.vi
Look at me, and tell me who I am.
Why I am, What I am.
Call me a fool, And it's true I am.
I don't know who I am.
Time's not a friend, hurrying by.
I wonder who am I?
- Jekyll & Hyde.
*
「Gaius. What do you know of angels?」 asked Merlin, a few days after Arthur's incident with the fairies.
And Gaius almost dropped the glass vial he was holding.
As it turned out, Gaius did know things about angels. His knowledge was presented to Merlin in the form of a dusty pile of books that made Merlin sneeze.
「What prompted this?」 asked Gaius, event eventually.
Merlin made a noncommittal sort of noise, not wanting to recount what had happened with Edwin more than necessary. From what he could make out, all the books depicted angels as heavenly hosts who sounded more like spirits than beings of flesh and blood. When venturing to the mortal realm, angels had to take a willing human host. And since Merlin couldn't ever remember such an event taking place, he doubted he was carrying an angel around in his skin. Or was he the angel and this was actually the body of some other child? Did this mean that Hunith was not really his mother?
Merlin had a quiet panic fit before realising that if he was indeed a vessel-riding angel, then he would have to be an amnesiac vessel-riding angel because he had no recollection of what he came down to earth for.
He sighed and closed the book he was just reading, opening up another. None of the texts explained his magic, either, or his particular brand of healing powers. Angels was said to be able to cure any illness, even bring people back from the dead – but nothing suggested that the injuries would be transferred onto the angel in question. The only thing he seemed to have in common with the mythical beings were his wings and Edwin's words.
Well. Merlin stared at the page he was currently on, the writing small and black, illustrations full of colour. Angels were meant to be guardians; watched over people or a charge and kept them safe. They were an invisible presence that diverted danger. Perhaps this was what his destiny meant? Was he sent by some unseen force to protect Arthur? Were there other angels walking around Camelot, unseen like him, watching over someone they lov-
Merlin turned the page over.
While he read, Gaius looked as if he was constantly on the verge of speaking. But when the evening drew to a close, Gaius had not said a word.
*
The black Knight smelt of death. Arthur's coronet gleamed in the light of a hundred candles, and his blade was frosted over from the cold emanating from the knight.
「To the death,」 it said, and Sir Pellinore stood back up, a black gauntlet clutched in his fist, his face as white. Later, when Arthur refused to back out of his challenge and the wraith stood unmoving and inhuman in the middle of the moonlit courtyard, Merlin conjured a fire around the knight and watched as it winked out, as if it were nothing.
*
「I don't understand,」 said Merlin for the umpteenth time, 「Does this mean I'm not an angel? I'm just a freak then?」
The Great Dragon shifted a claw upon its perch, sending a cascade of loose rocks clattering into the dark abyss that spiralled beneath the weak glow of Merlin's torch fire.
「You are neither of the heavens nor of the earth,」 said the Dragon on the exhale of a dry, smoky breath, 「What you humans know of your blood is very little at best. But you are tied to the Old Religion, and your destiny likewise to her whims.」
Merlin stared.
「What does that even mean?」 he asked, put out. 「Can't you just give me a straight answer?」
「What do you know of your father, little one?」
「Nothing,」 said Merlin honestly, 「My mother never spoke of him. I think he died before I was born. Or left.」
The dragon was staring at him with one intense, golden eye. It blinked once, a flash of rigid scales, colour dulled by the lack of sun and the oppressive darkness of the caves. When the dragon did not answer, Merlin tried again;
「A few days ago, Arthur and I chanced upon some Fae folk in the forest north of here. I think they called me something, 『Nefalim'. Can you tell me what that means?」
If Merlin didn't know better, he could have sworn something like surprise flickered through the dragons' ambient eyes. But it was gone so swiftly he wondered if he had imagined it. It reared back its head in a fluid motion that made Merlin take an instinctive step backwards.
「It means you are destined to return magic to Albion,」 it said, voice irritated and grating, 「Life back into its soil, and-」
Merlin gritted his teeth in frustration, 「Yes, but what does the word mean?」
The dragon was shifting on its perch, ready to fly off.
