He enjoyed it when they were alone, with little to no chance of anybody coming in and catching them. He wondered if Toki minded it being this way, he really doubted if he noticed most of the time. Right now he didn't seem to care about much other than desperately trying to unfasten the older man's pants. Skwisgaar couldn't help, but laugh at his failed attempts, the younger man blushed and cursed at him. The pouting was cute, he was so immature; the blonde haired man kissed him deeply taking his mind off of it. He pushed his hands out of the way unfastening his pants himself, he managed to remove them without breaking their kiss. The brown haired man's tongue was prodding inside of his mouth, the occasional nip at his lower lip, and a growl deep in his throat. He really enjoyed it when he growled, it was a strangely erotic sound to hear. Nearly as erotic and strange at the dangerous light in his bright blue eyes that came on every time he was aroused. Fuck he seriously liked the way that Toki was looking at him, he liked the way his fingers were digging into the back of his neck pulling him down closer. One leg was placed across his lower back pulling him against the man under him. He ground himself down against him, the friction was a bit irritating, but he could deal with it. They stopped kissing long enough for Skwisgaar to remove the other man's shirt and pants, much better. He shoved him roughly down against the bed, grabbed his hips pulling his body up against his. Skwisgaar bit and kissed along his neck, each time he bit Toki moaned a bit louder. Nails were digging into his back hard enough to break the skin, he didn't know his nails were sharp enough to cut like that. The blonde kissed along his collar bones, tracing the tip of his tongue across his muscular chest. He envied how well built the rhythm guitarist was, he wasn't sure when he had gone from a scrawny teenager to a very well built man, it had seemed over night. Right now he didn't hate it or envy it, he was practically worshiping it. The eyes watching him closely, the heavy breathing, and the hand in his hair pulling and pushing told him what he was doing was good. Such feminine moans for somebody with such a masculine physique.
He pressed his lips against his inner thigh drawing a gasp from the younger man, he put his mouth everywhere but where his friend wanted it to be. The look in his eyes was desperate and frustrated, cheeks flushed, and sharp teeth gnawing at his bottom lip. Skwisgaar decided to be nice enough; he trailed his tongue up along the younger man's length stopping at the head and pulling away. He kissed him hard before he had time to complain or call him an asshole.
He felt around on the bed until his hand felt the bottle, he always hated having to stop what he was doing to look for lube. It was a waste of time, if it was close by then it saved him a Hell of a lot of time. Skwisgaar got the younger man onto his hands and knees, ass in the air and face pressed against the mattress. He ran his hands down his back feeling the bumps of his scars, the new and the old; Toki shivered at the feeling of fingers gliding over marks he generally tried to forget were even there. The blonde coated his fingers with lube, he slipped his fingers between the younger man's ass cheeks running them down to his entrance; he pushed slowly inside stopping half way in then pulling out. He pushed in all the way earning a whimper from his partner, when he pushed at the the right angle the brunette would moan and arch his back. He pulled his fingers out then pushed back in adding a third finger this time. When he removed them completely his friend turned his head to glare back at him.
"Hurry up"
"That doesn't make me go faster dildo."
"Please Skwisgaar"
"Eh that might work, try again."
The younger man sighed and looked away.
"Please fuck me Skwisgaar"
The Swedish man smirked at the slight annoyance in his voice.
He considered stalling for a bit longer just to get on his nerves, but thought better of it; maybe some other time. He thoroughly coated his dick with lube, he lined himself up with the younger man's entrance and slowly slid inside. He stopped half way in, the other man's body tensed up, breathing labored, and a single pained groan. Skwisgaar rubbed at his side trying to comfort him. He waited patiently for the other man to adjust, he couldn't imagine how much this had to hurt. He'd done anal with women in the past, he knew they said it was painful at first, but after awhile it felt really good.
Skwisgaar began moving again when the younger man bucked his hips back against him. He placed one hand on his left hip to try and hold him a bit still as he pushed the rest of the way inside. The sound Toki made was one less pained and more so pleasurable; always a good sign. He pulled out then pushed back in going at a slow experimental pace, he watched the way the other man reacted to each thrust especially when the head of his cock would hit against his prostate making the younger man jerk and moan out loudly. His eyes were shut tightly, moans and whimpers falling from swollen lips. His back would arch and he would buck back against the older man with every other thrust, when he could get himself to speak coherently enough he would tell him to go faster and harder. Half of the time the things he moaned were in Norwegian, for whatever reason that made it hotter, and encouraged him to obey and go harder. Skwisgaar gripped a fist full of the younger man's long brown hair wrapping it around his arm, he yanked his head back; Toki moaned loudly, he opened his eyes looking back at the older man.
