Chapter 7: What's Wrong With Your Nose.
"Aren't you gonna be late for school, Sir?" Alfred asked as he entered Bruce's room.
"I'm finishing up my guest article for the school paper." Bruce answred.
"I was unaware that was a thing. What are you writing about?"
"The Clitoris."
Alfred's eyes widened. "I beg your pardon sir, but isn't that a female thing?"
"Yea, but it's homologous with a male penis."
"Is this appropriate for school?" Alfred asked with a heavy sigh.
"It's 2018, Alfred. We have guys pretending to be girls and girls pretending to be guys. Donald Trump is the president. And in 2020 Oprah Winfrey and Kanye West are going to run against him. Anything goes nowadays."
"I see." Alfred said. "Very well sir."
Bruce showed Vicki his article. When she was done reading it, she shook her head as she set his article down. "I'm speechless." She said with a big smile. "You've broken new ground here Brucie! This is professional stuff! We are gonna drag this stinky school paper right into 2018! Where do you get your ideas?"
"I've just been thinking a lot about this kind of stuff." He replied while thinking of Selina's perfect naked body. And how long it had been since he'd even gotten to see it.
"We're gonna make history here!" Vicki squelled excitedly
The next day, Bruce and Vicki were forced to pick up the trash in the courtyard as punishment for their inappropriate article. Bruce made the most of it and used this time to practice his penetration steps as he knee walked along the lawn picking up trash.
"What an infringement of the first amendment!" Vicki groaned. "First thing they do is shut down the press and imprison the intellectuals." She turned to Bruce. "I loved your piece on the clitoris. I showed it to my Mother!"
After practice, Bruce sat down with Ollie and Clark in the gym. They were just taking a breather and catching up. "Hey, what do you know about the clitoris?" Bruce asked. "Clark i know you don't know shit, but what about you Ollie?"
"I don't know what it looks like, exactly." He answrred. "But i know it's roughly about an inch above the hole i stick my dick in." He sat down in front of Bruce and held out his arm. "If you ain't strong enough to beat me, you ain't strong enough for Slade." Bruce took his arm and began arm wrestling with him.
"What do you think would happen if i called up Slade." Bruce groaned. "Rolled out a mat right now and wrestled him here. I'm not sure how much longer i can keep this shit up."
"You're almost there." Ollie groaned back. "No sense in quitting now."
"You don't have to wrestle him." Clark chimed in as he watched them. "It's not written anywhere."
As Ollie began to lose to Bruce, blood started to drip onto the table from Bruce's nose. They stopped the match. Ollie took Bruce to the athletic trainer as Clark left. The trainer got a bag of ice, had Bruce tilt his head back, and put the bag of ice on the bridge of his nose.
"I'm low on Iron." Bruce sighed.
"Is this the first time it's happened?" The trainer asked.
"Yeah." Bruce answered.
"Well do me a favor, walk home like a normal person." He requested.
Ollie gave Bruce a ride home on his bike. "I need this now, man. First i faint and now i can't hold my blood." Bruce groaned.
"You think you'll tell coach?" Ollie asked.
"No. And if you tell him, i swear to god i'll kill you man." Bruce replied.
"I wouldn't tell coach shit about this. You think i'd tell him something like that? I won't tell him nothing."
Ollie was at a stoplight. Bruce's eyes wandered to a sight he couldn't believe. As Ollie went forward, Bruce got off, and walked over to the window of the restaurant that caught his attention. "Hey man!" Ollie yelped as immediately stopped and looked over.
Bruce looked inside the window and saw Selina having diner with Clark. He felt betrayed, and heart broken. Stabbed in the heart by Brutus and Calpurnia.
"She's fucking you over, man!" Ollie gasped. "And with your best friend!"
Bruce had half a mind to go in their and beat Clark to death. And say unspeakable things to Selina. But he bottled his anger up and took off running try to work off his rage. "Those two can burn in hell together!"
The next morning he refused to even look at either of them. Selina walked into Bruce at the house. "Morning?" She said with a smile. Bruce walked right past her. "Bruce?" She was shocked he didn't even look at her. He always greeted her with a kind smile, warm hug, and a tender kiss. She knew something was terribly wrong.
At school Bruce and Clark passed each other in the hallway. "Hey, Bruce." Clark greeted him. "How ya.." Bruce hit his shoulder hard into Clark's chest. Clark was shocked Bruce just did that to him. "What was that about?"
Bruce got home after practice to find Selina sitting on his bed. Her arms and legs crossed, and a cold frown on her face. Bruce turned his back to her and took off his sauna suit.
"So, you're just gonna stop talking to me for no reason?" She asked, pissed off.
"What do you care if i do or not?" He coldly replied.
"Wait, a minute. I think i missed something somewhere." Selina glared at him. "I heard you fainted, i was worried about you like a girlfriend is supposed to be about her boyfriend, we had kind of a nice conversation about it, and now you're avoiding me like i'm some kind of intrusion on you."
"You heard i fainted!?" Bruce shrieked. Selina felt a little worried about his tone. "Or did Clark tell you?" He asked more calmly. "Yea, he told you everything. He told you everything i said."
"Is that what this is about? You thought i..." Selina couldn't believe Bruce thought she betrayed him. "Hey instead of assuming shit, maybe you should talk to me. That's what couples do, talk! And all we did was talk about you. He's your best friend and i'm your girlfriend. And we came together to discuss what's wrong with our favorite person. He talked about how sensitive you can be..."
"Sure he did." Bruce growled as he removed his shirt.
"...Even though all i see is you acting like a total dickhead." Selina finished her sentence.
"Look, unless you wanna see more than what you bargained for, you better take off."
"All i want is for you to act like the guy who i couldn't get enough of. Before all of this, Slade nonsense."
"Bullshit! You've had enough of that guy and haven't even touched him in over a week."
Selina clinched her fist. "Oh, well excuse me if i'm not horny when it's my time of the month! You know, i'm not just a hole for your cock! What the hell do you want from me?"
"Why don't you fuck me instead of my friends!" He growled as he threw her on the bed.
"Hey, get off me!" She yelled. "Get off!" She squirmed away and looked at him in horror. Bruce was tending to his nose, as it began bleeding again. "You son of a bitch." She slapped him hard. "Don't you ever try that again! I choose who i wanna be with. And so far, it's only been you. Now, maybe this is all a mix of your weight cut and some left over damage from that Talia bitch, but this ain't gonna fly. I won't ever stay with some kid jock who thinks his stiff cock is the height of romance."
Bruce looked at her and shook his head as he help his shirt up to his bloody nose.
She saw his nose and couldn't help but feel worried. He was still her boyfriend, more of less. "What's wrong with your nose?" She asked.
"It's nothing. Just low on iron." He answered.
"Yea, you oughta eat more spinach." She said as she walked off and began to tear up.
"Selina!" He called out. "I'm sorry, okay!"
