Chapter VI

Rey sat down at the entrance of the cave, her head resting against her knees, trying to breathe, to meditate, to calm her raging spirit the way Luke had taught her many times. She failed miserably.

Now that she had finally recovered her childhood memories, she felt more confused than ever. She had thought that recovering all of the missing pieces would help her put her life in order. She had thought she had a family she had been separated from, but there was no family that could come back for her. She had been only two years old when Luke had found her – a little force-sensitive girl - almost dying of thirst and hunger in the middle of the desert, on Jakku. She'd been abandoned. Luke himself had no idea who her real parents were. He had brought her back to the Jedi temple and had treated her like his own daughter ever since.

Why had Luke not told her the truth about her past?

Now she knew. He did not want her to know about Ben Solo. About how much Rey had always cared for him, how she had always followed him around. He'd been her sun, really. There had been no one else for Rey when she was little. But her loyalty made sense. He had been so kind to her, treating her as if she really was his little sister. Making her laugh, playing with her, training her, mending her wounds. No one had made Rey so happy in her life. On that fateful night when his knights of Ren had destroyed the temple and killed everyone else, Ben had spared her life. He had even killed one of his friends to save her.

Luke was completely right, though. She shouldn't have remembered all of that, she should not have remembered Ben Solo. It was all wrong, the feelings that came back to her, those feelings that she could not deny.

She stifled the need to cry and rocked herself back and forth to calm down. Kylo Ren was no longer the teenage Ben she remembered. He was a cruel assassin, led by the Dark Side. But no matter how many times she repeated this mantra, it did not help.

She felt him coming back from the stream. He had given her some privacy after he had released her memories. He had known she would not be happy.

Kylo Ren stopped a few steps away from her and watched her in silence for a moment. Seeing her so vulnerable made him want to protect her. That feeling made him feel weak, and he hated himself for it.

"Since when... when did you realize it was me?" she asked shakily.

"I guess I knew it was you since the moment I was told that a girl from Jakku was ruining the First Order's plans," he smirked. "But I was completely sure only after my grandfather's saber chose you instead of me. You were worthy and I wasn't. You're Luke's pet padawan. It was meant to be yours one day."

"He gave it to me in the end," she said, pointing towards his belt, where her saber hung.

He retrieved it and activated it, looking wistfully at the blue light. "I always thought it was beautiful," he said. He threw it to her. "You can have it, Rey. If you wanted to kill me, you would have tried to do it last night."

She caught it, a little relieved, but avoided looking at him. She was afraid he would read her thoughts.

He sat next to her, watching her in silence.

"You're trembling," he noted. "Do you feel sick?"

She did not reply, resting her head against her knees.

Kylo Ren sighed. He wished he could hide behind his mask right now, but he had left it in the cave. Instead he looked at Rey, and felt his heart sink with her pain. He could feel her suffering through the Force. It drained him, too.

"Rey, listen to me," he said quietly. "The past is the past. You cannot hang on to the past. I've thrown mine away. You have to do the same. It will always pull you back like a curse if you don't."

She suddenly started to sob and cry spasmodically, and it was too much, far more than he could handle.

He had struggled for years with his past, trying to forget what he had been before becoming Kylo Ren. One of the most difficult things to forget had been little Rey's cries when he'd left her behind on Jakku. That image of her, crying, restrained by one of the water dealers on Jakku as he walked back to the ship ,had haunted him for years.

"Rey, stop it," he ordered, but she continued crying, growing more hysterical by the moment. She did not know what she was crying for most: her crushed hopes of retrieving her family, her confusing feelings towards him, the whole surreal situation she found herself in...

Kylo Ren suddenly leaned towards her, cradling her in his arms, and pulling her against him. He stroked her hair softly, ruining her buns, his voice quiet in her ear: "Rey, things don't have to be that bad. Luke will be there for you. He's always been there for you. You were such a strong girl back then. You'll be strong again. I know that."

She buried her face in his chest, her tears still streaming down her face, soaking the front of his shirt. They stayed like that for a while, Kylo Ren simply waiting.