「Perhaps you should ask the Fae,」 it said, before launching into the air with a magnificent push of leathery wings. Merlin's irritation vanished in a second and he called after the dragon,
「Wait. Wait! You said you would teach me to fly! Come back!」
*
The problem was that Merlin could hardly say to Arthur, 『Hey, is there any chance of us going back to that patch of forest infested with the fairies who wanted to make you dance for all eternity? Because I need to ask them about what they know about wings and angels and other related matters and while we're on that subject, I've been meaning to tell you, I've got wings; have had them since forever and I also may have a little magic. Maybe.』
Arthur wouldn't take that well. The old Arthur would have thrown him to the guards at the first flash of feathers, but Merlin wasn't sure how this new Arthur – the Arthur who had given him his ring, saved him from being gutted by Edwin- would react.
So he lied.
「A whole day? What kind of herb picking requires an entire day? Unless Gaius is taking into account of your utter incompetence, in which case I can see the reasoning behind the estimation.」
Merlin rolled his eyes.
「These herbs don't grow anywhere near the castle. I've got to ride out there and then search for them. They…erm, look nearly exactly like little blades of grass so it takes a high amount of expertise to distinguish the herbs from normal grass. Er.」
Arthur looked sceptical.
「And Gaius trusts you with this…grass-herb picking?」
Merlin looked indignant, 「I'll have you know-」
Arthur waved his hand, 「Alright, alright. You'll be excused for the day tomorrow, but you'll have to make up for the chores today. Now, I need you to polish my armour again, you missed some spots earlier, and once you've finished…」
Merlin's shoulders slumped in anticipation of an exhausting day, and he mentally cursed the dragon for not giving him a straight answer and saving him the trouble of all this hassle in the first place.
*
Excalibur was beautiful. And it wasn't meant to be in Uther's gloved hand. It was supposed to be for Arthur, bright like the future that was his and Merlin's destiny. But the king took the sword from Merlin's reluctant fingers and fought for a son he loved but couldn't love.
As he fought, Merlin watched the window of Arthur's room and did not unlock his door.
*
Merlin took his usual horse – a bay that was more easy tempered than Arthur's chargers- early in the morning, wearing only a light coat. He liked mornings: when the air was cool ruffled through his wings, mornings when there were less people around and he could stretched them out without bumping anyone.
Tying a small pack, which contained some bread, ham, and three apples he nicked from Arthur's bowl when he wasn't looking, securely onto the back of the saddle, Merlin mounted the horse and soon they were out of the castle gates.
Three hours later, Merlin wasn't quite sure where they were going. He was fairly certain he was in the right area of forest: there had been a small shack just beyond the fork in the road, fences painted a dull brick red. Then there ha been those wild chickens which marked roughly where he had begun following the forest trail. But now… Merlin had thought he wouldn't have a problem, seeing as Arthur had taken them hunting here only a few days ago. But Merlin hadn't realised just how much he had been relying on Arthur's sense of direction and instructions, not really paying attention to his surroundings. He regretted not asking for more specific directions, but after Arthur's obnoxious 「You sure you're not going to get lost, Merlin?」 he didn't really have much choice but throw in a few choice insults and refuse help.
Tentatively, he dismounted, looking around at identical trees and ferns and dirt and grass and wild yellow flowers; the hardy types that bloomed all the way into the heart of winter. He shivered at the chill of a sudden gust of wind, and let his mind loosen and open up, nudging at his magic. It woke as if from a nap, tingling down to his fingertips and he let a strand of it run out through his palm, into the nearest oak, searching for that laughter and green green green of the Fae.
Someone laughed. And Merlin smiled, clambering back upon his horse and letting the green guide him.
The sun had already peaked and passed into afternoon when Merlin finally found the clearing. It glowed faintly when he looked at it from the corner of his eye (never directly), and this time, he strode right into the center of the circle and called out,
「Hello! Hello, I need to, erm, talk to you.」
There was a rustling sound, but nothing appeared. The forest was holding its breath.
「Hello! Remember me? I've got a few questions I thought you could help me with,」 said Merlin, voice braver than he felt. From their last encounter, he was pretty sure the Fae's magic didn't work on him. But he wondered all the same, what it would be like to be trapped here amongst so much -
And without fanfare, a Fae folk stepped out of the rowan tree to his right, hair billowing in the early winter breeze. The colour of his skin had changed, tinged pale this time as if heralding the arrival of a new season and the dying of an old.
「Why have you disturbed us, Nefalim?」
Merlin let out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding. Behind him, his horse snorted into the air, ears perked up and alert, stance uneasy. Merlin let his wings trail to the forest floor either side of him, relaxed.
