Cold air pressed against the faces of the three young males who were covered in thick and warm clothing which were provided by the Future foundation. Their packed bags surrounded them sitting on the snow.
They were standing on top of a hill overlooking a small village, with the ski-resort that they would be staying in at the far end of it.
The town had a warm and friendly vibe to it. The little wooden houses giving of light that gave an orange hue to the snow. It gave Hajime a sort of nostalgia feel, not because he visited the place before (a-matter-of-fact it was his first time so see such a snow-covered village first-hand), but probably because the village looked similar to those of the villages in RPG games that Chiaki used to play. Hajime used to watch her play those games for hours, it kind of relaxed him in a way. The sudden reminder gave Hajime's heart a jolt of pain.
The wind blew.
"Whoa! It's been a while since the last time I've seen so much snow!" The pink-haired male said. Stars were appearing in his eyes that were now filled to the brim with childlike glee.
"Tch! I like the snow but I hate this goddamn cold." said the shorter male. His body was shivering. "We've been walking for 10 minutes straight from the dock. I just want to get to the resort and get warm already."
Hajime scanned the surrounding. He tried to keep an unfazed expression steady on his face but his lips betrayed him. It was twitching.
"Hey! what's wrong Hajime?" Souda said looking a little concerned. "You aren't thinking of what just happened a few days ago, are you?"
"It's nothing." Hajime replied.
Hajime knew he was going to a ski resort; a place showering with snow. But what he didn't expect was that the snow reminded him of the person he was trying to rid off from his mind for the past couple of days. It reminded him of his white haired lover (or ex-lover?), Komaeda.
Everywhere he looked he saw snow: snow-covered trees, snow covered houses, snow-covered mountains, snow-covered rocks, snow-covered snow, snow, snow, snow, snow, and snow.
"Fuck." He muttered to himself.
"It doesn't seem like nothing." Fuyuhiko said.
"Well, maybe if you told us, we could help you out." Souda said placing his arm over Hajime's shoulder's.
Hajime huffed, a little annoyed at the constant reminder. It's not that he didn't want to tell them his problem, it's just that he wasn't ready to share it yet.
"Cheer up man! We've got this whole new world to explore for a couple of days." Souda said patting Hajime's back.
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure we could watch Souda fuck-up in his attempts to skiing." Fuyuhiko said with a grin.
"No way! I'll have you know I'm a pro at skiing!" Souda retorted.
Hajime chuckled at their banter. He was really thankful that they were there. He was thankful for the both of them.
"Let's get going!" Souda shouted. He picked up his bags and ran down the hill. "The last person to arrive will treat us dinner!" He rushed causing him to trip on a rock. He rolled down the hill screaming.
"Oh fuck!" panicked Fuyuhiko.
Both Hajime and Fuyuhiko grabbed their bags and carefully ran after the tumbling boy.
Komaeda was sitting at the center of the library. The busy male was surrounded by stacks of books with a variety of topics.
It was quiet except for the faint sounds of waves crashing. It added more to the relaxing atmosphere of the library.
The creaking sound of the huge doors opening disturbed him from his concentration. He didn't look up from the book to know who it was.
Slow and steady footsteps approached him. He placed the book down on to the table as the footsteps came to a halt. "Ah, Chiaki, so nice of you to join me." He smiled.
Her red-stained eyes with heavy dark bags under it gave away that she'd been crying and probably had no sleep for days. "Why do you look so calm? Aren't you worried about Hajime?" she said with a weak voice. "Look, it was a mistake. I didn't know what I wa—"
"Chiaki." Komaeda interrupted. "Don't worry about it. Everything's gonna be just fine. I am the SHSL lucky student after all."
Komaedas care-free attitude towards the situation at hand made Chiaki uncomfortable and confused. She gave Komaeda a worried expression.
"Komaeda, for what I did… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that to you and Hajime." Her eyes began to tear up again. She was getting dizzy. She placed her hands on the table to steady herself up.
The memories of the things that took place flooded her once again. She could clearly recall most of it.
They were at the monthly dinner party held in the Hotel restaurant. The sound of music filled the room. There were colorful decorations in every corner giving the place a vibrant look. Happy smiles were plastered on their friends who were cheering and dancing. The aroma of Teruteru's cooking lingering in the air. But there was one thing that caught her attention the most. It was Komaeda who was standing by himself near the buffet area that Teruteru prepared.
She approached Komaeda. She scanned the grey-eyed male, he had small smile on his face and he was drinking a bottle of beer.
"Hey Komaeda." She greeted.
He nodded back with a smile.
They began chatting and had small-talk. They chatted about a bunch of random topics. One thing led to the other then their conversation was centered on Hajime.
"So do you know when Hajime is coming back?" Chiaki asked him.
To Chiaki, Komaeda looked down. Her guess on why sadness was radiating off Komaeda was because Hajime was taking a while to return to the island. She too felt the same way, but she chose to keep it to herself.
