Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters or The Mortal Instruments/ Infernal Devices series.

Author's Note: I intend to revise some of the previous chapters (considerably) over the next few weeks so please forgive any inconsistencies that arise between them while they are under construction, hopefully I can improve them and make them good since it has been a few years since I started this story :D . Also, lots of thanks to everyone reading this I really, really appreciate it x


It hurt to look at him. This was a different man from the one he knew, the one who used to make him laugh, feel important and even special.

Alec had never really thought about the idea of love at first sight. Soppy fantasies had never really been his 'thing' but subconsciously he had imagined his first meeting with Magnus Bane to have been a special event. There he had stood, that flashy, outrageous warlock saying 'Call me' to him, of all people, the reserved, cagey Shadowhunter. Magnus had hardly known anything about Alec and yet he showed an interest in him. In a way, Alec had half dreamed that there was a connection between them that was sparked in that moment. A love that could, somehow, just maybe, defy time.

But now he had to face the truth. There was no special link between people. No silver thread of fate that sewed hearts together. Suddenly an idea he hardly knew he believed in had been crushed at his feet. Maybe his relationship had just been founded on desire and animal attraction and didn't really go any deeper. 'Otherwise, wouldn't there be something between us? Wouldn't he see something in me, something to love, like he will in the future?' thought Alec. He didn't want to be a joke the way Magnus was making him out to be. He didn't want to be seen as some weird Shadowhunter that had showed up on the street and behaved like a love-struck puppy, with a love that was unrequited. He refused to be that man.

He put a hand up to touch his face. His throat was burning whilst silent tears manifested themselves on his cheeks. His anger lingered, if anything he was angry at himself for being so pathetic. Turning away from Magnus he walked back in to the house as quickly as possible. The world was like a blur. He thought he heard someone shout his name but he refused to look back. He found himself out on the street and decided to keep on walking. Where? He had no idea.


"You've lost him? You've lost my brother?"

Magnus leaned forward on the chair, resting his chin in his hand. "That is one way of putting it."

Jace stared at him, waiting for Magnus to say more but he didn't. "That's just great. What on earth did you say to him? He's pretty delicate at the moment."

"I- I…" Magnus's forehead creased as he tried to think of a way to explain his actions without being offensive. He couldn't. "He doesn't look like he's your brother."

"Listen, Bane. Don't change the subject. This whole mess is your fault."

"HOW? How is any of this my fault? I am doing you a favour, Nephilim, and don't you forget that. If the Lightwoods and the Clave knew about all the strange events surrounding your arrival they would not treat you as kindly as I." Magnus's eyes seemed to burn as he stood up and glared over Jace.

"Don't give me that crap." Jace jumped up, meeting Magnus's gaze with as much force as he could muster. "You're not helping us out of the goodness of your heart, Downworlder. The Clave will be just as suspicious of you considering your name is quite literally written all over it. It's in your best interest to keep us locked up here until you can find a way to wash your hands of us."

"I don't know how you got my signature but don't you dare pull me in to your trouble, whatever that may be."
"There we go, there it is," Jace snapped his fingers in the air, "the real reason behind your 'kindness'- self-protection. Well, if you'll excuse me, I've had quite enough of your hospitality." He made to leave the room but found himself trapped whilst the air in front of him rippled with blue sparks.

"I've also grown tired of your games," Magnus said, quietly. "I've tried to be polite. I've tried to be patient. But I really do need an answer now. Who are you really and where have you come from?"


The weather was still horrible. There was slush on the streets and the wind was bitingly chilly. Alec shivered but kept on walking. For hours he had been forcing one foot in front of the other as if somehow he could walk to the 21st century. A man could dream.

He looked down at himself as he walked. It was strange how wearing such different clothes made him feel so strange as if he was the one who was different, not Magnus at all. Every time he caught a glimpse of his reflection in a shop window he had to remind himself that it wasn't a stranger. Everything felt like a dream.

The blue brooch on his lapel was the thing that annoyed him the most. It was the item that was the least like anything he would ever dream of wearing and it brought back painful memories of Magnus's rejection. "The blue brooch really brings out your eyes" Magnus had said. Is that all I am? A pair of eyes.

