STARTING SONG: "White Trash Circus" by Motley Crue

No filler!

CHAPTER SEVEN

I yawn widely. "Jeez, it's been two weeks," I complain. "Isn't it time for them to drop this stupid news story?"

"Well, nothing else is going on, so..." Mr. Izumi says. "Just be patient. You're not going to be stuck here forever."

"Here's hoping," I mutter, then stand up. "I'm gonna go play outside," I say, heading for the door.


I wander to a nearby park and take a seat on a bench. It's Sunday, so there are kids everywhere, but none of them pay attention to me, so I pull the ancient Game Boy Konata-neesan gave me out of my pocket and start playing.

This stinks. I want to go home. It's nice that I don't have to drag Suzaku around everywhere in order to avoid getting beat-up, but I'd still rather be with my sister.

"Huh? Hey, it's Izumi! Hey! Izumi!"

I start and turn around. Three boys from my class are headed in my direction: Michiru Tanaka (birthday September 4, single-parent household, no siblings, father is a salaryman, mother is deceased), Hiro Akimoko (birthday October 19, one older sister, single-parent household, father is a sales clerk, mother is a fashion designer), and Souta Yamashita (birthday January 1, no siblings, lives with grandparents, parents are deceased). "What are you doing here, Izumi?" Yamashita asks.

"Nothing," I answer. "I was just taking a walk."

"We're goin' to the arcade!" Tanaka says. "Wanna come?"

"Not really."

"Ah, c'mon!" Akimoto says, grabbing my arm and pulling me off the bench. "You need to spend time with other people more!"

"But I don't want to! Let me gooo!"


The do not let me gooo, instead they successfully drag me to the nearby arcade. I sigh, resigned to my fate.

"I'm sorry about this, Izumi-san," Yamashita says, smiling apologetically. "Michiru and Hiro can get a little pushy sometimes."

"It's fine," I say, rubbing my shoulder. It seems that in his excitement, Tanaka nearly yanked my arm out. "But why do you hang out with them?" I ask. Tanaka and Akimoto had run off as soon as we arrived, leaving Yamashita and I alone. "You're... Sane."

Yamashita laughs a little. "Thanks, I think," he says, then smiles. "We've been friends since kindergarten. Besides, if I wasn't around to keep them in line from time to time, just think of what sort of trouble they'd get into!"

"I'd rather not."

"Heeey!" Tanaka called. I looked up. He was standing next to a fighting game console, waving his hand. "What are you doing? Get over here already!"

Yamashita and I exchange a glance. He smiles and shrugs. I roll my eyes and head over to Tanaka. "Gimme some money," he demands.

"I don't have any."

"What?" Tanaka snaps. "Why not?"

"Because I don't. Mi- My uncle doesn't give me an allowance."

"Ch. You suck," Tanaka says. "Hey, Souta, give me some money."

"Didn't you just get your allowance yesterday?" Yamashita asks sternly. "You need to learn to save money."

"Don't lecture me! Just gimme some money!"

I ignore them and wander over to watch a couple of teenagers playing DDR. I have absolutely no interest in the game, but I want Tanaka and Akimoto to think I am, so they'll leave me alone.

No such luck. "Hey! Izumi!"

I sigh and head back towards the others. "What?" I ask.

"Here!" Tanaka said, shoving a few coins into my hands. "Now pick a game! I guarantee you that whatever it is, I'll totally own you!"

"How 'bout that one?" I ask, pointing to a quiz game.

"Any game but that one."

"But you gave me a guarantee."

"Not for that one! Pick a game! Not a learning tool!"

"Sheesh. Fine."


After soundly defeating Tanaka in every game but DDR, we leave the arcade. It's gotten dark by then, so the others leave quickly, in hopes of not getting in trouble with their respective parents and legal guardians for being out late. I, however, have no such concerns, and don't feel like returning to the Izumi's yet, so I take a little walk around town.

I'm passing by an electronics store when a news report on one of the TVs in the window catches my eye. I turn to watch. Once the report is finished, I turn and run back to the Izumi's house.

This is not good.


"Oh, hey Shou-chan. You're la-" Konata-neesan starts to say as I run into the house.

"Did you watch the news?" I demand.

"Hm? No, I was playing a game."

"What about the others? Did they watch the news?"

"I don't know. What's the matter?"

Ignoring her, I turn and run into the living room. Mr. Izumi and Yutaka-neechan are watching a movie. "How far in is this?" I demand.

"It's almost over," Mr. Izumi answers. "Why? Did you want to watch it?"

"How long is the movie?"

"What's wrong Shou-chan?" Yutaka-neechan asks, frowning.

"He's freaking out about something on the news," Konata-neesan says, walking up behind me.

"What happened?" Mr. Izumi asks, pausing the movie.

I pause to catch my breath before answering. "The pathologist who examined the boy they said was me," I say, "came on TV and admitted that he was told to lie."

"That's great!" Yutaka-neechan says. "That means you can go home, right?"

"No, it means I might never get to go home!" I snap. "Think about it! Who would tell a doctor to lie, that that doctor would listen to? He said he wasn't paid off; just ordered, meaning it's probably either a politician, or someone from the military, and I encounter people from both groups all the time where I live!"

"Wait, so..." Konata-neesan says. "Are you suggesting that there's a government conspiracy to kill you? Which means that even if you go home, you'll probably end up getting murdered."

"Exactly!"

The Izumi's don't say anything for a while; just sit and stare at me. I start crying, completely frustrated. "I'm not lying, and I'm not being paranoid!" I insist. "I-"

Mr. Izumi hold his hand up. "None of us were thinking that," he says. "We'll figure something out. Just calm down."

"Telling my to calm down won't calm me down!" I scream.

Mr. Izumi sighs, walks over, and puts his hands on my shoulders. "Relax," he says. "Whoever tried to kill you has probably been looking for you this entire time. They haven't found you yet, so you should be safe here while we figure something out. Okay."

"Okay," I say, wiping my eyes.

"Good boy."


Everyone who reads this far recieves a box set of Ah! My Goddess! on DVD.

ENDING SONG: none