Butterbeers and Brown Eyes
Waking up, a wave of excitement and nervousness hit me at the same time. Later today, I would be in Hogsmeade spending time with Fred.
I sat up and looked out the window near my bed. The weather was still awful. In the past few days, the temperature had dropped drastically and the wind had become harsh and bitter. I wasn't excited about the walk to Hogsmeade in the cold snow, so I reached down into my trunk and rummaged through my sweaters. I grabbed one of my favorites – a grey sweater that was a little oversized – and a pair of jeans and changed. Looking at myself in the mirror, I fluffed my hair around some, wishing it had more volume or texture instead of laying so flat and straight.
"Do you want to get some breakfast with Ron and Harry before we walk into Hogsmeade?" I looked at Hermione who was already dressed and holding her coat and scarf.
"Sure, give me a few more minutes," I finished getting ready and then grabbed my black coat, gloves, a scarf and a hat to wear during the walk.
Hermione and I made our way down to the Common Room to find it was mostly empty and then continued towards the Great Hall. "Are you excited?" Hermione looked at me with a sly grin. I shrugged, trying to act nonchalant, and Hermione rolled her eyes. "Have you told Ron yet?" she asked as we turned onto the main corridor that led to the Entrance Hall.
I sighed, "No… But I've gotten two more letters this past week, surely he's figured it out on his own." Granted, Ron hadn't been with us at dinner one of those times, but I wasn't trying to hide the letters away or anything. However, there was another reason I didn't particularly want to tell Harry or Ron that I'd been writing Fred and was planning on meeting him today. I was nervous that while in Hogsmeade I would decide there wasn't anything between the two of us or Fred would decide I was boring and it would be over before it began. If that was the case, telling Harry and Ron would only make things awkward in the future. I explained it to Hermione a couple of days ago and she understood what I meant, but she was confident Fred and I would have a great time today. Apparently Hermione had noticed Fred's flirting last year and had been waiting for something like this to happen for months.
I bit my lip as we walked into the Great Hall and deliberately avoided looking at the Slytherin table – something that had become an automatic habit in the past couple of months at Hogwarts. There was something else I was nervous for today, something I barely admitted to myself and therefore hadn't confided in Hermione. I was beyond nervous that I would sit across from Fred today and wish it was Draco.
"Well, it's either now or in Hogsmeade when he sees Fred then," Hermione's hushed voice broke into my thoughts.
I smiled at her, "When he sees Fred it is!" I walked away from Hermione quickly, only partly joking. Would it really be so awful if Ron found out his brother wanted to spend time with me that way?
I sat down at the Gryffindor table next to Harry and across from Ron and Hermione. Ron and Harry were already in a discussion about Slughorn and how Dumbledore had asked Harry to get close to him – but what for, Harry wasn't sure.
"Maybe he'll go to Hogsmeade today and you can 'run into' him there?" Hermione offered up a suggestion that I didn't think sounded bad.
"Speaking of Hogsmeade, what are we doing today? Bit cold to do anything outside," Ron sounded dismal when he spoke of the weather.
I buttered a piece of toast while Harry responded, "Butterbeers?" Hermione and Ron shrugged while my heart sped up a little. Fred and I had made plans to meet at the Three Broomsticks and our time there might be a little uncomfortable if Harry, Hermione and Ron were only a couple of tables away looking at us. "Did you still want to stop by Scrivenshaft's Quills, Hermione?"
Hermione nodded, "Yes, just a quick stop!"
Ron rolled his eyes, "School shopping is never a quick stop for you. But butterbeers sound good to me, and maybe some sweets? My stash is running low…" Ron took a bite of food and then spoke again while I shoved toast nervously into my mouth, "Anywhere you fancy, Taylor? You've been rather silent this morning."
I swallowed the bread and then took a deep breath. This is it. "Well, actually…" I started, trying to not let my voice sound as nervous as I was, "I'm meeting someone in Hogsmeade."
I looked across the table at Hermione for encouragement when I heard Harry question me, "Meeting someone? Who?"
Hermione nodded, so I continued but kept my gaze low on the table. "It's, uh… Fred."
"Fred?" I looked up at Ron and saw that his entire face was scrunched up in confusion, "My brother Fred?" I nodded. "Why are you meeting Fred? Is he bringing you something?"
