Act VII: Compassion
Akio pushed the soup around in his bowl while watching Haru scarf down his food. He couldn't stand the scent of the dish; he knew it should have smelled good. It had good ingredients and Haru seemed to be enjoying it; but Akio sighed and put down his spoon, having not taken a single bite. He realized it was rude, but he couldn't think of eating; he felt sick, not hungry. As usual.
Akio wanted to leave this annoying house of these judging people who expected things of him that he couldn't do. He couldn't fake a smile; he smiled sincerely at Haru, but other times, like now, he was fighting not to punch something or scream. He wanted to break something; the destruction was satisfying. Destruction was the only thing that seemed natural in his life.
He wondered how someone like him, who seemed like they would have so much darkness within based on their stereotypical personality traits, could be terrified of the darkness within others. He knew that there was still light within him; it was just too dangerous to let it show. He had been letting it be seen by Haru; he needed to stop. Haru knew his weaknesses now, and while it seemed like he would never turn his back on him, it was still a possibility, no matter how small. He hated thinking that; it was terrible. Why could he not just trust him? Why could he not believe? He wanted to believe so much: he had always held hope that there was someone somewhere that was capable of compassion and love; capable of kindness not abuse. Why couldn't he believe?
He sighed, shaking his head in defeat; he looked up to see Haru watching him looking concerned. Akio pushed his food towards Haru. "You can have that," he said calmly.
Haru left the dish in place and stood up. He walked past Akio, returning to the table with a plate of cookies in hand. "How do those look?" he asked with a smile.
What was going on? Was he… not judging him, not forcing him to do something? Offering an alternative due to concern, but not acting like he would push him? He studied the cookies before taking the plate. "I guess those look good…" Cautiously picking one up, he took a tiny bite. He blinked; This actually tastes good. He took another bite. "…Thanks," he said, looking at Haru.
Haru shrugged. "No problem," he said, leaving it at that. He returned to eating his soup.
Akio glanced towards the door, hearing it close… Apparently it had been cracked open; those nosy adults were spying on them. He shrugged, trying not to be upset; that's what they wanted, right? A break in his defenses; he sighed and nibbled on a cookie. They really were delicious. Maybe he could actually eat these. It wasn't like he wanted to starve himself; it just never seemed worth the effort to eat. He ended up slowly eating the entire plate, much to his shame. At least Haru wasn't staring at him. He was too busy devouring his own food. No judgment…
Maybe, just maybe, he could trust Haru. Maybe he finally could have a friend.
But he sure as hell wasn't going to trust those prying adults.
Haru stood up. "You can stay here and keep eating if you want," he said to his friend. "I'm going to see if I can find anything out from them."
Akio appeared to consider his options. "I'll stay here," he finally said. He seemed too upset to handle coming with.
"Alright, I'll be back," he said with a smile. He headed through the door into the living room.
Aerith looked up from talking to the others. "Is everything okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," Haru said. "I was done eating and Akio wasn't, so I left to let him finish."
She sighed. "Is he okay?" she asked with a worried expression.
Haru shrugged. "Yeah, of course. What do you mean?"
Yuffie spoke up. "He seemed so upset! And he wasn't eating anything…"
Haru's smile disappeared. "You were spying on us," he stated; he certainly wasn't asking. He wasn't that stupid.
"…Sorry," Aerith said. "We were just concerned." She looked away. "What happened to him?"
"That's none of your business!" Haru said loudly. "Even if I knew, it's not mine to tell!"
"We just want to help," Leon said.
Haru sighed. "You know what? So do I. But I won't tell you anything. He isn't used to trusting anyone, and he's just now starting to trust me. I can't take that away from him. He needs someone he can trust no matter what. Everyone does."
"Okay, but—" Yuffie began.
Haru cut her off. "No. You have no idea how much I've wanted to help over the years, but I couldn't. Now he's free. Maybe this is the best possible thing that could have happened." He shook his head. "He's finally free to do what he wants. He's no longer held prisoner by the things he's gone through.
