A/N: I am indeed alive, though struggling to find my inner voice in telling this story. I apologize in advance for the lengthy author's note, but I feel the need. To the guest (A fan) who dropped the review on 3/15/19, I humbly thank you. I can't express how touched I was by your words and I'll share that writing is/has been/will always be a refuge for me…an outlet during some of my lowest points. So, your words are meaningful and gratifying. They also inspire me to keep pushing to continue writing this story to its end. To PastOneonta, Maxsmoma and lory77, I am equally touched and grateful for your continued support.

If you are having trouble keeping up with the who's who, there's a family tree included in the Prologue of After the Rain. If you're still confused, don't hesitate to reach out as I make a habit of responding to any PMs received. This is a shorter chapter but one I crafted fondly and with great intent. And now, without further delay…

Chapter 6

The clinking of wind chimes stopped her mid-stride. And Madeline Ross steeled her nerves for another round with Officer Moletti. He'd been circling the store for two days straight, demanding answers on Ryan's whereabouts. Lou was right…enough was enough, and she had a mind to tell him so. Along with filing a formal complaint of harassment. But as she prepared to deliver her sharp tongue lashing, she found herself rendered immobile at the sight of the two imposing native men entering her store. The reservation was small, and Maddie had known it would only be a matter of time before he crossed Ryan's path and came knocking on her door.

Paul's eyes zeroed in on the grey-haired woman standing meekly to the side; his eyes scorching with anger and betrayal. Maya moved to block his path, a warning glare fast in place. Cheveyo's youngest had been shocked at the uncanny resemblance at meeting the then soon to be wolf and had dutifully divulged her suspicions to her knowing father. And though she knew Paul's anger was justified, he was a wild card, and she couldn't allow Maddie to brunt the weight of his frustration. Maya felt protective of the kind woman who'd gifted her with the opportunity of employment.

Madeline Ross sighed in defeat, walking tiredly towards the back of the store; gesturing for them to follow suit.

"I was wondering when you'd come knocking on my door"

"Twenty years too late, apparently…"

Maddie conceded a somber nod before taking a seat on an antique chair nestled by an equally old coffee table. She met his strong gaze in resolution, waiting patiently for the onslaught to begin.

"Why?"

The hurt and confusion in his voice echoed past the enunciation of the word and Maddie felt the weight of her guilt.

But what was he really asking?

Paul didn't himself know… He couldn't imagine what he'd done to merit this type of disregard by the elderly store keeper. She could have…should have told him the day he'd learned of Lily's death. The memory still chaffed his insides raw. But it was Lily's silence which hurt most and he was desperate for any inkling as to the why.

"Because it was only a suspicion Paul…she never confirmed"

"But you knew…"

Accusation laced his every word, prompting Solace to place a restraining hand on the incensed wolf's shoulder as he moved closer to the elderly store keeper.

"It wasn't my truth to share. And I did try to find you after I realized he was beating her, but you were gone…"

Paul recoiled in shame, her words scraping at his already shaky composure.

What could he say to that? She was right…

He'd fled in hopes of placing some much-needed distance between himself and the woman he'd loved. And the ramifications of his choice were difficult to accept.

"That's not fair…you can't put that on him"

Solace's tone was reproachful and an equally reproving voice answered gruffly without missing a beat.

"Maybe not…but it doesn't change the facts. He left and we'll never know what could've happened had he chosen to stay. So get off your high horse with your sanctimonious bullshit, Paul. You should be thanking her for taking that boy in and loving him the way she did"

Lou Ross hurried down the last set of stairs, pulling up to the deflated wolf for good measure. Indignation seeping out of his every pore and Paul deflated onto the old chair, like the sinking man he was. Maddie reached for his hand; the melancholy wolf feeling too beaten down to pull away, welcoming the kind gesture. There was truth in Lou's words, yet he couldn't shake away the resentment at being robbed of the opportunity in knowing his son. The caring storekeeper shared a meaningful look with her devoted husband and Lou released a long sigh. Words unnecessary after so many years shared.

