Chapter 7 - Acceptance

16th Precinct Building

Tuesday Morning, May 6

Olivia was thinking about last night as she bounded up the steps of the precinct building. She and Rhett had met at Moretti's for pizza. Almost immediately, he had sensed that something was off with her. He gently asked about it, but did not push her.

"Are you feeling alright?" He leaned close and whispered in her ear while they were waiting to be seated.

"Huh? Oh, I'm...I'm fine." She told him, smiling.

"Okay...you seem different tonight...quiet...something happen to upset you?" He searched her eyes and she looked away.

The hostess took them to a table in the far corner. His hand on her back, guiding her, she leaned back as she answered him.

"No...no. Everything is fine." Looking at him again, she was struck again by how comfortable she felt with him, how familiar he seemed after such a short time.

"Okay..." He held her chair and pushed it up to the table as she sat down.

He seated himself and picked up a menu. "So...what kind of pizza do you like? I think you are the veggie type...am I right?" He winked at her.

"Two days and you know my deepest, darkest secrets." She laughed, but thought how he would not want to be with her if he really knew them.

"It's been three days." He joined her laughter. "Well, would you like to get one big pizza, half and half, like we want or do you prefer to get personal pizzas? Whatever you want is fine with me." He folded the menu and laid it down.

"Half and half is fine...would you eat veggie, too? I really am not very hungry..." She told him.

"I'll eat any kind of pizza...no such thing as bad pizza!" He grinned.

They placed their order and the waiter brought their drinks. Olivia had a glass of wine, Rhett a soda. She had noticed that he never ordered an alcoholic drink and wondered about it but never asked.

Rhett watched her slip back into the fog she had been in when they met up a little while ago. He knew enough to sense something was wrong, but not enough to have any idea what. She could be tired or ill or anything.

"Olivia? Olivia?" He realized she did not ever hear him calling her.

He reached up and waved his hands in front of her. "Olivia."

"Oh...I'm sorry..." She felt herself blushing.

"Listen...if you're tired or don't feel well or something...we can get it to go and do this another time..." He was a bit worried about her.

She knew she was much too quiet this evening, analyzing what was going on between her and Elliot. She couldn't help it . She kept thinking about what had happened earlier. She knew she would ruin the evening for both of them, if she did not clear the air. For some reason she found herself wanting to tell Rhett, wanting to share her innermost thoughts and feelings. She had always been so private, protective of letting anyone know too much, get too close. She took a deep a breath and started talking.

"I...uh...I wasn't honest when I said everything was fine." She looked into his beautiful blue eyes and then down at the table, picking up a napkin.

"If you want to talk about it, I'm here for you, Olivia...but please, don't feel obligated to tell me something you would rather not share, just because I asked." He smiled slightly, letting her know he meant what he said.

"I don't...I want to tell you...I want you to understand..." She paused, looking around the restaurant and then back at him. "I've had a really rough day...my partner...Elliot...I told you we've been partners nearly nine years...and well, he's my best friend...or he was...things have been kind of...well...not like they used to be. Anyway, he knows things about me that I've never shared with anyone...things from my childhood that I don't like to talk about..." She took a shaky breath and looked at him.

Rhett was watching her with such concern, she nearly started crying. He reached over and put his hand on hers, stilling them from their chore of shredding the napkin. He gave her a small smile.

"We got into an argument over the case we caught Sunday night...he thinks the girl was raped...I'm not so sure...things just don't add up...and she was also drunk. He said I blame her for what happened because she was drunk...I don't...but during our argument he insisted I was blaming her just like I blame my mother for being drunk and...and falling down the stairs to the...the subway...and...and..." She had to stop because the lump in her throat held her words prisoner.

The pain in Rhett's eyes were all she needed to see for the tears in her eyes to slide down her face. He handed her a napkin and laid his hand on her left forearm as she wiped the tears away.

"What happened to your mother?" He asked so softly she barely heard him.

"She...she...d-d-died from the fall...she was an...alco...alcoholic, a drunk. Her life was drinking and in the end it was her death, too." She sniffled and wiped at her nose. "But I don't blame her for what happened...I blame myself...I'm the reason she drank..." She trailed off.

"Olivia...how can you think that?" He could not believe she would think that was true.

"Because...because...I'm the result of her being...being...ra...ra...raped..." She started crying again.