「Why do you call me by that name?」 he asked, 「What does it mean?」
The Fae tilted its head to the left, surveying him with large, almond eyes.
「You seek knowledge?」
Merlin nodded hesitantly. 「Yes,」 he said, and then added, 「If you would be so kind.」
「There will be a price. For knowledge is something not freely given.」
Merlin swallowed.
「Price? What kind of price?」
The Fae's eyes glittered, and the forest whispered sweetness in the air around Merlin's face.
「A kiss.」
Merlin was taken a back, 「A k-kiss?」 he stuttered out, 「Why?」
「The Fae have named our price. Do you accept this bond?」
「You will tell me truthfully, everything you know about me and the meaning of 『Nefalim'?」
When the fae answered, it answered with a thousand voices that reverberated around Merlin's magic like the echoes of a spring in a cave.
「Yes.」
Merlin swallowed again, throat suddenly dry.
「O-okay. Okay then.」
*
「The fae are tricky creatures. They love to toy with mortal men and trap them with clever words and sharp wit. Their magic is…different, Merlin, and they will ensnare you if they can. You must be careful. Never take anything for granted, and be warned that they do not always speak the whole truth – oh yes, they will speak the truth and nothing but the truth, for their laws say so. If they strike an oath, they must stand by their words or risk losing their magic.」
「I'll promise to be careful, Gaius.」
「Better yet, you could not go. Perhaps these books would-「
「Gaius, I want to know. I need to know. I don't know what I am!」
A pause.
「Be careful.」
「I will.」
「Don't underestimate the Fae. They are powerful, and each one has ten times the magic of a sorcerer. Take this,」 and Gaius pressed a heavy silver pendant into Merlin's hand. The coldness of it seeped viciously into his soul and he nearly dropped it in pain, 「It has been…charmed to ward you against the glamours of the Fae. Wear it when you speak with them.」
「I will,」 lied Merlin.
*
「We are more alike than you think, Emrys,」 began the Fae, walking forwards to sit, elegantly, cross-legged on the grassy floor. Merlin hesitated, and then copied her actions, 「We share some blood, we are linked.」
「How?」 breathed Merlin, mesmerised by the colour of its eyes.
The Fae smiled at him, 「You are Nefalim,」 it said making a languid gesture, 「created by the essence of heaven and the love of a mortal woman. There has not been one like you for many, many lifetimes. So long that even many of the trees do not remember.」
「Wait,」 said Merlin, 「When you say the 『essence of heaven', what do you mean?」
The Fae looked at him for a long moment without speaking and Merlin thought, dispairingling, perhaps he was never going to get a straight answer out of the magical types. Merlin shifted slightly, his wings spread wide to either side of his body like a canopy of white, casting a large shadow in front of him.
「He was of heaven,」 said the Fae at last, it's hand hovering over Merlin's feathers, as if wanting to touch but being too afraid to.
「Like an angel?」 said Merlin, eyes wide, 「Are you saying my father was an Angel?」
The Fae sighed and ran its hand through the long grass in front of her instead, smoothing out the petals of a wild flower until it glowed within its hands.
「We know not of such human names. Those names come and go, but yes. Of Avalon, heaven, the old religion's guardians; you're father was no mortal, Emrys. And you are no common sorcerer. Your magic, it is like ours. You can taste it can't you, Emrys? Feel it in your very soul.」
Merlin's mind was reeling.
「Why did my mother not tell me any of this?」
The Fae smiled kindly, 「Perhaps she did not know.」
Merlin drew his wings back close to his body, hands pushing at the ground to stand when the Fae surged up onto its knees in a flurry of leaves and clasped both his wrists in its long fingered hands, face suddenly so close to Merlin's that their noses touched and he could smell the breath of sweet earth and dying berries.
「You are our immortal prince,」 it said, eyes glowing almost too bright, magic swirling about her like a storm, 「One of us, you're one of us Nefalim, Emrys, Emrys, Oh my Emrys,」 then the Fae's hands were cupping his face and its lips descended upon Merlin's.