"Come on, get off your ass. There's something you should see…"

Paul followed in silence, drinking in the pictures hanging on the walls as they climbed up the wooden stairs separating the shop from their home. He noted Lou's reluctance before watching him push a door ajar and stepping into the dim lit room. Paul staggered in, slightly overwhelmed by his surroundings. It was Ryan's room and it'd been preserved like he'd only just awoken from his bed. His eyes ricocheted between the walls, taking in the posters decorating his room. Musical idols…a prominent boxer …But it was the picture frames on display among the shiny trophies on the shelf which captivated his gaze.

Bantamweight Champion… Junior Champion…Pacific Midwest Champion…

And he searched Lou's gaze; a silent, beseeching request for knowledge.

"The kid was a natural…"

"Did you train him?"

"Yeah…we made a deal shortly after Lily's death. She'd been opposed, but I knew it would keep him out of trouble. He was carrying so much…he needed an outlet. But I never imagined he'd be that dam good…"

Lou couldn't keep the smile from his face and Paul felt a strange sense of pride building inside his chest. It was nothing he could take credit for, but it still felt good; gratitude to the aging boxing trainer growing exponentially by the minute. The way his eyes crinkled when recalling a hard earned win or the softness in his tone when speaking of Ryan's grit and gigantic heart told him he cared significantly more than he let on, and it only made Paul all the more grateful.

Solace took his leave, and Paul continued drinking up as much information as Lou was willing to disclose.

Ryan's headstrong personality…his unflinching loyalty to those he cared for…his misguided need to fix other people's problems…

Paul listened and listened some more, submerged under the knowledge and yet still thirsty for more. But it was Maddie who pushed past his limit, crumbling his remaining poise by placing an old photo album on his lap.

"I think she would have wanted you to have this, Paul"

He wouldn't get past the first page, closing the vinyl cover and coming to his feet; graciously excusing himself from their home with the album secured in his grip. He lingered through the familiar streets before heading towards his solitary cabin. The photograph album heavier and heavier in his hands yet he couldn't will himself to look. Paul hesitated before entering his home, a curious smile gracing his lips as he surveyed the scene before him. Surprised, with the comfort his visitor's presence birthed.

"Comfortable?"

"You don't mind, do you?"

Jacob's toothy grin was blinding, his eyes traveling to the old photo album speculatively from his place on the couch. His legs propped comfortably on the armrest as he sipped on one of Paul's beers.

"That depends…are you here on Baby Alpha Jr.'s behalf?

Jacob's eyes narrowed in distaste, slighted by the insinuation.

"No jackass...I thought you could use the company"

Theirs was a complicated relationship…And once upon a time, the old Alpha would've forced his company on his unruliest wolf to provide him the balance needed. But those times were long gone, and Jacob often wondered if Paul welcomed his company as much as he did his. Nostalgia maybe… or pack bonds at play, but neither could deny the growing attachment felt through the passing years.

Paul walked with purpose, pulling down two glasses and a bottle of hooch from his kitchen cabinet. He swatted Jacob's legs off his couch as only he could, before sinking down next to him. They drank in comfortable silence. The scorching liquor traveling down his gorge, numbing the knot stuck in his throat. He threw his head back in exhaustion, eyes shut, with the photo album secured over his lap by one hand. There was a subtle tug against his grip and his fingers loosened their hold without thought; an imprint of his tenacious clutch marking the vinyl cover. There was relief in letting go…

"He has her eyes, but the rest is all you. I don't know how I missed it. I'm sorry man…"

Paul's eyes wandered to the photograph in Jacob's hand. A look of pure love in Lily's eyes as she gazed down at the infant cuddled in her arms.

"Only you could find a way to blame yourself for this. And I would be all too happy to let you take the blame but we both know this one's all on me Jacob"

Paul was both proud and self-assured, but Jacob recognized the defeat saturating his every word. He'd seen it after Leah's departure and then upon his learning of Lily's death. The stench of his misery oozed out of his pores, but it was his next question which troubled him most.

"Am I so deplorable to not deserve knowing my child? Or was it her way of punishing me for walking away?"

"You know better than that"

Jacob watched him down the rest of moonshine in one large gulp, disapproval heavy in his response.

"Do I?"

"Would you have left if she'd told you the truth?"

