Chapter Seven: The Roar of the Linamentum Praedatorius
In a strangely non-eventful manner, gobs of time passed, so we won't bore you with the details. Needless to say, they went to classes, did some homework and had to hang out with Harry, Ron and Hermione. Now halfway through October, the school was abuzz with the prospect of the upcoming Halloween ball. However, despite this joyous mood, a small portion of the Gryffindor table was in low spirits. In addition to being outcast and treated like freaks by a large portion of the student body, they were now being forced to listen to Sammy as she bemoaned her so-called rival.
"God, I hate that Fudgey McMuffin! He's such a douche bag!" Sammy steamed.
"I don't know…I kind of like Fudgey. He's sweet, but not too sweet." Reagan smiled.
"What are you talking about? He's stupid!" Sammy continued.
"No, he's very…sweet." Reagan smiled.
"Did you hear his answer in class? Seventy-two? What kind of answer is that?"
"Well, if you look at it from an existentialist point of view it's actually rather witty!" Reagan chuckled.
"He didn't mean it that way! He's just stupid!" Sammy ran her fingers through her hair roughly.
"Why do you always assume the worst about people? I mean, I would probably not be too keen to know what you think of me." Reagan sighed. "I'd probably get a long list of faults."
"Well…no, but you're diff….I…uhhh….Look, the thing is that I-"
"Look!" Sammy visibly deflated at being interrupted and lost her confession momentum. "Ha ha ha! Chewie's eating food off of the Hufflepuff table and the weenies are too scared to do anything about it!" Cora laughed.
"Well, give them some credit! Chewie does have sharp teeth." Bridgit said sarcastically.
"Hey! It's time we get to class!" Hermione suddenly bustled into the conversation. By now, they were beyond used to it.
"Thanks Hermione!" Bridgit said distractedly. "Oh! You should probably go wash your face in cold water. I heard closed pores prevent knowledge from leaking out."
"By golly, that makes so much sense! Right! I'll meet you there!" She then ran off hurriedly to the ladies' room.
"Gets easier every time." Bridgit giggled.
"Well, we should go anyway." Sammy looked at her watch.
"Oh thanks! You made me waste the pores excuse!" Bridgit bemoaned her creative loss.
"That's okay. It's my turn to think of an excuse next. Give your brain a rest, goodness knows it needs it from all that thinking." Cora punched her friend lightly.
"Friend!" Bridgit said in a Frankenstein's monster voice.
"See you guys!" Reagan waved as they parted ways.
"Whoooooo! I like peaches!" Bridgit spun around in circles with her finger on her nose.
"That's…great. But we have to go to Care of Magical Creatures now." Cora smiled in concern.
"Is she always like this?" Harry whispered to her.
"You idiot! You've seen her! OF COURSE she's always like this!"
"Oy…is she always this mean?" Ron whisperingly asked of Bridgit.
"Hmmmmm…yep!" She smiled brightly. "But I forgive her because she gives me stuff!"
"Hey!" Cora looked affronted.
"Oh, come on! You know I was kidding. You never give me stuff." Bridgit giggled.
"Damn straight!" Cora folded her arms with fierce pride. "Now come on, ladies! Onwards!"
"B-but we're not-" Harry began, but Ron clamped his hand on Harry's mouth.
Everyone followed, not speaking a word, obviously in agreement that Harry was a woman. Finally, after a lengthy uncomfortable silence, they arrived at Hagrid's cabin.
"A'righ' everyone, today we'll begin the trainin' of your cradillos, bu' firs' yeh'd best be lookin' after their daily needs." He shook a small pouch of peppercorns, and then several snow shovels and garbage bags to take care of their freakish droppings. "Everythin' yeh need's in the shed ou' back."
"Is it just me, or is he leaving out more consonants as time goes on?" Cora wondered aloud.
"'e' 'a' 'o' 'o'e 'a' 'o'a'y." Hagrid said in response with fierce pride.
With nothing to say in the face of this perfectly logical statement, the five shrugged and went about their business.
A few moments later, Cora sat in the field bathing her cradillos in a steel wash bin full of frothy, flesh-coloured bubbles.
"There you go, Aluicious! You'll be nice and clean!" Cora cooed, scrubbing her cradillos with a washcloth.
"Breee! Breee!" Aluicious sounded, eating some bubbles.
It's so stupid! It can't even talk right! I'll bet it has the intelligence of a flea! Moonmist snapped, perched on Cora's shoulder.
