The Trouble with Everything
Disclaimer: No, I don't own LWD, so sad…
Rated: M - This is for a reason. If you don't like it, don't read it.
A/N: Thank you for all the adds! Reviews are amazing, they make me happy! I am sooo sorry this took so long… it's been almost three months… *ducks from rotten fruit*
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Chapter 7
"How 'bout this one", Derek said, holding a phone up.
"No", Casey whined, "I don't like those. My friend Shannon had one of those and it would randomly go off by itself. She had to take it back."
"Oh, come on, you need a cool phone, Case", he said in a convincing tone.
She smiled evilly, "I know. And if you aren't careful, I might get that pink one over there", she said pointing, "just out of spite."
"Well, that's just not fair", he said solemnly. "Ooh! What about this one?" he suggested, "It says it's non-breakable. Which would be perfect – because you're you", he laughed.
She smacked at the back of his head and he ducked, "It would also be perfect", she said sweetly, "because then I could throw it at you and not worrying about it breaking", she smiled innocently and trotted happily to the other side of the store. He stood there for a moment, dumbstruck, before rolling his eyes and following her.
"That wasn't very nice, you know", he says standing behind her with his arms folded across his chest, feigning annoyance.
Casey turns around just enough to see him and holds back a laugh as she searches through the phone in her hand. "I'm Casey", she says in a semi-serious tone, "I'm always nice."
He lets out a laugh, "I call bullshit. You're such a liar."
"Who me?" she wonders innocently. He rolls his eyes at her, shaking his head.
"You've got forty-five minutes to find and pay for a phone", he said looking at his watch and ignoring her question. "We have to be at dinner by six, and it's four forty-five now. If you're not done by then, I'm dragging you out of here by your hair."
She raised an eyebrow at him, "Fine", she said in a deceptively sweet tone, "then I'll go get the phone I picked out online last night. It's blue", she said offhandedly.
"Wait, what? Casey!" he complained. "We've been in here for an hour!"
"So?" she wondered idly as she started walking backwards in the other direction so she could keep him in her sight.
"You already had a phone picked out", he said, advancing on her, "before we got here. What the hell were you doing skipping around the store for an hour, pretending to look at other phones?" he questioned in annoyance.
She smiled lightly, turning around to watch where she was going, "Just keeping my options open", she called over her shoulder.
He caught up to her and hooked an arm around her neck, "Do you always have to be so difficult?" he muttered in her ear.
She let out a laugh, "Only around you", she replied lightly. "Besides, you like a challenge."
He rolled his eyes, "Then I must love you", he said sarcastically. "You're just as impossible as you were the day we met."
"But you still like me better now than you did then", she stated factually.
"Eh", he shrugged noncommittally. "It could go either way."
Her jaw dropped, "Derek", she whined. When she looked up to see his face, she burst out laughing. "You are such an ass", she mumbled moving to stand in line by the counter.
"You mean 'I have such an ass'", he whispered in her ear laughing as she flushed red. "It's amazing really", he continued.
"I dislike you immensely", she complained.
They finally got up to the counter and Casey paid for her phone and they walked back to the car while she tried in vain open the damn box, as she muttered obscenities of frustration at it under her breath. "Mother-fucking -"
"Give me that", Derek said laughing at her and snatched the box out of her hand. "Calm down, you spazz; it's just a box. It didn't do anything to you."
"It should not be that hard to open", she stated viciously. They were sitting in the car, still parked in front of the store. Casey was busying glaring at the box in Derek's hands as he pried the phone out of the plastic.
Five minutes later, Derek was handing her phone to her with a smirk, "Took you long enough", she said lightly. He glowered at her, pulling the phone back. She took it from him with a giggle, "How many morons does it take to open a box?" she asked collapsing in laughter when she saw him looking at her like she was crazy.
Then he laughed, "One", he answered, "And then the awesome hot guy comes along to do it for her."
"Is that a euphemism?" she asked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk on her face to match his.
He thought for a second, eyebrows furrowed, before his eyes widened in shock, "My, my, you have a dirty mind", he teased.
She bit her bottom lip, "You're a bad influence", she said momentarily.
"I'm an awesome influence", he contradicted as he started the car. "Let's get out of here; I'm starving."