"Of course not"

"Well there's your answer …"

And Paul clutched to it like a drowning man, desperate to believe it true; selfish in his desire to consider she hadn't aimed to hurt him. Lily had been a selfless soul…it wasn't a stretch to believe she'd remained silent to provide him the freedom of choice. And yet the thought made him physically ill, considering all it'd cost her. His eyes prickled with unshed tears, forcing his gaze away. It was foolish pride to do so; knowing Jacob could scent the salt of his tears. But the old Alpha wasn't going anywhere. He'd swallow through the uncomfortable situation in his quest to offer his support.

"Ryan's not going to make this easy for you, Paul. He has your foolish pride. But he needs you now more than ever. He's scared and confused and unwilling to let anyone in. You can do this…you have too"

Paul met his gaze, sensing the urgency in his words.

"Did something else happen?"

"Yeah…He imprinted"

"WHAT? Well that's gotta be some kind of record…On who?"

Jacob released a chuckle of amusement, still giddy from the turn of events.

"He imprinted on Akeimi. Cheveyo pulled her out of harm's away after he started blurring and well…let's just say he didn't appreciate it too much... It was a shit-show, though surprisingly Lahote seems to be handling things fairly well"

"Huh…"

Paul couldn't keep the sly grin from his lips. He held a soft spot for his little peanut and the promise of this newly forged bond made his heart swell with joy, though Jacob's words caused him great concern.

"My kid hates me…he's not going to listen to anything I have to say"

"You found a way to make Solace and Oliver listen once upon a time, you can do it again. And you can't just give up…"

"I didn't say I was…just that I don't know where to start"

"Well that's easy…why reinvent the wheel?"

Seth's cheerful voice mirrored his sunny smile as he entered the woodsy cabin, not waiting for a proper invitation. And though his perkiness tended to annoy the moody wolf, he needed a dose of his endless optimism.

"He won't agree to live here," continued the jolly wolf, "But we can be creative with his training. He's itching to gain enough control to avoid being babysat, right? And nothing seems to set him off like you, Paul. So, we tell him it's in his best interest he's exposed to a daily dose of your cheerful disposition in order to test his control"

"Seth, you're a genius…."

Jacob's wide, toothy grin betrayed his excitement, but Paul wasn't sold on the idea.

"He's not gonna agree to that…and what exactly are you proposing I do with him?"

"Well that's up to you papa…"

Paul's eyes narrowed down to slits as he glared at Seth's arm, which now draped his shoulder snuggly, while hit with a deep bout of Deja vu.

The Alpha and Beta combo ganging up on him to impart their unsolicited advice...

And Paul recognized it'd indeed occurred in a different life…a much simpler life without the weight of regrets, misspoken words and all they'd lost. The nostalgia stung, but his pack brothers' company soothed those cracks of old wounds. A boyish smirk began to form at the corner of his lips as Seth rambled on, turning into a genuine small smile as Jacob placed the open album on his lap, pointing to a jubilant, crooked grin; one very much akin to his own. And the prospect of it all didn't feel as daunting as moments ago. So, with a deep sigh, the encouraged wolf turned the page…


It wasn't often she was caught off-guard. And as she narrowly dodged his attack, realized just how distracted she'd been.

"You're not fooling anyone you know…you're a terrible liar Tikaani"

She rounded back, landing a swift kick to his flank.

"Why don't you focus on your speed and technique instead of babbling out nonsense?"

Kayan's eyes narrowed in annoyance, still recovering from the impact of her strength. It hurt less now and he'd almost managed to lean away in time, serving to confirm what he already knew. The phase was inevitable…

"Better…but not good enough little brother"

She backed away still facing him, a sign of her growing respect in his fighting skill. He towered over her, growing a solid four inches in the last month. And she liked taking stock of the changes in his youthful, handsome face. Kayan held Leah's stubbornness and grit, encased by their father's humility and quiet nature. But it was his jovial smile which Tikaani loved best. It brought her hope on the lowest of days.

"You can't duck her forever you know. Nauja knows you're hiding something…it's only a matter of time before she corners you…"

"I don't know what you're talking about" was the last thing she threw over her shoulder before scurrying away. Except Tikaani did know…she'd been dodging Leah and her mother for weeks and it was getting harder to keep the building resentment and resulting guilt at bay. The wolf she encountered in the woods was from La Push, she was sure of it. And the resemblance had been unmistakable. Which pointed to the obvious…a shitload of kept secrets with dire implications for her people.