"What's the matter with you? What do you have against my precious Aluicious?" Cora looked warily at her pet.
"Aluicious this"…"Aluicious that"…"I have a crush on Harry!" Why don't you play with ME anymore? Moonmist snapped.
"I don't have a crush on Harry!" Cora screamed.
"What?" Harry looked up.
"Nothing." Cora growled.
She's got it for you bad. Moonmist grinned.
Cora threw him in the wash bin.
"Moonmist is being a pill because he's jealous of Aluicious. Just ignore whatever he says right now." Cora offered an explanation.
"Oh…okay." Harry tried to force a smile. Damn! I'm just too sexy. I've got to tone it down a bit or even more weirdos will be flocking to me.
"Hmmm…" Hermione looked pensive.
I'm not jealous! I'm just wet! Why would I be jealous of that thing? Moonmist clambered up to perch on the side of the bin.
"Breee!" Aluicious kissed Moonmist on the top of his head.
Did you see that? It just tried to eat me! Moonmist flew hysterically back onto Cora's shoulder.
"She didn't! She loves you!" Cora looked at her dragonette, all starry-eyed. "She thinks you're her daddy!"
As if I'd ever father anything that ugly. Moonmist retorted, however not sounding nearly so angry.
"Awwww…I think you love her too. Do you want to help me wash behind her ears?" Cora offered, scratching under Moonmist's chin.
No. Moonmist said sulkily. But I'll go get another towel. Not because I like her or anything…but just because I feel like it…
"Okay, 4 o'clock! You see the ball? See it? You see it? Okay, ready?" Bridgit held up a ball as 4 o'clock crouched back on his haunches.
"Go get it!" Bridgit chucked the ball.
4 o'clock, contrary to his awkward appearance, ran with incredible speed, but had to wait until the ball landed because he did not have much in the way of jumping abilities. Still, he brought the ball back, seeming proud.
"Breee!" It looked happy.
"Well, I'll bet you want something more challenging, so here's this Rubik's cube!" Bridgit handed it the puzzle.
As she bent down, 4 o'clock suddenly scrambled up Bridgit's arm and snatched the bag of peppercorns from where Bridgit had been keeping them in her hair. Satisfied, 4 o'clock started to munch away.
"Wow! You're really smart, 4 o'clock." Bridgit marveled.
"Wouldn't take much to outsmart you, ummm…are you a mudblood?" A passing Malfoy asked.
"Ummmm, no, but not like there's anything wrong with that."
"Oh. Well…ummmm…ummmmm…oh yeah! Savage!" He said proudly, and then walked off to find Bottom.
"That boy has got to stop being so prissy." Bridgit sighed. "Well, 4 'oclock, I guess it's me and you- holy cow!"
Bridgit stared in amazement at the Rubik's cube, which had been solved.
"Did you do that?" She asked, looking for 4 o'clock.
She saw her cradillos a few metres away in the field with Chewie. 4 o'clock batted the ball away and Chewie yapped in delight and tore off after it.
"Whoa." Bridgit breathed. "He taught Chewie to play catch too! Is there anything these things can't do?"
"Hey, yours is pretty smart, teaching Chewie a trick and all. Maybe you should think about entering him in the smart contest." Neville said, coming up behind her.
"The what?" Bridgit looked at him in confusion.
"It's a contest Hermione came up with to see whose cradillos is the smartest." Neville explained.
"Well, I don't think so. There's more than one way to measure intelligence and I doubt whatever she picked is best. Besides, 4 o'clock is having fun playing with the dog. Are you going to enter yours?" Bridgit asked.
"Well, I don't want Chester to feel the shame of failure." Neville looked a little downcast.
"Ah, don't worry about it! See? Now Chester is playing catch with them too!"
Neville sniffed, getting all emotional. "He has friends!"
"Uhh…quite." Bridgit said, going to sit on the other side of the field.
"Come on, Einstein! Remember your training. I mean, it's Replacement Crabbe, for crying out loud! He wasn't even good enough to BE Crabbe! You can squash him like a bug! SQUASH HIM LIKE A BUG!" She screamed.
"Uhhh, Hermione, you're scaring us." Ron whimpered.
"GET USED TO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING DOWN TOO!" Hermione roared.
Einstein, who hadn't stopped making noises since the beginning of the chess match, suddenly started crawling forwards.