I took another deep, steadying breath, wishing that Ron was the type of person who was more perceptive to these situations. "No, he's not bringing me anything. We've actually been writing to each other since we came back to Hogwarts," I glanced quickly at Harry and saw that he had a small smile on his face. Relieved that at least he understood, I looked back at Ron who still looked confused.
"Letters?" he questioned again, "I've seen a couple... But why are you two writing letters to each other?" His voice sounded dubious.
"Ronald," I looked over to see Hermione looking at him incredulously, "Why do you think they would be writing each other letters?"
Ron looked down at the table and I watched his face slowly fall from being scrunched up and confused to raising his eyebrows and looking surprised. "Wait… you and Fred?" Ron shook his head.
I nodded and I was thankful to hear Hermione speak for me, "Yes, Ronald."
The four of us were silent for a moment and then finally Ron spoke, "Interesting." He almost whispered it and then went back to his breakfast. I took his silence as a sign that I was safe from further questions and continued eating my own food. I looked next to me at Harry and he was looking at me, a small smirk on his face. I smiled back and looked away, not wanting to encourage him to ask anything.
We finished eating our meal in silence and then stood, all bundling up in our coats, gloves, scarves and hats. As we made our way to the doors of the castle, Hermione stayed close to me. "I'll keep them from the Three Broomsticks if I can," she whispered into my ear. I turned and thanked her, grateful that I didn't have to worry about them watching my interactions with Fred for the rest of the day.
I stepped outside and instantly grimaced. The wind was sharp and stung when it hit my face. I wrapped my coat around my waist tightly and tucked my hands deep into my pockets, hating that I was outside. Quickly, we made our way to the gates where Filch was scanning everyone as they left the castle. On the other side of the gates, the four of us began walking at a fast pace.
"Anyone else mention what they're doing in Hogsmeade today?" Ron asked his question loudly so we could hear it over the wind.
"Uh, not that I've heard," Harry answered.
We walked a few more feet in silence when Ron spoke again, "Is Ginny coming?" He looked over towards me and Hermione after he asked the question.
"Yeah," I yelled back at him, "with Dean."
As soon as I said it, I regretted it. "Of course she is," Ron rolled his eyes and turned forward.
We walked quickly and the remainder of the trip was mostly silent. Walking into the village, my heart started pounding in my chest and a lump grew in my throat – I was getting nervous. Thankfully for most of the walk I'd been too preoccupied with the cold to worry about meeting with Fred, but now it was catching up to me. I followed the path with my three friends that would eventually and inevitably lead to the Three Broomsticks. I could see the sign that hung over the door just a few yards in front of us and Hermione began to slow down a little, causing Harry and Ron to follow her lead.
"Quills first?" she asked eagerly.
Harry shrugged, "Fine with me, I just want to get inside somewhere."
Hermione nodded at him and then turned so she was looking at me and the boys couldn't see her face. "Relax, it's just Fred. No need to be nervous," she spoke as quietly as she could.
I smiled, but wasn't sure if it looked genuine, "I'm not nervous."
An eyebrow raised on her forehead. "If you say so," Hermione smirked a little, "Have fun." With that, she turned and motioned for the boys to follow her further down the road to the quill shop.
"Have a good time," Harry told me before turning away.
After Harry passed him, however, Ron continued to stand a couple of feet away from me near the entrance to the Three Broomsticks. From the look on his face, I could tell he was thinking about something. "So you're really meeting Fred here?" he asked, again speaking loudly. I nodded, not sure what else I could say. Ron looked down at the snow on the ground and, I assumed, continued thinking about whatever was on his mind. "Well," he looked up at me and his voice sounded hallow and agitated, "have fun I guess." He grimaced as he spoke and just before turning away, his eyes moved passed me. I glanced over my shoulder and saw a tall boy walking towards us.
I turned back towards Ron to say something, but he turned away abruptly. "Ron!" I called after him, but he didn't turn around.
"Hey there," I felt a hand rest on my back and jumped as it touched me, "Sorry, didn't mean to surprise you."
I looked up and saw Fred looking down at me, smiling. "Oh, it's all right," I knew I didn't sound enthused, but I looked back to Ron walking away down the path and wondered why he acted that way. I took a deep breath and knew I needed to turn my attention to Fred before he thought I was rude, so I looked back up at him. He was also looking in the direction Ron was walking. "Let's head inside? I'm freezing!"
