion, to remove him from the investigation. It grated that people thought he was compromized. He had worked damn hard to ensure he remained professional when it came to his involvement with the Jeffersonian.
He had never felt more job satisfaction, more achievement and had never has such a high solve rate than since he started working with Bones and their Squints.
Of course, there were all those other reasons he loved his job too, but they weren't so professional, and so he squashed them.
Or he had, until that night a couple of weeks ago.
"Daddy, daddy!"
He heard Parker's excited yell from across the other side of the pool. He looked up and waved, shading his eyes from the sunlight reflecting off the pool with his other hand. He watched his son grab his nose, turn his gaze on the instructor who counted down from five and then the eight kids all launched themselves into the pool at the same time.
He laughed as Parker surfaced, giggling and gasping for breath. Parker grabbed for the side of the pool, and then, one arm slung onto the concrete surface, turned and looked for his father. Booth gave him two thumbs up and smiled at the grin he received in return.
Sighing, Booth leaned back against the hard bleacher and folded his arms across his chest. He grimaced at the slight pull in his right shoulder. He touched it with his finger tip and felt the edge of the wound, which was 'healing nicely' but would be there as a reminder of those few weeks for a long time to come.
He shifted and pulled his sunglasses from his jeans pocket. Slipping them on he leaned his head back and let the sun warm his face. He stretched his long legs forward and spread his arms out along the wooden slat behind him.
He had been training his mind not to keep going over the pact he had made with Bones. There was no point arguing with the woman, no point pushing her, and certainly no point rushing her. He had his declaration, her promise they would be together. He'd made it three years and change with the unuttered status quo, he'd make it some more.
Of course, he also knew that last part was bullshit, but what was a guy to do?
He had rushed her, he had pushed her, all in a moment of weakness and he felt like crap about it. Everything she, they, had been through and he had to go and do the last thing he should have done.
"Dammit, such a jakass" he said, and lifted his head from where it rested on the warm wood. So much for not letting his mind keep going over it.
He wasn't a jackass; he was just in love and angry at the same time. Not usually the way love was meant to go, but he wasn't in love with the usual type of woman. And it wasn't like he was following his usual M.O. He didn't usually shove his tongue in women's mouths when they were at their most vulnerable.
He shouldn't have done it, not then, not after what they had just been through.
When they first entered Zack's hospital room he had barely been able to watch Brennan reason with the boy he had recently started to think of as a man. He had wanted to inflict serious physical harm on him when he started talking and trying to justify, in his usual logical style, something that was just beyond a usual human being's comprehension.
This wasn't the same. This was murder.
But then, as he watched Bones' heart break again, he folded. He decided, in the seconds it took for her to embrace Zack and cry into his hair, that he would fight for her friend.
That decision had been made harder as he didn't buy any of this 'Iraq changed him' bullshit Cam and Angela were throwing around, and more irritatingly, at him.
He didn't care; He was the only one who knew what combat was like, none of them had ever been to war.
He shifted, and crossed his legs at the ankle, eyes finding Parker under a haze of splashing. He was pushing a float in from of him and kicking wildly. He could see the instructor hiding a laugh as he patiently explained from the water's edge how it was best to try to make as little splash as possible. He saw Parker nod and kick off the bottom again. The amount of spray was negligibly less.
"I do care," he whispered to no one in particular.
He acknowledged weeks ago that he felt guilt over his lack of involvement with Zack. He had sidelined the kid early on, because he didn't have a clue how to interact with someone like that. And of course, he had come to realize that was an excuse. He had learned how to interact and understand Bones, and she and Zack had so much in common.
He understood her better than he ever would have considered possible when they first met. He knew Bones had seen things and that things had been done to her that she hadn't told him about. Perhaps she never would, but he knew there were things in his past, that no matter what, he would never share with anyone.
He also knew everything was changing and there was nothing he could do to stop it.
And yet so much of their lives seemed to be on repeat.
Maybe that was why he had kissed her. To break the damn cycle.
He could hear Parker's high pitched giggle amongst the other children's floating from across the pool. He closed his eyes and listened to the sound, and it calmed him.