"Yes! That's it, baby!" Hermione perked up.
Einstein picked up a chess piece in his mouth and started eating it. It was the pawn in front of the king to a diagonal.
"Look how confident he is! He doesn't even think he needs extra pieces to win against your stupid Stick." Hermione grinned triumphantly.
"Stick pretty." Replacement Crabbe drooled.
Spurred on by this show of sentience, Stick lunged forward and picked up a bishop in her mouth.
"Ha! Stupid bugger picked up one of the best pieces in the game! No doubt to eat it." Hermione crowed.
However, Stick then placed the bishop on the diagonal, putting Einstein's king into checkmate. Hermione looked stunned.
"How could you forget what I taught you?" She turned to Einstein. "Oh well, come on. I'll go feed you because you're at least good at eating."
Einstein swallowed the pawn and burped.
"Well, I'm glad her crazy hockey mom stage is over." Harry sighed.
Suddenly, Replacement Goyle came tearing through the bushes screaming at the top of his lungs. Plunging into another copse of bushes, he was pursued quickly by Darling, who was adorned with pretty pink ribbons and ready to rip his head off.
"But you look so glamorous, Darling! And I haven't even finished giving you the poodle 'do!" He screamed.
Malfoy, sitting and watching Bottom eat grass only to vomit it up thirty seconds later, was quickly losing his patience with this waste of his time.
"Well, you stupid rotter, it seems that I won't need to take care of you for too much longer. And at the same time I'll be able to avenge myself on those two savages and possibly even get Hagrid kicked out. I suppose I do owe Grainger something. After all, she inspired me to actually do some research on this." Malfoy smiled evilly at his blissfully unaware cradillos. "Hmmm…be complacent while you can."
He pulled out from his flowing black robes something shaped almost like a conch shell, only with many more twists and turns in it.
"Let's see how you lot like this!"
He put the shell to his lips and blew. An ear-splitting cry rang through the clearing. All of the cradillos looked up from what they were doing and then all hell broke loose.
The cradillos all abruptly perked up their heads and the wool on their backs began to straighten and stand on end. Their pupils contracted in a primeval fear response and they began to speak. Not their usual cheerful call, but a frightened and angry reptilian hiss. As a second call blasted out, they all leapt to their feet and scurried all higgledy-piggledy in hysterics, attacking or running over anyone who got in the way of their search for cover. However, the slightest sound caused them to panic and run around more.
"What's going on?" Replacement Goyle screamed, "Darling is much more agitated than usual!"
Said cradillos was foaming at the mouth, madly gnawing on Replacement Goyle's leg, eyes looking wildly in different directions.
"'I'. E'e'o'e 'a'e 'o'e!" Hagrid yelled to all of his students.
"Hagrid! Your accent has hit critical mass! We can't understand you anymore!" Hermione yelled.
People were running around screaming in mass panic. Obscured in his hiding place, a bush, Malfoy, "tee hee" ing evilly, held onto his sides to keep them from splitting. It had happened once before and he was not keen to revisit it. However, he was then promptly attacked by Bottom, who wanted the hiding spot.
"What are you doing, you little- AHHHHHH!" Malfoy screamed as Bottom hit him in the face with his spikey tail. "Not the face!"
Malfoy fell backwards onto the conch shell, shattering it in the process. He whipped out his wand.
"Interior parstis fragoris!" A jet of black lightining whipped out and smashed against Bottom.
Bottom's wool suddenly swelled a bit and he got puffier, but aside from that, nothing happened.
"What? No! Why?" Malfoy the uneducated screamed as his cradillos kicked the living snot out of him.
"Crap! We can't use spells against them because they absorb magic!" Bridgit grimaced at this bleak realization.
"Well, it's that screaming sound that's made them upset, so-" Cora raised her hands to cast a spell.
"Are you deaf? We can't use magic against them!" Bridgit growled.
"Well…I'm about to be!" Cora smiled at her own poor joke.
"What?" Bridgit didn't get it, so she fell back on her comfort state of mind. "Friend" she drooled.
"Silentium!"
A big blue bubble suddenly sprouted from the end of her hand and enveloped a few cradillos who happened to be nearby. Cora turned to Moonmist.
"Moonmist," Cora said in an uncharacteristically commanding tone, "I need you to stay in the bubble and keep the cradillos there, or else they'll get loose and spooked again. There's no sound in the bubble, so you'll have to use telepathy."
