Author's Note: I do NOT own any of the characters in this story! They all belong to Mr. Julian Fellowes.
Also:
I love this chapter...I really do. It was really fun to write! I'll admit, it's a bit of a happy chapter, which was nice, but I'm going to warn you, from here on out, it doesn't really stay happy...Just saying.
Oh, and thank you so much for your reviews! They've been wonderful, and they mean so much to me, seeing as how this is my first fic, and I was really worried about it not being good. So please, keep it up, read and review, and be my motivation!
please forgive any grammar/spelling mistakes. I've proofread this three times, so I don't think there's very many, but just in case, please forgive.
Much Love, xoxo
Anna wandered around the room gathering Lady Mary's things as she worked to prepare for their journey back to Downton. It was early afternoon and Mary and Matthew had decided to spend the day out together, and Anna took the opportunity to get things ready for their departure from France. Anna was leaving after dinner that night, and Mary and Matthew were following the next night.
She wanted to make sure Mary was all set and able to get by without her the next day. Anna made sure everything Mary would need was set out and then packed everything else. Being who she was, Anna made sure to tend to Mary before herself, even though Anna would be leaving in a few short hours. When she was finally finished with Mary's things, she headed back to her room to pack her own things.
Anna didn't take as many precautions when it came to her own clothing. She didn't have as much as Mary, and she didn't have anything nearly as nice as Mary. Anna's clothes were simple, and that's the way she liked them. Therefore, her main clothing items were packed fairly quickly, which is when she moved on to her dancing clothes: her tights, shorts, sheer blouse, and pointe shoes.
When she was packing before they left Downton, Anna didn't know whether or not to bring her dancing clothes. She wrestled with the question for hours and ended up giving in and packing them. At the time, the winning argument was "what better place to dance than France?" So with that thought in mind, she put the outfit in her case and didn't think about it again.
That is, until she actually got to France. When she was unpacking, she came across the clothing and she had an overwhelming urge to put them on and dance right then and there. However, she set them aside, resisting the temptation, and continued unpacking.
The next day, when she came across them again, she found she could not resist the temptation again. That afternoon, when she had some time to herself, she made her way into town to look for a possible place to dance for the month they were there. She had walked around the town for almost an hour and she had been about to give up hope when she passed by an open door, and heard the sound of classical music coming from inside. Recognizing the song, she backtracked towards the doorway again, listening harder. She looked around in search of a sign for the building, but was unsuccessful in her search.
Then, from inside, a loud, "To the barre, ladies!" caught her attention. Barre was a ballet term that she had heard so many times in her childhood. Without really thinking, she took a step over the threshold of the doorway, and entered into the building. She was in a long hallway where the walls were lined with framed pictures of all sorts of dancers. The music continued but the sound of hurried feet across the floor accompanied the tune for a few short seconds. Then, the music changed tempo, and Anna heard the loud clacking of heels on a wooden floor, paired with periodic shouts of, "Plié!"
Anna continued along the hall, examining the pictures on the wall while following the music, scoping out its source. As she approached the end of the hall, the music and the orders grew louder, and she saw another open doorway. She stepped forward, peered around the corner, and smiled.
The room's walls were completely made of mirrors, all four of them, floor to ceiling. There were wooden floors, and a large crystal chandelier hung from the ceiling. Anna had never seen anything like it before, and she instantly fell in love with the room. Just as she had suspected, there was a gramophone on a small table in the corner, producing the music, as well as a line of young girls in tights and leotards lined up along a barre against the far wall with a rather large, red-haired older woman pacing in front of them, giving commands.
Anna watched the scene for a few minutes, completely entranced. She felt as though she had been transported back to when she was in the same position as the young girls in front of her. She smiled again as she thought about going to dance lessons as a child and as she was reminded of why she loved dancing so much.
Then, the music abruptly ended, followed by a "Bravo, ladies! Well done! Now, lesson's over. See you in two days' time."
Anna barely had enough time to remove herself from the doorway and flatten herself against the wall before a storm of girls came piling out of the room. It didn't appear as though any of them noticed her, or if they did, they didn't say anything and ignored her presence entirely.
Anna didn't even hear the footsteps approaching behind her, and she was oblivious to the person standing behind her until that person asked, "Can I help you," which startled her greatly.
Anna turned around abruptly, struggling to find words. "Umm…Uh, no, not really. I was just—"
"You're a dancer." The woman was not asking a question. She was making a statement, in a very thick French accent.
The woman put her hands on her hips, and looked at Anna. She didn't know what to say, so Anna just nodded her head.
"I thought so."