--
They got home with half an hour to spare and Casey made her way to her room with Derek behind her. She flopped down on her bed and started re-programming numbers into her phone, only managing to save Emily's numbers before Derek snatched the phone out of her hand and sat in her chair across from her. "Derek, give it back", she said sternly.
"In a minute", he said, "I wanna do something."
"Yeah, I've heard that before", she snorted. Derek raised his eyebrows but didn't look up at her as he fiddled with her phone. "What are you doing?" she asked finally.
"Finding you ringtones", he stated.
"Derek, no", she whined. "I don't trust you."
"Too bad", he said lightly, "I already have two."
"Fine", she said giving up, "but if I don't like them, you're paying for them." He just smirked at her. Five minutes later – "Derek, are you-"
"Just a sec", he said, cutting her off. She huffed impatiently, and a few seconds later, he tossed the phone onto the bed next to her. "Have fun with that", he said, and he stood up and walked out, shutting the door behind him.
He was reading – well, not reading – a car magazine when he heard her shriek a few minutes later, "DEREK!" The first ringtone he set on her phone? "Lady in Red"… And maybe he had programmed his number as a speed dial on her phone as well.
--
They were headed down the stairs a while later, answering Nora's call to dinner, and Casey had spent five minutes whining at him about, well he really wasn't sure what she had been going on about, when he said, "Seriously, Case, do you need some help dislodging the giant stick up your ass? Because, I'll tell you what", he started in a low tone in her ear, aware of Lizzie and Edwin not far behind them.
"No, Derek", Casey said, interrupting what was going to be a very suggestive comment concerning all the ways he could help her.
"And why not?" he wondered curiously.
"Period, Derek", she said calmly, stopping on the landing.
He made a face, "I didn't need to know that. But you're supposed to warn me when Queen Bitch Casey comes to visit, so I can hide."
She rolled her eyes, "Oh, please. Do you really think I like the fact that I have to tell you that?" she complained. "Besides, you of all people should be a little happy about it", she said in a serious tone, "because then you'll know there haven't been any mishaps", she finished quietly.
Casey went and took her seat at the table, and Derek made it half-way to his before he realized what she had meant and he ran upstairs, nearly plowing over Edwin and Lizzie in the process. Nora and George stared after him looking worried, "Is he alright?" Nora questioned no one in particular.
Edwin shook his head lightly, "He can't fake that shade of green. I don't think he'll be back down for dinner." He turned to Lizzie, "I can't believe she just did that", he hissed.
Casey rolled her eyes, obviously having heard them. She stood up carefully, "I'll be right back", she said quietly. Without waiting for a response, she headed back up the stairs. She went directly to the bathroom to find Derek puking over the toilet. "You okay there, Champ?" she asked leaning against the doorjamb, raising an eyebrow.
He just glared at her while he stood up and went to the sink and brushed his teeth. She rolled her eyes, not moving from her spot at the door. "It figures", she said after a moment, "you never did think about the consequences of your actions. But it's kind of a relief to know what your response would be to that particular situation", she let out a slight laugh.
He finished with the sink and moved to stand a foot or so away from her; he was mad. "My- I do not want to talk to you at all right now", he growled at her, still glaring, he brushed past her roughly and went to his room and slammed the door shut. Casey heard the lock pop into place before his radio blared. She should be worried – really – but Casey could help the laugh that passed her lips as she went back downstairs.
"Is everything alright?" Nora asked when Casey took her seat again.
Casey smirked, "Yeah, everything's fine", she said as she picked at the lasagna on her plate. Lizzie and Edwin stared at her, wide-eyed, but they didn't say anything, so she ignored them.
--
Derek wasn't talking to her. He had locked himself in his room the entire night, and had completely ignored her the next morning. She had almost resigned herself to walking to school when he dropped his keys on the counter beside her, clearing his throat and walking out the door. She grabbed her things and hauled ass out the door. She wasn't going to look a gift horse (or car ride) in the mouth. She was, however, surprised that he was actually in the passenger seat – she hadn't for a second actually thought he would let her drive. But she climbed in, throwing her things in the backseat, and started the car cautiously. They rode the whole way in a tense silence. She only broke it when she pulled into the parking lot as she stopped the car. "I'm going to Emily's after school", she said. And she tossed him the keys and made her way into the building, not bothering to check if he was behind her.
