Thanks for all the reviews! This chapter's rated M.


Tom mentioned it while they lay in Santana's bed one night. Their clothes covered the floor, a messy map charting their hurried journey into bed. Santana rested against him, her head on his chest, one of his arms wrapped protectively around her. It was comfortable yet strange at the same time. She had wanted to shower; wanted to kick him out and have the bed to herself, but the news had her attention at the moment.

"You should talk some sense into Brittany, Dan's really bummed" Tom said.

"I'm sure she had a good reason" Santana replied, wondering what exactly the reason for the break up was. Tom gave a non-committal grunt.

"Besides, why are we even talking about this now?" Santana propped herself up on her elbow. "I'm gonna shower. You should probably head back to your bunk before someone notices you're gone." Tom groaned as Santana got out of bed and padded across the floor to the bathroom. He knew the Latina's hot and cold game by now, he just wasn't sure what set her off, or how or why or when. He heard the shower turn on and began getting dressed before slipping out of the room.

Santana showered slowly, making sure Tom would definitely be gone by the time she got out. She toweled off and got into a pair of boxers and a tank top. Her bed smelled like high school boy and she wrinkled her nose as she rolled over onto her side. This was only the third time they had slept together but every time had left Santana feeling…dirty. She was always distracted, or trying to distract herself, while Tom was in bed with her. It never took long but she filled her mind with images of someone else – if she tried hard enough she could even picture a gentler pair of hands on her, a softer body. The burning in her belly was never fully relieved and she was growing more irritated as well as apprehensive.

After gnawing her bottom lip raw, Santana finally fell into a dreamless sleep.


Little flyers sprinkled the tables at lunch the next day advertising a performance by Bunk 11. The whole camp was expected to be in the multipurpose auditorium after dinner to cheer on their fellow campers. Santana scanned the flyer and saw the small note at the bottom thanking Brittany Pierce for choreographing and teaching the dance.

"You going?"

Santana looked up at Brittany as she sat down across the table.

"I guess. I've heard the choreographer's awful though." She replied, a smile tugging at her lips. Brittany couldn't help the grin that spread across her face and Santana hid the rest of her smile in a big bite of food. She felt a small sense of satisfaction at making the blonde smile and stole a glance at the girl who was now talking about the recital with Jen. She noticed Samantha watching her and quickly returned to her food, the satisfaction of a second ago gone, replaced by anxiety.

The anxiety only worsened later on when she heard Samantha call her name as she left the dining hall. She was halfway to the multipurpose building when she turned around.

"What's up Sam?" Santana asked as casually as she could, not liking the growing pit in her stomach. Samantha closed the distance between them

"Um, this may sound ridiculous but…what – is there something – what's the deal with you and Brittany?"

Santana's eyes widened and she quickly put on an incredulous voice.

"What does that even mean, Sam?" she gave a forced laugh and looked around as the entire camp made their way from the dining hall to the auditorium.

"I dunno, Tom told me about your day off and I've just seen the way you look at each other," Sam pressed on as Santana blanched, the darker girl's reaction only reinforcing her thoughts. "And when you guys got back from your day off I saw her leave your room later." She finished it as more of a question than statement.

"Sam, do you realize how crazy you sound right now?" Santana postured less than convincingly. She could only hold her intuitive friend's eye contact briefly before looking away. Sam put an arm around her shoulder and opened her mouth to respond.

"Whatcha talking about?"

Santana started at the sound of Jen's voice.

"Just speculating on which songs Bunk 11's going to dance to," Sam glossed over smoothly, giving Santana's shoulder a small squeeze. Santana didn't realize she had been tense until she sighed and felt her body relax.

"They're probably going to do Lady Gaga or Ke$ha or something up that alley." Jen suggested as they began walking. Samantha smiled and wrapped her other arm around Jen's shoulders.

"I'm sure it'll be awesome whatever they do – Brittany's damn good at her job."


The show was pretty successful by camp standards. No one passed out or forgot their moves, and the sound system didn't skip. The bunk gave a big 'thank you' to Brittany and even managed to drag her on stage, where she blushed and took a small bow. The boy campers howled and wolf whistled for their female counterparts before counselors ushered them out of the building, rolling their eyes as they told the campers to get ready for bed. Santana, Jen, and Samantha had hung around, waiting to get Brittany alone to congratulate her. The blonde beamed as her friends patted her on the back, and she stole quick glances at Santana, who gave her a small smile and congratulatory nod.

The remaining group of staff members dissolved and Santana excused herself from any late night hangouts, saying she needed a good night's sleep. She returned to her room, going over tomorrow's schedule in her head. Not long after she changed into pajamas there was a knock at the door. Santana got up to open it and found Brittany standing on the porch.

"Hey" she said, the now regular barrage of emotions flaring up in her chest. She hoped her voice didn't reveal them to the girl in front of her.

"Hey" Brittany responded. "Mind if I come in?"

Santana paused before stepping back into her room. "Please," gesturing inside the room before she closed the door behind the taller girl.

"So, what'd you think of the performance?" Brittany asked, standing awkwardly in the middle of Santana's room. The Latina remained standing as well, not daring to invite Brittany to sit on the bed.

"It was really good. It looked like the girls had a lot of fun."

"They were a lot of fun to teach." Brittany nodded. They fell into an awkward silence that complemented their awkward positioning. Santana stared at the floor and shuffled her feet before looking up at the blonde.

"Why'd you break up with Dan?"

Brittany cocked her head to the side. "Who said I broke up with him?"

Santana considered the question for a moment. "Tom made it seem like you were the one who did the 'breaking'…"

"Oh yeah – how's that going by the way?"