…That's the only way I can talk. Moonmist reminded her.
"Right. So, just make soothing noises so they stay."
Roger. Moonmist attended to his duty without question.
"Wow…when the going gets tough, you two stop acting like an old married couple." Bridgit raised her eyebrows. "It's nice to see you can be serious."
"Yeah…hey! Look, we don't have time for semantics!" Cora snapped.
"I'm not quite sure that was used in the proper context…"
"Shut up dictionary girl!" Bridgit put away her dictionary in shame. "We have more important things to do than semantics!"
Bridgit shook her head, but held her tongue. They both suddenly turned as Hagrid yelled,
"Bear hug of paralyzing love!" He scooped up five cradillos and began coddling them. "I've go' these five, yeh take care o' the rest." Hagrid called out to them.
"Right! Thanks for your contribution…" Cora muttered, looking at the twenty or so other rampaging animals.
"We must find a way to…placate them." Bridgit said.
"What the- put away your thesaurus! It's not the time for that one either!"
"Awww…" Bridgit looked downcast.
"Look, they absorb magic, right? So we need to use indirect spells and-" Hermione, who was trying to explain the strategy to Replacement Crabbe, realized who she was talking to. "I'm sorry, sometimes I talk to people and don't care who to. You guys!" Hermione turned to Bridgit and Cora.
"Way ahead of you!" Cora called back. "Go round up other students to help!"
"Right!" Hermione left to go do so.
"Okay!" Bridgit grinned, jogging through the very large pen.
They came upon a group of cradillos attacking some random students to the point where they cowered up in a tree for safety.
"You guys! Use indirect magic!" Cora yelled to them.
"AHHHHHH! We're going to die!" One of them screamed.
"Never mind." Cora sighed.
"No! Indirect magic! Like this!" Bridgit responded. "Vitis laqueus!"
Vines sprouted from the ground and wrapped gently, but restrainingly, around the rampaging cradillos, holding them firmly in place and rendering them immobile.
"Whoa! Good idea! Let's go find more panicked-to-the-state-of-stupid people to save!" Cora clapped her hands together. "Then they'll have to accept us!"
"Wait a minute!" Bridgit had a sudden, nasty realization, "Where's Harry?"
They looked in horror at each other.
"Oh no! If he gets killed by a bunch of rampaging sheep monsters, Sammy'll boil us alive!" Cora groaned.
"Bloody hell!" They heard being yelled from afar.
They looked at each other again.
"Ron!" They exclaimed at the same time.
"Where he is…"
"…Harry will be!"
They ran towards where they figured the sound had come from, but were having little success finding them until Bridgit decided it might be prudent to yell at them to get them to respond.
"Harry! Ron! Where are you?" She called at the top of her lungs.
"We're here!" Came a muffled, but none too happy-sounding reply.
"They sound like they're in trouble!" Cora noted tensely.
Breaking through into a clearing surrounded by lofty trees, because there are trees in the pen because the pen is so big, they beheld a pulsating mass of cradillos.
"You don't suppose…"
"Help!" Came two muffled voices from within the pile, affirming Cora's horrible suspicion.
"There's so many of them and in a concentrated area. What could have caused them to single out Harry and Ron out of all the other unimportant people?" Bridgit wondered aloud.
"Must be karma." Cora snickered.
"We should probably help them now."
"To action!" Cora held up her arms. "Vitis laqueus!"
More vines sprang from the ground and managed to snag and hold a few of the cradillos, but the swarm was too large and pulsating to get a good grip on most of them.
"It's not working! This will take too long." Cora growled.
"What should we do? I'm fresh out of ideas after my last Hermione excuse."
"Well…where brain fails, we turn to the superior brawn." Cora flexed her arm. "I'll toss them out, you keep them from coming back."
She then entered the melee and grabbed a cradillos by the tail and tried to pull it, but it was too heavy to move. Frustrated, Cora grabbed the squirming creature around the middle and hefted it up. She leaned backwards with the effort, as it was quite heavy.
"No, no!" Bridgit called from the sidelines. "You have to lift with your legs not your back!"
"Shut up!" Cora yelled, grunting as she threw the cradillos beyond the clearing.
The cradillos' fall was cushioned by its fluffy wool. It then promptly turned around and tried to charge back into the clearing. Bridgit stood before it, crouching a bit, with her arms ready to grab it.
"You're not going anywhere." She grinned.