"No, he hasn't told me anything yet." He said with a serious expression. "Oh hey, do you want me to get you a drink? They've got a lot of beer. Souda smuggled a whole crate of them from a foreign ship just this morning." He said changing the topic.
"Oh no— umm." she hesitated.
It was too late he walked off to get a bottle and returned and tossed it to her.
"I guess I could try it. I've never drank alcohol before." She said looking at the cold wet bottle in her hand.
They continued chatting for a while and finished their bottles of beer. They watched as their friends were having a good time.
As the party was starting to heat up, almost everyone was on the dance floor dancing to Ibuki's music. She ran her hand across the electric guitar fretboard while rocking the lead vocals. Akane and Togami finished half of the buffet already and continued to stuff their faces. Nekomaru wasn't anywhere to be seen, he was probably using the toilet.
Komaeda and Chiaki just stood there enjoying each other's company, both not really into dancing.
"Hey, I think I'm heading home." Komaeda shouted at Chiaki for his voice to be heard over the loud music.
"Can I come over? Maybe we can catch up some more and play video games like we used to do with Hajime." She shouted back with a smile.
Komaeda nodded. He grabbed more bottles of beer and placed it in a bag to take home. "For later." he mouthed.
They walked the empty streets under the moonlight. The night's breeze touching their faces. The music was still blaring behind them, but becoming softer as they were nearing the house. The bottles were clinking in the bag Komaeda was carrying. They continued on in a comfortable silence.
They reached the house and Chiaki dropped her backpack on the couch and sitted herself on the dining room chair. Her gaming console already on hand.
Komaeda was at the kitchen counter fixing up the bottles and opened two of them placing one in font of Chiaki's. He sat across Chiaki and smiled at her. He took another sip of the golden liquid.
"So, what do you want to play?" Chiaki said.
"Let me just grab the Nantendo from the room and we can browse the games we can play."
Chiaki gave him a nod and puffed her cheeks as she waited patiently.
He came back and they chose the game to play together.
They played while drinking their beer. Time flew and Chiaki didn't know how much she drank.
Chiaki's cheeks were getting hot and she was getting a bit tipsy but she continued on playing.
She beat Komaeda again for another round and looked up at him.
"Aha you really are the SHSL gamer Chiaki." he said with amazement in his tone.
Chiaki smiled and just continued staring at Komaeda… Komaeda's cute face…
Komaeda looks so attractive, she thought.
Her mind was starting to get dizzy from thinking about him in such a lustful way. Her breaths getting heavier by the second.
"Hey Chiaki, is everything okay?"
She stood up abruptly and stood in front of Komaeda who was now also standing. She approached him and he backs up slowly until his back was to the kitchen counter. Their eyes met and they continued to stare at each other for a few more seconds. She could smell his alcohol breath from the close proximity of their faces. Her whole face was getting red now, and a tinge of pink crept across Komaeda's.
She grabbed Komaeda by the back of the neck to pull him in close and kissed him on the lips. Komaeda returned the kiss and carried her while her legs wrapped around him for support. Their lips crashing together. Moans were starting to fill the air.
He carried her to the bedroom bumping at the wall at times.
The next thing she knew clothes were being thrown across the bedroom. Skin meeting skin.
She would never forget what followed. It was permanently scarred into her mind.
It haunted her, knowing that she betrayed Hajime in the most horrible way possible. She knew how deeply in love Hajime was with Komaeda. And she took it all away from him.
And the worst thing was she was fully aware of what she was doing. She couldn't blame the alcohol but she definitely could blame herself, for her uncontrollable desire. It came from nowhere.
It surprised her really. She never saw Komaeda in that kind of way before. Or maybe she always had those kinds of feelings for Komaeda deep inside her, she just didn't know for sure? Probably. But why wasn't she looking at him now the same way she looked at him that night? Maybe because she felt guilty? Maybe because she knew she ruined the relationship of the three of them? Possibly.
She was so confused. She just couldn't wrap her mind around it.
"Don't be sorry Chiaki. You did nothing wrong." Komaeda smiled.
"What is that?… A smile? Why isn't he bothered? Is this his defense mechanism, to be pretending like nothing between them happened? Why did he even let me kiss him? Maybe… he doesn't even care about Hajime to start with?" Chiaki thought to herself. She always knew Komaeda loved the boy but perhaps she was wrong.
Anger was starting to brew inside of her. She was mad at the boy for being too calm about this, but she couldn't bring herself up to accuse him of not caring for the feelings of their brown haired friend. Who knows where he might have gone to? Who knows when he's coming back? Who knows what's going to happen between them?
There was one thing she knew though. She knew she started it all. So who was she to question the white haired boy? She blamed herself for everything that happened. If she didn't give in to her lust none of this would have happened. Hajime would have been home by now. He probably would have been hanging out with both of them right now.
"Hey, don't worry about it. Everything's fine." he said. He grabbed his book back from the table and started reading again.
Chiaki wanted to ask more questions but her frustration and confusion rendered her speechless. She just did what she could do. She walked back to the doors to make her exit.
"Oh Chiaki, I assume that you haven't told the others yet. Don't tell anyone what you and I did. It would make things more complicated and hard for you."
