And the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares that
infest the day
Shall fold their tents like the Arabs
And as
silently steal away.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, The
Day Is Done
Chapter 07: The Music Box.
He was
still watching her, he felt as if he had been doing it his whole
life.
This time, Skyla was sitting by the fire in a hearth of a
family friend who had offered them a place to stay for the night.
They had been humbled and awed by his presence for none of them had
ever been to the capitol. Skyler gained new insight on his childhood
crush through these people as he realized that if her mother had not
worked in the palace, she would probably have grown up a poor
farmer's daughter. It made her horror over his selection to be king
all the more palatable because he knew suddenly that deep down she
must've always felt that she was not worthy even to be his friend.
He knew for a fact that his brother thought the same every day.
As if sensing his thoughts, Skyla shifted and looked at him, her eyes ageless in the firelight. Her mother's music box was next to her, winking in the flames. It was a chilling sight.
He sighed
and looked to the floor.
Skyla sniffed and shifted again. "What
is it Skyler?" she queried softly. Her tone was neutral, almost
kind. An age that he didn't associate with her had crept into her
voice. Whether it had happened over night or over the past couple of
years he couldn't say.
"I…" He hesitated. "I was just thinking."
For a moment there was a spark of defiance in her eyes as her hand dropped to the music box. "Don't pity me," she hissed.
Skyler held up his hands quickly and shook his head. "It's not that Skyla," he said quickly. "I'll never pity you. But, I won't deny that I feel sorry for you. I was just wondering what you were going to do now."
Skyla gave him a sceptical look before she sighed and shrugged. "I'm going home," she said quietly. "You're mother's waiting for me. With… I don't know. I can stay there and do something. I have a pretty good future there. Or, potential one."
He blinked and sat up sharply. "But, what of your duties here?" he demanded. "Your family's estates? Your friend? Your life here?"
There was a painful look in her blue eyes. "What life Skyler?" she queried softly. "For the past five years the only thing I did here was come and visit my father. There, I have an education, a chance to become a great dancer. Later, become a teacher. People there value me a lot more than people value me here." She swept her hand around the room. "Here, I will never be more than a poor farmer's daughter who would never have gotten anywhere in life, save for a field, had it not been for her mother's position with the queen."
Skyler's
mind was reeling. "But that's not your home!" He pointed out.
"And, people value you here Skyla. You're father's friends.
Your mother's. I know my father likes you. How can a place where
people don't even fly be better than here? We'll never see you
again! I'll…" He trailed off, embarrassed to realize that he
had almost started shouting.
Skyla's ageless eyes met his, her
blue gaze shinning in the firelight. "You'll what?" she queried
softly.
Skyler swallowed against the dryness in his throat and
took a quick, painful breath. "I won't ever see you again," he
said softly.
Skyla
looked at him for a long time, then sighed softly and looked back to
the fire. "Maybe that's for the best," she said quietly. "Maybe
that's how it should be Skyler."
Her words hurt him. "How
can you say that?" he demanded softly. "Skyla, we were friends
once. I like to think that we still are. I told you this before. I…
want you to be a part of my life."
There was an old sadness in her eyes but a new bluntness that her grief had exposed. "For what Skyler?" she queried softly. "What will I ever be to you? A friend? Tell me, here in this moment; do you think that either of us will ever be satisfied with that?"
Skyler
swallowed dryly, his throat dry. "What do you mean?" he queried.
"Of course. We were best friends once Skyla. I see no reason why we
still can't be. I never saw why we had to stop being friends."
She snorted a soft laugh and shook her head sadly. "You know as
well as I do why we stopped being friends Skyler," she said softly.
"And, why we can never be just friends. Or…" Her voice went
lower. "Have you not thought of me every day? Have I not crossed
your mind at least once before the sun sets? Tell me Skyler. For, if
it is so – and you have not spared me as much as a thought except
on the odd occasion, then you know that we can never be friends. 0r
rather, just friends."
Her steady
blue eyes met his, the force of them emphasized by her grief and
loneliness by the fire. Skyler's heart thundered in his chest, his
eyes unable to leave hers. Yet, he feared what lay in them suddenly,
feared the force she had over him.
I love you Skyla, he
wanted to say but the words would not cross his mouth even though
they had been written on his heart for as long as he could remember.
And he knew that she could read them on his soul as surely as he
could feel the echo of them in hers. He wanted to lean forward and
kiss her, but when he moved the music box winked at him, bringing him
back to himself.
"This is not the time for this Skyla," he said quietly. "You are grieving the loss of your parents. The world must feel… Different. Twisted. Why don't we sleep and we'll see how you feel in the morning? You are not thinking straight." I would hate to take advantage of that.
His words brought a dry laugh from her as she turned her gaze away from his to stare into the fire. "Grief gives you clarity you cannot comprehend Skyler," she said quietly. "I feel as if I'm seeing the world for the first time tonight." Her hand strayed to the music box. "Tomorrow, we will return to the kingdom and I will leave with your mother to that world. And, I will stay there most probably for the rest of my life. Why? Because I cannot bare the thought of you marrying someone else. Of you touching another woman. Strange isn't it?" Her eyes returned to his. "We have not seen each other in five years. Not really. And yet, here we are, still dancing around each other like we did when we were children. Only this time, instead of not wanting to be caught, we do and we both know that we cannot. In five years, that should've changed but it hasn't, even if we have." She smiled as if seeing the world's biggest joke but there were tears in her eyes.
He was moving closer to her before he truly knew what he was doing. As if in a trance he watched his hand as it reached up and wiped the trail of moisture from her face. She closed her eyes but, instead of moving away from him, she leaned into his hand and carefully kissed the inside of his wrist. When her eyes met his again they were darker than the night around them. He smiled at her, shyly, and leaned forward to slowly return the kiss she had given him all those years ago.
"I don't think it's strange," he said softly as he pulled away from her for a moment. "For… I have thought of you every day of my life and have wished you by my side every second. If…"
He
couldn't say it as he froze suddenly, frightened that what he said
next might make him loose her forever. He did not want to impose on
her grief, nor take advantage of her because of it. Yet, Skyla smiled
at him and carefully reached up and caressed his cheek.
"If
tonight is all we have," she said quietly. "And, it is Skyler for
if I cannot marry you, then I would rather not lay eyes on you ever
again. Then… Let's make the most of it."
&&&
To Be Continued…
AN: Yes, yes this is a pathetically short chapter, but I wanted to show you that I'm still alive but use the rest of my evening to write a letter to write to the person I would love to sit with the fire with. AKA – no time for longer chapter. I'm working very hard at the moment and my minutes are precious. But, not so precious that I can't spend them on you. :P
Hope you are all well and healthy.
Alyss
-;--