"I know you like it rough, you always get hard over the weirdest shit." He commented giving another but much lighter tug to the other man's hair.
"So, you fuck old ladies."
"You're not an old lady"
"Wish I was?"
"God no" He replied, he leaned in kissing him roughly.
Skwisgaar released his grip on Toki's hair, he pulled out of him completely and lay back on the bed. The guitarist gave him a confused and irritated look until he realized what he wanted. He moved so that he now sat atop the older man, he wrapped his hand around the base of his cock as he slowly moved down onto it. He kept his eyes closed, lips parted, and head leaning back until the older man was all the way inside of him. When he opened his eyes again that erotic light was back in them, he gave the older man a smirk as he began thrusting against him. Skwisgaar placed his hands on his hips balancing him. He thrust upwards, Toki placed his hands firmly against the Swede's chest; he leaned down kissing him. Skwisgaar ran his nails down across the younger man's shoulders and back making him arch against him. The younger man's hips moved at a more erratic pace as he got closer to his climax, the lead guitarist placed his hand between them taking the younger man's cock in his hand. He stroked him going from slow to fast, the man on top of him alternated between fucking his hand and thrusting down against him. He buried his face against his chest moaning and crying out, fingers pressed hard against his skin. He came hard into the older man's hand, the way that his muscles clenched around Skwisgaar's cock drove him to his own climax making him cum inside of the other man. Their quick and frantic pace slowed then finally stopped leaving both of them breathless and sweaty.
It took a minute for Toki to finally feel comfortable enough to pull off of the other man and lay on his back across the older guitarist's bed. Skwisgaar moved so that he was laying next to the younger man, he lightly combed his fingers through his damp brown hair. Normally he didn't like people this close to him after sex, normally they slept away from him, or he sent them home. Then again normally they weren't guys he'd known for way too long to even remember anymore. He knew how Toki was though; he was clingy, emotional, and liked being close to people anywhere from complete strangers to his band mates. Strangers seemed prone to putting up with it, his band mates normally were less tolerant with his affection. Skwisgaar didn't mind it, at least not lately. He really couldn't find a good reason to give a shit. He didn't protest when Toki curled up against his side, head on his chest and arm wrapped around him. He just continued to run his fingers through his hair and occasionally touch the map of scars on his shoulders and back including the welts from where he'd scratched him just moments ago.
That had to be the weirdest part about what had happened; nobody could go back to how it used to be. The rule they created to not care about each other or spend time talking about each others personal lives, how they used to just try to ignore Toki's emotional breakdowns, and just hope he'd get over them. Skwisgaar always sort of broke those rules though; he'd wondered way too much why the rhythm guitarist had scars like that, why coins scared the hell out of him, and why his parents had basically sent him into states of shock by being around. He'd asked, he'd found out things that had pissed him off and made him feel like an asshole for complaining about his own life. Not like he told the others that he knew all of these things, that would have broken their rule. Now it didn't really matter all that much, Hell he didn't even think anybody would give a shit if they found out he was having a sexual relationship with Toki. It made enough sense; it was a big no no to hook up with band mates no matter the gender. It never seemed to end well for anybody, but he couldn't see a problem with it right now. He'd treated him like shit for way too long, the kid had always looked up to him, and gone along with too much shit. Skwisgaar had saved him from the streets, he'd always wanted to be like him, and eventually better than him. He probably should have been better to him for all of that time. He had now to make up for it, the best that he could which wasn't as much as he probably should.
He looked down to see the other man had fallen asleep; he wondered how long that would last for. He still had nightmares, lots of nightmares; it was understandable. Skwisgaar had them too from time to time, he'd only been in that place for a few minutes, but it was still enough to haunt his mind. The shit he'd seen in there was the stuff of nightmares and horror films. He still thought on what could have happened if they had made it there just one minute too late, the thought alone always made his chest feel tight and filled him with a sense of panic. It was a terrifying thought, he wasn't sure if he could have lived with that. He was having a hard enough time being okay with this outcome; the one where Toki was alive and mostly okay, but if one of them hadn't been so self involved and stupid they could have kept any of it from happening in the first place. He wished the younger man could be pissed at him about it, yell at him, or beat the fuck out of him. He just seemed to accept it and understand it. It was frustrating being forgiven when you really didn't feel like you deserved it. Skwisgaar rarely forgave people, from time to time he just liked a reason to be pissed at people, but some things were hard to really forgive. Some people just didn't fucking deserve it. He felt he himself didn't deserve it, but he'd been forgiven.
He knew that he'd get over it eventually, move on to something else. It helped that the outcome was the one where there was somebody to forgive him instead of no one at all.