Rhett paused for a long moment, processing what she had just told him and deciding on how to respond. "Olivia, I didn't know your mother...but I know you were not the reason she drank. She drank to numb herself from the pain of the rape, the terror...not you, not her child. She loved you or she would not have had you...don't blame yourself, you hear me?" He spoke softly, yet firmly.

He hoped what he said made sense. He hated seeing her hurting like this. She nodded her head, but said nothing.

"And I am so sorry...about your mom. He had no right to say that to you, Olivia. Didn't he know that would hurt you? I'd like to a round or two with your partner...would that make you feel better? " He could not believe a best friend could do that to her.

She laughed through her tears. "I just might have you do that. I'll keep it in mind."

"You know, my father, when he started drinking...he became someone different...it changed our family forever...I swore I would never touch alcohol. He's why I don't drink." He held his glass of soda up to her.

So that was it. They both carried scars from their childhoods, teen years. Telling him what had happened with Elliot made her feel like a load had lifted from her shoulders. It cleared the air and gave them the freedom to talk. Really talk. They shared more about their past lives and Olivia even managed to tell him more about her mother's rape and finding Simon. Along the way, she even let him know some of the things between her and Elliot. Not everything, but enough that he got the general idea that there had once been the possibility of something more.

"As long as this partner's not any kind of competition, I'm okay with him being your best friend." He told her, half joking. "When do I get to meet him?"

"He's married and got a bunch of kids, including a six month old. I promise you, he is no competition. And for now, I just want to keep you to myself." She explained. If there were a chance for her and Elliot, she would not be sitting here eating pizza with Rhett.

She was surprised that telling him about the rape and Simon was not nearly as hard as she thought it would be. There was just something about him. They talked for hours. A lot was serious, but not all. It was so easy to talk to him. She felt like she had known him forever. Now, he did know some of her deepest, darkest secrets and yet, she still felt a sense of acceptance and trust with him that lacked in all her other relationships. All except one other, that is. They laughed. She loved that he could make her laugh so much. It had been so long since she had, she nearly forgot how therapeutic laughter could be.

It made her think of the early days when she and Elliot were first partnered. They laughed a lot back then. He would tell corny jokes that he learned from his kids and sometimes they would laugh until tears were running down their faces. They would make up knock-knock jokes while on stake out. Some of them hilarious, others not making any sense, especially as the hours went by and fatigue set in, yet they still laughed at them. She missed that. She missed the people they were then. When did it change? Why?

That was the past. She found that she constantly had to remind herself that she was not going to dwell on what was or what could have been. Or should have been. She was looking to the future. As long as Rhett was in her future, she would not have much trouble at all putting the past behind. She was falling for him. Hard. Fast. Completely. Totally unlike her.

- - - - -

Elevator, 16th Precinct Building

Tuesday Morning, May 6

The elevator opened, bringing her thoughts back to the present and she stepped in, smiling to herself. Leaning over she hit the 3rd floor button and the doors began to close. Just inches from sealing shut, she watched as strong fingers, very familiar fingers reached between the closing doors and pulled at them. The doors opened and in stepped a grinning Elliot. He punched the 'close door' button and stepped back to stand beside her. She took a step to the side to put more distance between them, but there was only so far to go in an elevator.

She tried not to look at him, though she could see him clearly from the corner of her eye. Why did he have to wear that blue shirt? It was one she had given him for his birthday two years ago. The blue perfectly matched his blue eyes and she loved him in it. And that cologne. He smelled so good. She fought to keep her mind anywhere but on the handsome man that she had loved for nearly nine years and was still desperately attracted to but so angry with right now that she would take immense pleasure in smacking. Anyway, he was off-limits.

"Good morning, Olivia." He turned to her and smiled, careful to use her whole name.

"Elliot..." His name, from her lips, was not a greeting, but rather a not so subtle warning.

"What? I can't even say 'good morning' to my partner?" He was acting like nothing had happened.

She rolled her eyes and said nothing.

"Come on...Olivia. We have to talk about yesterday...I didn't mean..." He started.

"NO! We don't! What part of 'I don't want to talk to you', do you not understand?" She was nearly hollering as her glared pierced him.

"Li...I mean, Olivia...please...just give me a minute..." He was trying to be careful not to call her 'Liv' but it was difficult.