The cradillos ran directly into her, knocking the wind from her lungs and ran over her to get back into the pile.
"Okay…" she gasped. "Plan B." She recovered her voice. "Cora I need a plan B!"
"I'm a little busy right now! If it's not working, then let's get Harry and Ron out of the pile! Get in here and help me out."
"Right."
Bridgit dove into the pile, very uncomfortable by the pushing and pulling going on around her, not to mention the crushing. She held her breath and pushed her way further in, squirming to try and reach Harry. Her success was rewarded when a head of messy black hair came into view. Without a second thought, she reached out and grabbed it. Pulling him by the hair a little ways, she popped her head out the top of the pile.
"I found him! Get over here! I can't exactly pull him out by his hair!"
Cora, with great difficulty, waded through to where Bridgit was as Bridgit struggled to keep a grip on Harry's hair.
"Owwww!" Harry screamed.
"Don't worry! We're going to save you!" Cora answered.
"Let go of my hair."
"No dice." Bridgit scowled.
They pushed themselves further into the middle of the pile and managed to find his arms (attached to his body, naturally). Taking one a piece, they fought their way back out through the swarm, being stepped on, bitten and gouged. Finally, after an indeterminable amount of time, they broke free of the mass and could smell the fresh air. Exhausted, they all collapsed to the ground.
"Mission….accomplished." Bridgit panted.
"Your hair's standing up." Cora giggled.
"Oh yeah." Bridgit laughed.
They gave each other a high five, but received a nasty static shock in the process. Harry sat up, his hair all mussed up and his glasses crooked on his face, and pointed a bloody hand to the pile.
"What about Ron?" He asked.
Bridgit and Cora looked at each other.
"Oh yeah…him." Cora sighed.
Bridgit turned to Cora. "Shall we?"
"Yes. Let's."
The three of them dove back into the pile, mercilessly shoving their way to the centre, where Ron was. Getting a firm grasp, they tried to excavate Ron from his cradillos tomb, but to no avail.
"They keep swarming him!" Cora growled.
"But why?" Bridgit wondered.
"What should we do?" Harry asked in alarm.
He then received a very nasty shock.
"Ow! I hate wool! I always got those stupid wool sweater hand-me-downs from my aunt and uncle and they're itchy and they have terrible static and stick to all of my undershirts and they smell bad and-" Harry continued on his tirade, ignored by Bridgit as she suddenly had an epiphany.
"Cora! I know what to do!" She exclaimed.
"Great Odin's ravens protect us all." Cora uttered in horror.
"Oh, you're such a drama queen! You two protect Ron, I'll be right back." She then struggled out of the pile.
"Wait! Where are you going?" Cora called after her to no avail.
She stood for a moment. "Well…what else are we gonna do?" She sighed.
"-and they were horrible colours like orange and pea-green and mauve and shiny…" Harry continued, obviously releasing pent-up rage.
Free from the cradillos, Bridgit spoke.
"Linamentum fustis!"
Blue electricity hit several trees, turning them an odd shade of yellow. Bridgit grinned.
"I never thought I'd be saying this, but thank you Harry!"
"For what?" Harry asked from the agglomeration of animals.
"For giving her the idea…you know…like a muse."
"I amuse her? Damn, now you both have a fancy for me." Harry sighed. "I'm just hot stuff."
The cradillos closest to the trees were picked up by an unseen force and were then stuck against the trunks.
"Get the cradillos close to the trees!" Bridgit yelled, shoving one forwards so that it was sucked towards the tree.
"Right!" The other two acknowledged.
The cradillos were determined to stay where they were, but, pushing with all their might, they managed to force a few towards the trees. The rest continued killing Ron.
"It's not enough! We're too weak!" Harry wailed.
"I guess we need a little fire-power. God, you're useful today!" Cora grinned, cashing in on her muse.
From her belt, she removed a small phial containing a dark purple liquid.
"This is the last one." She muttered. "I've gotta steal some more…but Snape wouldn't have any because he doesn't value physical fitness."
She tossed her head back and gulped the potion down in one shot. Her muscles swelled and increased in size as she started to glow. She grinned.
"It's hero time!"
Bridgit sighed at Cora's poor battle chant. Cora, now super buff and glowing, picked up the nearest cradillos and tossed it with considerably less effort towards the trees. Running through the pile, she picked up the rest of the strays, who were now held fast to the trees.