He could taste magic now. It was foreign and familiar both at once, and his own magic surged up involuntarily, and there was an explosion of light behind his eyes like his nerves had been set on fire and he could see two sets of worlds, one from his own and another, alien from behind the Fae's eyes, the Fae who was still breathing the forest into Merlin's body and sucking his very memories from his mouth, flickers and flashes of Ealdor, Will, Arthur, Arthur, Arthur-
Then there was a screech of fury, loud and horrible – startled and spooked, Merlin's horse reared up and pulled free of its tether, galloping away into the forest. And a voice thundered within the very earth at Merlin's feet, making the forest shake, 「How dare you, how dare you take him for your own, Zephyr, traitor! Traitor!」 and the Fae was suddenly gone, and Merlin saw its face, scared but defiant, before everything vanished.
Swaying unsteadily, Merlin sank back down to his knees. He could still taste the kiss, the lingering magic like the sharp tang of rare oranges Arthur had once given him, disorientating. The last thing he heard was the forest breathing in time with his own racing heart before he passed out cold on the floor of the clearing.
*
In his dream, Arthur held him as he bled, his magic drained from him in an attempt to do somethinganythingsaveArthur. His blood tasted like copper coins in his mouth.
「You have to trust me more than this,」 said Arthur.
「I do. I trust you with my life,」 Merlin pleaded.
「I think we both know that's not true,」 said Arthur and let him go.
*
Merlin woke, shivering.
It was night, the forest pitch dark where trees hid the wane light of the moon. He was still in the clearing, his head aching as if he had run headlong into something. Merlin rubbed his eyes with a fist, trying to adjust to the darkness before he gave up and lit a blue orb of light with his right hand. It hovered around him, casting an eerie glow to the glade.
It was cold. Realising, suddenly, that he had no horse and absolutely no chance of finding his way out of the forest in the dark, Merlin wrapped his wings closer around himself and settled at the foot of a large tree, curling into the dip made by soft earth and thick roots. He would have to wait until morning. Slowly, he let the blue light wink out.
*
In his dream, Arthur asked again, in a meadow full of sunlight and spring flowers;
「Merlin. Do you trust me?」
「Yes,」 Merlin breathed into his mouth.
Arthur pulled away.
「I don't think you do,」 he said.
「Why not?」 said Merlin, and Arthur's eyes were the same colour as the sky overhead when he looked straight back into Merlin's own.
「I guess that's the real question, isn't it?」
*
The coolness of an early morning rain woke Merlin this time, droplets landing on his face and coating his wings in a wet, freezing sheen of water. He stretched, standing with a groan as the sun pierced through the canopy above and into his eyes.
There was no sign of the Fae. Or Merlin's horse.
Resigned, Merlin took one last look around the clearing and turned his back on it, walking in what he hoped was the right direction. He was enormously relieved when he spotted a little brown forest trail an hour later and followed that until he came to an unfamiliar stream. Merlin stopped short. There hadn't been a stream the day before.
Perhaps this was the wrong trail? Was he walking in the wrong direction? Merlin shaded his eyes with one hand and peered up and at the sun, trying to remember Arthur's lessons on how to use the sun to determine north, south, east and west. Which direction was Camelot in, again?
Merlin lowered his hand, biting his lip in worry and turning back the way he had come, walking quickly along the trail. Hours passed. The forest passed slowly by, the scenery beginning to blur together so that come noon, Merlin was well and truly lost. And hungry – his stomach cramped uncomfortably as he thought of the remaining apple in his pack and he stopped to pick some berries he recognised to keep his hunger at bay, before carrying on.
He tried using magic, like he had with the Fae – but with the fae, Merlin had already known what their magic felt like. And tracking magic with magic was much easier than tracking people, it seemed. He tried directing his thoughts at Arthur, and after a few long minutes of concentration, could make out a faint, gold presence, just out of reach. Merlin screwed his eyes shut and thought harder and there was a faint tug somewhere in his chest in a direction slightly left of the trail he was following, but the next moment the feeling was gone as it was swamped with green. Merlin sighed and obediently turned left to trudge off the trail and into the forest.
Incidentally, Merlin discovered something strange. It happened first with a few brown sparrows, chittering in the branch he had just walked passed and then taking off in a flurry of tiny wings. Then, after fifteen minutes of walking, Merlin realised that the chittering had not stopped. He was being followed by a group of sparrows. One landed on his head and Merlin stood very, very still until it took off again.
It was difficult to get a firm grip on Arthur- and Camelot's- position. Merlin didn't know whether this was because of the distance, or because he had never tried such things before or because Arthur moved around too much. Sometimes the tugs would be more insistent, and in these times Merlin would start running, hoping to cover as much distance as possible before he was forced to guess his way again.