"If you don't shut up right now, I am going to hit the 'emergency' call button." She threatened, still glaring angrily at him, her finger over the red button.

He breathed in sharply through his nose, staring into her big brown eyes. He knew it was not as idle threat. He knew she would do just what she said. He threw his hands up, palms facing toward her, in a gesture of surrender.

"All right...okay...fine. Have it your way." His smile was replaced with a deep frown, narrowed eyes and tight lips.

He faced forward and when the elevator opened, he walked out ahead of her, not even pretending to extend the gentlemanly courtesies that was his normal practice. Elliot Stabler was nothing, if not a gentleman.

- - - - -

SVU Squad Room

Tuesday Morning, May 6

She followed him through the squad room to their desks, amid the curious looks of their colleagues. Munch raised his eyebrows at her as she approached. She just shook her head. Pulling her chair out, she took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down. Elliot was already sitting and had his computer up and was logging in. He did not look at her. In fact, he spent the next two hours making sure she knew he was doing just what she told him. He did not talk to her. At all. He did not even look her way.

Around 9:30, Cragen called her and Fin to his office. "DNA from the cigarettes matches DNA from one of the specimens of the alleged rape. We've also got two sets of prints from the cigarette butts. Run them and see if we get any hits." He handed them a folder with reports and fingerprint scans.

Fin took the DNA reports to read over. Olivia scanned the fingerprints and ran them on AFIS. While waiting, she impatiently clicked her pen open and closed. From the corner of her eye, she noticed Elliot glance her way a couple of times but paid no attention. After several minutes, he looked over again, this time with a hard glare.

"Think you can find a quieter way to do nothing?" Sarcasm dripped from his voice.

"What?" Clicking the pen was such a habit, she was not even aware she was doing it.

"The pen. Can you cut it out? It's irritating." He nodded toward the pen in her hand that she was still clicking.

She looked at the pen in her hand. "Oh...it's never bothered you before..." She told him, throwing it down on her desk. It flew across the littered surface, landing in the crevice between their adjoining desks.

"Yea...well...you know...things change." He shot back with a pointed look.

She held his eyes with her own stone cold stare, even as the irony of the words he chose in answer sent a stabbing pain through her heart. It was a line he spoke to her in what seemed another lifetime, yet had been barely a year ago. She thought back to that case that had them at each others' throat. While arguing over whether or not Miles Sennet had raped his estranged wife, Valerie, Elliot, who was separated from his wife, Kathy, had belittled Olivia's ideas about what happened in front of Casey and Cragen.

"I'm the longest relationship you've ever had with a man. You've no idea how bad things can get when a couple goes south." Elliot barked at her.

"And eight years in this unit tells me that I don't need to be married to know when an abusive man is escalating." She glared at him.

Later they are at it once again.

Olivia glared at Elliot. "So now we're putting victims on trial, good to know."

"Well a statement with this many red flags, no good cop would have wanted." He snapped at her.

"Especially not one with a dying marriage and a history of violence." Olivia and Elliot are face to face at this point and then Elliot walks away.

She couldn't sleep so she went to his apartment building and texted him to meet her downstairs. She knew he wouldn't be sleeping, either. She just knew. She had brought him coffee...a peace offering of sorts. This case had them at each other in an especially vicious, cutting manner and she hated it.

Early in the morning hours, sitting on his stoop, close enough that their knees bumped, the awkwardness of their relationship hung heavy between them. Elliot told her he had signed his divorce papers that day because he did not want Kathy to ever regret him. Olivia told him it was step in the right direction.

"So, are we okay?" She asked, unable to look at him.

"I...just...need space...to disagree with you...so that I don't feel like...it's going to cost me our partnership." He explained, haltingly.

"You've never been gun-shy before." She looked at him, puzzled.

"Yeah, well, you know, things change." He cast her a sideways glance.

"Well, like you said, you're the longest relationship that I've ever had with a man. Who else would put up with me?" She smirked and bumped his shoulder with hers.

That night, sitting on the stoop of his apartment building, in the wee hours of the morning, they had made up. But, in place of the anger was Elliot's barely concealed admission that their relationship had changed, had become more than partnership or friendship...that he cared deeply about her...and the awkwardness remained.

