A Hogwarts Christmas Carol

By Liltrick89

Chapter 4 – The Ghost of Christmas Past Part III

Flip, flop, stop! Snape's stomach was being to protest the memory viewing. He looked around his new surroundings; he was in a dark corridor, the only light provided by a small torch. He had spent many Christmas's here, however he was suspecting the phantom Creevey was showing him the first. Snape absentmindingly felt an inside pocket in his cloak, stroking the long, metallic object with in.

'Click clop click clop'… Snape became aware of the footsteps approaching the hallway. He peered into the darkness to see his 7th year self-entering the hallway.

Severus was nervous. His walk, though it resembled his familiar prowl, was more hurried. The 19-year-old kept fidgeting with his robes… and hair. Washed hair, slicked back in a very attractive way. He wore an expensive black cloak, which hid the usual Hogwarts uniform. His face held a poor attempt of a happy smile, which only succeeded in contorting his face into a queer expression. Something was going on – this younger version of Snape looked… happy? Nervous? Two seemingly estrange emotions for the Head of Slytherin at any point of his life.

Severus began pacing after he had been in the corridor for 5 minutes. After 10 he pulled a long, slender, golden object out of an inside pocket of his cloak. As he held it up to the flickering torchlight it was revealed to be a thin gold necklace with an outline of a heart for a pendent.

Snape walked closer to the torchlight; the heart's outline was several snakes weaving in and out of one another.

"My empty heart… snake-like…" Severus whispered, slipping the necklace into his pocket once more. 15 minutes passed – then 20. Severus continued to pace, each time going slower and slower while Snape leaned against the hallway wall, head covered by a single hand. Memories, even Potter or anyone else couldn't wish this pain on him. It was like being with a dementor. He was awaken from these thoughts by a smash. Severus had kicked a nearby painting.

"Don't place your anger on the innocent!" the painting replied shrilly.

"Sorry," Severus grumbled and began to walk away when he caught sight of some curly red hair. Turning around instantly he gave a smile, a real smile, at the approaching Gryffindor. The effect was a somewhat startled Lily, who stepped back slightly before greeting him with a nervous grin.

"I… I apologize, for being late." She began shifting her weight from one foot to the next, "But I –" she was interrupted.

"It doesn't matter Lily… I've been meaning to tell you something. Which is why I wanted to meet you here… tonight." Severus stepped closer to the girl he had been secretly meeting for a year from the day.

"Wait – I have to tell you something first," Lily's mile faded and she turned her gaze away from the Slytherin.

"Lily, this is important! I've wanted to tell you this for awhile… I… I… I lo… I love you." He finally managed to say. The words falling easier than expected, considering it was the first time he had said it to anyone. He took both her hands into his larger ones… when his fingers felt a foreign object. He looked down at her left hand. There on the ring finger was a glittery diamond settled on a yellow band of gold. His eyes widened and he opened his mouth to ask her who gave her the ring when she spoke, her voice sounding like she was choking on tears.

"I wanted to tell you… that's why I'm late, you see? James proposed!" She smiled sadly; her eyes focused on hers and Severus's hands.

He closed his mouth before opening it again, his throat suddenly tight. Damn it! Why couldn't the words come out? He tried once more, only to end up resembling a fish. Finally his vocal chords loosened, "Wha- What about us? Me?"

"It wasn't going to work, we both knew that… we're so different!" She pulled her hands from his and turned around, "You like dungeons – I'm an outdoor nut! You – you're always so thoughtful and cautious. I… well you know me – I'm emotional and outspoken. You're night; dark, captivating, and mysterious… and I'm day." She turned back around, her eyes shut as if it took all her willpower to say "This isn't science, opposites don't' attract Severus. And even if they do… it's not meant to be." Lily opened her eyes to allow Snape (present and past) to see how much this hurt her as well.

Severus opened his mouth to say something else, but she silenced him by putting her finger to his lips. The sad smile returning. "Don't worry… I'll forget everything you said tonight. You don't have to say a thing." With that she began walking.

Severus raced after her, cutting her off. "Let me give you your Christmas present please…" It sounding more like an order than a question. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the necklace, handing it to her.

She frowned letting the necklace fall as he handed it to her, her gaze turning cold. "I don't want to have anything that you're slimy hands have touched Snip!" She yelled, her mouth becoming firm, yet her eyes told a different story. It was the eyes that had caught him first. And now… now they screamed for him to forgive her…that it was for his own good. However Severus, unlike Snape, wasn't looking at her eyes, he was too busy trying to take in what she had said. She stood there for a minute before running away, her eyes streaming with tears.

Severus stood still as she left; his eyes focused on the girl. Then on the damaged necklace broken in two by the fall. He picked it up and placed it back into the pocket. Slowly he sank to the floor and head in hands he cried.

There was no reason not to cry. He was weak; love had made him that way. And so he cried, tears held back so well through his 7 years at Hogwarts coming through as if a dam inside of him had broken.

Snape reached into his pocket and pulled out the object, the image of Lily's eye's imprinted on his brain. So she hadn't really meant the last comment, something he had been tortured by all through his life. This was her way of forcing him to move on, to forget her. However she was wrong, it didn't make her any easier to let go. He peered at the object again. It was a thin, golden necklace with a heart outlined by snakes. The heart was split in half, making the necklace two individual chains. The heart represented his still. Broken.