Santana searched for the sarcasm in the question but couldn't find it. She frowned and felt Brittany move towards her; felt her body tense. Brittany tucked a strand of hair that had fallen across Santana's face behind her ear. Her touch felt like fire on Santana's skin and the darker girl turned her head sideways, unable to handle the close proximity though her feet remained rooted in their place.

"I broke up with him," Brittany murmured, her hand lingering on Santana's face, tracing her jaw line. "Because it isn't fair to him."

"What isn't fair?" Santana breathed, her eyes cast downwards.

"This," Brittany whispered, almost exasperated, as she turned Santana's head towards hers, leaned in, and kissed her. Santana exhaled a breath she hadn't realized she was holding and her hands found Brittany's waist, torn between pushing away and pulling closer. The pounding in her chest and the burning in her stomach held her there, melded her body against Brittany's.

Without breaking the kiss the blonde took a guiding step forward and Santana felt herself lowering down onto her bed. She felt the panic rise like bile in her throat but felt something stronger keep her on the bed, keep her under the girl straddling her. Brittany pulled back in need of air.

"You ok?" she asked breathily, her blue eyes concerned yet confident as they searched Santana's. Santana closed her eyes, unable to meet Brittany's. She nodded carefully, giving over to her body's response and trying to tune out the screaming of alarm bells in her mind. Brittany leaned back down and Santana greeted her with a hard kiss, nipping at her upper lip. She felt a tug at her shirt and complied, helping Brittany pull it off.

Santana watched as Brittany pulled her own shirt off, marveling at taut abs and full breasts freed from her bra. She crossed her arms over her own chest; the small scars from her surgery suddenly feeling more noticeable than ever. She had gotten it done over a year ago and only now for the first time felt self-conscious.

Brittany moved Santana's arms gently and ran a hand over each scar. She saw the darker girl flinch under her touch and stopped, replacing her hand with her mouth. She took a nipple between her teeth and Santana gasped. Brittany moved to the other one, flicking the hardened peak with her tongue. She kissed up Santana's chest, lingering over her collarbone and neck before returning to her lips. She wedged a leg between Santana's, pressing her thigh up against her through her shorts. Santana moaned into Brittany's mouth and pushed down on her leg, desperate for more friction.

"Please" Santana let out in a groan, knowing what she wanted but unable to ask.

Understanding, Brittany slipped a hand under the elastic waistband of Santana's pajama shorts. Her fingers slid easily through Santana's folds, getting a feel for the girl as she whimpered beneath her. Santana wound her hands through Brittany's hair, gripping her tightly as her tongue explored her mouth. She broke her grasp as Brittany pushed two fingers inside of her causing her to curse under her breath and squeeze her eyes closed. The blonde nipped and kissed at Santana's ear and neck as she thrust into her, Santana's heavy breaths falling in her ear, spurring her on. The darker girl fisted her sheets and her breathing came in quicker gasps. Brittany brought her thumb down over Santana's clit and with a few more strokes Santana could have sworn she saw bursts of light – stars even – as she came crashing over the edge.

She was vaguely aware of the blonde rolling off her and onto the small sliver of bed next to her. She was more aware of the small tingles still shooting through her trembling body; the way her chest heaved as she remembered to breathe. Santana rested a hand on her stomach, running it up to her chest where she found the scars. She always forgot they were there.

Brittany leaned over and kissed Santana on the cheek while taking her hand in hers. She watched the darker girl carefully before opening her mouth.

"When'd you get it done?"

Santana's brow creased.

"The very beginning of last summer," Santana murmured, lacing her fingers with Brittany's, ignoring the alarm bells that were growing loud again. She waited for the next question but it didn't follow.

"Aren't you going to ask me why I did it?"

"I figured you would tell me if you wanted to."

Santana kept her eyes trained on the ceiling. "I kept telling myself it was for me; I liked the way they looked when the doctor showed me an altered picture…but it wasn't for me. Well, it was for attention; I wanted to be noticed. Which I guess is for me, but…" she trailed off. Again, she waited for a comment, judgmental or rationalizing. Instead, she felt Brittany's hand under her chin, turning her to face the blonde. Soft lips covered her own briefly.

"You're beautiful"

Santana stayed quiet. After a few moments Brittany sat up, scanning the floor for her shirt. She leaned over Santana and managed to grab it off the ground. Santana watched her as she stretched out over her, her breasts brushing against the covers Santana had pulled up; her back flexing as she balanced herself while leaning over.

You're the beautiful one, a voice in her head told Brittany, her lips not getting the memo. The blonde pulled her shirt on and readjusted her ponytail.

"Do you want me to stay or go?"

They both knew the question was rhetorical and Santana hated it. Santana closed her eyes, feeling Brittany's on her. She had to ask it, and Santana had to answer. The Latina rolled onto her side, facing Brittany, her eyes still closed.

"I want you to stay."

She felt the springs in the mattress shift under Brittany as she lay down. Santana rolled onto her other side, turning her back to the blonde. Her eyes opened as she felt Brittany's hand snake over her side and come to rest on her stomach; felt her body press against hers. Comparisons between tonight and the night before plagued her and she shivered when the nagging thought 'they don't even compare' ran through her placed a kiss on her shoulder blade and Santana relaxed, noticing the exhaustion that had overtaken her.

She fought the sleep pressing heavily on her eyelids and listened as Brittany's breathing slowed. For a moment she chased after the fleeting desire to escape – to get out of bed and run to her car, to drive somewhere – anywhere. Or even to just slip from her bed and pass out on the spare one across the room. Santana shook the thought from her head, not sure she could move from this spot even if she wanted to.

Brittany sighed in her sleep against Santana's back and the darker girl closed her eyes, hoping she could fall asleep before she had time to do any more thinking.