Fred let out an amused sigh, "Of course!" He moved his hand off my back and instead held it out for me to walk first. Quickly, I made my way to the entrance of the Three Broomsticks. Walking indoors was a relief to my senses; I could breathe easier, my eyes didn't sting from the wind and my skin was starting to feel like it wasn't frigid and frozen. I looked back to see that Fred was behind me and then headed towards a table on the back wall. While walking, Fred said he was going to get us some drinks so I sat down on one side of the table and took my hat and gloves off. I ran my fingers through my hair a couple of times – which proved difficult since my hands were numb from the cold – and hoped it didn't look too crazy from the hat and the wind, and then shimmied my big coat off.
"Here ya go," Fred sat a mug of butterbeer down on the table in front of me and then sat down on the opposite side of the table. He took a moment to go through the routine of removing all of the outdoors winter gear he was wearing and I took a large gulp of my butterbeer. My nerves had subsided but were replaced with worried thoughts about my friendship with Ron. "On a scale of one to ten," I looked up at Fred who was looking at me across the table with a glow in his brown eyes, "how much did you hate walking here in the snow?"
I bit the inside of my lip for a second and forced myself to push Ron out of my head. "Honestly?" Fred nodded after I asked, "I would have stayed in bed today if I didn't think it would have hurt your feelings too much."
Fred rolled his eyes, knowing that I was joking. "Please," the word rolled off his tongue as he smiled, "you've been looking forward to seeing me." He sounded cocky, but again, I knew it was playful and fun.
"I don't think you understand how much my body is not acclimated to snow," I flexed my fingers, attempting to restore feeling to them, "my fingertips are still numb."
"You're being dramatic," Fred said dismissively as he reached across the table towards my hand. His fingers barely touched mine and I was surprised by the swift and bold move, but then realized his purpose behind it when he spoke. "Damn, take the back," Fred let his hand rest on top of mine lightly, "your hands are freezing."
My heart was thumping and I withdrew my hand slowly. "Yeah," I gulped, "I'm going to run to the restroom. Maybe hot water will help?" I stood up as Fred nodded; I wasn't able to tell from his facial expression if he was surprised that I'd pulled my hand away from his or not.
I walked quickly to the restroom. Upon entering, I leaned against the counter. Why had I just run away from Fred? My hands would have been fine in a few more minutes on their own but I'd created an excuse to leave. I looked into the mirror and took a deep breath. "Come on, Taylor," I encouraged myself. I always had fun with Fred, and it wasn't like he'd never touched me before. He nudged me, put his hand on my back and head, leaned over on me casually, and playfully flicked me plenty of times last year. I turned the nob for hot water and listened to the water run for a minute while it got warm. Was this what I'd feared? That for some unknown reason I'd react this way? I shut my eyes hard… No. Opening them, I threw my hands under the faucet and shook them around under the water for a few seconds while the feeling in my fingertips slowly returned. I turned the water off and looked at myself again. I was acting this way because I was upset about Ron's reaction, I hadn't even given Fred a fair chance yet. I took a few more deep, steadying breaths while I dried my hands and then walked out of the restroom and back towards the table.
I looked up and saw Fred still sitting in his seat, but he wasn't alone. A tall, slender girl with long brown hair and another shorter girl with black hair were standing close to Fred and talking, but I couldn't hear what they were saying. I slowed my pace, trying to figure out if I knew the girls or not. As I got closer, I could hear the girls giggling at Fred – for what I wasn't sure – and I could see Fred sipping his butterbeer as they did. When he was setting his mug back down on the table, he saw me approaching the table and smiled broadly in my direction. "Well, it's been great catching up, but my date's back," Fred's smile remained while he looked back up at the girls and my head jerked instinctively with surprise upon hearing the word 'date.' They looked over their shoulders at me and appeared to be disappointed and then walked off.
I sat down with a smile on my face, realizing they must have been flirting with Fred. "Sorry, did I ruin your game? I can go back to the restroom if you need me to," I was laughing a little while I spoke.
