And here it is! the new chapter :P :) ugh, this took me hours. so be thankful. ;) lol we are getting close to some big moments in Alice and Jasper's life... :P

well, i dont own twilight (sadly) and Alice and Jazz arent my creations (double sadly)

but, all in all,

here you go.


Alice's winsome, incandescent, beaming-yet slightly impish and malevolent smile faded quickly into a harsh line that made her perfect skin crease into tiny lines shadowing her mouth. She rolled off of me, and I felt coldness inside my heart. I yearned for her closeness. She moved elegantly to the edge of the bed, letting her legs dangle and kick the covers.

Alice's bubbly, happy voice had become timid, and nervous, "Alright, my turn to speak." Her little head turned to face me, and she was biting her bright red lips. I scooted to her side, using my power to bring her a sense of calm. It wouldn't be much, but I wanted to help her in any way possible. As I landed at her side, Alice reached for me, and grabbed my right arm, pulling it over to her, dragging me along with it. As I was getting closer, I saw Alice's scared eyes turn lighter, and her smile began creeping around the corners of her fairytale lips. I pulled my arm free from her, and as quickly as possible, I placed it back on her waist, pulling her up on to my lap. Screw holding back, I give up. I wanted Alice close, and I would hold her as long as I wanted. Give her whatever she craved. I would make this angel happy, no matter what it took. Alice was my savior; I owed her anything and everything. The least I could do was giving her the comfort of my touch. Her tiny frame folded into the shape of my body, and her knees came up, as she cradled herself into a comfortable position in my arms. Alice's head was lying on my shoulder, and as I wrapped my arms tighter around her, hugging her close, smelling her invigorating scent (cinnamon and French vanilla) she laughed, and I felt the vibrations of voice on my skin.

The little angel I was holding came to life as she traced my scars, making patterns with her fingernails on my rock hard skin. Her skin was ice cold, but as hot as burning coals at the same time. It made me ache, it made me scream internally. It hit me hard, and I had never felt a need this strong since I was first changed.

The three women were beautiful, more graceful than I had ever seen. They drew me in, and as I got closer they just seemed to get more beautiful. There was a blonde, and two brunettes. The shorter brunette was by far the most beautiful, and had positioned herself I n front, obviously the leader. I went to give them my aid, prove myself worthy for their protection.

"Jazz, you were hurt, weren't you? It might not have been physically, but you were…in pain." Alice cringed as she spoke, and I held her, just begging that this comfort was enough for her. This was hurting her, and her pain was seeping into my core, making me want to burst out into a crying fit, and throw a tantrum, it made me want to cover my ears and make her stop. I knew it hurt her, but I knew where she was heading, and things were bound to get worse. She attempted to hide her pain, and continued speaking. "That day, when you met-

"Maria." The 'leader' of the women spoke as she walked forward to greet me, I pulled my horse along beside me, but the blonde girl grabbed the reins from my hand, and petted the stallion gently. The taller of the brunettes walked forward and whispered lightly in Maria's ear. I could not hear what she was saying, but the devilish smile on her face made me feel as though these girls weren't as sweet as they appeared. "What is your name?" Maria asked me. Her voice was dipped in a Mexican accent, but the color of her skin suggested otherwise. "Major Jasper Whitlock Ma'am." I took off my hat- out of reflex-and I slightly nodded my head towards the beautiful woman. I felt myself shiver as the ice cold skin of the blonde woman tickled my skin. She stopped behind Maria, and spoke in the softest voice I had ever heard. "A major? Nice…you better do it Maria, I can never stop once I start." She smiled, and her bright white teeth had a slight tint of red on them… my heart pounded. I was not safe. My instincts told me to run, but my heart begged and pleaded to stay. "Yes, do it now Maria." The other of the woman pleaded as Maria stalked forwards. I began to sweat as I noticed the color of her eyes…blood red. She was no normal human; she did not need my help… I must get away, I must run! But, I couldn't move. I was hypnotized by her beauty…the way she moved, her scent… "I do hope you will survive Major, you shall be of great use to me…" Maria smiled, and I took a small step backwards, scared of her words. Her hands grabbed my wrists, and I tried to pull away, but Maria was holding me there, her strength more accumulated than any wild animal. She slowly tilted her chin upwards, as if to kiss me, and then let go of my hand, as she ran her thin fingers threw my hair… I was captivated… it all moved so quickly from there. One moment I was being held by Maria, and the next I felt her teeth sink in to my skin as I bellowed in pain.

Maria, you had gotten a notice, hadn't you?" my mind unfocused from my little Alice, and refocused on a cloudy memory from my past…Yes, I had gotten a notice…it was the best moment of my life. I had been deemed as off duty for the weekend, to go see my mother, because she was ill. I had seen her a month earlier, and that last visit had gone…not as expected. I had been talked to again, because of my lack of marital status. My mother had ended the visit by shoving her grandmother's wedding ring in my front pocket. Now, as I remember this, it seems foolish. Yet, I could feel the ring burning in my pocket, from where it has never left. This visit was to be a goodbye visit…she was to be dead within weeks. I nodded; I felt the sting of water flash over my eyes… "To see my mother." My voice was stuck in my throat and I had to force it out, but it scrapped my mouth as it did. "Jasper, I have seen you get that notice, I have seen you with pain in your eyes as you read in the news about your mother's death, I was there Jasper…I just wasn't visible."

Her words hit me like a punch in the face- you don't feel the pain at first, but as soon as the contact is over, you feel the instant and throbbing sting. She saw me at my weakest, she has seen me in my worst…how is she sitting here? How is she possibly trusting me?

"What else did you see Alice?" I rubbed her shoulder as I said this. I wanted every piece of information I could.

