The afternoon was dragging on in OSP. Sam and Callen had decided to hit the gym in their spare time, using it as an excuse to avoid paperwork as always. This left Kensi and Deeks alone in the bullpen. Deeks was being unusually diligent about his own share of paperwork, and when his voice penetrated the silence at last, Kensi had to try very hard to hide the smile that threatened to creep onto her lips.
"Kens?" he said nervously, "Kensalina? Exactly how afraid are you of spiders?"
"Where is it Deeks?" she replied in a bored voice, not even bothering to look up.
"It's on Sam's desk and I cant take it anymore, it's staring me down with all eight of its demonic eyes…"
"I my god Deeks it's not even big," she said as she finally observed the spider that was in fact, sitting on Sam's desk.
"I don't care how big it is," said Deeks, scooting his chair away from the creature, "I want it dead."
"What ever happened to live and let live?" said Kensi, who could not help but grin now.
"Yeah, we're not in World War One, this is like world war three, only the enemy is exponentially more terrifying than a bunch of Germans with machine guns..."
"Wow..." she said, looking at him sadly, "that is saying something."
"Ah the Germans," he mused, momentarily forgetting to act scared, "blonde, tall, huge – Ouch! What?!"
She had brought a rolled up magazine down on his head, and was now staring at him threateningly.
"I was gonna say hearts, they have such huge hearts, they're very compassionate people the Germans..."
She raised her eyebrow.
"Alright, alright I'll shut up just please kill that evil thing!"
She rolled her eyes and with a thud she brought the rolled up magazine down onto the spider, leaving an admittedly gross stain on Sam's desk.
"There, sweetie, all better?" she mocked.
"No, that thing was staring me down – aaahh!"
He shivered violently, "I have goose bumps, look!"
"Yes I see that Deeks..."
She rolled her eyes again.
"God's mistake I swear," he said, shuddering again.
"No, I know exactly why god created spiders."
He gave her a look and scoffed, "well this should be good."
She smiled.
"He made them to sort out the real men from the little, baby, boys."
She gave him a look and turned to leave.
"Alright let me get one thing straight I'm a real man okay? I don't cry during chick flicks, well at least not most of them you know Dear John really got me. And I - I
"You what exactly?"
"I just really don't like spiders, they're evil little beasts!"
She scoffed.
"Okay you know what," he said defensively, "I am not alone, 80% of the population has arachnophobia!"
"Uh huh, sure."
"What, you don't believe me?"
She stared at him pitifully.
"Again, real men kill spiders for girls."
"Okay wait - did you just call yourself a man?"
"So what if I did? I just called you a girl."
He chuckled and looked up at her, his brilliant blue eyes twinkling,
"Touché, partner, touché."