"How could you tell?" Anna eyed her suspiciously.
"Your ankles." The woman gestured towards Anna's feet and she felt somewhat self-conscious. The woman looked into Anna's face again, and smiled. "They're strong. You ankles and your calves. They're muscular." The woman smiled again, and then waved for Anna to follow her as she reentered the mirrored room she had just left.
For a few moments, Anna just stared. She didn't know what to say. She followed the woman into the room, and took a better look around. It was even better when she was standing in the center of the room. She turned on her heel, looking at everything. The mirrors were so tall, so bright, and the chandelier was just stunning.
"You are English." Again, this was a statement rather than a question and said from behind her.
"Yes." Anna turned around to face the woman directly.
"And what are you doing here in France?"
"I'm a lady's maid. The woman I serve just got married, and we're here for the honeymoon."
The French woman nodded and crossed her arms. "And you need a place to dance."
Anna furrowed her brow. "How did you-"
The woman waved a hand at Anna, cutting her off. "That does not matter. You want to dance here."
Anna just stared. She didn't know what to say. She stuttered over her words. "Well, uh, I mean—"
"You will dance here."
Anna's jaw dropped. She was at a complete loss for words. She didn't even know this woman. She didn't even say anything along the lines of wanting to dance here. He had thought about it since the moment she came in the building, but she hadn't said anything. But somehow, this woman knew what Anna had been thinking. As much as Anna was confused about it, she was also somewhat grateful for it, seeing as how now she didn't have to ask.
The French woman laughed. She smiled, turned and walked gracefully around the room, "My name is Madame Adélaïde. This is my ballet studio." She waved an arm around her head, indicating the room around her. "I teach the art of dance to young girls three mornings a week. You do not seem like the dangerous type so you are free to use the studio any day, any time after one o'clock. After all, you are a lady's maid. How dangerous can a lady's maid be?"
Anna scoffed. "You'd be surprised."
Madame Adélaïde looked at her and raised her eyebrows. She then smiled again. "This is a safe town, so I usually do not lock the building at night. There's nothing for anyone to steal so why should I? Anyways, like I said, you're free to use it whenever you please while you're in town. Now, I must be off. Come and go as you wish."
With that, Anna watched the woman in amazement as she smiled, waved, turned, and left the building. She stared at the empty doorway for a few minutes after the woman left. Then, she smiled and followed the woman's path out the door and made her way back to Mary and Matthew. She ended up returning the next day when she had free time in the afternoon, and then used the studio almost every day for the rest of the month.
Now, as she toyed with her tights in her hands, she couldn't help but think about how worn out they had gotten recently. She picked up the shorts as well and rubbed the fabric between her fingers. She longed to be able to get a new outfit. She only needed one, but with as much dancing as she had been doing lately, the one she had would soon be turned to threads.
She set the clothes down and made her way over to her purse. She looked at the money she kept inside and chewed on her lip as she thought.
Do I have enough? Could I afford to spend the money on a new outfit? Oh, I'd love to be able to buy new tights. Would I have to tell John? No. I could get the least expensive ones I could find. That would be alright, wouldn't it? Yes, I think it would.
She closed her bag and swung it over her shoulder. She shut the case that sat open on the bed and headed out the door.
She needed to get back before Mary and Matthew did, so she walked fast down the street. She knew which store she wanted to go to since she passed it almost every day while she had been in France. In a few short minutes, she found herself staring through the front windows at the mannequins dressed in leotards. Her heart was thumping, and without another thought, she pulled open the door, heard the ding of a bell, and made her way inside.
It was dark inside the store, the only light coming from hundreds of candles scattered everywhere, and there were red and purple drapes lining the walls. There were racks of clothing and gorgeous displays all around. Anna couldn't decide where to look, so her eyes were darting everywhere.
Then, a short woman with round glasses propped on her nose came out from behind a counter in the corner asking, "Can I help you?"
Anna stepped forward saying, "Yes. I was just looking for some dancing clothing. Ballet."
"Ahh! We have plenty of gorgeous leotards just this way."
"Well, I'm not really keen on leotards. I was really just looking for a pair of tights, some shorts, and a blouse."
"Don't fret. We have those too." The woman smiled and gestured for Anna to follow her. She led her to the back of the store, down a small set of stairs, and into another room, this one even darker. The walls were lined with leotards on hangers as well as blouses, pants, and shorts.
The woman led Anna to the left wall, and pulled a couple pairs of shorts off the wall. One was black, the other a dark blue. She handed the two pairs to Anna, and then moved to the opposite wall and grabbed two sheer blouses, both different shades of light pink.