The sparrows followed him all the way to the edge of the forest, by which time it was already late afternoon and the sight of the road was never more welcoming. In a loud, distant screech, the sparrows all scattered in every direction and Merlin barely had time to look up before something golden and large was barrelling straight for his face from above. Merlin flung up an arm to shield himself and there was a collision of weight and feathers as rough claws clamped tight around his forearm, making Merlin wince. He opened his eyes, tentatively, and gave a yell of surprise at two golden eyes and sharp beak of a falcon, staring unblinkingly back. It looked unimpressed. There was a dead field mouse clutched in its beak.
「Uh…」 said Merlin, 「Hello?」
It flexed its talons in a rather menacing fashion and Merlin winced again. The claws were terribly sharp and they were cutting right through his sleeves. In a sudden moment of inspiration, Merlin reached out slowly with his free hand, still holding the other (and the falcon) at arms length) for the dead mouse. The bird dropped the corpse into Merlin's palm, ruffled its feathers, and took off, making Merlin stagger. Merlin dropped the mouse. Then felt guilty and buried it in loose dirt at the foot of a sapling before taking to the road at a run.
It had taken half a day to ride out to the forest on horseback. It was nearly nightfall by the time Merlin reached the castle gates (thankfully still open) and the situation was not improved when one of the one of the guards gave a shout at the sight of Merlin and ran off towards the castle whilst another stopped him in his tracks.
「His majesty Prince Arthur has been looking for you,」 said the guard disapprovingly, and Merlin thought crap as he walked into the shadow of the castle and into the courtyard. Perhaps he could sneak back to Gaius's rooms without anyone noticing…
「Where the hell have you been?!」 came an angry shout from over his shoulder and Merlin turned just in time to meet a backhanded slap across the face. He reeled backwards from the force of the blow, shocked, but Arthur had him by the shoulders and was shaking him like a rag doll. In the edge of his vision, Merlin could see people stopping and staring. Arthur's expression was livid.
「Arthur!」 said Merlin, startled because he had never seen him lose his temper like this, 「What-」
「You were meant to be back by nightfall!」 continued Arthur, voice still at a shout, face inches away, 「Yesterday!」
Merlin stared, wide eyed into Arthur's face, and he tried to pull back but the grip on his arms were vicelike to the point of pain.
「I was on an errand for Gaius like I said, ow!- Arthur, 『leggo, you're hurting me.」
Arthur began tugging him back into the castle, one hand still gripped around Merlin's upper arm and he was walking so fast Merlin was stumbling to keep up. Their footsteps echoed loudly off the stone walls of the corridor as Arthur marched them up a flight of stairs and then another.
「Don't lie to me, Merlin. Don't you dare. When you failed to return yesterday Gaius confessed that were not on some imaginary errand, though he refused to tell me where you went. So tell me, Merlin, where the hell have you been?」
Merlin floundered, mind blank in the face of Arthur's fury, heart racing in his chest. But he couldn't tell Arthur. He simply couldn't.
「I don't- I was in the forest I just got lost, Arthur-」
「This is becoming an unfortunate reoccurrence, isn't it?」 came a voice and Merlin was horrified to discover Uther standing there. Arthur pulled back from Merlin but his arm still gripped his arm. There was going to be bruises.
「Father,」 said Arthur, stiffly, face still blanched with anger. Merlin kept his gaze to the floor, but they snapped up when Uther said, carelessly, as if the last time they had met, Merlin had not saved him from a slow and painful death.
「Disobedience will not be tolerated in this castle,」 turning to Arthur, he said with equal nonchalance, 「You should have him flogged. Ten lashes should do it.」
Merlin felt his entire being go cold, and he stared at Uther in horror and defiance.
Arthur was a statue beside him.
「I will see to his punishment myself, Father.」
「Be sure that you do,」 said Uther before sweeping off in a flurry of expensive clothing.
Arthur half dragged Merlin along the corridors until they reached the double doors of Arthur's chambers. The prince threw open the doors and threw Merlin into the room before slamming the doors shut behind them with a bang that made Merlin flinch. He wondered what it would feel like to be flogged. He wondered how much it would hurt – oh god, his wings!
「Arthur, please, I-」
「You will tell me. Where. You. Have. Been,」 said Arthur coldly.
Merlin swallowed, throat working. At last, he said something that was almost not a lie.