"Well, since you offered," he shrugged nonchalantly and took another sip of his butterbeer, "Actually, on a more serious note, do you know who those girls were? They knew me buuut…"
I looked in the direction they had walked and saw them sitting at a table with a group of other students. I recognized the boys at their table as Ravenclaws in Ginny's year. I shook my head in response, "No, but they're sitting with fifth years. Enjoy flirting with fifteen year old girls, don't you?" I raised my eyebrow.
Fred shrugged, "I can't help that they're star struck to finally see a mature man after months at Hogwarts."
"Mature man?" I grimaced and took another large gulp of my butterbeer.
"Uh, yes," Fred said reassuringly, but his eyes were glimmering as if in a joyful dance, "I'm older, own a successful business. Very mature, you should consider yourself lucky."
"I always do," I smiled as I spoke, realizing I was having fun.
Fred had a large grin stretched across his face while he looked at me. "Want another?" he motioned towards my almost empty mug. I nodded and he stood to get us more drinks. Now, I thought, my fit in the restroom almost seemed silly. Would I need to talk to Ron later? Of course, but I couldn't do anything to help with that situation now. Fred returned and sat down with the two mugs. "So I know there has to be more going on than the small amount of information you write in your letters. How is everything?" he asked as he pushed one mug closer to me.
I shrugged, "There really isn't much going on." Fred raised an eyebrow at me. "There really isn't! I told you about everyone ogling Harry, classes, Quidditch… Hogwarts is relatively boring without an evil Headmistress running around trying to destroy everyone's lives," I smirked as I spoke, but it was almost true. My first year at Hogwarts had been so eventful, but I didn't mind the calmer aura around the castle one bit, especially knowing that things outside of the castle were anything but calm.
"Well, you have a point," Fred agreed with me, "But if you won't tell me more about you and Hogwarts, then I'm going to ask how home is. Heard from your mother?"
I was a little shocked by his question. Fred had never asked specifically about my mom before. "Uh, yeah, only a couple of letters. But we didn't write to each other much last year either," as I said it, I wondered if that was odd. I didn't notice other students writing their parents frequently, but I felt a little guilty since my mom was so far away. If something happened at Hogwarts, would she even find out?
Fred shrugged, "Can't say I ever wrote my mum much." He took a drink from his mug before speaking again, "How are things there? Everything going on is affecting the Muggle world here some… Has it reached America?"
I licked my bottom lip and then bit it while I thought for a moment. "I'm… I'm not really sure," I felt almost dumb with my answer, "I guess I don't really have any access to the Wizarding community there, so I don't know if there's things going on that are cover-ups for events caused by wizards. My mom wouldn't know either, which is a good thing, though. If my father knew about everything, there's no way I'd be here now."
"You really think he wouldn't let you come back to Hogwarts?" Fred sounded surprised by this.
"I know he wouldn't," I stressed. "I didn't attend Hogwarts until I was fifteen, and that was after begging my parents. My father is aware that something is wrong, but yes, if he knew the extent to Voldemort rising to power and the implications of that… I would be sitting in a high school classroom learning biology or Spanish right now."
"Spanish?" Fred again sounded surprised and he raised his eyebrows.
"Yes," I explained, "Texas is right above Mexico. Spanish is required to graduate."
Fred snorted, "Muggle schools are so weird…" Fred took a deep breath and looked at me, "But I am glad that you were able to return." He smiled, not an overly large one, but a small, gentle smile that only caused one wrinkle on each side of his mouth instead of several like usual.
I could feel heat rising in my cheeks and looked down, a little embarrassed that I was starting to blush.
"I have a question," I looked up at Fred slowly as he spoke, "What was up with Ron earlier?"
I hesitated, unsure of how to answer the question. "Well, it was because I was meeting you," I looked down at the table while I answered. I heard Fred sigh and then decided to speak before him. "In his defense though, I didn't tell him I was meeting you here until this morning."
"So?" Fred responded quickly.
I shrugged, "I guess he just thinks it's weird." To be honest, I wasn't sure of his exact reason, but I assumed he was just uncomfortable with the idea of another one of his friends spending time with another one of his siblings.
"I guess that makes sense," Fred said. I drank more of my butterbeer and again tried to not think about Ron. "Well, well," Fred's voice was sing-song, "speak of the devil."