"I don't understand…" Harry stared at Cora in bewilderment.
"It's a hero potion! It increases my speed and strength…and I glow!" Cora smiled. "Although, it's killer on clothes, so that's why mine are stretchy!"
"Why didn't you use one earlier when you were being attacked in the forest?" Harry asked.
"The potion makes the user extremely altruistic, which creates the tendency of self-endangerment when others are around. So, the potion must be used strategically, where self-sacrifice will not result in death. They're damn useful, though." Cora sighed.
"You should have taken yours like I took mine!" Bridgit smiled.
"I wouldn't consider going out to get a pizza heroic." Cora muttered.
"It was when there were thirty pizzas!" Bridgit giggled.
"Ron!" Harry turned to his fallen comrade.
"Bloody hell." Ron groaned.
He was in sorry shape. He was all bloodied and bruised, with a broken leg to boot.
"I guess it's another trip to the infirmary." Cora sighed.
"Yay! It's chocolate Tuesday!" Bridgit cheered.
"Let's just go." Cora muttered, helping Ron to his feet as Harry supported him from the other side.
"Or was it Thursdays…" Bridgit wondered aloud. "Oh well. Follow me! I have an innate sense of direction."
On the way back, they became aware of a metallic banging noise. They turned their heads to find…
"Neville! Are you okay?" Bridgit asked, spying him sitting on top of a wash bin.
"Yes…yes." Neville sighed.
BANG! BANG! BANG! Something struck against the sides of the wash bin, forcing them outwards.
"Ummm…what's up with your wash bin?" Cora asked.
"Well…after that sound, Chester started getting dangerously agitated, so I quickly tipped over the wash bin and trapped him underneath by sitting on it."
They looked at him in astonishment.
"Neville…that's absolutely brilliant!" Bridgit exclaimed.
"Die in a fire. My leg is broken! Stop shooting the breeze and get me some medical attention!" Ron thought he said. But it came out as:
"Urrrgghhh."
"R-really?" Neville looked surprised as they all took Ron's moan of suffering as a sign of agreement.
"It was less complicated than our ideas. It reflects the age-old code of the hero." Cora smiled, flexing her buff face muscles.
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Wow! I've never been the best at anything!" Neville cried for joy. "Except for herbology." He added, "Although that's because I'm the only one who waters the plants because I have nothing to do." His voice trailed off.
"Anyway, we have to go now. Bye." Cora muttered as they hastily retreated onto their original path. She feared the friendship of others.
Later at the infirmary, where it was marzipan Tuesday, Harry, Bridgit and Cora were seated around Ron's bed, out of concern and nothing better to do respectively. The silence was broken by the sound of hasty footsteps. Hermione bustled into the room and headed straight for Ron. Taking his hand in hers, she said,
"Ron! Are you okay? I got here as soon as I heard."
"Y-yeah…I'm okay. Something like that can't faze me for too long." Ron grinned awkwardly, blushing.
Hermione realized her rash action and quickly dropped his hand.
"Right. Well then. What I want to know is why they were all swarming and attacking you." She pondered. "Do you kick them at night or something?"
"No! Of course not!" Ron sighed in exasperation.
"But then why?"
"Ummm…I'm unwilling to explain." Ron's face turned a deeper shade of red.
Harry sighed, "It's probably his cheap cologne."
"Harry! You broke the pact!" Ron stammered.
"What are you talking about? That pact was about where you got those socks." Harry gestured towards Ron's feet.
"Where did you get cologne in the middle of school?" Cora wondered aloud.
"…Fred and George. They said it was love cologne."
"Love cologne?" Everyone looked at him incredulously.
"Erm! I mean, manly cologne!" Ron laughed nervously.
"You do realize that's not really any better than the last name." Bridgit whispered to him.
His pride was spared by the entrance of Hagrid, followed by Dumbledore.
"Harry, Ron, Hermione, Bridgit, Cora." Hagrid nodded to acknowledge them all. "A' righ' Ron?"
"Yeah. I'm okay." Ron smiled, his face returning to a normal colour.
"It's not your fault, Hagrid. Remember the evidence we found. It is the fault of some unknown third party… Coughcoughmalfoycoughcough! Ahem. Excuse me. I am fighting off a cold."
"I know, bu' I still feel bad." Hagrid sighed.
"I'm fine, Hagrid, don't worry!" Ron reassured him.
