New Year, New Life: Chapter 7
Entrance Exams
``Um... Shizuru,'' said Natsuki, looking up from her studies at her girlfriends apartment one day. ``It's getting close to the end of the year for you, and I wanted to make sure I'm not bothering you by coming here every day now ...well almost every day. I really don't want to interfere with your studies.'' The smile this earned her from Shizuru brought a little color to her cheeks, so she continued. ``I really do appreciate your letting me study here like this.''
``Of course you're not,'' Shizuru laughed happily. ``You know I love your company ...any time.'' Her quiet voice was filled with sincere happiness. ``And please don't worry about hindering my studies. You don't.'' She cocked her head, remembering. ``Did I ever tell you that last year, before you helped me with my nightmares, I was have trouble concentrating and getting my work done. ...You cured that.'' Now was Shizuru's turn to blush. ``I don't know why, but I found I was able to concentrate better with you sitting here at the table with me. Isn't it funny? You can be very distracting, Natsuki, yet your quiet presence also helps me concentrate.'' A thought popped into Shizuru's mind and a concerned look crossed her face. ``But Natsuki, please don't feel you have to come here just so I can concentrate. You have your own room now, and perhaps you find you can study better there. I don't want to be a distraction to you. Your big exams will be coming up soon, and I want you to do well on them, so if giving up your company can help...'' Shizuru trailed off, looking back up at Natsuki, hope and fear competing in her eyes.
Natsuki's face had gone through several shades of red while Shizuru made her explanation and confession, and her emerald eyes were glistening as she looked back at her.
``Shizuru, I... I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same way.'' She took a breath. ``I've tried studying in my room and... and I just can't concentrate. I... I... I just kept thinking of you; I kept telling myself I needed to learn to concentrate by myself so I wouldn't bother you; kept telling myself it was better that way.'' She said this last in a rush and her blush came back full force. In a quiet, honest voice, she concluded, ``...but I missed you.''
Shizuru looked back, her eyes also showing how full her heart was. ``Natsuki, love, thank you.'' She reached across the table and her hand met Natsuki's which was also reaching out to her. ``Thank you... Thank you for helping me, and even more for letting me help you. Please, come here anytime. ...all the time if you'd like. But please, never, ever, think you're a bother.''
``OK. Thanks dear,'' said Natsuki. ``I will.''
So they did almost all of their studying together from this point on. A few weeks later, Natsuki's college entrance exams drew close.
``Natsuki,'' asked Shizuru before they began their last study session before the first test, ``how are things going for you on this test?''
``Well, this studying with you has really helped, but...'' Natsuki blushed. ``But could I ask you a big favor?''
``Of course, love. Anything.''
``Well, I need to be rested and relaxed for this test so... so could I... could I sleep here together with you tonight? I mean just sleep. I can't think of anyplace more reassuring and relaxing than in your arms.''
It was Shizuru's turn to blush. ``Of course, my love. Of course.'' She came round the table, gave Natsuki a big hug and a kiss on her head. Shizuru thought that this simple request was one of the biggest compliments Natsuki had paid her. It showed that she not only fully trusted her, but felt that a restful night together would actually help her in the test. She resolved to do everything she could to make it so for Natsuki, for she knew this test was extremely important to her.
.
Next morning Shizuru woke up laying in her bed with Natsuki cradled in her arms. During the night, Natsuki had barely moved, except to snuggle closer and snake an arm over Shizuru to pull her close. While she looked at Natsuki's peaceful, sleeping face, Shizuru thought of last night. Natsuki had stayed up late—but not too late—studying, and when she was finally done, they both got ready for bed. They climbed in and Natsuki quickly cuddled up in a position Shizuru found both irresistibly cute and comfortable for herself as well. A relaxed and trusting Natsuki lay enfolded tenderly in her arms. They both fell asleep after only a short while of whispering sweet nothings to each other. No, thought Shizuru, that hackneyed phrase is wrong. While they unquestionably were sweet, their mutual declarations of happiness and love were anything but nothings: they were some of the most important and deepest truths either had spoken.
But, the sun was starting to climb above the horizon, so Shizuru began with a few kisses. ``Natsuki. Natsuki, it's time to wake up, my love.''
Natsuki opened her eyes, returned the good morning kiss and slowly put the rest of her brain in gear. ``Thank you, dearest. That's gotta be the best night's sleep I've had in... since the last time with you.''
They shared a happy laugh over this, and got up to dress and make breakfast together.
When they finished eating, Shizuru glanced over at the clock. ``Natsuki, let me take care of the dishes today.''
``But...''