--
Emily is standing in front of her open locker, digging for her Chemistry book while she waits for her best friend and locker mate to arrive. She groans in annoyance as she pulls it from where it slipped between the dividers. "Stupid locker", she mutters to herself and tugs it free. Emily drops the book into her shoulder bag with her notebook and slams the locker shut exasperatedly. She spends the next few moments watching the upper classmen milling around the hallway before she catches sight of Casey and Derek coming down the hall and does a double-take, "Oh, no", she murmurs.
Emily has spent the past three years studying the nuances of the Derek/Casey relationship, and this spelled trouble. After Derek had given up the pretense of not knowing Casey in the first few weeks of tenth grade, they followed a clear, consistent morning pattern. Any deviation on their part meant impending disaster.
As a general rule, most school mornings began with Derek following closely behind Casey, usually whispering things in her ear that pulls a shriek out of her throat, thereby waking up the rest of the school's half-sleeping population, or poking her and just being a general pain in the ass – Derek-style – which evokes the same response. On Casey's test mornings, Derek usually entered the school as quickly as possible, trying to get out of the clutches of one very flustered step-sister, who had no doubt been panicking all morning long. It was pretty much the only time that he tried to escape her craziness – rather than being the cause of it.
But, the other times, few and far between, where they walked through the doors at the same time and were not only silent, but had at least three feet of space between them, meant that one of them had stepped over the line, and it was the beginning of the Cold War. A freeze out meant anyone in either of their paths should be extremely cautious.
Emily watched them carefully as their approach drew them closer to where she was positioned in the hall and was startled by the expressions on their faces. Derek was pissed, and Casey just looked resigned – a look that was usually reserved for when Derek talked her into doing something she didn't want to do to begin with. (This was not to be confused with all the times that Casey allowed herself to be convinced when she had wanted to in the first place.) However, it was a well-known fact to Emily, that Casey was rarely the one who had stepped over the invisible line that put Derek in such a mood. The last time that had happened, it was because Casey had agreed to go out with Truman in the beginning of the year – something that had ended just as swiftly as it had begun.
Emily side-stepped out of Casey's way so she could get into their locker and watched as it was opened carefully as usual, unlike farther down the hall where Derek's locker was thrown open with a bang. Emily shook her head, "Is it just me, or is it suddenly getting colder", she said nonchalantly.
"Well, it is supposed to snow by next week, so I suppose it-" Casey rambled with her head in the locker until Emily interrupted her.
"Casey, that's not what I was talking about", Emily said pointedly.
"Huh?" Casey muttered before situating her books and turning around. "Sorry, hi, Em", she said sheepishly. "Now, what's going on?" she questioned, shutting her locker with her shoulder and leaning on it comfortably.
Emily raised an eyebrow, "I dunno, you tell me" she said pointing down the hall. "What happened between yesterday afternoon and this morning that turned Derek into a grizzly bear? Casey, what did you do? And I suppose I should assume that whatever happened was the reason you didn't call me last night to give me your new number", she said plainly.
"Ugh, I completely forgot", she complained pressing a hand to her forehead in annoyance. She pulled her new phone out of her back pocket and dialed Emily's phone quickly and let it ring twice before hitting the 'end' button. "There", she said turning it on silent and flipping it shut. "Sorry about that", she apologized before she began babbling incoherently. "Phone shopping, Derek, ringtones, stairs, dinner… yeah", she sighed, "I pissed him off. I never know when to shut up", she hissed.
"Casey", Emily growled, "What did you say? And why don't you seem to care?"
"Em, it doesn't matter", Casey said. "And, I don't care, because I think he's just overreacting. He'll be fine once he stops acting like such a baby", she snickered. "He never has like getting reality checks", she said as she started off down the hallway.
Emily rolled her eyes and followed a few steps behind her. She took a peek over at Derek as she passed and nearly groaned aloud at his stoic expression, "This is going to suck", she complained to herself not entirely sure she wanted to spend alone time with Casey while she was being so obtuse.
--
It was after ten o'clock on Saturday night and Casey was in her room trying to shove away her frustration. It had been ten days since Derek had started ignoring her. While he had given up on avoiding her completely after three days, he still hadn't come within a foot of her and acknowledged her only when necessary in a vain attempt to keep the family from being suspicious. She groaned, "This is ridiculous", she chided herself. He hadn't touched her in over a week. That had only happened once since this thing started.