「I went back to the forest. The one where we met the…Fae.」
Arthur looked surprised for a moment; the expression flitting across his features before it was wiped clean again, showing nothing but silent anger.
「They said they knew about my father,」 said Merlin in a rush, the half lie hanging in the air of the room like the thread of a spider web – grey and fragile.
「Your Father?」 asked Arthur.
「My mother never spoke of him. I've never met him.」
There was a long silence.
「Why didn't you just tell me the truth?」 asked Arthur, and Merlin didn't have an answer to give. He adverted his eyes carefully, tracing the lines on the ground at his feet. His silence made Arthur laugh. It was an ugly sound, bitter. The prince strode across to his table as if to put more distance between the two of them.
「I thought you had been waylaid by bandits,」 said Arthur a moment later, voice strained. A surge of guilt welled up within Merlin's chest. 「Guards were sent out to search for you. Have you any idea how wor – after Edwin nearly- you will look at me when I am speaking to you!」
Merlin almost jumped at the sudden rise in volume and his eyes obediently snapped up. Arthur's voice broke off, and his hands were white knuckled on the back of his chair.
「I'm sorry,」 said Merlin, the memory of Edwin making him shiver and he realised what possibilities must have been running through Arthur's mind when he didn't return yesterday, 「I'm sorry, Arthur, I just…lost track of time. I…please.」
When Arthur made no reply, Merlin mentally steeled his shoulders and said into the tense silence:
「Well. We might as well get it over with.」
Arthur looked at him then, face still tense but raising an eyebrow.
「Excuse me?」 he said.
Merlin swallowed. 「Flogging,」 he said quietly, wings trembling at the thought.
Arthur glared at him, but his expression softened slightly.
「I'm not having you flogged, Merlin.」
Merlin blinked. 「But your father said-「
「I know what my father said.」
「Then-「
「Merlin, do you want to be flogged?」
Merlin shook his head.
「Then shut up.」
They stood there, watching the light disappearing from the window, its little shaft of gold withdrawing on the floor, the triangle growing smaller and smaller until it faded away into shadow. The left side of his face still stung from the blow, and Merlin reached to touch it tentatively with cool fingers. He let out a hiss of pain. Arthur sighed and made his way around the table, slowly approached.
「I apologise,」 he said stiffly, and Merlin looked up with surprise, 「I shouldn't have hit you.」
Merlin shrugged, relieved that Arthur's anger had all but disappeared.
「Deserved it,」 said Merlin, looking away again. Then, mustering up a half grin, he said, 「Were you worried about me?」
Arthur didn't smile back, and Merlin's expression faltered.
「You will never deceive me again,」 said Arthur, 「Do I have your word?」
Merlin stared at the unlit fire and thought about his magic , his wings, his father; who and what he was and felt as if the gulf between him and Arthur had never been so wide, even though they were standing close enough to touch. He wanted to let it all go and take that jump, tell Arthur who he really was and damn the consequences. But Merlin had never known how to fly.
「Yes, sire,」 he said, his chest aching under the weight of it all.
*
In his dream, Uther doesn't take Excalibur because Merlin is the prince's man and he warns Arthur not to drink anything Gaius gives him. Drugged.
And in the morning, it is Arthur who wakes at first light and Arthur who Merlin dresses with careful ands and Arthur who unsheathes Excalibur and says, 「It's beautiful, Merlin.」
It's Arthur who strides into the arena to face Tristan Dubois, Arthur who bleeds from the arm when the knight moves, lightening fast and it is Arthur who falls under the force of a supernatural blow. And Merlin leaps, flies over the edge of the stands and he peels the spell away from his wings with one great intake of breath. Merlin lands to the right of the knight, wings out stretched, and he reaches out a hand. As soon as his palm connects with its armour, it lets out a scream, there's a glow of white light and Arthur is back on his feet and Merlin watches as the golden blade of Excalibur strikes the knight through the chest and it explodes into a million pieces of ash...
Then Arthur turns back to him in the light of the morning sun, hair as gold as the magic in Merlin's veins, face triumphant and happy.
「You have wings!」 he exclaims, mouth curved upwards in an incredulous laugh, 「My god you have wings! They're beautiful, Merlin.」
And Merlin wakes, sobbing into his pillow.
*
--
[A/N] I'm updating here quickly so we'll be up to date. :P I do hope you are enjoying this story as much as I'm enjoying writing it. And comments are love!
