Chapter Seven: If Your Right Hand Offends You (Part I)
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"Honestly I thought it was still there. I wasn't making it all up really!" Baralia yelled as he followed Paine room to room desperate to get his point across. "Come on slow down."
She ignored him totally. The moment Paine heard the word from Yuna that All Seeing Sphere had been retrieved, she was annoyed. However, when Rikku's voiced collaborated and chimed in "years ago" the former Gullwing was truly set off.
She practically hung up on her friend incensed on the ideal of putting her cohort out of his delusional misery for real. Than, on her short trip from her hands to his throat, she was hit with an epiphany. That came in the graven image of a stack of books crashing on her foot. Baralia had carelessly stacked on the edge of the end table and when she slammed down the comlink they got shaken just enough to topple over. The hurt soared to her brain and she cursed him. She cursed everything.
Damn loony tunes Baralia with his damn stupid books. Hiding his damn TV Guide with that dumb-ass looking Shelinda on the cover doing her stink'in inter--." Her eyes became hard and narrow (and not in an angry way for a change). Swooping up the magazine Paine darted around the house to find Nooj's phone number. She had a new plan.
But Baralia didn't understand that. He read her emotions by her face and she still looked plenty pissed. "Paine look at me! Say Something to--"
"Where's Nooj's number" she asked not bothering to stop tearing the house apart.
He wished she had asked something else "I don't know. I guess I must have tossed it in the trash."
Just great. Not wasting time Paine marched into the kitchen and dumped the trash can over. Thankfully it had been low on content and she had no problem retrieving the little slip of paper concerning her senior's contact digits.
"You know we don't necessarily need Nooj's help" Baralia suggested turning away from her. "I mean we could touch bases periodically, but we don't need to report every little --" He turned back around and she wasn't there.
Paine stood in the living room one hand on her hip the other on the comlink, listening to it ring. Some one picked up, a female, probably Leblanc. "Is Nooj there" she didn't deem it essential to identify herself to her.
"Who's calling Love" the person on the other end mused. Her voiced sounded snooty and cocky emanating the feeling that regardless of who it was she was she was going to be a pain in the ass. Definitely Leblanc.
"It's Paine" she replied monotone "I need to speak with him."
"Sorry Love, but Noojie-Woogie is far to busy to converse with the likes of you! Further more--."
There was a brief scuffle, sounded like it any way, followed by the mistakable sound of Leblanc's whining. "Forgive the intrusion" it was Nooj. "What do you have to report?"
"The All Seeing Sphere is a bust. Doesn't matter though, got a new plane. You remember Shelinda right? Since she's a reporter now she has all sorts of collected info on all the senators. We could go over to Luca and asked to see some of the files."
"Just like that? Do you think her Editor will be so lenient with sharing knowledge.
"Well…."everything did have it's price. "We could offer them the exclusive when we expose the culprits."
"Sounds good" Nooj said genuinely impressed. "We'll converge in the city immediately than."
"Wouldn't be easier if we came to your place and took it from there." It wasn't like he lived a considerable distance away on the Thunder Plains and they themselves only a short ways off in Macalania Woods. Never the less there was a pregnant pause. At that moment Paine desired more than anything to be fly on the wall at Nooj's house.
"That's….not the best course of action" he carefully worded. "Stick to plan A."
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Auron counted accompany Vera the better part of the afternoon one of his more boring assignments. Not to say it wasn't challenge; on several occasions he was tempted to tell to shut up. When she prattle on too long, or simply walk away from her. He tolerated her in hopes she would spill out some valuable information, but his patients was wearing thin.
"The new stipulation regarding the Al Bhed mechina registration is well ordered" Vera declared. "I can't imagine what would happen if one of their weapons of mass destruction fell into the wrong hands. She said trying to impress him with professionalism. "You know I should make a motion to appoint a commissioner to over see this matter." They had been walking down the streets of Bevelle, but she stopped abruptly and began to needlessly reexamine the innards of her purse. "Do you know who I think would make a superb Weapons Commissioner?"
She was dropping hints to things she had no need for, "this will be all for today."
She hooked on to his arm "oh you mustn't leave. There is one more thing I need you for."
Auron grimaced, how many times did he have to tell her (with body language) not to touch him. "What other hollow task do you wish performed now?"
"Let's get our fortunes read."
"…..Why?"
"Because" Vera began defensively not really knowing how to support her decision with just cause "….it'll be fun."
Auron could have more fun planting his foot up a selective part of her antinomy and he had gained enough conviction to do so, but she was already pulling him along.
The Medium of the cart they approached looked pretty young to have any psychic powers; not to mention pretty sleepy from his drooping head. However, life had taught Vera never to judge first impressions….too harshly. "Young man" not response. "Excuse me" nothing. Piss-ant brat, if she wasn't trying so hard to trick beloved into believing her temperament had improved….
"Attention!" Auron barked in drill sergeant tone and the kid snapped to.
"Yes we like our fortunes read please."
The kid fumbled underneath the cart "together or separately" his uneven puberty stricken voice called out.
"Togerarately" the Senator and the former Guardian differing reply's mingled.
The kid reemerged with a strip of paper in his hand "Miss it says you're a star" he paused and pulled more slack "and it says your fellow here is a star. A perfect match."
Vera batted her lashes and cover her cheeks "oh my!"
"Humph."
"But that still doesn't tell us our fortunes" she pressed on.