"Better than any 12 step plan to put things in perspective, Hodgins."
He remembered; he had been back to see Zack just once. To ensure he would take the deal, plead guilty and make certain that that he knew the choice was in his hands. He also wasn't above telling Zack in no uncertain terms just what impact his actions were having on his friends.
However, Zack hadn't needed persuading and had been clear.
He would plead guilty, because he was.
He would co-operate, because he had to.
But, apparently he did not see the benefit in being secured at a facility that wasn't designed to treat those who had committed the kind of crimes he had. He was fully aware of the choices he had made and he now saw the error in his logic. He said that although he had acted on the best evidence he had at his disposal, he was adamant he would not be seeking a lighter sentence. Zack felt he deserved the punishment that would be meted out by the system and to do anything else would be a further disservice to those whose lives he had taken, and those still affected.
Booth had punched a hole in the wall of a featureless hospital corridor.
He had stormed out angrier than he could remember being in a very long time. He had gone straight to Sweets to confirm what they had spoken about in that same hallway. He had informed him in no uncertain terms that Sweets had to ensure Zack took Caroline's deal.
They had argued long and hard about the consequences Zack would face if he was found to be compos mentis. A man like him wouldn't survive in prison, not for a day.
The boy-shrink, following plenty of veiled and not so veiled threats, had finally agreed. Sweets spent hours at the hospital, talking him into taking the deal Caroline had wrought.
But in the end it turned out their effort was irrelevant.
Booth, again, shifted on the wood. He hadn't slept well the night before, or the night before that either. He hadn't slept well for weeks.
He thought back to the last conversation he had had with Sweets before the hearing and how it had ended on a different topic to usual. Booth, for once, actually wanted to bring something up.
"Oh...one more thing." Booth had turned back from the door and stalked right up to Sweets, placing a finger on the boy's chest and pushing hard. "If I ever hear you suggesting to Bones again that I am trying to seduce her, I will do things to you that the worst depraved mind that you've ever studied and think you understand would never dream up."
Sweets had turned white and nodded. No smart, sharp come back or observation this time.
Booth had left.
It made his blood boil to think anyone would expect him to treat her so disrespectfully; He would never have seduced Bones and Sweets damn well knew it. She wasn't the kind of woman you schmoozed with wines and roses. She didn't appreciate doors being opened or insisting that you always paid the check. And she certainly wasn't the kind of woman you grabbed and stuck your tongue in her mouth.
"Dammit," he muttered.
She loved him, he loved her, that was out there in the open now and nothing was going to put that heap of worms back in the can until she learned whatever it was she needed to learn and ended this agreement. He knew it had to be her choice. And so here he was, two and a half weeks on: stymied, belligerent and horny. And none of those three were going to lend themselves to a great working environment for very much longer. He needed to get some of his ground back, redress the balance that had seen her setting all the guidelines instead of him.
A shadow fell across his face and he looked up. A woman was stood with her back to him. In a bikini. A very small bikini. Booth's eyes ran up her slim calves, across the scrap of pink material that barely covered her butt, and up her back.
He watched for a moment more and realized she was watching the same group of children Parker was in. Looking across the pool he saw another boy smile broadly, and he watched her wave back. She was stunning, and so far only view was from behind. She had long, blonde hair, and from this angle she reminded him strongly of that cut-throat bitch Tessa. And as the image of an ex flittered across his mind, something inside sparked. And something deeper inside snapped.
Booth grinned broadly, and laced his fingers together, raising them up and then behind his head. For the first time in weeks, his melancholy began to lift. Something had come to mind, something that he needed to think through a bit more carefully first.
Booth stood and walked past the woman, without so much as a sideways glance; the forty five minutes of lesson were almost up. He caught Parker's eye and indicated he was heading into the locker room to change.
He saw his own broad smile reflected back at him. The excited eyes of his son matched the blooming excitement in his chest as he planned a way to safely bring this Pact to an end.
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A/N: A peek inside Booth's head for you all! Clickity click click ;)