``But...'' Shizuru contradicted, her voice gentle. ``You wanted to be relaxed for your exam today, so don't try to help with the dishes only to have to rush to your exam.'' She looked over to Natsuki as they each carried their dishes to the sink. ``Please.''
``OK.'' Natsuki sighed. ``Thanks.'' She rested her hand on Shizuru's arm and laid a grateful head on her shoulder for a few moments.
Natsuki got her bag and Shizuru met her at the door. She gave Natsuki a big hug and a kiss. ``For luck,'' she explained, straightening Natsuki's uniform that she had mussed.
They looked into each other's eyes for a bit before Natsuki answered, ``Thank you. I'll do my best.'' Then silently added, for you, before reluctantly heading to her bike and riding off to her exam.
.
``How do you feel it went?'' asked Shizuru when Natsuki returned that evening.
``Not too bad, I guess. Of course I won't know for sure until the results come out.''
``I'm sure you did well,'' Shizuru countered with a smile. She wasn't just trying to cheer up her girlfriend. She'd seen how keen Natsuki's intellect was, and had confidence she really would do well.
``If you say so.''
This set the pattern for the rest of the week. The two would share dinner and studying, and then spend a very contented, restful night together in each other's arms.
The next week, Natsuki met Shizuru at the entrance to Fuuka University.
``Good afternoon, Natsuki.''
``Afternoon, Shizuru,'' Natsuki responded as the two headed into campus. ``Thanks for meeting me here and...'' She trailed off into embarrassed mumbles.
``You're welcome.'' A sincere smile graced Shizuru's features. ``I understand.''
Natsuki nodded in silent acknowledgment, again grateful that her girlfriend's perceptiveness made up for her lack of eloquence. Still, she was nervous and grew more apprehensive as they neared their destination. She wondered how she could have made this walk without Shizuru's supportive presence.
The two made their way through the crowd to a spot where they could read the posted exam results. Shizuru unerringly grasped the hand Natsuki held out to her and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
The two scanned the boards together, whispering numbers as they looked.
``4329, 4341, 4350...''
``4400, 4395, 4384...''
``4370!'' they cried out together.
``You made it. Congratulations Natsuki.'' said Shizuru as they turned from the boards to embrace each other. ``I knew you would. I'm so proud of you.''
``Thanks, dear,'' Natsuki whispered in her ear. ``You really helped me.'' Her eyes lit up as the reality of her passing the entrance exams sank in. ``Now I'll be able to join you here at Fuuka University. I really wanted to be able to.''
``I'm really glad you will, but did I really help any? It's your intelligence, work and determination that got you here.''
``Yes, you did. Remember all our studying together? That helped.'' Natsuki buried her face in Shizuru's hair and quietly added, ``And then there was motivation. You know I'd do anything to be with you.''
``I know.'' Shizuru tightened her embrace. ``And that just makes me love you more,'' she continued in a voice only Natsuki could hear.
They stood here like this for a while, savoring each other's closeness and the scent of their hair, and sharing their joy in Natsuki's accomplishment. They finally loosened their grasp on each other, turned and walked off together with an easy familiarity born of close and long association which kept them in perfect step without need for a single word.
.
Arriving back at the gate, Natsuki gestured to her bike and asked, ``Should we go straight home, or do you have somewhere you'd like to go? Or do you need to go do something on campus?''
``Anywhere with you, love,'' was Shizuru's immediate answer, earning her a mild blush from Natsuki. She still enjoyed this cute response, but it warmed her heart far more every time Natsuki referred to Shizuru's apartment as ``home,'' even when it was ambiguous whether or not Natsuki meant it was her own home as well as Shizuru's. ``Maybe we should do something to celebrate.''
``Yeah,'' said Natsuki. ``That'd be fun. What d'ya wanna do?''
``It's your acceptance we're celebrating. What do you want?''
They both thought for a bit.
``Oh,'' exclaimed Shizuru. ``I just realized what today's date is.'' When Natsuki looked at her, trying to bring her mind back from the test results, she ventured, ``Would you like to go tell your mother?''
``Oh, right,'' said Natsuki realizing that today was her mother's birthday. Her expression turned to one of shock, then embarrassment as she realized she had been so focused on making it into Fuuka to be with Shizuru that it had crowded her mother's birthday from her consciousness. She wished she had remembered, but Shizuru had done so for her. With this thought, her expression smoothed to one of gentle happiness. ``Yeah. I'd like that. We could go tell her together, if you don't mind.''
``I'd love to.'' Shizuru accompanied her answer with a sincere and loving smile.
