Chapter Seven
Over the next few weeks, Ava and I became closer and closer friends. When Anya and the rest of the group found out, they weren't happy, to say the least. But there was nothing they could do. I wasn't going to let Anya control who I became friends with. She could try to kick me out of the group, but it wasnt going to work. I had made a place for myself and I knew that Mark wouldn't let her do it. James either.
That situation was becoming increasingly complicated. I had become more attached to James than I should have. The guilt was building up inside of me. Then something happened that made things a hell of a lot worse.
I sat on the toilet seat, breathing deeply, my heart pounding fast. Tears were threatening to fall from my eyes. I looked at the test again and the blue plus sign jumped out at me. Positive. I was pregnant. This could not be happening. We were always so careful! Weren't we? I thought back to when it could have happened, and it struck me. That time three weeks before at his house. We didnt use protection. I tossed the test into the trash pail and buried my face in my hands. I emitted a shuddering sob and erupted into tears. I stayed like that for almost an hour. I knew my parents had left for work and my sister was still asleep. I cleaned myself up and went downstairs to the kitchen. The cordless phone lay on the table. I picked it up and with trembling fingers dialed Mark's number. He picked up on the second ring.
"Hello?"
"Hi," My voice was soft as I struggled to control it.
"Hey babe, whats up?"
"Can you come over?"
"Sure, is everything okay?"
"Just come, please," I begged. Mark's confusion was evident, even through the phone.
"Sure, I'll be there in ten," I hung up the phone and put it back on the table. I sat down and waited.
Mark arrived in less than ten minutes. I opened the door for him and let him in. I led him into the living room and sat down on the couch. His concerned green eyes bore into mine so intensely that I had to look away.
"Whats wrong?" He asked. His voice was so gentle and caring that I burst into another fit of guilty tears. He tried to put his arms around me but I pushed him away. Now the confusion was etched into every line on his face. "Tell me whats wrong,"
"I don't want to tell you but I know I have to,"
"Are you...breaking up with me?" He asked softly. I shook my head slightly and he sighed in relief.
"But you might want to break up with me,"
"Just tell me what's wrong," Mark insisted. I took a deep breath before saying it right out.
"Mark," I said slowly, "I'm pregnant," His eyes widened and then his face assumed the confused expression once again.
"But we haven't done anything,"
"I know," I said softly. His eyes darkened as he realized what I was saying.
"So you were with someone else?" The lump in my throat made it impossible for me to speak without crying again so I simply nodded. "Was it James?" I nodded again. Mark's eyes darkened and I was afraid that he would do something drastic. "How long?"
"Almost a month," The hurt in his eyes was too much. I emitted a shuddering sob.
"I think I should go," Mark said. The tone in his voice told me we were over. I shouldn't have expected him to stay with me after this. But it still hurt me.
"I'm sorry," I whispered as he got up to leave.
"Me too," He said, as he walked out of the front door. As the door closed, I buried my face in the pillows and cried my heart out until the phone rang. I tried to collect myself, in vain before answering the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey Lily, what's wrong?" I ignored James' question.
"I need to talk to you about something,"
"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can," I hung up the phone and stared at the wall until he got to my house. I opened the door and led him into the living room. James sat down in the same spot that Mark occupied only a half hour before. I didn't waste any time beating around the bush.
"I'm pregnant," James' jaw dropped. I nodded. "I just told Mark. Things are over between me and him." James scooted over and put his arm around me. It was then that I couldnt control it anymore. I began sobbing uncontrollably. He gathered me into his arms and held me like a child and let me cry until I couldnt cry anymore.
"What are we going to do?" He asked, after I had calmed down.
"We?"
"You didn't think I was just going to walk away from this did you? It's as much my fault as it is yours," I managed a weak smile at his kindness. The phone rang from under me. It had fallen between the couch cushions while I was crying.
"Hello?"
"Hey Lily whats up? I havent talked to you in forever," It was Alice. I had been neglecting our friendship for the last few weeks.
"Yeah I know, I've been really busy,"
"Oh, well I'm just calling to tell you that I wanted to invite you to sleep over tonight. My mom said she would pick you up and everything," This was a shock. Her mom never picked anyone up.
"That sounds great. I have to talk to you about something anyway. I'll call you when my mom gets home,"
"Great, talk to you later," I hung up the phone and turned my attention back to James.
"Yeah that was my best friend,"
"Oh," He replied simply. Just then, I happened to look up at the clock. It read 12:37.
"Shit!" I exclaimed. "You have to leave! Now! My mom will be home any second. If you're here I'll be so dead. Even deader than I will be when she finds out about this situation," I practically shoved the poor boy out of the house, leaving him only with a quick kiss. Not five minutes after he drove off, my mother parked in the driveway. I raced up the stairs and ran smack into my sister who looked up at me with her large brown eyes. Just by glancing into them, I knew that she knew. She heard what happened when James was in our living room. She knew my secret. As the front door opened, I grabbed her arm and pulled her into my bedroom. I put my hands on her shoulders and made her look at me.
"You can't tell anyone. Do you understand?" We had a moment just then. A sisterly one. I knew that she would keep my secret. She could feel how important it was. I didnt need any threats to convince her.
"Lily, Petunia!" My mothers voice echoed from down the stairs.
000
I sat on the pink carpeting of Alice's bedroom, my green eyes cast downward. Alice sat in front of me, her eyes wide and her mouth practically on the floor.
"You're what!?" She hissed incredulously.
"Pregnant,"
"Are you sure?" I nodded slowly. "So Mark got you pregnant,"
"No," I said. That threw her off guard. She frowned.
"Wait, what?" I sighed.
"Mark didn't get me pregnant,"
"So you're not pregnant?"
"No I am. It's not Mark's though. It's James'," Alice rolled her eyes.
"This just gets better and better. So explain to me exactly what is going on,"
"Okay. I told you about all the parties that Mark took me to?" Alice nodded and urged me to continue. "Well what I didn't tell you is that Mark got wasted at every single one and James drove me home every time, except one but that's not important. One party Mark couldn't make it to, so James took me. I got kinda drunk, and then we...well yeah," Alices jaw was on the floor again.
"So you're pregnant because he took advantage of you?"
"Not...exactly" Alice frowned. "After that it happened more often, and I wasn't always drunk either,"
"And you did this behind Mark's back?" I nodded, ashamed. As I explained it to her, it made me sound more and more like a slut. I felt dirty. "Do your parents know?" I shook my head.
"But I have to tell them soon,"