Viciously he grabbed at the brooch and tore it from his jacket. He let it fall from his hands and clutter on to the ground.

It was a few minutes before he noticed the tugging of small hands on the back of his jacket. Surprised he turned around to see a small boy standing there, clutching at the brooch.

"Sir, you dropped this," he said quietly, looking up at Alec through a wild mop of dark hair. He was covered in grime and painfully thin.

Alec didn't know what to say.

The world gradually came in to focus again. None of this is a dream. It was all painfully real. There were horse-drawn carriages moving down cobbled streets, men shouting at each other through windows and women tugging along small children. There were noises and smells all around him that he had never experienced before in his life. Being in the London Institute had been one thing and noticing the changes in Magnus another, but he had not yet recognised the wider world of the Victorian era beyond the small confines of bedrooms and drawing rooms, until now that is.

He looked down at the boy and spoke softly, "How old are you?"

The boy crooked his head slightly, "Around 10, sir. But, you dropped this," he held it up even higher, not knowing if Alec had heard him before.

Alec's heart missed a beat at the memory of Max, another small boy. So vulnerable. "Why didn't you just take it?"

"Mama said stealin's wrong," the boy said. He glanced at the brooch wistfully for a moment and then his eyes shifted left and right. "Besides there are too many coppers around 'ere, sir. Not worth the trouble," a cheeky grin spread across his face.

Alec couldn't help but smile back, "Well, it's not stealing if you find it on the street, is it?"

"You don't want it? I saw you drop it, sir. And a thing like this must be worth an awful lot!"

"No. I don't want it. Please, keep it." Alec bent down and looked straight in to the boys grey eyes and touched his hand lightly, pushing the boys fingers closed around the brooch.

'Thank you," the boy said. In a flash the boy was gone, lost in a maze of alleyways and street corners.

Straightening himself up Alec glanced back at his reflection in a nearby window and finally he saw himselfthere. The clothes and everything around him were strange and different but for once he didn't care. He didn't need Magnus Bane to be his Magnus Bane in order to be Alec Lightwood. He could be Alec Lightwood on his own.


In The Present

Simon wasn't quite sure what to do. Magnus had been staring out the window for hours. He hadn't so much had twitched, or blinked for that matter. Well, not as far as Simon could tell.

Was it alright to poke a warlock? he wondered. The real question was whether he was willing to take the risk and considering there was nothing else to do he was growing very tempted.

Slowly he stood up and walked over to where Magnus was perched on the end of a settee. His hand was just about to tap the warlock's shoulder when Magnus said, "Touch me and you die."

"I'm sure that's illegal," Simon replied taking a few steps backwards.

"Stopped you though, didn't it?"

"True," Simon admitted.

"I still don't get why you're still here," Magnus muttered as he turned his gaze back to the window.

"Because I'm snowed in here, I don't how many times I have to explain this to you! It's not a personal choice you know."

"Now you're just being offensive on purpose. Who wouldn't choose to stay here? Doesn't know what he's talking about, does he Chairman Meow?" The small tabby purred under his touch.

Before long there was silence again.

It was awkward.

"So," Simon began again. "Does this help you get Jace and Alec back from Victoriansville?"

Magnus turned his head back to Simon, "And how, may I ask, would staring out of the window achieve that?"

"I don't know, you're the one doing it." Simon crossed his arms defensively, "I thought you might be prepping yourself in order to use some Jedi mind tricks or something."

Magnus arched a slender eyebrow.

"That was a joke, by the way," Simon added.

"Well the answer is no. I just enjoy looking wistfully out of the window, is there something wrong with that?"
"No."

"Good," Magnus murmured. Losing himself watching the flurry of snow drift passed his window was all he could do to distract himself.

If only he could stop thinking. Because the only solution his mind could come up with was just… impossible. And ridiculous, let alone dangerous. But what about Alec? What kind of danger s could Alec be facing lost in a time so different from his own. And what if he finds me and… doesn't like me. Would not liking who I was stop him loving who I am today? He's so fracturable…

I must find him.