So, instead of going back to Shizuru's apartment, the two got onto Natsuki's bike and headed to a florist in town. Shizuru followed Natsuki in and also bought a bouquet. On their way out, Natsuki cocked an inquisitive eyebrow her direction.
``I'd like to give your mother something this year as well.'' Shizuru smiled back. ``And I also have a couple things I'd like to tell her.''
``Sure ...thanks.'' Natsuki blushed a bit, grateful for Shizuru's simple acceptance of her little rituals. Others might have called them silly, but she need never worry that Shizuru would.
They rode out of town, down the seaside road. Shizuru sat behind Natsuki, holding on to her tightly. Her mind went back to this time last year when Natsuki first told her of her mother and brought her here. This time, though, she was confident in her tight embrace of Natsuki; she knew it wouldn't be interpreted wrongly; Natsuki knew her feelings of love, and better yet, accepted and returned them. It make her even happier to know Natsuki enjoyed being held like this as much as she enjoyed doing the holding. And with the helmet-intercom from Natsuki's Christmas present, they were able to tell each other this.
They soon arrived at the pull-off and Natsuki parked the bike. They walked to the guardrail together where they both threw their bouquets into the surf below and bowed for a silent prayer. When they finished, they looked up and joined hands.
``Mother,'' began Natsuki, as she looked out over the ocean. ``I brought Shizuru back again this year.'' Her face relaxed, showing this simple fact was something important she wanted to say. ``I want you to know I passed my entrance exams for Fuuka University; I'll be able to go there with Shizuru. She really helped me with them, and so much more. She's done so much for me. I've told you how she loves me. ...I've found I love her too, the same way. She's made me so happy. I hope you're happy too.'' She took a deep breath and glanced at Shizuru. ``She's the best thing that's ever happened to me.''
When Natsuki paused and squeezed Shizuru's hand to go ahead, she did, hesitantly. ``Kuga-han...'' She shook her head almost imperceptibly and started over. ``Mother... I... I want to thank you for Natsuki. Thank you for raising her to be the wonderful woman she's become.'' This brought a fierce blush to Natsuki's face. ``I wish you were here so I could meet you and thank you in person. But you're not. So please rest easy knowing I will always care for—and take care of—and love—Natsuki.'' She closed her eyes, bowed her head, tightened her grip on Natsuki's hand and finished, ``Thank you, mother.''
Natsuki drew Shizuru close, dropping her hand so she could put her arm around Shizuru's waist. Shizuru returned the gesture. Natsuki continued, ``Mother, I really wish you were here to meet Shizuru. But still, could you please...'' She took a deep breath, and drew strength from Shizuru's closeness. ``Could you please give us your blessing. You always wanted me to be happy, and with her I truly am. And I... I want to spend the rest of my life with her.''
As she said this, their heads leaned closer until they rested tenderly against each other. A clean wind arose from the sea, bringing a hint of warmth as it caressed their cheeks, blowing their hair out behind them mingling raven with chestnut, as if it came in answer bringing with it consent and blessing.
The two stood there a bit longer, staring out at the setting sun, letting the breeze and the sound of the ocean bring them calm and courage.
``Natsuki?'' Shizuru finally ventured, tightening her grip on Natsuki's waist, then taking a breath. ``Do you really mean that? ...the rest of your life? Because if you do...''
Natsuki nodded imperceptibly and returned Shizuru's grasp. ``Yes, my love, I do. Would you...'' She trailed off, her voice too full of emotion to finish, but trusting Shizuru to know what she was trying to say, what she was proposing.
Shizuru turned to face Natsuki. ``Yes! Ten thousand times yes,'' she answered, pouring all of her heart into her voice. ``That's been my fondest dream for... for it doesn't matter how long, since I want to stay with you forever, if you'll have me.''
Natsuki looked back straight into her eyes, through both of their flowing tears, and opened her heart. ``I do. I love you. I want to share my life with you. I... I can no longer imagine life without you.''
Their kiss lasted until the sun set.
Author's Note:
After I finished this chapter, I noticed that I'd introduced a continuity error compared to the Mai-Hime canon. I inadvertently placed Natsuki only one year behind Shizuru in school, not the two she actually is. To follow the canonical timeline, Natsuki would spend 2 years in high school without Shizuru, not the one I wrote here. Given how some reviewers complimented my slow pacing in Rebirth, I find it ironic that I'm rushing things here. But it just didn't seem to flow right to have Shizuru and Natsuki wait another year to reach this point. And this difference is far less than most AU changes anyway. So, rather than go back and rewrite everything, I'm going to just leave things the way they are and beg forgiveness.