The boy disappeared and remerged with an even longer strip of paper. "The truth of love can not be denied" he read dramatically. "Your feelings will be exposed under a star lit sky."
Vera gasped and practically swooned at the emotional dribble "awww poetry."
Nonsense, "doesn't sound right to me" Auron said flatly.
"Actually Sir you never know with this hunk of junk" the boy whipped out an over sized Cait Sith doll. "The manager said he got it to fight fiends, but no matter how much he levels it up the hunk of junk still sucks in battle."
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Leblanc sniffled back legitimate tears as she sat limp on the edge of her queen size bed. Her latest argument with Nooj had left her emotionally drained; not to mention a snot noised wreck.
The former syndicate leader had entertained thoughts of laying down some serious damage to his personal belongings, but rationality was quick to set in against that. Not only because the truly nice things that Nooj owned she had been the one to purchase, but also there would be a high likelihood of their relationship elevating from emotionally damaging to physically violent.
This was all that girl's fault, Paine. Yeah this was her doing. Noojie-Woojie hadn't gotten all worked up until she called. And just why wouldn't he tell her where he was going anyway? In that moment she suspected a cheat'in heart and romantic depression was waxed over by rage.
Rotten silver haired temptress was going after her man! Well she would put a stop to this. With new found deranged jealousy tapping into unemployed amounts of hast. In no time Leblanc had changed her cloths fixed her make-up and formulated a scheme.
But she couldn't pull it off alone, she needed an accomplice. Some one who could follow orders, but was able to make on the spot decisions on their own. Leblanc yanked a painting off the wall revealing a safe that stored some emergency gil. She knew the perfect two-faced snake that could help her out.
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"Ta-da" Rikku sang twirling out from behind her vanity wall. "So like am I a hottie or what?"
Years of absurd optimism in the mist of certain disaster had given Yuna a talent for dispensing artificial cheerfulness with out so much as a second thought to the question asked. "You're a babe" she piped enthusiastically.
The Gullwing member posed in front of the mirror and flicked her hair "yup, Sir Auron is going melt when he sees how mature I am now."
"Rikku…about that…. I really don't think you should." Her cousin's outfit, an attention seeker yellow corset with a (don't even think about bending over) orange minni skirt, promoted the idea of a night on the town. Not wooing a man who already thought of her as a child in frantic need of riddlin.
"Yuniiiiie" the thief stomp her feet irritated "be supportive. I know he's a little older than me--"
"By twenty years."
"Eighteen" Rikku corrected, "you don't age on the Farplane."
"He is still old enough to be your father" Yuna was desperate to reach any lingering reasonableness that lay dormant in her cousin's head.
"And your point being" she tapped her foot impatiently. "Need I remind you of the age gap between my parents?"
To that the High Summoner's retorted with a worrisome frown, "I'm well aware of Uncle Cid's cradle robbing ways."
Come to think of it, her Pops did have a dirty old man thing happen'in lately. Actually mostly all the men in her family, once they reached a particular age, became lecherous and fond of (many) young girls, hell look at Rin. Oh well. Sixteen, eighteen, thirty-five, tt was all the same back in the dessert." Rikku rapped her arm around her cousin "ya got to get in touch with your Al Bhed heritage Yunie!"
Yuna smiled nervously. The more she got in touch with her Al Bhed heritage the more clear it became why her father left her with the bug worshipping cult.
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Tidus had been given direct orders from Rikku to alert her the moment Auron had arrived back on the ship. So naturally the red clad warrior had been aboard a good twenty minutes before the boy realized his return.
"Whoa" he had been startled and dropped the sphere recording he was holding. "How long have you been back?"
To this Auron didn't reply. However Rikku, who had walked in with Yuna, did "long enough to know you suck at being a look out." She shoved him "you totally were slacking off!"
"I was not" Tidus shot back snatching the sphere up from the floor before either of them had a chance to investigate. "I was doing some…..research" in the form of reviewing old Gullwing spheres to see just how much Brother had been mack'in on his woman.
"Was too! You just don't want to fess up."
"Was not!"
Was too!"
"Sir Auron did you find out anything about the Senator" Yuna asked gingerly amidst the bickering buffoons in the background.
He leaned against the wall nonchalantly "she very adamant about passing that sphere hunting ban" he answered coolly.
She sensed he was holding out "anything else?" With Sir Auron if you didn't nag you didn't receive.
"I believe it's just a decoy to appease the conservatives in Spira and win votes. Her true intentions are dark and clouded." This was speculation, not entirely unfounded of course.
After they had left the fortuneteller Vera's demeanor had changed. That is to say she dropped the demure front and started to behave more like her like her old vain, shallow, clingy self. The one that talked to much and flaunted her cleverness by slipping stray pieces of information at odd times. While nerve grindingly annoying it could be, in this state she wouldn't hold her cards so close to her heart--at least not to him.
Auron straitened his posture and spoke firmly "there is something I must tell you"
"Was not too to a zillion" Rikku shouted.
"Was not to infinity" Tidus countered.
Yuna, unable to handle the distraction any longer, turned around and glared at them "knock it off! Sir Auron has something to say." Tidus mumbled, but did as he was told. Rikku stuck out her tongue.
Auron inwardly gnawed on his indignation. Down time obliterated these damn kids ability to focus. "I've concluded after this day's discoverers the proper course of action we--I should take next. Vera and I are going to get married."
They all gasped, except Rikku who made an awful high pitched nose and hit the floor.
Auron looked down at the young woman "I hoped time had disciplined her not to express herself that way."