After a few minutes, she started to calm down. She raised her gaze to his face, looking into his familiar dark eyes. Kylo Ren wiped a tear off her face with his gloved finger and she saw nothing but worry in those eyes. She could not help but stare at him, fascinated, vulnerable.

It was too much. Before he knew what he was doing, he leaned down and brushed his lips against hers. He did not really know what came over him. His feelings for Rey had always been pure.

But Rey's reaction to the soft kiss was even more unexpected. Her arms slipped around his neck and she pulled him closer, locking their lips together, kissing him fervently. She had never kissed anyone before, he could tell, but her passion made up for her inexperience. For a moment, he was taken by the same odd feeling he could not quite comprehend, and he deepened the kiss, unable to think about anything else than the pleasure he felt. When they finally broke for air, his mind cleared momentarily and he pulled away from her, feeling Rey's confused glare on him.

"Rey, this cannot be," he said, as coldly as he could, and got to his feet before his resolve could crumble like a sandcastle.

She sighed shakily and also stood. He took a few steps away and turned to look at her again, racking a hand through his hair.

"Do you have a tracking device on you?" he asked.

"I don't know," she said. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"If you do, your friends from the Resistance will come looking for you soon. I need to get off this planet."

He looked at her, his eyes scorching. "I'll be honest with you. I do not wish to harm you, but I will fulfil my grandfather's legacy at all costs. Nothing will stand in my way, not Luke, and not even you. I beg of you, go back to Jakku or any other planet where you feel safe. Let's not cross paths again."

Rey scoffed: "You want me to hide like a coward? Do you know how much the Resistance needs me? I'm to become a Jedi and protect them."

He closed the distance and grabbed her shoulders, his dark eyes boring into hers: "Rey, I'm asking you: do not complete your training. Stay out of this. I will bring peace and prosperity to the Galaxy."

"You have so far brought nothing but grief and destruction to the Galaxy!" she seethed.

"I will do well. I will finish what Darth Vader started," he insisted, looking mad at her lack of faith in his words.

"I'm not that little girl anymore, Ben!" she cried. "You can't tell me what to do."

"Stop using that name!" he said angrily, squeezing her shoulders roughly in his hands.

She winced in pain but stood her ground. "I will follow my own destiny," she said.

"I offered to train you when we last met," he said, a little more appeased. "If you really want to know the Force, come with me and we can fulfil Vader's dream together."

He felt Rey stiffening under his touch and she looked away. He felt it then, her temptation. It was almost palpable. "Your Jedi training is stalling..." he said. "You are not progressing as you had hoped. I can feel your frustration."

Rey looked at him miserably, her eyes still rimmed with red from her crying. She shook her head.

"Never," she said, her hand clasping on the hilt of her lightsaber. "I'll never join you."

"Look at you, Rey, you're so angry. Do you really think you made progress? Show me then!" he mocked her, igniting his red lightsaber and swirling it once, waiting for her to attack.

She did not need to be told twice. She charged at him, furious. Her anger and frustration at the whole situation was making her blood boil. Kylo Ren remained on the defence for the first few moves, deflecting her strikes easily. As the duel grew in intensity, he attacked Rey enough to throw her off balance, then force pushed her, her back violently colliding with a tree. She fell down, spitting blood as she reached for her saber again, but he kicked it out of her hand, and brought his saber close, only a few centimetres away from her face.

"You call that progress?" he asked.

She looked up at his scowling face. "Why don't you kill me right now, Ben? Do it!" she spat defiantly.

For a split second he looked stunned. Rey enjoyed the lost look on his face. "Do it, Ben!" she said again.

He switched off his lightsaber. "Go back to Jakku and stay out of my business, Rey. This is my final warning," he replied. He extended his hand towards the cave, and a moment later he was holding his helmet. He briskly walked away.

They walked in obstinate silence the whole day. When darkness took over, they found shelter by another stream, near an old tree.

Rey had been sleeping for a couple of hours when it happened.