I looked up and saw Ron walking in with Harry and Hermione. Hermione was looking in the opposite direction so she didn't see me or Fred, but Harry did and then made his way towards us. "Fred!" he exclaimed and Fred stood up to greet him. Ron and Hermione had followed Harry over and were standing behind him; Ron looked as if he were sulking.
Harry was asking Fred about business and his mom, so I looked at Hermione until I got her attention. "How was quill shopping?" I asked her.
Hermione smiled, but I could tell it was forced. "Good," her voice also sounded like she was trying hard to sound positive, "We actually came in to see you for a moment. We're heading back to the castle and wanted to let you know... In case you wanted to leave with us so you didn't have to walk back alone later."
I looked at her, a bit surprise. "Heading back to the castle?"
Hermione pursed her lips together tightly, but I didn't know what she was trying to tell me through her expression.
I looked up at Fred who had since stopped talking to Harry; I assumed because he heard Hermione's announcement. "I'm going to stay and have one more drink, I'll be fine to walk alone," I looked back at Hermione and assured her, "Thank you, though."
Hermione nodded at me and turned towards Fred to tell him bye. I watched her and saw that Fred was smiling, probably happy because of my decision. Fred told Harry and Hermione goodbye and then looked at his younger brother. "Hi Ron, wonderful to see you too," Fred, as usual, sounding fun and humorous.
"Hey," was Ron's only response.
The two brothers looked at each other for a moment and then Fred said, "All right then… Well, it was good to see you all." Hermione and Harry agreed and I told them I would see them at the castle soon before they departed. After they walked out of the pub, Fred sat back down. "He really does have his knickers in a twist over something," he rolled his eyes as he spoke about Ron.
I took a deep breath, "Yeah…" I took a big gulp of my butterbeer and decided that I really didn't want to talk about Ron with Fred so I changed the subject. "All right," I began, "now it's my turn to ask how your mother is doing. I miss her!"
Fred shook his head while he smiled at me. He answered by telling me that she was fine and then explaining his father's promotion at the Ministry. From there the conversation drifted to the Ministry, a few details about the Order and how no one knew what Dumbledore's plan was, and back to more lighthearted topics like new products him and George were working on. I had only intended to stay for one more drink but that turned into three more drinks before I decided I should be heading back to the castle.
Fred was leaning his head on his hand, looking at me across the table. "I'm not going to argue with you, you should probably get back soon before it gets dark since you're walking alone. But that doesn't mean I'm not disappointed."
I rolled my eyes, "I've drank five butterbeers and talked with you for hours. I've had fun, there's no reason you should be disappointed."
"I suppose," he said loftily. I stood up and Fred followed my lead. I took a moment to put my coat, scarf, hat and gloves on while I waited for Fred to also finish putting on his extra layer of clothes. Once done, he held his hand out for me to walk first so I led us out of the Three Broomsticks. Stepping outside was just as unpleasant as it had been earlier, and I winced at the wind. "Well," I heard Fred call and I turned back around to face him, "I had a lot of fun, I hope you did too." Even though he was also grimacing from the wind, Fred was still managing to smile.
"I did," I made the effort to smile back at him.
"Have a safe walk back to the castle," he said, and I bit my lip, not knowing what I should do or say. "Talk to you soon?" he phrased it as a question so I answered promptly with an 'of course.' He nodded, and then hesitated for a moment. "All right, well, hopefully I get to see you again soon," he put a gloved hand on my cheek and instantly I was taken back to memories of another boy putting his hand on my cheek; I pushed the thoughts away and wondered if Fred was about to kiss me while I felt my heart beat fast in my chest. "Bye, America," he broadened his smile and nodded at me.
"Bye, Fred," I responded and hoped it was loud enough for him to hear. His hand was still resting on my cheek and I bit my lip as his smile faltered some while he looked at me. I felt his thumb move slowly up my cheek bone and then, he smiled larger one more time and moved his hand away from my cheek and placed it into his pocket.
"Bye," he repeated and started to turn away. I smiled at him and then also turned, biting my lip hard and my heart still pounding. As I walked back to the castle, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. My time with Fred had been great and, unlike I'd feared, I only thought of Draco when Fred's action mimicked his from once upon a time. Surely, I thought, it was only because Draco was the last person to gingerly touch me in such a way. I walked quickly, eager to reach the castle and find Hermione and tell her about how much fun I'd had spending my day with Fred.
