Castle sighed as he walked back into the room. "Well that didn't end exactly the way I expected." He sank into a chair, disappointment etched all over his face.

Alexis felt a little guilty. She hadn't exactly meant to drive Kate away, but she hadn't exactly been upset that she was leaving either. "Sorry," she murmured, her voice so low that it was barely audible.

"Oh, it's not your fault, sweetie."

This only made her feel worse, because she knew that it probably was. "Let's finish decorating," she suggested, just wanting it all to go away. All the drama, all the jealousy, everything that wasn't a normal part of the holiday season. She just wanted to have Christmas, just like every other year. So she'd been away for awhile. It didn't mean that everything had to change.

"You know, I'm not in a very holly jolly mood right now. You can keep going if you want, but I'm gonna take a break." He got up with some effort. "I'll be in my office."

Alexis nodded, and watched as her father disappeared down the hallway, taking all of her Christmas spirit with him. She guessed she'd have to finish sorting the ornaments by herself.

"We're on the island of misfit toys, here we don't want to stay," the TV sang. She knew just how they felt. And she shouldn't have had to feel like a misfit in her own house.


Rick's lack of Christmas spirit didn't last long. This time of year, it never did. Within an hour he came back out to finish hanging the lights on the tree, this time with Alexis holding the ladder steady like she had every other year.

"So, you want to tell me what was going on earlier?" he asked from his perch.

Alexis frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know, you tell me. I know Beckett didn't leave because she had things to do. I must've missed something."

She concentrated fully on the ladder. She certainly wasn't going to attempt to explain why she'd been so upset that Kate had miss-sorted a few ornaments. "Nothing," she said, her voice close to a whisper.

"Something," he argued. "She's going to be around this year. That's okay with you, isn't it?"

Alexis bit the inside of her cheek and stared at the ladder. She wanted for it to be okay with her, but she couldn't bring herself to say that it was.

Rick frowned down at his daughter. He quickly wrapped the foot or so of lights that remained and came down. He tried to meet her eyes, but she wouldn't quite look. "Hey," he prompted. "Alexis, look at me."

She did.

"I don't get it. It's not like this is new. I've had relationships before."

She shrugged. "I know."

So what's the problem? I thought you liked Kate."

"I do." She diverted her glance to a branch of the tree and memorized the configuration of its needles. "I really do."

"Then what?"

"Nothing."

"Something!"

"It's stupid."

"Come on." He coaxed her to look at him again, gently pushing her chin in his direction with one finger, and smiled. "Think of who you're talking to."

"I just—" she sighed. "I go away to college, but then I get back and it's like…"

"Like?"

She shrugged, and felt her face heat up. "Like I don't belong here anymore."

He frowned. "Alexis, come on."

She nodded. "I know! I know it sounds ridiculous, but that's how it feels."

"Okay, come here." He pulled her in and hugged her. But it didn't have the effect he intended. Something about the closeness, the feeling of his body heat and the way he smelled toggled something in the back of her throat. She swallowed, but to no avail. The tears were coming, and there was nothing she could do to stop them.

He must've felt the moisture on his shirt, because he pulled away and looked at her, meeting her tear-filled eyes. "Hey," he said gently, "you're my daughter. No matter what happens, you're always gonna belong here. Okay? Even if you graduate college, move to a foreign country, get married, have twelve kids and don't talk to me for twenty years. You can always come home."

Alexis saw the glint of a tear starting to form in his eye, and looked down guiltily. "What if while I'm gone, you get married and have twelve kids?"

"Doesn't matter. You'll always be my first daughter, and you'll always be special."

"What if—" she started, but this time he didn't let her finish.

"It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what you're gonna say. You will always belong. You will always be my daughter. And you can always come home."

She leaned into her father's chest and took a long, deep breath, trying to collect herself. He let his hand rest on her back. She felt like she was five again. She knew she was being immature. She knew that everything wasn't going to stay the same all the time, and that it probably shouldn't. But she couldn't help but think that if one thing in the world should remain constant, it was Christmas. Holidays were about tradition, and they were about family.

"I do want you to be happy," she finally said, pulling away.

He nodded. "I know."

"And I can tell that she makes you happy."

"She does."

"But do you think we could keep some things just between us?"

"Yeah. I'm sure we will. I didn't intend for everything to change."

"But… it doesn't really matter if you intend it, does it? Things are going to change."

He smiled a little sadly. "Yeah, they are. It's a part of life. But sometimes change can be good."

She nodded. "I really do like Kate."

His smile widened. "I'm glad you do. Think you can help me make her feel welcome?"

"I'll try."

He seemed to accept this. "Good." He took a few steps away from the tree to admire the lights. "How's it look? Even?"

She stepped away as well to get a better view. "Looks good to me. Time for the ornaments?"

"I think so. Are they ready?"

She nodded.

"Should we put up our every year decorations first?" Traditionally, Rick and Alexis had gone through the decorations they'd chosen each year in order, one by one, and found places around the loft for them before putting the ornaments on the tree. There wasn't really a reason that these decorations had to come first; it was just the way they'd always done it.

But although she was a fan of tradition, Alexis shook her head. "No. We'll do the tree first. Kate found the decoration this year, she should be here when we put it up. And she'd probably like to see the other ones too, don't you think?"

Rick beamed and squeezed his daughter's shoulder impulsively. "I think she'd love that, sweetie. Thank you."

"Do you think she'll want to come back here?"

He frowned. "Why wouldn't she? Did something happen between you two that I missed?"

"Not exactly… it was more of a vibe."

"Well, I don't think Kate is the kind of person to be deterred by a vibe. But I would appreciate it if you tried to keep any future vibes positive."

She nodded. "I will."

"Good. Because you two are the most important people in my life, and I need you both to be happy."

She felt a little pang as he said this. Didn't she used to be the most important person in his life? But she tried to ignore it. "I'll work on that too," she said.


A/N: Did that help? I know a lot of you were frustrated with Alexis. As was I, to be honest. I hate writing her the way she was in the last chapter, but from what I know about her, even before this season happened, I don't think it would make sense that she'd be completely open to the idea of Beckett and her dad together right away. And regardless of my own views (if you've read some of my other stories, you'll probably get that I love the idea of Kate and Alexis having a close relationship...), I want to be true to the characters first and foremost and always. That's always been my biggest goal with writing fanfiction. So I don't know if I needed to explain all that, I probably didn't, but I... wanted to. And this is my author's note and I'll do what I want. So there.

Anyway, it seems like Alexis is making some progress, which is good. So we'll see what happens from here.

In other news... there are a lot of things that I can do with words, but adequately expressing my love of reviews is not one of them. So leave me some please! And as always, thanks for reading!