"Look, I know you want to help. But you should understand that things aren't that easy. The best thing you can do is not compare him to Sora." Haru paused to take a breath. "From what I've heard, Sora is a difficult person to live up to. Akio hasn't had the same experiences as Sora did; nobody has the same life. And not everyone takes what they are given in the same way, nor do they react exactly as someone else. He is not Sora."
For a moment, there was silence. "…Okay," Leon said.
Haru was satisfied. "Good. Not everyone is the same. I don't know either Akio or Sora's story; but that doesn't stop me from knowing that they are different from each other. Because everyone is different, and nothing is ever as it seems on the surface. People all wear masks at one time or another. Akio's just happens to be one of anger."
Aerith sighed. "You are very wise for someone so young…"
Haru snorted. "Maybe. But that doesn't matter; it doesn't take a genius to know these things. It should be common sense. What is it with adults? You all have masks, I'm sure. You aren't the same as your parents. It should be obvious…" he paused. "I'm not trying to be disrespectful," he said seeing Leon's unreadable expression.
"It's fine," Leon said.
Akio stared out the window in the kitchen. He was annoyed: he had always wanted someone to care, but now that these people were comparing him to his father, he would rather they just forget about him. They wanted Sora; that much was obvious. They didn't want Akio. And he could never be the person they wanted.
He was just a weak, scared child. True, he was brave enough to survive his home and more recently to leave; but he was terrified of the darkness within and without. Fear was both his strength and weakness. Caution was an asset, but fear led to distrust; distrust led to interactions like he had with Aerith, Yuffie, and Leon. Then people thought he wasn't worth their time; that was both bad and good in his opinion. Any attention he had received in the past was unpleasant, so being ignored was the best option.
His eyes wandered to a candle in the center of the table, the wax dripping down from how long it had been lit; it burned brightly even before they had entered the room. He was like the flame— burning brightly, dangerous yet still capable of doing good… and with one false move, it could burn down this building, this entire town; at the same time, it took little effort to extinguish if done before it spread. His fire was having time to burn and grow now that he was away from his uncle and aunt; nobody had extinguished the little flame flickering quietly in the corner. It was a wonderful feeling, but at the same time, it was terrifying.
Akio sighed and looked down at his shaky hands. After a moment, he made sure nobody was coming in the room and rolled up his sleeves; the bruises were fading, not being replaced by the same hits; the cuts were healing, having not been opened recently. That's good, he thought as he rolled down his sleeves. He was relaxed and distracted; he wasn't living in fear that he knew was eminent. He had even calmed down from the initial interrogation.
But the flame was tempting; he could simply touch his arm to it and make a small burn; burns were better than cuts, since they healed with less scarring. It would be so easy to cover with his sleeve, like everything else. But he was strong at that moment. He stood up and blew out the candle. Crossing his arms, as always, he walked into the living room.
"So have you asked if they know how to get through that barrier yet?" he asked as he entered. Everyone jumped, apparently having not expected him to emerge so soon. He did his best to ignore that… it probably meant they had been talking about him, but he couldn't do anything about it anyway.
Haru nodded. "They said we should be able to find something here to open up the barrier; it just needs to be triggered."
"Cool," Akio said. "How exactly are we supposed to do that?"
"It's hard to say," Leon said.
Aerith shook her head. "It has happened in many different ways in the past."
"Of course," Akio said, looking down. "I guess we'll just go then." He looked at Haru while walking to the door. He won't stop me this time, will he?
Haru nodded. "Sounds like a plan," he said. He turned to the adults. "Thanks for the food." He followed Akio to the door.
"We can help you if you need," Aerith offered.
Akio shook his head. "We've got this," he insisted. He opened the door.
"Good luck," Leon said.
"Thanks," Haru said, waving.
Why?
I want to know why.
Why must I lie?
Why must I hide?
Why?