"Which ones do you like? I'm one hundred percent sure I have the right sizes."
Anna examined both the shorts in her hands and the blouses in the saleswoman's. She liked the black shorts. They were soft, almost velvet, and they were much the same as her old ones. She also liked the lighter pink blouse. Again, it was much like the one she had. She didn't want to change too much. Then another thought came to her mind.
"Which ones are less expensive?"
The woman smiled. "All of them are the same price, and they are all the least expensive in the store."
Anna sighed. Maybe she would be able to afford them. She then smiled at the woman and pointed to the lighter blouse. The saleswoman put the other one back on the wall and asked, "What about the shorts?"
"The black."
"Wonderful." The saleswoman smiled again, took the blue shorts from Anna, crossed the room to put them back, and gestured for Anna to follow her back to the front of the store. Once up the stairs, the saleswoman took the shorts from Anna, and pointed to the left saying, "tights are over there. I'll let you pick those out yourself while I take these up to the counter."
Anna smiled at her and then made her way to the display, picked out a pair of light pink tights, and then made her way to the counter as well.
She handed the tights to the woman, and then something caught her eye. To the right of the counter, there was another, wonderful display. This time, the articles being exhibited were garters.
There were at least thirty different ones on the table, with more stored underneath. There was one that caught her eye in particular. Right in the center, there was a gorgeous black lace garter, garnished with a small blue ribbon tied into a bow.
She took a step towards the table, entranced. She reached a shaking hand out to gently trace the soft lace. She smiled as she touched the fabric, thinking of what John would do if he saw it. Or, rather, if he saw her wearing it. However, the thought soon left her mind as she reminded herself that that would probably never happen. John was in prison.
"You like that? Would you like to buy it?" Anna looked at the saleswoman who raised her eyebrows and nodded at her.
She looked back at the garter, withdrawing her hand. "No. I was just admiring it."
"No! You like it, I can tell!" Anna smiled softly at her. "Here." The woman came out from behind the counter, to the display. She picked up the black garter and made her way back around the counter. "I will give you the garter for half price. You are beautiful, you have a ring, so you are married, and I can guarantee your husband will love you in this."
Again, Anna smiled weakly before saying, "No, no, no. I couldn't do that. He wouldn't even-"
The woman stopped Anna saying, "I insist. I do."
Anna sighed and looked at the garter as it sat on the counter. I really do love it. It's gorgeous. And I know John would like it. But he won't be able to see it. It's not like I can reveal the garter to him in the visitation cell. Still… It's wonderful. And I have the money. And it'll give me a reason to fight harder for John. It'll be a part of my motivation. Oh, I can't believe I'm going to say this.
"Okay. I'll take it."
"Fantastic!"
With that, the saleswoman totaled Anna's purchase, staying true to her word on the garter being half-priced. The total ended up being much less than Anna expected, and she was grateful. With the package in one hand, Anna quickly made her way back so she could pack the new outfit in her case. As she pulled the garter out of the package, she smiled again. She loved it so much.
She then thought about John again, and her smiled faded. She wished she could go to the studio once more before she left for the long trip back to Downton, but she knew she didn't have time. The entire trip, whenever she longed to see John she would go to the studio and dance, as well as whenever Mary and Matthew did something that annoyed her or made her feel guilty or jealous. Now thinking about it, she realized she had spent quite a lot of time at the studio. However, she didn't regret it. The time away had been wonderful.
Anna packed the garter with the rest of the new clothes and closed her case once and for all. She was ready to get back to Downton, get back to seeing John. The past month had been torture being away from him.
That was all she could think about that night. As she got Mary ready for dinner, had her own dinner, said goodbye to Mary, made her way to the train station, and then finally made her way back to Downton, all she could think about was John. Some of these thoughts weren't exactly happy. She ended up crying more than once along the trip, often times worrying the stewardess.
Her heart ached. She thought about the garter in her case. She thought about John's face. She thought about both of those things together. Then she again thought about how she would probably never be able to see that. She wanted it more than anything. She wanted to be able to lie in bed with John in their own cottage like they had planned. She wanted to kiss him and have him pull off her dress to reveal the garter on her leg. She wanted to see him smile at her like he used to, eye crinkles and all.
It will happen. He's innocent. He'll be set free. He will. And we'll be free to be together. Like a married couple ought to be….But what if…What if it doesn't happen. What if there's no evidence to be found? What if there is no way to get him out? I would have bought that garter for nothing. There would be no purpose for it. I wouldn't be able to look at it again.
With that, her heart broke, and a tear rolled down her cheek, just as the train continued to roll along the tracks.