But how? And how much did her parents already know? It was these very doubts which kept Tikaani silent. There'd been no survivors who posed a threat to Chikuk's throne…that's what she'd been told. Her mother was his closest living relative, but she wasn't perceived as a legitimate threat. She-wolves were never granted status of authority in the pack. Which was the biggest joke of all considering the wolves lived off their hunting and combat acumen.

And then there was Leah to consider…Disclosing what she'd witness would surely stir up her unrest. There'd been a time when Tikaani worried on Aylen's behalf. There was no mistaking Leah's loyalty to her father, but she'd been apprehensive over the she-wolf's ability to accept their ways. Not that it was much of a life, but they'd formed their own little pack of sorts. And Leah's unease had significantly dimmed after Kayan's birth.

But Tikaani shared Leah's restlessness. She was tired of bowing down…tired of conforming and following a man she despised. If she spoke out, Leah would undoubtedly venture out in search of her people, forcing Aylen to act on her behalf and potentially placing them all in danger. But what if this was the opportunity for something more? Except she couldn't say what more was, having never known any other life. Her parents no longer spoke of the old ways, perhaps it was too painful to recall and yearn for something long gone.

But her family was growing, and Leah was sure they'd be welcoming a girl into their insulated family. She didn't want this life for her siblings; Kayan's parentage and rising skill would undoubtedly be a threat to their unreasonable leader and life as a She-wolf was a life sentence of servitude.

No…something needed to be done.

Tikaani's thoughts wavered like the surfs of those Italian beaches she'd now committed to memory. It seemed like a lifetime ago they'd been fighting for their survival with an injured Leah clinging to life. And yet she'd never known such freedom as in those nights spent under the desert sky. Could they experience that once again? It was this grain of hope propelling her feet forward towards the two women sitting by the nearing fire. Tikaani scanned her surroundings, assuring it was safe to speak. Her heart drummed with increasing speed, capturing the 2 she-wolves' gazes. Her hands shook with nerves as she crouched down by Leah's side ; resolution steady in her striking eyes before speaking out words Nauja had been curiously awaiting, yet nowhere prepared to hear. Words, which would serve as a catalyst, setting off a chain of events too intricate and far-reaching for any of them to fully comprehend…


"English mate...speak proper English. You can't bloody expect me to make sense of this"

Gideon turned the blueprints upside down, trying to make sense of the meticulous designs, and Hawk answered with an indulgent chuckle. The same one he'd adopted throughout the last week when met with similar looks of skepticism. Never in his wildest dreams would he have imagined the real reason he'd been summoned such a distance away. This had Ethan's name all over it, and Hawk couldn't help but admire their Beta's cunning mind.

You need to be reminded of all the things you are capable of Hawk…to find purpose once again.

The one-sided conversation as they'd driven to the airport, coming to the forefront of the introspective wolf's mind. And Hawk couldn't deny the spark of excitement flickering at the prospect of creating freely. The wheels inside his head hadn't stopped turning since learning what it was Tamàs sought of him and he'd happily rendered his focus to the project since.

No tedious contract negotiations to deal with…no senior partners pushing their conservative styles on him, and no timelines to abide by, or reins on his creative control. Well, maybe just a little on the latter…

Tamàs had ideas of his own and Hawk would do his best to bring them to life. The confidence he bestowed on him was humbling yet it was daunting all the same. But the excitement and hope among the werewolves was infectious, bolstering Hawk's resolve.

"It's just a scale to calculate the distance between the constructions being built. It helps me conceptualize the space Gideon"

And the jolly werewolf wasn't appeased by Hawk's words, frustrated by his fixation on the slightest of details. Gideon was all about the end-product and anxious to see the clan finally put down some roots. He was itching to get started on the labor and didn't see much value in the extensive planning.

"We're not building towers mate…just a couple of farm houses"

"Yes, but we need to plan carefully, just in case you guys decide to build more"

And Gideon understood why Tamàs had such faith in Hawk. The kind lycan was always thinking one step ahead, encouraging Gideon to do the same. Except the carefree werewolf had a hard time thinking past the now…A concept he was working on, more so now as the La Push Alpha's daughter haunted his thoughts with increasing frequency.