Yea, things change, she thought.He broke their showdown by turning back to his computer. Sighing, she propped her chin on her hand as she leaned her elbow on the desk. The flashing screen of AFIS indicating a match, brought her back to the task before her.

"Fin! Got a hit!" She called out.

Against his will, Elliot looked up and tried to see what had come up on Olivia's computer. She noticed and turned her screen away as if she were turning it for Fin to be able to see better. Elliot knew exactly what she was doing and he felt the anger begin to boil within him. This should have been his case. Cragen should not have taken him off just because he and Olivia had a disagreement.

Fin came running to her desk and stood looking over her shoulder at the computer screen.

"There's our 'Toly' creep." Fin read out loud. "Anatoly Gavlik. Where do they come up with names like that?"

Olivia laughed out loud. "You're kidding, right? Odafin Tutuola? Where the heck did that come from?"

Fin rolled his eyes. "You made your point, girl...you can quit laughing, anytime."

"Let me print this out...we need to get with Cragen." Olivia said as she moved the mouse and clicked a few times.

The printer to the right of her desk loudly came to life as it pulled paper inside and began to noisily print page after page. She got up to get the print job and as she bumped the pages together on top of the table to line them up to run them through the copier, Fin hollered.

"Another hit, Liv!" He moved the mouse, clicking it twice. "Luka Grigor Sorokin. Luka of Luka and Boris! This is great!"

"Print that out, too." She told him as she stapled the first batch of papers.

When the second job was finished printing, she made copies and stapled them together. She and Fin went into Cragen's office and shut the door.

Captain Cragen's Office

Tuesday Morning, May 6

"What do you have?" Cragen leaned back in his chair, taking the copies Olivia handed him.

"Anatoly Gavlik" Liv started to read.

"Anatoly...that's the name Zhanna said she remembered being called out, isn't it?" Cragen asked

"Yes, Sir. He owns Sasha's Bar...where she said she was drinking...born September 14, 1972 in Rivne, Ukraine. Came here in July 1990 on a student visa to Penn State. Became a citizen in September 1995. Two priors..." Olivia read, then nodded at Fin.

Fin picked up where she left off. "Newark, New Jersey December 1995, charged with facilitating prostitution and benefitting from its proceeds. Fined, two years probation. Arrested again, October 19, 2000, in Philadelphia, charged with aiding and abetting prostitution and profiting from it."

"Looks like he waited just long enough to get his five years in to become a citizen before starting his own business..." She pointed out.

"Or at least he was lucky enough not to be caught before then..." Cragen added.

"Luka Grigor Sorokin is the next suspect. He was born May 8, 1974 also in Rivne, Ukraine. Came here in October 1992 to visit his uncle in Jersey City. Applied for a student visa and started school at St. Peter's College. No arrests. Only reason he was on AFIS is when he was fingerprinted to become a citizen in April 1998."

"Think they knew each other before coming the U.S.?" Olivia asked.

"Very possible...they're close to the same age...could have gone to school together...check that out...if the town is small, then they probably did." Cragen nodded.

"Oh, yea...Sorokin's DNA proves he was one of Zhanna's rapists." Fin told him.

Olivia's head snapped toward Fin and she gave him a hard look. "No...it proves he was one of the men who had sex with Zhanna." Olivia corrected him.

"Yea...yea...forgot this is looking more like a prostitution rap. Sorry." Fin rolled up the reports in his hand and playfully hit Olivia on the arm. She smiled.

"But no DNA match for Anatoly..." Cragen looked down at the report again. "...Gavlik..."

"Nothing. And we still don't know who 'Boris' is..." Olivia told him.

Cragen rubbed his chin, deep in thought for a moment. "All right...looks like we've got some pretty good leads...what are you thoughts?"

"We need to question the people around Anatoly and Luka...that will take a good bit of time. We need to find out who Luka's uncle was he came to live with..." Olivia told the captain.

"And now that we have some last names, we need to check financial and property records to see how many more bars 'Toly' owns..." Fin added.

"You have your work cut out for you...Munch is teaching in that academy seminar through next week and Lake is on a case down at PS104. I'm going to put Elliot on the financial and property search. He can do most of that online from his desk. The two of you need to hit the streets. I want to meet with you for a full verbal report of your findings no later than nine tomorrow morning. And remember, if this case is heading where we think it is, it could get dangerous. Be careful." He cautioned them.