"Oh, I wasn't goin' on abou' tha'. I'm jus' worried abou' my poor little cradillos. They were so spooked." Hagrid sniffed, looking remorseful.
"What exactly happened?" Hermione, ever wanting to know everything, asked.
"Ah, that is quite interesting." Dumbledore said, reaching into his robes. "You see: this is the cause of the panic."
He took out a shell-like object that was broken into pieces. Clearly it had once been able to produce some kind of sound.
"Of course! That's a bewitched predator shell. When you blow into it, it produces the cry of the natural predator of the animal it is closest to. Ancient hunters used it to run things off cliffs." Hermione smiled.
"Very good, Ms. Grainger!" Dumbledore clapped his hands in delight, "You get a gold star."
He handed her a shiny little star. Hermione took it, smiling broadly, and then put it in a little sack full of gold stars.
"In this case it produced the call of the linamentum praedatorius. I get it!" Bridgit grinned.
"That's a first." Cora muttered.
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
"Wha' I wan' teh know is how you two managed to catch all the rest of 'em." Hagrid looked pensive, his massive brow furrowed in concentration.
"Well, I got the idea from Harry's sweater complex." Everyone looked confused, "So I realized that, since they have wool and were all rubbing against each other, they were now statically charged by the transfer of ions." Bridgit began.
"Yes…of course. I-ons." Everyone still looked confused.
"So, I knew that if I created some charged objects, I could use the force of induction by making it the opposite net charge of the cradillos to trap them. Since no magical forces could affect them, I decided to use the force of PHYSICS!" Bridgit began doing muscle physics poses and grrring.
"Ummm…you mean you made static cling?" Hermione ventured.
"Yes…" Bridgit deflated at this simplified explanation.
"Ah! I see you've been doin' some extra research!" Hagrid beamed.
"What?" No one had a clue what he was talking about.
"You see, that's similar to the way the linamentum praedatorius attack the cradillos. They have naturally evolved to have an opposite charge, so when they come into contact with the cradillos, they stick like glue. Tha's why they were gettin' so riled up: once they're caught, there's no escape." Hagrid smiled warmly during his morbid lecture.
"Very good, Miss Firecatcher, you get a gold star!" Dumbledore reached into his robes again and handed her one.
"Umm…thanks…" Bridgit forced a smile, not sure of what to do with it.
She finally decided to bite it and see if it was really made out of gold.
"Ack! It's paper!" She spat it out. "I mean…I will treasure it always." And she put it in her pocket.
Hermione silently seethed with jealousy.
"We'd best be off, as Mr. Weasley is about to have a visit from his parents." Dumbledore explained, heading towards the door in wake of Hagrid.
"How did they find out so fast?" Ron wondered aloud.
"Cora, yeh' look righ' shiny t'day." Hagrid ventured.
"Nature just recognizes my innate greatness and has created special air molecules to go around me that are shiny." Cora puffed up with pride.
"Tha's righ' impressive." Hagrid frowned in giant befuddlement.
"Com aong, Hagrid. There's work to be done." Dumbledore coaxed him from the room with candy.
"Of course. Farewell everyone!" Hagrid left, certain that Queen's English would yield even more candy.
Only moments later, the Weasleys burst into the room like a balloon of familial love. Awwww. Mrs. Weasley jogged up to the bed.
"Oh my little Ronnykins! I was so worried! Did the evil baby sheep things hurt you?" She stroked his head.
"Y-yeah mom…could you maybe let go of me?" He asked, turning red from parental embarrassment in front of his friends.
"Oh. Sorry, love!" She turned to Bridgit and Cora. "Wait a moment…Ron only has two friends. Who are you?"
"I'm Bridgit Firecatcher." Bridgit shook her hand.
"I'm Cora Willowstaff." Cora shook her hand as well.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Firecracker and Miss Willowsap. I'm Ron's mother, Molly Dolly Weasley." She paused. "My mother didn't like me much." She offered an explanation for her middle name.
"Well, Harry, I guess we have you to thank for our son's well being, per usual." Mr. Weasley clapped him on the shoulder.
"Actually, sir, it was them." Harry pointed at Bridgit and Cora.
"Oh! Miss Firecracker, Miss Willowsap! How ever can we thank you!" Mrs. Weasley gave them both a big hug. "My husband Arthur and I worried so much when the clock said he was in mortal peril!"
"And we're so happy that our son has made more friends." Mr. Weasley beamed. "Four! That's a new record for the boys in our family!"