That's right. Their friends didn't know. She felt too guilty to admit what she did. She was too ashamed. She was filled with remorse.
A few days ago, back at the restaurant after Komaeda left, she just agreed to what Komaeda said. That she was crying because she simply missed Hajime.
Their looks were that of disbelief but they brushed it off, not wanting to make her feel worse. So they didn't press her on the issue and just continued to comfort her.
She felt like scum. She didn't deseve their comfort.
"Wh-why are you so calm about all this?" She choked out. Tears continued to flow out of her eyes even more. "Don't you care about Hajime?" She asked facing the door, not wanting to look him in the eyes. "Don't you love him?"
She waited for a response. When she didn't receive any, she pushed the heavy wooden doors and made her exit.
The sound of glasses clinking, and people's chitchat rang in Hajime's ears. He was sitting on a bar stool with another glass of a random alcoholic drink he ordered. He didn't care what kind of alcohol it was. He didn't drink for the taste he drank for the numbness it gave.
His two friends were sitting on his right. Souda was talking about Sonia while Fuyuhiko looked bored out of his mind.
It was Fuyuhiko's idea to visit the local bar. He said something about wanting to get warm via alcohol and wanting to have a good time. Hajime didn't really pay attention since he was too busy being the depressed guy that he was.
His mind was already floating thanks to the Alcohol.
"We'll be right back Hajime. We just need to visit the toilet." Souda said.
Hajime gave out a sarcastic laugh to himself when they left. They weren't really gonna use the toilet. They just wanted to talk privately about him since they were obviously concerned, even though he told them a million times that he was okay.
He rolled his eyes. He was perfectly fine! There was nothing to worry about! Pfft!
A tall slender woman caught his eye. She sat beside him on his left. Hajime looked at her and blushed. She was gorgeous.
"Hey there cutie." She greeted Hajime with a wink. "I've never seen you before. You're probably visiting from another place hm?" She asked. Her smooth voice was making Hajime's spine tingle.
"Uh… Yeah." Hajime replied. "Real smooth Hajime." He thought to himself.
She took her order from the bartender and they chatted for a bit.
He stared at her and dirty thoughts entered his mind. He tried to kill those thoughts.
She could see the attraction present in Hajime's eyes. She placed a hand on Hajime's thigh, rubbing the muscle up and down while her face got closer and closer to his.
Hajime gulped and panicked. He knew he wanted to kiss her, not just because she was beautiful but mainly because he was in pain and wanted payback for what Chiaki and Komaeda did to him.
"I'm sorry." He said, he dropped a few bills of money on the bar, got his coat and rushed out. He bolted on the snowy streets not minding that it was snowing outside.
He loved both Komaeda and Chika too much to do it despite what they did.
"If I loved Komaeda so much and couldn't bring myself to cheat on him how could he do it to me." he asked himself.
"Oi! Hajime." Souda said with Fuyuhiko right beside him. Both running after Hajime.
Hajime slowed his pace down and stopped. He didn't look back. He was still looking at the distance.
They were able to catch up with Hajime, they stopped right behind him to catch their breath.
"We saw everything." Fuyuhiko said in between breaths.
Souda grabbed Hajime's shoulder to turn him around. "Hey, are you okay?" They saw fresh tears running down his cheek.
They were sitting down in Hajime's room, huddled around the fireplace. Each one having a small blanket that covered each of them.
The cracking of the fireplace filled the silence until…
"What!? Chiaki and Komaeda!?" shouted Souda.
"I never would have thought of Chiaki doing such a thing. But Komaeda… tch… those bastards!" Fuyuhiko said.
"What's their deal? I don't even think they liked each other that much." Souda added, scratching his head.
Hajime just stayed silent. He watched the dancing fire in front of him.
"Look, whatever happens, we are here for you. Got it!?" Fuyuhiko said.
"Yeah!… You should have kissed the girl while you had the chance. She looks so pretty! But only 2nd to Miss Sonia of course!" Souda giggled.
"You deserve so much better." Fuyuhiko said. He blushed a little.
"So what are you planning to do?" Souda asked Hajime.
"I don't know." Hajime said. It was an honest answer. He both felt love and hate for Komaeda and Chiaki.
After a long pause the room fell in silence.
Hajime smiled a little from his thoughts. Hajime was really glad that he invited both of them. Those two are like brothers to are always there whenever he needs them. Yeah, they had their low moments: petty quarrels to full-blown fights, but what kind of friends didn't? Just like what Souda usually says, with no doubt in his mind, Hajime considered them "soul-friends", indeed.
"Well fuck both of them." Fuyuhiko said breaking the silence.
Hajime gave out a laugh. A real laugh. He hadn't felt light like that since "that" night.
He stretched both of his hands and grabbed each of his friends who were seated on each side of Hajime and pulled them closer to give them a hug.
Hajime just smiled while they complained about the tight hug.
Life would have been hell right now for Hajime. But thanks to Fuyuhiko and Souda he felt better.