She had the same Health course he did, so she knew he had paid attention during the talk of the female reproductive system, and that he unfortunately was aware that her cycle only lasted four days. And to top it off, God help her, they were in the same Sex Ed class this semester. He sat by her purposefully and passed notes to her. She wasn't sure which was worse, the notes that had I told you so's written on them, or the ones that had suggestions on them – which were promptly shredded, of course – that made her face turn scarlet. Emily had asked her about it once, and she had managed to say that he was probably just trying to make her hyperventilate.
Casey turned away from her laptop and pulled the scrunchie out of her hair petulantly. She was above begging – usually. But, for the love of god, if he would just speak to her, she might not be going crazy right now. She went to stand in front of the full-length mirror she had bought a few months ago to replace the one that had been suspiciously broken – the jury, Edwin and Lizzie, was still out on that particular situation. She leaned closer to peer at her face critically. Her eyes looked tired and her face pale from lack of sleep. Casey made a face at herself in the mirror, "Alright, this has to stop", she commanded her reflection. "Have some self-respect", she said rolling her eyes.
If it was anyone else, this would already be a non-issue. But, no, it had to be Derek, and she really had no one to blame but herself. Because, as he frequently liked to point out, she had jumped him first. Why had she done that? Why had she picked him? Her traitorous conscience pointed out that it would have happened eventually, circumstances be damned, and that was probably true, but…
Casey shook her head to stop the whirling thoughts from taking over at the most inopportune moments and finished her self-inspection. Deciding to change into her pajamas, she rifled through her dresser drawers before finding a white spaghetti strap tank top and a pair of black satin pajama pants that had red hearts on them. She went to lock her bedroom door as a precaution and switched her clothing quickly before heading to the bathroom to complete her nighttime regimen.
When she stepped out of the bathroom fifteen minutes later, she chanced another look towards Derek's room and noticed that unlike when she first stepped into the hall, now his light was off – which meant he had heard her leave her room. Too bad for him, she was sick of this particular game of charades. With a sigh, she headed down the hall and trotted down the stairs intent on making it to the refrigerator to grab a bottle of water before playing mind games with Derek. Instead, she ran into her mother who was sitting at the island nursing what Casey assumed to be a cup of herbal tea in a black pair of pajamas.
"Going to bed?" Nora asked looking over at her eldest daughter.
Casey stretched and grabbed her water from the refrigerator door, "Yeah, that's the plan."
"Are you and Derek still fighting?" Nora asked pointedly, already knowing the answer.
"It's been quieter around here, hasn't it?" Casey said with a shrug.
"Now, I've never been one to complain about having a quiet house", Nora started, "but I don't like this, Casey. You two are too old to be acting so childish. The silent treatment has to end."
Casey let out a sigh, "I'm handling it, Mom", Casey said finally.
"Casey Lynette McDonald, ignoring it, is not handling it", Nora scolded.
Casey winced, "Ouch", she muttered at the use of her middle name.
Nora ignored her, "Where is Derek?"
"In his room fake-sleeping", Casey said rolling her eyes. "I was planning to go speak to him after I got my drink", she said holding up the water bottle for proof.
Nora sighed, "Casey what happened?" she asked tiredly.
"This one is my fault, Mom", she admitted. "I said something stupid, and he's way more upset than I thought he would be."
"How much groveling is it going to take before he forgives you?" Nora wondered.
Casey raised her eyebrows, "I'm not apologizing", she said calmly. "I shouldn't have said what I did, but it was the truth. If he's going to bury his head in the sand, he has to at least acknowledge that he's avoiding reality."
Nora closed her eyes for a moment and shook her head, "Casey, you don't always have to be right", she pointed out gently.
Casey chuckled, "This isn't about me being right. It's about him realizing that actions have consequences, whether he likes it or not."
Nora let out a breath, "I don't know what happened, and you don't have to tell me, but a word of advice? Sometimes it's better to hold your tongue and apologize… and sometimes it's better to fight it out. And whatever you end up doing, you have to decide what consequences you can live with."
"Well, fighting is something Derek and I are good at… apologizing, not so much", Casey said tiredly. She leaned over to give Nora a kiss on the cheek, "'Night, Mom, thanks. Hopefully I don't lose the 'opposite game' again", she muttered to herself.