Cragen saw Olivia flinch when he mentioned putting Elliot on the research aspect of the case. As she and Fin left the office, he stood up and came from behind his desk as he spoke to her.

"Olivia..." He motioned for her to come back.

Fin looked at Olivia, then at the captain. "We'll just be a minute, Fin."

Fin nodded and headed back to his desk as Cragen closed the office door once again and turned to her. The Captain stared at Olivia but she avoided his eyes. Her bangs fell over her right eye and she seemed to be trying to hide from him. She was a beautiful lady and she was very special to him. He loved her like a daughter and he hated to see her upset or hurt.

"You got a problem with me getting Elliot to do the research." He asked softly while still staring at her.

She was biting her lower lip and twisting her watch over and over on her wrist, the AFIS report papers stuffed under her left arm. She finally looked up at him. "It's your call." The words were clipped and he knew she had a problem.

"I'd feel better knowing I had your acceptance of this decision. Olivia, we're short-handed with Munch out and someone has to be around to catch other calls. There is not much choice. It will take too long for you and Fin to investigate every aspect in a timely manner." He waited to see if she would respond.

She just stood there looking at the floor, twisting her watch. "He's not going to be in the field with you and you can get Fin to relayinformation from him."

"That will be fine. Can I go now?" She asked looking at him and nodding at the door.

He sighed deeply. "Go." Just as she opened the door, he spoke again. "You two have to work this out soon or I'm going to be forced to make a more permanent decision."

Without turning around, she stopped with her hand still on the doorknob, her back to him. She nodded and left his office.

- - - - -

SVU Squad Room

Tuesday, May 13

A week later, the Tarasov investigation had come to a near standstill due to an outbreak of a stomach virus the day after they got the hits on Anatoly and Luka. Fin had called in Wednesday through Friday last week, as did Elliot. Elliot was still out because the virus was making a run through his family, so he was off to take care of Kathy, Eli and the twins. Fin had actually ended up spending a day in the hospital, dehydrated. They would not give him a medical release for work until Wednesday. Lake was out Thursday and Friday, but was back Monday. Cragen had gone home sick late Friday and he was not back yet, either.

Olivia was the only one of the crew, besides Munch who was still at the seminar, that had not come down with it and she was trying to stay as far away from everyone as she could. She had even moved her computer and files into one of the interrogation rooms in self-quarantine from the virus instead of because she had it. Daring anyone that had been sick or around anyone sick to open the door, she made them talk to her through the intercom. She could not remember the last she had been sick or had to call in to work sick. When you're sick, you're helpless, weak, not in control. And those were three things she never wanted to be. Three things Olivia Benson was not. She hated being sick.

Cragen made it clear he did not want Olivia out in the field by herself on this case. Lake had gone with her yesterday to talk to a few neighbors of Luka Sorokin, but he was on a call now. So she ended up on the internet doing a lot of the property and financial research that Elliot was suppose to do. The morning Cragen assigned him to work on it, he did find out that Anatoly owned three more bars in New York City. Two in the Bronx and one in Brooklyn in addition to the one in Manhattan. Olivia's search found that he owned one in Jersey City and two more that he was co-owner with the Giordani Group which held the controlling interest.

The seriousness of this finding hit Olivia like a Mack truck had just run over her. The Giordani Group was a corporation owned by none other than the Solicito mob family. Long a thorn in the side of the NYPD as well as the Feds, they seemed untouchable. She sat there shaking her head. Why it never crossed her mind that the mob would be involved, she did not know. The mob, in general, not just the Solicito family, ran or at least had a hand in nearly every prostitution ring that had ever been investigated and busted by law enforcement. She wondered how Anatoly got entangled in business with them, since the Solicito family usually went to great lengths to keep it in the family.

Once they found out Anatoly owned a bar in Jersey City and was probably doing the same thing with young women there, she figured it would be a matter of time before they would have to involve the Feds. When an investigation crosses state lines, it becomes Federal. Cragen needed to be informed as soon as possible. He was suppose to be back at work tomorrow, but she decided to call him and fill him in on what she had found.

- - - - -

A/N: Encouragement: The act of giving support, confidence or hope; to help or stimulate the development of; approval. Hey, that sounds like just what I need! Thanks for providing it! ") Bensler