"Sure mate… find me when you're ready to begin, yeah?"

A smile of amusement graced Hawk's lips, as he watched his friend saunter away. The three wolves had been welcomed with open arms by the clan, but Caleb, Tokola and Hawk had formed a genuine bond with the four werewolves who'd been tasked with bringing them to safety. How could they not after facing possible death together? And For Hawk, it was particularly moving they'd embraced him without judgement.

The observant wolf surveyed the vast land, comprehensive of why Tamàs had selected this acreage. A large stream cut through the land; the soil rich for planting. The forestry provided ample lumber for the construction, and it was remote enough to allow them privacy, yet accessible via land. A perfect place for new beginnings.

Hawk continued walking with purpose, smiling at the working groups assembled to assist. His lupine nose leading him towards the wolf he was seeking to see. Caleb sat eerily still by a cliff's edge, seemingly lost in thought. Not an uncommon occurrence, but one Hawk was beginning to worry over. The extroverted wolf was doing his best to assimilate, but there were moments of melancholia which he struggled to hide. Different cliffs than the ones he'd left behind, though the solitude and setting provided much-needed comfort.

"Caleb, we're putting together the working groups. Tokola's done some carpentry with Paul. Are you good if I assign you to his group?"

"Hmmm?"

"The working groups…do you have a preference?"

"No not really…whatever you decide is fine with me"

His indifference further fueling his concern.

"Come on man, this isn't like you. What's going on?"

"Stop worrying about me, Hawk. I'm good… But what about you, huh? How are you doing with all of this?"

It was evasion at its finest. But Caleb couldn't muster the courage to divulge any details on his personal woes, and truly was curious in learning Hawk's thoughts on the monumental task they'd been charged with.

"I mean this is huge…like, we're not going back anytime soon kinda huge. Aren't you the least bit upset with what they signed you up for?"

The thought had crossed his mind, but Hawk had been relieved in learning he wouldn't need to worry about killing idle time. Periods of silence had usually propelled him towards downward spirals.

"Not really. It might not be such a bad thing for me, Caleb. But it sounds like it may be for you"

Caleb was lost for words. He'd sought separation from La Push yet was undoubtedly unprepared to deal with the aftermath of his choice. And he couldn't voice his apprehension without betraying the source of his anguish. But Tokola's look of distress as he approached saved him from a reply.

"We should run a patrol…"

It was code for the need to speak in private and both wolves followed him down towards the forest in silence. They'd grown use to Tokola's fleeting thoughts during patrols. His memories and feelings often played out like the picture frames in those films from the 20's. But they weren't having trouble following his train of thought now. Going long periods without phasing made all wolves jittery and Tokola had utilized the opportunity to explore the territory in his wolf form with Tamàs's blessing.

He'd ventured further than planned after catching the faint trace of blood. The scent growing in intensity as he'd trailed deeper into the woods, leading him to a ghastly scene. Piled carcasses of large bucks tainted the ground floor; the rancid scent of decayed flesh thick in the air. The flesh wounds spoke of large predators at work, with no regard for their kill. But it was the presence of that other scent which unsettled Tokola most. It was lupine, there was no mistaking it.

Hawk planted his nose to the ground, uncovering several sets of large paw prints leading south; too large to belong to normal wolves. And it was Caleb's perturbed finding which confirmed what they'd been too uneasy to think aloud. The trail of paws ended where human ones began. Shapeshifters…and the discovery sent their wild thoughts into overdrive.

They'd had no direct contact with the pack, preventing Hawk from sharing what he'd witness on their journey here. Leaving them stagnant on a course of action. But all three wolves knew this was not something they could tackle on their own and agreed it was time they shared with the clan. The presence of supernatural creatures so near the werewolves' den could not be kept silent. And so the three wolves made their way back to camp; restlessness heavy on their spirits as they entered the large burgundy tent in search of the man whose guidance they'd need to rely on, now being so far away from home…

Playlist

Beating Myself Up-CuckooLander

The Darkest Side- The Middle East