"Sweet dreams, Casey", Nora said ignoring the last part as Casey headed towards the living room and was out of sight. Nora listened to her daughter's footsteps go up the creaky stairs and down the hall until they stopped, shuffled, then stopped again before a bedroom door was creaked open and the shut gently. No yelling, Nora thought warily. She waited a few more minutes in silence hearing not much more than cautiously moving feet and maybe some low voices before finishing her tea. She rinsed out her cup and placed it carefully into the overly-full dishwasher, turning it on before making her way downstairs to her husband, locking their bedroom door behind her.
She found her husband in his pajamas on their bed reading through a file and watched silently for a moment until he broke concentration and saw her standing in front of the closed door. He gave her a grin and promptly cleared the bed of all his work objects moving to put them on the desk. It was moments like these that made her grateful for her current life. A man who valued his family and marriage above his work was a hard find.
Her previous marriage had ended in shambles, and she had been so sure she would never have anything like that again – it hadn't all been bad. Nora had known that the baggage that comes from a divorce couldn't be understood by someone who hadn't experienced it themselves, so she had held herself away from the dating game for almost two years, allowing her heart and family to begin to heal. The few men she had dated had been nice enough, but it had never felt right, so when a friend had tried to set her up on a blind date, her answer had been an adamant 'no'. After all, if she couldn't find a decent man by herself, why would she think someone who wasn't even that close of a friend would know her better?
It had taken a week before Nora was worn down and gave in; she was thankful that she did. If she hadn't met George, she had no doubt in her mind, that she would still be single, spending more time at work than at home trying to make ends meet, and her kids would have grown up faster than they already had. Instead, she got a loving, attentive husband, three extra kids, and a crazy household that gave her a run for her money everyday – no, really, she had to hide the extra stash of money in her lingerie drawer to dole out for emergencies. And, on this note, she highly doubted that anyone in Canada ever had the same kind of 'emergencies' her family did on a regular basis.
She had a 'Mom! Derek put honey in my shampoo, again!' fund for Casey – which had been suspiciously untouched for quite some time now. There was a 'Don't do that in front of your younger siblings' fund for Derek – and sometimes Casey. A 'Will someone please clean the upstairs bathroom' fund that usually went to Edwin and Lizzie collectively – who also had a 'Yes, I know it sucks to be the middle children' fund. And Marti had an 'I need more purple' fund, and a fund for her 'Potions' when she was in her mad scientist phase and stole Casey's perfume.
It wasn't bribery – it wasn't. It was what kept their household running somewhat smoothly on a day to day basis. They had five kids between the two of them – one of which like to pretend she was a cat – who all caused their fair share of chaos, Casey and Derek, more than others. It had been a rough start, trying to blend their very different families into one unit – or at the very least, a collected front – but it had happened over time.
Nora had no misconceptions about Casey and Derek. They did make quite the pair, a strong united front usually between their siblings or respective parents – and an odd story about a school bully who Casey managed to frighten (and Nora overheard Derek yell at her later about her turning his balls into earrings – and Casey had said she could probably sell them to one of his groupies for a pretty penny on E-Bay), but Nora had long since given up on their bond having any familial aspects.
She had a husband who was actively involved in parenting – even if it had taken some ear-pulling on her part, not to mention that he was a man her daughters respected and appreciated. George had taught Lizzie to "dance", although that was a loose term, but at the very least she wasn't so shy about it anymore. He was also able to hold his own with Casey, which Nora found amusing because he hated it. He loved Casey and Lizzie to pieces but let her take care of the discipline on that front as much as possible minus the time Casey and Derek had accidentally thrown a bowl of oatmeal which landed on his head. George had grounded them while they fell on each other laughing.
George gave her a quizzical look from the bed, "What's wrong?" he asked with a sigh and Nora realized her eyes were tearing with nostalgia.
"Nothing", she said clearing her throat and smiling. She went to lie on her side of the bed and laid on her side facing him, "Our kids are idiots and I love you."
"What did Derek and Casey do this time?" he asked resigned.
"Nothing", she laughed lightly. "I yelled at Casey and told her to go talk to Derek. Our house might be loud again in the morning", she warned happily.
George rolled his eyes, "I liked the quiet."
"I know, honey", she said ruffling his hair. "Now, do we or do we not have a standing Friday 'date' night?" she prompted as she claimed a kiss.
--
A/N: Hopefully what it lacked in promptness was made up for in length… I don't want to hear any 'That's what she said' jokes. Review if you like it, and don't want to murder me for taking so long. I've already started the next one.