"I saw you after Maria changed you…I know how Maria left you when you were screaming in agony, how they left you there…unwatched, unprotected." She turned in my lap so that she was facing me, her legs straddling my own. I remembered the

Pain.

Torture.

Agony.

Horror.

Please, kill me.

No one deserves this.

Pain, I could remember waking up, surrounded by Maria, and her evil delinquents. Of course, I saw it different at the time; Maria was beautiful. I was in a trance. It was the most powerful infatuation in the existence of mankind. I wondered if Maria had felt it too, and I believed she had when she made me second in command.

Burning.

I can scream and scream, but the pain will not cower. I am stuck in this nightmare. No escape. You'd expect a searing pain to subside eventually, to turn into a dull sting, but this burning got stronger and stronger as I shook and scram and yelled and pleaded to be killed.

"The visions stopped for awhile, and I only saw you a few more times before I met you two days ago." Her voice raised an octave as she reached the end. I could feel the unease washing off of her. What was she hiding?

"Alice, what are you not telling me?" I lifted her chin up so I could look in her golden eyes, begging her for answers.

"I saw one other vision… it was the day you met Charlotte." She cringed, and I understood why. I could remember

"Peter!" I yelled across the room. I knew damn well that he could hear me, but his behavior was in excusable. Peter looked up from the small girl, and gave me a small smile. "Jasper…I beg of you…not her." He helped the young girl up, and she took cover behind him, hiding her face from me. I could feel their emotions… it was sickening. I wanted right then to rip her petite little head off of her shoulders and throw it into the accumulating pile.

"Brother please," Peter approached me. "Save her." He smiled. "I'll leave, I'll get her out of her; I'd come back for you." I ignored him and sauntered over to a weak male vampire. I picked him up by his foot as he struggled, kicking and screaming and lashing out, trying to bite me. Foolish man, I was much stronger than he. I could feel his pain, his worry, and his horror as I reached around his back and grabbed on to the side of his neck. With a twist of my wrist, his neck snapped, and his head was on the ground below me. I looked up, seeing Peter with his mate, Charlotte. She was frightened. She shook as Peter held her closely, as far away from me as possible.

"You cannot save her, peter. Maria is in charge, not I." I growled as I walked forwards.

"What Maria doesn't know won't hurt her." Peter smiled weakly and pushed Charlotte behind him.

I laughed darkly. "But, she will know." I smiled, and stopped walking.

Peters voice cracked, and her cleared his throat, defending his love. "Jasper, look into my eyes, you feel what I'm feeling… isn't it amazing? He reached back for Charlotte's hand. I laughed, "Amazing?" I rolled my eyes, and made my way over to my next victim. Peter moved in front of the woman.

"Jasper, listen to yourself." Peter grabbed my arm and my anger flared. I pushed him aside, and grabbed the woman, killing her quickly. Charlotte let out a sob and I turned to her.

"What do you want?" I said, moving towards her. Peter grabbed her hand from behind and forced her back to his side.

"Jasper," charlotte began. "Jasper please. I will personally take the blame. I know you don't know what I'm feeling, haven't experienced it for yourself…but if you let us go…we will come back for you." She smiled and walked forwards.

"Charlotte, I can't." My words were stuck in my throat, and I turned away from them, hiding my shame. I wanted to but I couldn't.

"But you can Jasper." Her tiny little voice grew strong, and I could hear her feet moving across the floor. Something touched my shoulder, and I instinctively turned around, prepared to attack. Charlotte's face was completely smooth and relaxed. I began to calm down as she spoke again, "Just don't stop us. Don't do anything." She smiled.

I turned around, and walked in the direction of my next 'job'. I heard no movement from across the room, and I waited for them to catch on that this was their chance… after a few moments of silence I turned, and my only friend in the world had disappeared.

"I've changed Alice." I held her eyes on mine, and gave her a small smile, "You have changed me." I said this as I rested my forehead on hers. This moment was absolutely perfect.

Her eyes darted away from mine, and she looked down at her hands. "I know you have changed, but that won't erase what has already been done…"

And, it comes back…again. The pain, the misery…The self hatred. I hung my head in shame. "I know."

"Not that I care…" Alice said happily. Her tiny fingers grabbed my chin and lifted my face to meet hers. "You have to hear what I'm saying Jasper." She forced a tiny pout on her lips. "I. Don't. Care." She smiled. "I don't know any different Jazz. I know you. You are my only friend, and I don't care how many people you have so carelessly murdered. I don't care if you were a monster! I don't care if you were the devil himself," she pulled herself closer to me, her chest touching my own. Her arms slid around my neck and our faces were inches apart. "What's important is that you aren't anymore; and you never will be. This is the Jasper that you are, and always have been." Her right hand slid up from my neck, and tangled itself in my hair. "You can't possibly want this…" my voice was deep and husky; it was coated in pain, and served with a side of cold undead shame. She giggled, and ruffled my hair. "I can prove you wrong there Jazz. You may have hurt people, but you will never hurt me," her eyes closed slightly. "I'm sure of it. The past is done, and the future is never definite," she giggled softly as she said this. "So live in the moment…and in this moment…" she let her left hand join her right on the top of my head. "I want you…as is. Every scar, every crack, every dent…I want it all."

How is this possible? How am I not running? She knows about my every scar, and she isn't afraid? I should be nervous in her presence... well, I am. But, it's a different nervous. I want to make her happy; and I'm nervous that I won't succeed.

But, I want her as much as she wants me. That giggle, her tiny hands… her huge heart. Her whimsical voice… her bright red lips… this woman is all I will ever need.

Now…how do I tell her?


A/N what did you think

?

please tell me... you know, i need to know these things :P :)