She suddenly opened her eyes and looked across the meadow to where Kylo Ren had been sleeping, but he was already on his feet, holding his lightsaber.

It was suffocating, really. She thought it had to be an awakening – she had witnessed a few among the Jedi, but this was different. The pain and the anger were simply suffocating. The subtle fear was tugging at her very heart.

She forgot her adversity towards Kylo Ren for the moment and came closer to him.

"What is happening?" she asked.

He looked very worried, but switched off his saber.

"It's not here."

"It's so strong. Is it an awakening?"

"I don't know," he said, but she could tell he was lying.

"So much pain and fear..." she muttered, fascinated, closing her eyes.

"Go back to sleep," he said and sat down again. In fact, he was very worried. There could be only one person at the origin of this wave of anger. The dark presence was overwhelming. For the first time he wondered whether Darth Kai had been right. Snoke would eventually get rid of both of them, if Kylo Ren did not kill him first. He had to go back to the Capital planet as soon as possible.


Jamie walked with Luke from the landing track. He had just returned from one of the Resistance bases where he had left Poe Dameron. Two days had passed since the incident on Valeant, and the pilot was much better. They had been close to losing him.

Luke had rushed to meet him when he landed. They had spoken before and Luke was aware of what had happened on Valeant, but he still had questions bothering him about the incident.

"I'm sorry, master," Jamie said. "I failed the mission and lost Rey."

Luke snorted. "It's not your fault, Jamie. You made the right choice to save Poe."

"I did not imagine she would run after him. It took me by surprise that she would take such a risk."

"I don't feel like she is in any danger," Luke said. "You said he did not hurt her."

"No, he incapacitated her and then took off. He was in a hurry to catch the other Sith apprentice. I am not sure what that was all about, but they seemed to be on some sort of mission. They were accompanied by a female whose face I could not see. She did not seem Force-sensitive, but there was something odd about her that I can't quite pinpoint."

"Would it be possible that Snoke is dead? It is weird that there are three of them. This defies the laws of the Sith."

"I don't think so, master. By the way, the other apprentice disrespected Kylo Ren, it is clear Kylo Ren is not his master. Snoke is still out there, somewhere."

"This is worrisome. Just like what happened last night."

"Yes, I felt it too," Jamie said, turning to face his master. "Shall we investigate this?"

"The Dark Side will show its face soon enough," Luke said. "There is no need for that."

"What about Rey?" Jamie asked, his piercing blue eyes watching Luke with concern.

Luke sighed. Somehow he was not surprised about what had happened. Fitting of Rey to run after Ben Solo the way she'd always had when she was little. He would have liked to understand the mysterious ways in which the Force worked at times.

"Locate her and bring her back. We don't know what Ben is planning. It could be that he's thinking about taking her to Snoke. We cannot allow that."

Jamie nodded. "Master, is there something about Rey and Kylo Ren that I should know?"

"They used to be close, and always shared a special connection," Luke said dismissively. "I just hope Ben will not sway her to the Dark Side."

"Do you think he could do that?"

"He's always had more influence on her than me. But she's a grown up now. Bring her home, Jamie."

"Will do, master."

Luke took a few steps away then turned around.

"When you come back you will need to accompany me to the Capital planet. The Prince of Hasterian has asked me to see him."

"The new candidate for the Chancellor post?" Jamie asked, a little surprised. "Do you know what for, master?"

"He told me in the greatest confidence that he has received several death threats since he made his candidature public. The worst is that his daughter's life was recently in danger. Someone wants him to step away from this political race. We need to figure out what is going on. I will wait for you and Rey on the Capital planet."

Jamie Kenobi bowed to his master.

"Oh, and Jamie," Luke added, amused. "Since you are now officially a Jedi knight, you may want to get rid of your padawan tresses and outfit."

Jamie smiled and shrugged. "As you wish, master. But it will have to wait for after the mission."

Luke waved without turning back.

Jamie walked over to another X-wing and activated the control panel and Rey's tracking device.

"R2D2, let's bring Rey home."

The droid whistled happily behind him as the X-wing rose into the air.