"Dad…I have more than four friends."
"Shhhh…quiet, dear. The grown-ups are talking." Mrs. Weasley told him gently.
Ron's face turned red with indignation. Boo-urns!
"If you'll excuse us, Harry, Hermione, Bridgit and Cora, we'd like to spend some quality time with our son. We brought him chocolates, flowers and get well cards from all the neighbours." Mrs. Weasley explained.
"Oh, right. No problem!" The four left.
"The neighbours know?" Ron's voice traveled through the infirmary.
"Of course, dear. They're our neighbours."
"Well, I guess we'd better go study!" Hermione smiled.
"Oh my gosh! I left my notes in the field!" Cora exclaimed.
"Oh, you gotta be kidding me. Well, I'll help you find them because then it will take you less time." Bridgit offered.
"We'll help too! More hands make lighter work." Hermione smiled.
"Oh, we couldn't ask that of you, Hermione! If you waste your precious study time, your grades could slip!" Cora cried.
"You're right! Thank you, Cora. You're a true friend."
"Darn tootin'!"
"Ummm, maybe I should help too-"
"Come, Harry!" Hermione interrupted him, dragging the poor guy down the hallway.
"Awww…" Bridgit moaned when Harry and Hermione were out of earshot. "Now I have to think of an excuse."
Echoing down the hallway, they could still hear Ron's parents doting on their child and his embarrassed responses.
"I don't see why he's so embarrassed. It's nice to have a family." Bridgit muttered.
"Pfft! Whatever! Families are over-rated. I mean, we didn't have families and look how we turned out!" She spread her arms wide.
The two paused to actually think about that statement.
"Well, you know what I mean." Cora finished.
"Still, his parents are nice." Bridgit smiled.
"Yeah. Even if they can't remember our names." Cora continued.
"Crap! We have an orphan complex like Harry! I know how to fix this: we'll steal them!" Bridgit suggested.
Any further conversation was interrupted by Sammy and Reagan, who were running down the hallway.
"Bridgit! Cora! Are you two okay?" Reagan cried, out of breath.
"Bridgit! Cora! Is Harry okay?" Sammy asked in alarm as the pair stopped by Bridgit and Cora.
Reagan punched himself in the face. "Sammy, I punched myself to make a point. Every time you hate on Bridgit and Cora, you hurt me inside."
"Don't hurt yourself in the name of these freaks! I mean…look, they're obviously fine. I didn't want to demean them by assuming they were injured." she patted them on the head. "They're tough cookies! Nothing lady-like about 'em. Harry on the other hand…"
"Wow. Sammy just challenged our femininity." Bridgit commented.
"And yet, I don't really care." Cora added.
Sammy could sense the danger and wisely shut up.
"You two have her trained so well!" Reagan tittered.
"Ahem! Well, good job guys! If the school gossip is accurate, you protected Harry and his stupid friend well. Congratulations." She grinned.
The two held out their hands, wanting a gold star apiece. Sammy looked at the two for a moment, not sure what was expected of her.
"What? You want a tip?" She asked incredulously. "You know we're a child-labour organization. We don't get paid!"
"Well, if everyone's okay, do you want to go poke the giant squid in the lake?" Reagan asked.
"Well, we can't. We have transfiguration next." Bridgit sighed.
"Coughcough-keener-cough!" Cora coughed. "I seem to have caught Dumbledore's cold."
"Didn't you hear?" Reagan asked.
"What?"
"The rest of the day's classes have been canceled while there is an investigation over the incident. The son of an influential member of the Ministry of Magic has declared Hagrid incapable of teaching, so they're trying to find out what caused this whole mess. Apparently something like this happened two years ago, surprisingly enough from the same kid, but nothing happened, so I think that this thing'll blow over." Sammy smiled.
"I'll bet it's Malfoy." Bridgit giggled.
"Yeah! Bottom totally kicked his ass!" Cora laughed.
"We don't want to know." Sammy shook her head.
"Let's go have fun!" Reagan smiled.
And they ran off to go poke the squid.
Back in the cradillos enclosure, Moonmist sat on top of Aluicious' head telling bedtime stories to the cradillos that were in the bubble.
And then the genie said, ''sup yo! How's it goin' my homies?' He paused to survey his flock, realizing they were all asleep.
Wow. That was surprisingly simple. But when is someone going to tell me what's going on?
